Chapter 3

Two of The Best

A/N: Hello Ponies and Stallions! I have something to say, I said I would show two ponies at a time right? Well, since I wanna give ya something to read I'll introduce one at a time, sorry everypony…

After many self-inflicted punches, Alan finally was able to lay down on the very soft bed. He stared at the ceiling and silently prayed that he was either dead or it was some kind of crazy dream from being knocked out in the Black Hawk's crash. Alan's eyes finally closed around 10 o'clock, or so his watch said.

Alan felt something pushing against his side. He grumbled and opened his eyes and saw the unfamiliar roof of Twilight Sparkle's home. He looked down and realized his pistol was poking his side. He grumbled again and sat up "another night without a blanket, night number 6" He said jokingly to himself. He stood up and stretched his back, which popped four times.

'How in the hell can ponies sleep on slabs like this? Damn, even the standard issue cot is better than that…'

Alan sat back down and grabbed his boots. After he had those on he pulled his USMC blouse back on and continued to put the rest of his everyday gear on. He walked into the main room and looked around "well, time for…breakfast…" He realized that he wasn't on Earth anymore. He mentally face palmed and he paced around the room, waiting for either Twilight or Spike to wake up. He looked at a nearby window and noticed there wasn't any light out. "well shit" he muttered "no way they'll wake up at…" he looked at his watch "3:45?" Alan sighed and decided to go for a quick stroll. He opened the front door and stepped out into the chilly morning air. He heard something, like whispering. he looked left and right but didn't see anyone.

'that's strange, whoever it was sounded like they were close' Alan walked around the house but he didn't find anything 'alright what the hell'

Then he heard foot steps. They were running. Alan turned the corner and saw two ponies, one was red the other was nearly pitch black with red eyes. "Hey, what are-" The black one knocked Alan on his ass then took to the sky and fled. When he got up, the red pony was gone

"What the hell?… This place keeps getting stranger and stranger" he grumbled and decided to go wait for Twilight.

6:02 AM Twilight's house

Alan picked up the final bag and loaded it into the strange chariot that would take them to Ponyville. He walked over to Twilight and Spike "Everything's loaded Twilight" said pony smiled and used her magic to replace the book she just took down "good, thank you Alan" She and Spike got on the chariot "Come on Alan"

He hesitated but eventually got on. As soon as they took off, Alan's hands instantly found the walls of the chariot. He wasn't able to trust flying things because of his last flight that he had. He watched as the ground raced out from under him and became smaller and smaller. He clenched the railing with a grip that would make Chuck Norris proud.

Alan felt something touch his forearm. He looked over and sure enough it was Twilight, wearing her infectious smile "Don't worry Alan, I created a magical barrier that protects us from falling" Alan let a small, fake smile tug his lips, but he didn't loosen his iron grasp.

Once they landed, Alan unloaded their stuff into Twilight's new house. After a few minutes of arguing, Spike had finally convinced Twilight to meet new friends and complete a checklist that they created.

Alan approached Twilight "Hey Twilight, I have an idea. If we split up and take half of that list with either one of us, we can get done faster" Twilight nodded "yeah, we can do that" She said and ripped the piece of paper in half "Here, go to the designated places and find each person who's assigned to each of the tasks"

Alan nodded "fair enough… so… I have to go to… uh…" He looked around for whoever was supposed to 'clear the sky of clouds' He sighed and turned to the Ponyville town square "I'll go this way" He decided after Twilight and Spike left, shaking their heads.

Alan looked at the sky "well, whoever is supposed to do this sure is sucking ass at it" He sighed and let his shoulders droop. He was able to escape from the strange ponies and live out in the wilderness by himself for the rest of his life.

'you know, that doesn't sound too bad… maybe I can find our chopper, take as many MREs as possible then leave? God help me, if I begin to have second thoughts about leavi-' Alan's thoughts were cut short when something slammed into him harder than two monster trucks on nitro with rockets attached to their bodies. He grunted as whatever crashed into him tumbled with him and knocked his helmet clean off his head. Alan came to a rest on his back with something tealish laying on his chest.

She pushed off of him and blushed a little "oops… Sorry about that, got caught in a rogue kite for a minute" Alan shook his disorientation away and rubbed his black hair "It's alright, I was about to die of boredom anyway"

The pony got off of Alan and allowed him to stand up "Next time, at least yell out a warning before knocking me on my ass alright?" He picked up his helmet and placed it back on his head, then turned to the new pony. Who was staring at him with a questionable little gleam in her eyes.

