First off, I own…. I own…. I own… I own… I own… totally nothing of it! Gash that was sooooo difficult to admit :' ( I'll survive over the shock.

Then I would like to thank my new fabulous betareader Denise! She's doing so wonderful job at betareading that story and now she re-betaread these first two chapters. Now I expect you are here for the story itself, not my babbling so please go ahead and keep reading!

Way to the dark 2

Severus was subconsciously holding his breath when he stepped inside the castle doors. Once inside, he realized that he had been holding it, and let it go.

The castle hall was empty, and the stone floor made his footsteps echo while he tried to keep up with Professor McGonagall, who was marching rapidly across the hall to the door opposite of them.

Even through the closed doors, he was able to hear all the noise that kids were making on the other side. Severus dreaded the moment when they would all set their eyes on him, and he knew that it was likely to happen since he was tardy. He hoped that Professor McGonagall would slow down so it would take more time to reach the doors, but he had no such luck. It seemed that the closer they came to the doors, the faster the professor started to march. Severus had to nearly run just to stay behind her. Once they finally reached the high door, he gulped.

Professor McGonagall opened the door and everything was just as he had imagined it to be. There were at least three hundred students in the hall--from what he could see­­--and just as he thought, all of them were staring at him with curiosity. His cheeks began to burn, and he immediately found floor very interesting… His legs felt like they were rooted to the floor; he wondered if his legs were going make it without buckling.

Severus could see the teachers sitting at the elevated table at the front of the room. Above all was Headmaster Dumbledore, who had just ended his speech by saying, "Dig in," and greeted all the newcomers with his twinkling eyes and called him and Professor McGonagall to the front of the room.

Severus forced himself to move his legs. While he was moving forward, he concentrated intently on not looking around, as he knew that he was being watched by everyone in the room, which was something that he didn't like. Nevertheless, he put on a solemn expression and kept walking. At least he would at keep his dignity, if nothing else.

Finally, they all reached the teacher's table, and before he knew it, he was being led to a little stool, which he sat down on obediently. He trembled behind his calm facade when he saw the headmaster approach him, clutching a huge leather hat in his hand, which the headmaster then lowered onto his head. Usually, Severus was an expert at keeping up his facade, but he was visibly startled when he heard a voice within his head. A cold shiver went down his spine when he realized it was the hat that was speaking to him.

The hat started telling about his cunning and his ability to keep his feelings hidden from other people's sight. He wondered if he had imagined hearing a sad tone in the hat's voice while it said this, but he quickly forgot it when the hat began considering which House the would sort him into. The hat told him the Gryffindors would eat him alive the moment he step foot among them.

Supposedly, he had enough will to prove that he did not belong in Hufflepuff, and that he might fit into Ravenclaw house, but still he'd do the best in Slytherin.

"Slytherin!" The hat yelled the last word, and Severus' ears rang for some time before his hearing returned to normal.

He was still dazed when McGonagall directed him to the table with green decorations. After he had made his way to the table, he tried to look for a quiet place at the end of the table, as he usually did at his Muggle school. Nevertheless, there was no such a place available. He had to decide whether to sit next to a few chatterboxes or a blonde-haired boy that was eating silently. Needless to say, choice between jabbering dunderheads and a quiet dinner was an easy one; he took a seat next to the blonde. The rest of the meal went peacefully, with Severus sharing a few words with the blonde beside him. He learnt that the boy's name was Lucius Malfoy, and that he was from one of the oldest pureblood families. Once Severus heard this last piece of information, he couldn't suppress his smile no matter how much he tried. Lucius noticed the faint smile on his new friend's face, and wondered why Severus was trying to hide it from him.

The room became noisier, and when Severus took a look around him, he saw why. Everyone had already finished eating and were now chatting. Headmaster Dumbledore soon noticed that everyone was done, and stood up for a final speech. It was a boring speech about how strenuous the train trip must have been and especially now after eating he expected everyone to be tired. He called for the Prefects to lead all the newcomers to their dormitories, and then he finally dismissed the entire room.

Looking around, Severus saw a tall boy with a shiny green and silver badge on his chest standing and calling the first years to gather before him.

He didn't want to be first one, and he decided to wait for a minute before getting up. He was last in the line once they got to moving, but that was what he had hoped for. He also saw that Lucius was following a Prefect a little ahead of him. What astonished him was how they were leading everyone downstairs to the dungeons, as opposed to upstairs like most of the other Houses. Severus realized it was cold down there, so he wrapped his cloak more tightly around himself to stop shivering. The corridor they walked through was dark, and only a few torches lit it up here and there. But, he liked it like that; somehow it was his style… except that he would have liked it a little warmer. Severus hoped that their rooms would be properly warmed up.

Finally, they reached a portrait that set its eyes dismissively on the group of students the moment it saw them. The portrait inspected them for a minute before it gave a little nod, still keeping its expression rigid. It seemed he had given his approval of them. Now, the man in the painting was staring at them expectantly, so their Prefect said, "Pureblood." It must have been some kind password, for the painting move aside and revealed a big room behind it. Although he already guessed it was their password, the Prefect confirmed this just a few seconds later. The older boy then commented on how late it was, and showed them their bedrooms before retreating to his own room.

