OH. MY. GOSH. (that's how I started my updates every time)
Y'ALL ARE SO AMAZING!
3 reviews so far and all super positive! YAY! *happy dancing like a loony*
Ok, so like I said, I would respond to y'all if you wrote me something ... so here it goes!
cforbes12 - I am not quite sure what you mean. BUT FIRST OFF THANK YOU! :) Second, if I am correct, I think you are talking about the sequel to this story. I, unfortunately, had a lot of trouble with that. HOWEVER. I am not changing anything major, I am just rewriting them to strengthen the vocabulary and change a few things here and there that were REALLY rough. Have no fear though, that story should be up in about a month. :) THANK YOU FOR REMEMBERING ME AND STICKING WITH MY OH MY GOODNESS I JUST WANT TO HUG YOU!
Suzee18 - I CAN'T WAIT FOR YOU TO READ MORE! YAY! I love them, too :) READ AWAY!
MiaBelles - YOU WERE THE FIRST REVIEW OF THIS STORY YAY! I hated writing that chapter because of Prim. There are a few more flashbacks with her coming up in future chapters... so eh... i know :( OH IF YOU WANT PEETA BACK... ALMOST THERE!
Thank you to everyone who followed and favorited this story, I see y'all and I am so happy you like this story! Thank you so much and I hope y'all love this chapter. I know this is slow, but it gets really good!
ANYWAYS! YOU KNOW THE DRILL! READ AWAY MY LOVES!
(I do not own THG)
STAY BEAUTIFUL!
-AB
I can hear the wisp of my fan above me spinning in nauseating circles, and the timely tick of my clock on the wall. White noises that are not meant to be heard. Ugh. It has been a week since Dr. Aurelius' visit, and I am still in bed sick. I now have a cough, stuffy nose, and a small fever. My nose feels like someone shoved cotton balls up there. Gross. I shiver and roll over in my bed. As I stare blankly out the window I can see snow falling and not a drop of sunlight peeking through the clouds. I sigh. I officially hate the snow. I know by the way its falling that it will fall for a while, leaving the ground smothered in snow. No matter where I go, escape the clutches of snow seems to be impossible.
I still haven't heard anything about him. I haven't seen him, and he hasn't come to see me. However, he has never failed on making sure I have fresh bread every day. What is his angle of play here? Is he not programmed to kill me? Maybe that has passed but that doesn't change anything. His old self has vanished, just like the sun on this frosty day. Even Haymitch said 2 days was all he needed. It turns out that I was too ill to be coherent and visibly unstable. So more time was needed. Needed for what? Is he even in the district? Probably not. He just sends the bread from his perfect life in the Capital. Wait. Nothing is perfect about the Capital, not even now. Where is he? My thoughts are interrupted my banging around downstairs. Most likely Haymitch. My guessing seems to be right on target as he stumbles into my room.
"Good afternoon sweetheart." He smirks. Wait, its afternoon? "I think it would be good if you and I had a little chat. So come on out of bed and we shall go for a walk."
I do not want to go for a walk, and I do not want to get out of bed. What is it that is so important that he has to drag me out of bed to talk to me? Reluctantly sliding out of bed, I put on a pair of black pants, and a grey long sleeve shirt. Haymitch is outside waiting for me already, so I quickly throw my coat on and make my way down the stairs ready to get this over with. I slide my hunting boots on that are by the door and enter into a world that would look like pure white bliss to the normal eye, but it is like pure white torture to me. I shrug past him and began to walk towards who knows where. He catches up with me and we walk in silence for a few moments.
"Katniss. You know he is here, right?" Haymitch asks in a small voice.
HA. I knew it.
"Well, now I do."
"You need to see him."
"Why?" I scoff.
"You know why. That boy deserves so much more credit than what you give him. He has been through the fire Katniss, and not the fire that has followed you everywhere you go." He spits. What did he just say?
"Do you think I asked for this? Do you think I asked for everything that I held dear to me to be ripped away from me? Do you think…" I scream and then I cannot finish because my body is attacked with coughs. My head is pounding, my vision is blurred, and I start to lose my balance. My surroundings begin to spin and I lose my sight on the horizon and feel my hand go to my head. Note to self: screaming is a very bad plan to get a point across. I close my eyes for just a few moments, and take a few deep breaths. I will not allow myself to falter now, because this is the first of fresh air that I have tasted in a week and a half. I hadn't realized that I was gripping Haymitch's shoulder for support, and what surprised me most, that he has grabbed my arm and would not dare let me fall.
