Hello! Nothing much to say, so I'll go directly to the story. I know my chapters are short...but my chapters are just like that :-| I'll try to make them longer...
Chapter 8
Amu's POV:
Ikuto looked at me blankly, but it wasn't long before hurt filled his eyes, along with something else...regret?
"So you know I'm Hoshimi." I say.
He nods.
"Why didn't you tell me you knew? I could have stopped with the whole acting like strangers thing."
His eyes narrow, "Why didn't YOU tell me who you were when you came? You knew who I was from the start. I didn't have some secret identity. My name was right there, and the teacher even put you next to me."
"I was supposed to keep my identity a secret; you think I have a fake name just for my amusement?! And I didn't exactly want to talk to you either. In fact, I don't even remember what stupid idea made me agree to this meeting up in the first place!"
He keeps speaking as if I didn't say the last part, "Why did Rima know then?"
"How do you know I told her?"
He rolls his eyes, "Oh so your best friend would just become your best friend again? Rima doesn't befriend easily, she came to America to find you because you were the one that broke her cold wall. Those walls went up immediately after you left, and no one can break them again. Except you."
Something snaps inside me, I never knew I caused pain for anyone I left. Didn't you leave because you couldn't deal with the pain when Ikuto left you? Gods, my mistake...I have to apologize to her…she even came to America just for me!
"Don't bring Rima into this."
Silence greets us. Yipee. He points to a nearby bench and we sit down, this is gonna take a while…
"So Amu, why'd you leave Japan?"
I hiss, "Why do you think?"
"Because I left you." he said it so quietly I had to lean in the hear it. Each word was coated with a thick layer of guilt, like he was truly sorry for what he did.
"You said you'd be back," I whispered, "So I waited. Three years. I rejected everyone, I waited, and I still am."
I bit my lip, trying to keep tears from falling.
He finally looked at me in the eyes, "I was hoping you'd find someone else. Or at least wouldn't kill yourself waiting for me. I thought it was for the best. But guilt ate me away, still. So I went back to Japan last year, you weren't there. Instead, your friends yelled at me." He gave a humorless laugh before continuing, "Rima told me she thought you went to America. So we both came here, hoping to find you." he gave me a smile, "Rima went through a lot, thank her."
A tear slipped out of my eye, "You think I didn't go through a lot? Everything was a constant memory of you. I stopped trying in school, stopped eating, blocked out everyone. My parents moved me to America, and it helped. But I'm never going to be the same."
I noticed that I stood up while speaking, ready to walk away. Ikuto's still sitting, avoiding my glance. I turn around to see people around us staring. A live, dramatic love story right in front of you, pssh. But still: Eavesdroppers.
"Amu-" he reached his hand out to me but I slapped it away.
"Thanks for inviting me, or maybe the other way around, but I'll be leaving now." I walked away, trying to block out the constant callings of my name. You still have to do a project with him. And he's not gonna just leave the school. I really hate how I argue with little voices inside of me.
"Amu." His hand grabs a hold of my wrist. I try to shake away but he's always been stronger than me. I knew we should have just continued as normal classmates. At least I wouldn't have to go through this.
"I want to forgive you." I murmur without turning to look at him, "Especially since now I know I did the same thing to Rima. But when I remember how I felt, I just can't. We'll just be classmates. Like we had no past." He grip loosens and I'm about to walk away when his hands move to my face and kisses me. I ignore the squeals in the background and kiss him back. I don't want to, but a part of me has wanted this for years. His lips are soft against mine, just like they were years ago on my cheek. He breaks away, his hands on each side of my shoulder. I give him a sad look in the eyes, turn away, and leave. It's like my bodies functioning by itself. I don't want to leave. I want to run back to him and scream that I missed him and I want him to be with me now and…I just want to stop fighting, even if it meant forgetting the past. And maybe that's how it'll be, because this time, there's no one calling me back for another explanation.