Severus could see that all the others in the room were all tired, except for him. He simply had too much on his mind to sleep. Still, he pretended to be tired just because he didn't want others to know that he was still up; he didn't need others to disturb his thinking. At home, he would have gone to his own room and locked it. He also would have played some music so that nobody would disturb him while he was trying to relax; most of the time Metal music. It was always somehow so comforting for him to be able to release some of his own feelings when nobody else could hear him… not that he would do it here with three other kids around him. He guessed that he would need to try to find a safe and peaceful place here at Hogwarts later, but for now, this was all that he had.

He undressed and changed into his new pajamas that he had bought for the school year. When he was finally settled on his bed, he wondered if the other three students in the room were already sleeping. Luckily, everyone had been so tired that they hardly spoke at all, though it would surely be differently tomorrow. When he was sure that everyone else was sleeping, he allowed himself to relax and let his thoughts fly.

X X X

He wondered where his hopefulness had disappeared to. Usually, it would quickly return though, so he wasn't too worried about it. Even so, he couldn't help but dread the coming days. This was just his first day and it didn't go that well.

Those few clowns on the train, they were just cowards. All the people that used to behave that way to him were just cowards. They did everything they could to him without getting caught. Only the threat of being caught was what kept them from doing anything that would physically hurt him or would get them in serious trouble if they were to be caught. There wasn't much to report anyhow. The teachers would just say that it was a normal bantering and shouldn't been taken seriously.

His teachers had never realized that it wasn't just a few jokes. If they'd ever treated him as regular student, but no­­--he was just something to be forgotten. It was painful to be ignored all the time. Personally, he thought that the teachers were powerless to help him, and that that had been only reason why they didn't try. Anyhow, nobody would make fun of him as long as any teacher was around; their behavior would be more subtle. Of course his "classmates" wanted to keep their noses clean…not that it made it easier for him. He wasn't the type to complain if it wasn't absolutely necessary. He never told anyone about what was going on, because it would only make the situation worse for him.

This wasn't the only reason he kept this information for himself– it was a matter of dignity. Do not show weakness in front of others. So long as nobody knew, he was a winner. They could never break him.

He would have been alright, if practical jokes were all that happened; that he could take well enough. But being alone… it was something he could barely handle. Nobody would speak to him voluntarily, even during classes. He was always last person without a partner when the teacher asked the students to work in pairs. Many times, the teacher just added him onto different groups; maybe the teacher was hoping people would get familiar with having him around, but it never worked. They would only ask essential things about the exercise, but never anything else. Even silence was better for them than having to speak with him. Everyone would be relieved once the pair work was over; including himself.

He was sure the teachers knew about this, but they couldn't do anything about it. Maybe they thought he was just too shy to speak with people. Even though he knew that was partially true, it wasn't the whole truth. People didn't want to speak to him, but really, he had gotten used to it a long time ago and didn't even try anymore. Some thought of him as a freak (surely because of his magical outbreaks). Unfortunately, these very same people were the ones who were being abusive--verbally and physically. Other kids feared to befriend him because they would became teased, as well. Then again, one group annoyed him the most--the ones that pitied him. It was obvious from their "secret" looks that they would give him when they thought he wasn't looking.

Severus realized how off-topic he had become from his original thoughts. Even so, the question remained; where had his hope gone? None of the things people did to him ever annoyed him--or so he told himself. He knew that everything was going to be the same as it always was; he was going to let everything seem as though they never happened at all. So that's what he did, once he got the chance to calm down and think the events through in his head, afterward.

Even the few "friends" he had occasionally were nasty to him. Sometimes he was actually mad enough that he though he would give up on them, and sometimes they really did hurt his feelings—more or less purposely—and he never said anything to them. Often, he would give some excuse at the moment and go about playing as if everything was all right so long than they were around. But once alone, at his own home, he would let it out. At these times he was determined that he would leave his false friends behind…But wait for a new day, and guess what? Once they called he was always happy to join them.

It was always like that. That happened way too often, especially if there were some other people around them, and somehow he accepted this as an excuse allowing them to do so. He thought of one of them as a friend; the others only made things difficult for him. Even his friend wouldn't be so nice with to him anymore if others were around. But he was ready to take it if it meant even any company. Some company shouldn't have been too much to ask for; it was the one thing that kept him going, life bearable, and worth of living.

He only accepted all of his "friends" mistreatments to maintain his dignity. He wouldn't complain; he wanted every person, especially adults, to think that everything was all right with him, even if it wasn't.

Severus knew that he had to try again; in the end there weren't many chances to get to know people during the first day at school. Nobody would think he was odd because of his magic, so who knew if things would get on well at this new school.

He was way over the fact that he wasn't privately at home already. Only thing that his brain registered at the moment was that he was safe at bed and usually that was a private place. So it was too easy to let himself to cry at the moment. It was beyond his imagination that somebody might have heard him. Finally he fell asleep.

He was heard. Someone heard not only his crying but his already wheezing breath. That someone came to check on him, and glanced at his tearful face though the bed curtain. He was already asleep when it happened. He would have never have forgiven himself if he had known, but luckily, this was not the case.

X X X

Lucius crept back to his bed, silently wondering why Severus was so sad. He was still tired so he fell back asleep just minutes later.

The room finally quieted down, except some quiet snoring here and there.

It would be quite silly for me to ask you to review just now as there is plenty other chapters ahead for you. I do hope you are enjoying my story so much that you would like to read the next chappy : )