"Katniss…" his voice is full of worry and exposed nothing but fear. I open my eyes and the world is straight again. He gently lets go of me to test to test my stability. Apparently I passed because I am still standing. "Katniss, I didn't bring you out here for this, okay? I wanted you to get some fresh air and just let you know that you should see him, all right?" Again with the Katniss and being completely serious.
I don't know what to say, so I just nod. But I know I won't see him. I don't blame him if he doesn't want to see me. Why would he? He is programmed to kill me. Haymitch slowly walks me back home. We didn't go very far due to my sickly episode, but as I walk up my front steps I see Greasy Sae with a worried look on her face, but her hands on her hips. The world begins to spin again and I trip up a step, and thankfully she is there to catch me.
"Try not to trip up the stairs sweetheart." Haymitch says sarcastically. Again with the sarcasm. They both help me take my coat and boots off, leaving them by the front door where I always keep them, and walk me up the stairs to my bedroom like a child. I slide into bed with a moan. I have got to get out of here. I cannot stay here in this room locked up like an animal. I need some real fresh air. So tomorrow, I'm going to the woods.
"Katniss, you are to stay in bed until this sickness has passed. You will obey no matter what anyone says." Sae's voice is rough but kind. How do these people do that? I can tell she is giving Haymitch a look and he is shrugging his shoulders. Typical. She tucks me in and they leave quietly, and I smile when I hear Sae scolding Haymitch for bringing me out of bed to early. But that doesn't matter now, because in the morning, I am going hunting.
That night, my dreams are haunted with Cinna being beaten because of me and I am chained against a tree in the arena watching him die, and being able to do nothing. I am helpless. I try to squirm free but every move I make results in a lash across his flawless back. He looks up at me with those big brown eyes that were part me in my dreams. I try to turn away as the whip him one last time, but I wake up screaming and sweating just in time to escape his death. I look outside the window and the sun is creeping its fingers in the sky.
"Now I should go." I say to myself.
I strip myself of the silk nightgown that clings to my curves, slide a sweater over my head, pants over my shaking legs, and wool socks onto my freezing feet. The need to escape the teetering grief inside grows with every passing moment, willing me to stretch beyond the limits that I have been given. Who cares anyways? He wouldn't dare come within a hundred yards of this house because the memories that conceal it are triggers for the monster that threatens to return. He hates what he has become, that I can confirm, but his intentions are as clear as the smoke from the bombs that destroyed my home. Our home.
The warmth and familiarity of my father's hunting jacket is spreads comfort through my bones, suddenly giving me the feeling that I am not alone. It has been nearly seven months since I have laid hands on a bow, but that shouldn't make much of a difference due to the fact that archery runs through my veins like a wildfire. The stairs creek in the chilly air beneath my feet as I make my way to the kitchen to grab some breakfast. A cough rumbles through the core of my chest and my lungs feel full of sickly adherent. Being the stubborn one, I elect to ignore it.
I snatch an apple out of the fruit bowl that sits idle on the island in my kitchen and take a bite. The sweet taste is absorbed by the buds on my tongue and I melt with its flavor.
Wait…
Apples are not in season.
My suspicion increases, but not enough to make me toss the apple aside. I know he brought them here, what he is playing at stumps me. Why? What does he want?
I knot the laces of my boots quickly not willing to waste another second of precious time. I slip the one-shoulder sweater on and slam the door behind me before I get caught or change my mind. The snow crunches beneath my tread and the first signs of dawn are announcing the suns arrival.
Oh no you don't.
My step quickens and my eyes stay to the ground, ignoring the pain and death that surrounds me. Buildings burned, homes destroyed, everything – gone. I will not allow myself to falter today, I have a chance to be free and I am going to take it. Relief floods my body now that I have made it to the fence; however, the flu was not as kind and willing considering I had to stop due to the wretched cough.
I glance over my shoulder to see if a follower has decided to join me. It is a silly thought since no one really lives here. Old habits die hard. I slither under the fence and make my way to the old log where my bow and arrows (I pray) are still hidden in the safety of its original splendor. A rush of adrenaline fills me when the bow connects with my fingers. I slide them out of the log and swing them over my shoulders. Who knows, maybe Sae will be please to having something to cook with rather than just the supplies that comes from the Capitol.
I find myself heading towards the rock Gale and I would share before we began our hunts for the day. Back then, everything seemed so simple, but who knew freedom had much too high a cost?
As the sun ray's dance on my face, the freezing air begins to fade and I feel the earth come to life. I breathe in, and cough out of course, but I am finally ready to hunt again. I stand from my perch and head into the woods, bow and arrow in hand.