'do you fucking ponies ALWASE stare at me like that?'

"what ARE you?" she asked and zipped around Alan, studying his body closely. He was surprised when a rainbow came from her tail, but then saw that her tail WAS the rainbow, as well as her mane. "I am a human" He said plainly and picked up his list "You wouldn't happen to be-"

"Rainbow Dash! Fastest Pegasus in Equestria!" She announced and struck a pose that made Alan stare for a whole three seconds. He snapped out of his small trance "Oh, good, well, I'm here to say, you're doing a horrible job of clearing the skies for the raising of the sun"

"HEY! I can clear the skies in ten seconds FLAT!"

Alan grabbed his watch "oh really?"

Rainbow Dash looked surprised "Yeah REALLY!"

"Ready?"

"what? OH, yeah lets do this"

"GO!" Alan pressed the 'start' button on his watch then watched as Rainbow Dash flew through the sky and cleared it of all surrounding clouds. She swooped and kicked and shoved everything away, which was also fascinating for Alan to watch. Not the cloud moving but the flying pony.

Rainbow Dash landed and Alan pressed the 'pause' button on his watch. Dash approached him "So, how do ya like THAT?" Alan sighed and stood as if he just shot a civvie, "You didn't clear the sky in ten seconds" He said, not showing his mischievous grin that wanted to show itself.

Rainbow Dash's face went from boasting to surprised "WHAT? No, you're lying" She said and stomped her hoof. Alan grinned "you're right Rainbow Dash, you cleared the sky in eight seconds, flat. congrats" He patted her on the head, between her ears and gently rubbed her incredibly soft mane "you've beaten your record apparently" he removed his hand. Dash blushed "t-thanks… what's your name?"

"Alan Burning, nice to meet you. And good job with the sky" He did an about-face and started walking toward a sign post. Dash hesitated for a second before galloping after Alan "hey, can I… uh… hang out with you for a while?" Alan looked at her and shrugged "why the fuck not. Maybe you can help me find 'Sweet Apple Acres'?"

Dash's face lit up "yes! I know where that is, follow me!" she ran off much faster than Alan could hope for without an ATV or other motor vehicle. He started jogging after his new 'friend' but soon realized it was hopeless to even try and catch up with Dash. She rocketed back to him "what's wrong? Can't you go any faster?" Alan shook his head "look, I have two legs, no wings, and I weigh about two-hundred seventy-five pounds with all my gear on me. Would you mind just walking with me?"

Rainbow Dash smiled and landed next to him, about four centimeters apart. Alan looked at her "a bit close don't you think?" Dash blushed again and stepped away "yeah… sorry" Alan grinned and shook his head "don't be sorry Rainbow Dash it's not like I disapprove of being close" Alan mentally fistface'd himself with Thor's hammer when he realized what he had just said. Rainbow Dash resumed her place right by his side.

'WHAT THE FUCK BURNING?!' he screamed in his mind and kicked himself in the nuts. Twice. With steal toe boots. That had spikes on them. That exploded. And sent needles everywhere. That were on fire. And also exploded.

Alan felt his arm occasionally touch Rainbow Dash's body, but apparently she didn't care very much. "so" he said breaking the small moment of awkward silence "What's it like… being able to touch clouds?" Dash smiled and looked at Alan "Oh man… well, I've been able to touch clouds all my life. It's like this with all Pegasus" Rainbow Dash continued about herself and listened to Alan when he told her about things that he owned on Earth. She was intrigued by something he called an 'F-420 Ground Pounder' that could fly faster than the speed of sound. He said that he had some flying experience but it wasn't something to boast about. Eventually they made it to a gate that lead to a house and a red barn.

"well, here it is" Dash said with a little bit of sadness in her voice. Alan stopped halfway through the gate "What? I thought you said you wanted to come with me?" he patted Dash's back and followed her through the gate to meet the one they called 'Apple Jack', which honestly reminded Alan of the cereal on Earth called Applejacks. He looked at Rainbow Dash's happy face and noticed the way she had a bit of pep in her step.

'maybe making friends ISN'T such a bad thing?'