Author's Note: Second to last chapter! I really have nothing to say except that I hope you enjoy and keep reading until it's finished.
"No. Don't do this… Please, John… John!"
His breath lightened and his body went cold. I hugged him against my chest as the tears fell down my cheeks. My best friend had just killed himself and it was my fault. Why did I have to fall? Why did I wait so long to come home? Why did I leave John?
John… My John…
Moriarty. Moriarty made me do it. I hate him.
I stood up and kicked the table, knocking over a chair, and ran my hands through my hair. I wanted to tear it out.
Lestrade tried to calm me down. I screamed at him, telling him to get out. As soon as the door shut behind him, I regretted it. I took a deep breath and looked down at John. I took the gun from my pocket and sat with him, my back against the wall. I pulled him up into my lap and looked down at his face. Kind. Loyal. Intelligent. Brave. Perfect. Everything I could never be.
I cocked the gun and one of my tears fell on John's shirt. I sighed, my breath shaking, and told him everything I never had the chance to before.
More tears forced their way out and ran down my cheeks. I took a deep breath and dried my face with the back of my hands. I leaned down to kiss his forehead and then sat up, looking around our flat for the last time. I looked down at him again before closing my eyes. I raised the gun to my temple, pressing the cold muzzle to my skin, and slowly pulled the trigger.
~Sherlock Holmes