My eyes drift from the corners that I can see to find any sign of life, and when I spot a squirrel, a small smile creeps on my face as the arrow flies from my fingers.
Except for one thing…
I missed.
How could I have missed! I never miss! Hold on, just calm down. Maybe warming up would help me? Oh the heck I know. I snatch the knife out of my game bag and carve a target on a nearby tree. The sweat of a fever is playing at the nape of my neck and I know that it would probably be best if I head back now. Haymitch and Sae are probably having a fit in realizing my absence. But what do I care? I need to be out here. I survey my work and give a satisfied, curt nod and spin on my heal. Suddenly, I am looking up at a canopy of trees. How did that happen? I must have tripped. When I sit back up, it takes everything in me not to vomit, so I decide that the best place to be is lying on my back in the cold snow.
Vertigo.
I have heard of this before, and seen it in the patients my mother used to tend to. Dizzy spells attack them and moving is not an option. Some are so dizzy that they vomit constantly if they move. The world spins and in order to tend to it, my mother would gently move their heads side to side and in different positions. The inner ear crystals in the fluid is out of balance and the only way to get it back to normal was to manipulate the head in all different directions.
There is just one problem.
My mother isn't here.
I guess I will lay here until it passes some because there is no way I can go on like this. I cannot even see straight. Oh, Haymitch is going to give me an earful for this one. No doubt. Another round of rib-racking coughs invades my air supply and I have lean on my side to my lungs of mucus. Brilliant.
By midafternoon, I have no other choice then to force my body to cooperate and get back home before I am left out here to freeze or be eaten. I stand slowly with the aid of a tree branch and pleased to find that the vertigo has subsided substantially for now. However, moving fast is my clear priority right now. I make it back to the log with very little trouble, but dark snow clouds have covered the suns delightful glow and threaten to burst at any moment. By the time I reach the edge of the woods, the vertigo has returned with vengeance and snow is doing what it does best. Fall.
"Come on, Katniss. On your feet!" I growl to myself. But I can't. I just can't. With every once of energy I have left, I crawl towards the fence, hacking and coughing the entire way. My muscles scream for rest, my head pounds, the world is spinning, my lungs crave warm air but I am nothing. I have nothing left. I am empty. Within ten feet of the fence, I collapse in the snow yet again. I hear my name repeatedly, but I am willing to give up right here, right now. The grief, the death, everything I have suffered will be over in just a moment.
My name grows louder and I hear the faint sound of hustled footsteps. I figure looms over me just before blackness encases me in its depths.
My eyes are heavy and weak. They won't open on command and my head hurts worse than it did before. Someone please tell me how I am so sick! Finally my eyes beginning to cooperate and they open to reveal my room around me. My feet are nice and warm and I'm positive the temperature in my feet matches the one in my head. My throat feels like I am swallowing glass and my body aches. This has got to stop. I look over in the right corner of my room and see Haymitch looked at me. Well, looking very angrily at me. Sae is at the foot of my bed just studying me, pondering what she will say next. However, against my better judgment, I am the first to speak.
"I had not choice Haymitch. I had to go out there. That is the only place where I can actually process my life of the past two and a half years." I say softly, because if I had used more effort, it most likely would have sounded more like animal noises rather than words.
"Katniss, you have got to stop laying in the snow. It is not good for you." He smirks. I know he is still serious though, because he used my first name.
"Haymitch is right girl. Enough. You cannot get better if you push yourself too far. Now it is going to take twice as long for you to recover." She says. Since when does she agree with Haymitch?
"Look, I am sorry you have to keep carrying me up the stairs but I-"
"Oh, I didn't carry you this time sweetheart." Haymitch says cutting me off. I look to Sae, and she shakes here head. Could it be? I stiffen, and a shiver runs up my spine. How could it be? No. It can't be. Could it? He would never do that, would he? These questions swim around in my already aching head.
"If you didn't… then who did?" the answer is one I am certain I know, but completely terrified to hear. Haymitch nods his head to the left back corner of my room and out of the dark shadows, appears the boy with the bread with his bright blue eyes staring right at me.
"Hello, Katniss."
*GASP*
I wonder who that could be? *wink wink*
Okay, so here is what is happening. I decided to have Peeta show up in a different way than what is in the books. Sorry. I HAVE A PLAN!
I will update tomorrow because I have nothing to do and I am super excited for you to read this upcoming chapter because of the everlark feels!
ANYWAYS!
Leave me a little note, and I'll respond! :) Even if you already have done so, I'll still respond because y'all are awesome!
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LOVE Y'ALL :) see ya tomorrow!
- AB