Hi guys! I'm so sorry it took me such a long time to upload this chapter! Life has been crazy, and I hope I'll upload the next chapter within the next week. I've got it planned out!

Special shoutout to Alex, who's the person that keeps you guys from reading some horrible mistakes:)

Disclaimer: You know this part, right?

It's been such a long time since he's been in the loft. He recognizes his house, but he knows something has changed.

"So, how does it feel?" Kate asks teasingly.

"How does what feel?" Castle answers.

"Finally being able to drink coffee again. Do you want a cup?"

"I thought you'd never ask. Oh, and you'll only owe me 99 cups of coffee!" She pats his shoulder and walks over to the kitchen counter. He walks towards the couch and sits down.

It's strange for her. She's finally going to drink coffee again. But she didn't miss the coffee. She missed him. She missed the way his eyes lit up every day they woke up together. She missed the smell of coffee and Castle in the morning. But he's here now. So she'll make him coffee. To remind herself that he is here.

Castle interrupts her thoughts. "How have the boys been?"

"Ryan has been busy being a dad and Espo… Well, let's just say ours is not the only wedding we'll be attending." She says, raising her eyebrow.

"Really?! Lanie and Espo are back together? Finally! Tell me everything about it. Every single detail. From the moment I left until now."

They both keep calling his disappearance 'the moment he left'. It's just easier to think of it that way.

"Well, first of all, they missed you. A lot." Beckett says while she walks over to him with two cups of steaming coffee in her hand. She has a serious face and he knows she has a hard time talking about that period, like him. The only difference is, she knows what has happened to her in the past two months, and he doesn't have a clue.

Kate continues, "I had a lot of help in the first week. Everything about the wedding had to be canceled, the investigation, I just didn't know where to start. Also, I wasn't in the best state to handle such things. So, Ryan, Espo, Lanie, Martha and Alexis helped me and each other."

He can see she is having a difficult time talking about this, so he doesn't interrupt her. He just looks at her, puts his hand around her leg for comfort, and he listens.

"Together, we took care of all the big things and we saw each other 24/7. Jenny brought dinner to my apartment, which was where we did all the work, every night. After a while, they all went home in the evening. Jenny took Kevin home, Martha and Alexis went to the loft and, apparently, Javi and Lanie went home together too. They're not officially engaged, but I know it's coming soon."

Castle had stopped listening the moment Kate told him about the fact that she didn't go with Martha and Alexis.

"Why did you stay?" he asks.

"What do you mean?"

"You said everyone went home at night, but you stayed at your place? Why didn't you go with Mother and Alexis?"

She swallows and ducks her head. When she talks, her voice is soft.

"I couldn't do it."

"You couldn't do what?"

"Damn it Castle! I couldn't go home. I couldn't go to a place where everything smelled like you, where everything reminds me of you. I couldn't go home if you weren't there. Don't you understand? I thought I'd never see you again. Do you really think that I could sleep in our bed? Do you really think that I could wake up every day and face Alexis? She blamed me, Castle. I blamed myself!"

"Kate…" he says as he tries to come closer. She doesn't let him. She gets up and stands in front of him.

"No, let me finish." She takes a deep breath and continues.

"I blamed myself. I thought that your kidnapping had to do something with Bracken. I thought he wanted to take his revenge. I thought he wanted to kill you to get to me. So yeah, I blamed myself. That's why I couldn't stay at the loft."

During her rant, Castle had stood up. He's now just standing there, looking at her, not moving. He had been selfish. He hadn't even asked her how she had been the past two months. He hadn't realized how hard this must have been on her. He had taken her for granted and he's only realizing it now.

He has been a selfish asshole ever since he got back.

"Kate, I am so sorry. I've been selfish, only thinking about me. I have no idea what you have been through and I want to know. So please, forgive me for being the jerk that I am."

"Shush, Rick. We've both been through a lot. I'm just happy you are back."

"I'm happy to be back."

They both sit down without saying a thing. They just settle in, Kate leaning against Castle. He puts his arms around her and after a couple of minutes he realizes she has fallen asleep.

He just looks at her and hopes he gets to wake up to that face for the rest of her life.

"Staring is creepy, Castle"

He smiles.

She's back.

When they go to bed, Kate realizes she barely has any of her things at the loft

"Rick, can I borrow a T-shirt and a pair of boxers?"

"Just like the good old days, of course."

"Oh, shut up."

They brush their teeth together and share glances through the mirror. It really is like the good old days. The days where they had to hide everything from everyone. The days where the secrets were part of the fun. Now, their relationship is part of the fun, among other things of course.

Both Beckett and Castle know they are alone in the loft, but they both don't want to make the first move. What if the other one isn't ready? Kate has no idea what he has been through, hell, he doesn't even have an idea what he has been through.

For tonight, it is enough to sleep in the same bed again. For tonight, it's enough.

You're back. You don't know where you are, but the noises around you are clearer. You hear breathing, cars, water, and voices. As you try to move, you realize the box is really small. 'Don't focus on the small box, don't focus on the small box with little oxygen' is all you can think. You try to focus on something else, you choose the voices. You can't quite understand what they are saying, it sounds like they are talking another language.

When the voices come closer you realize they are talking English, but with heavy accents. You can't quite place the accent but you're hearing some French and Russian in there. 'Weird combination', is all you can think. As you focus on the voices, you can hear what they are saying.

"Is he ready?" The French man.

"He needs one more taping, but then he's ready." The Russian man.

Right now, it's not the box that terrifies you. It's the unknown answer to a very important question:

'Ready for what?'

As always, let me know what you think!

Love, Emma