AN: To be frank, I thought that I wasn't ever going to return. But I recently revisited this just out of nostalgia, and now my brain has been lit on fire. Ridiculous. If any one still reads this, I will be utterly amazed.
Disclaimer: Still don't own it.
So it Goes
by: N3L
What happens in the aftermath of Zutara? A Zutara fic. But not for Zutara enthusiasts. A new chapter of her life unfolds as all she ever identified with is out of her grasp. Mai-centric.
Part Four: The Ebbing Tides
Zuko wants to dearly pull out his royal hairs from his royal skull out of frustration while yelling his head off. But instead he settles for organizing the papers he's just received curtly while carefully avoiding eye contact with the many representatives and diplomats seated around him.
Breathe in. Breathe out. In. And out. Innnnnn. Oouuuttt.
When he feels himself respectably calmer and capable of not setting everything within sight bursting into flames, he looks up at the faces surrounding him. They are well aware that this is a touchy and worn out subject, and aren't surprised with his reaction. They are only thankful that he is now better equipped in handling his own temper.
"My Lord, I realize this is an incredibly exhausted issue, but please reconsider. Your people aren't ready for this yet."
Zuko exhales long and loud. This is getting old.
"This is an exhausted issue. Leave my private life out of these matters."
Zuko's face grew grim, and the man was silenced.
"Are there any other issues that need to be addressed?"
"No, Firelord Zuko."
"I see. That will be all for now then, thank you."
They file out one by one. The room is emptied. Now safely enclosed behind the doors by himself, Zuko promptly sags and lets his head drop to the finely lacquered table.
He still wants to pull his hair out, but instead sighs, now drained of energy. He'd overcome so many worse things, played a part in saving the world, but this time, he was starting to doubt. He didn't think being with someone could be this hard. For this long.
He was with Katara now. When he made his decision, he'd figured the world might have some sort of reaction given their public statuses, but he never thought that they would care so much. Or protest. And for so long! This was his life! His choice!
But that's why this was worth it, right? The only things worth having had to be fought for, didn't they?
It felt like the whole goddamn world was against them.
Actually, that's wasn't too far off.
Damn politics. Zuko was the grand Firelord, but he felt powerless at the moment. He wanted to forge his destiny by his own hands. His life. His choices. This was his private life after. But Zuko was quickly learning that his life wasn't only his life, he was the Firelord and it tied him to his people. And that his life wasn't quite so private.
He just wanted to make the world a better place.
This felt trivial. But as he was told again, he position as Firelord was unique. He didn't just ascend to the throne after a long line of successors quietly. He'd played a part in overthrowing his father and the legacy left behind. He served as a symbol, of new beginnings which should've worked in his favor in this. After all, it could be interpreted as two nations coming together, right? But the people were fragile. The Fire Nation's reputation had one hundred years in the making, and the damage was slow to heal.
It'd already been some time since he'd announced his engagement was broken. He hadn't stated the intention to marry again yet, though word had gotten out about him and Katara and all sorts of a small hell had broken loose. All sorts of scandal. People were sticking all sorts of assumptions about his character because of his decision. He was of loose moral fiber, and finicky. Unstable. They were losing faith in him. Everyone knew he'd overthrown his blood predecessors. Now the Avatar's sweetheart? Rumors of his running wild before returning to take the throne circulated. Katara also was facing a similar situation.
He groaned miserably. This wasn't part of the new era of "peace and love' that he so famously coined during his coronation as a boy.
Or...as he'd also heard, maybe there was a little too much 'love' going around.
Ugh.
His friends had managed to wrap their minds around this turn of events. He couldn't deny how painfully awkward and tense it became within the group immediately after. But it dissolved. Sokka had threatened him numerous times, and in many varied and creative ways that he was in no way to harm his sister or suffer the consequences. Ty Lee's smile had grown a little strained around him. Agni. He didn't even want to think about Aang or Mai. He did what he had to do.
He did what was right. The honorable thing.
….Didn't he?
Zuko was admittedly starting to falter. He didn't really know anymore. The grand certainty he felt when he made the decision was slowly being chipped away with every question, 'concern' and look with the passing time. What he did know is that he missed Aang. He saw him rarely outside of anything politically related now. The only instances where it felt like he really saw Aang's physical person up close were in international meetings. Even then, while Aang was just a little out of arms reach in person, his friend felt oceans away. Aang no longer felt like Aang. Aang became The Avatar.
He despised how Aang addressed him by his title or nothing at all even when they were in private. How Aang treated him in those meetings was perfectly polite. But it felt even cooler in demeanor than when he conversed with a representative from some small faraway unknown province. He hated how the quickest way to get Aang's attention was by referring to him by his title. Avatar Aang. The Avatar, also known as Aang.
Zuko had never been forced to choose between the two, but now faced with the reality, Zuko found himself working with a perfectly polite Avatar. Aang no longer smiled at him. Not really. Zuko found instead that he was rewarded with the thin lifting of the lips from the world's peacekeeper.
Zuko wasn't surprised. It hardly meant he had to like it though.
Every time Zuko attempted to talk to Aang privately, he was faced with that thin smile of the Avatar. It made a little part of Zuko fall into old habits; of constant rage, frustration, and self-loathing. He tried gifts. He tried talking to him, brother to brother. But he was being stone-walled with maddening politeness and carefully neutral words. As an Air Nomad, the Avatar did not have need for many worldly possessions, so he politely rejected them. The Avatar always assured him that he understood; he held neither Zuko nor Katara in contempt and to leave it at that.
It twisted his mouth when he thought to the one time they all actually managed to get together, he had looked forward to it stupidly with gusto and even created a little fantasy that it would just be like the old days. Agni. It was amiable, it was enjoyable. But it was lacking. How the room stilled and tensed for a moment when he and Katara arrived and sat down.
And Mai.
Yeah, he really didn't want to think about Mai.
He didn't want to think about how he was lucky enough that she didn't cause a huge fuss when he broke it off. Lucky enough that she left quietly without causing scandal publicly all on her own. That she left quietly. He didn't want to think of how she knew it when he stood before her, struggling to break it the news. The way her eyes dimmed. How she knew him better than he knew himself. He didn't want to think about all the times he knew she was making a special effort for him, she must have felt his growing distance...of the little presents left here and there...the special time she took to prepare his outfit for the day...in helping him dress personally instead of servants. There were too many things he didn't want to think of.
Which is why it was better to have it out in the open, wasn't it? He wasn't going to hurt Mai or Aang for any longer than he needed to. It needed to be done.
It still sucked.
His cheek stung traitorously in memory of the single slap that she delivered him, as Zuko stood fumbling before her. He didn't want to relive how she then seemed to fold into herself and grew silent. Or choking on her stillness. How still she was. How he witnessed something in her break apart, and to know that he was the direct cause for it. Zuko knew her so well, and glimpsed her trembling fingers slip into cascading sleeves and the tightening of her jaw. Her guard came up. More often that not she expressed her anger somehow. But shutting herself off completely? This was the first time he'd ever been confronted with Mai's stony shield. She walled herself off from him. Not a glance, not a single breath in his direction after that.
Mai was never like that to him.
She was many things, but to him, he always felt her genuine sincerity in her emotions, whether good or bad. She could bitch and moan. She could patronize him even, and put him into place when he was being over-dramatic. He expected her to scream and yell and hit him repeatedly. He expected rage. And bruises. He expected her voice run ragged and teeth from lips pulled back in a snarl. But all he got were these silent tears and the echo of her footsteps. The betrayal written all over her face that flashed in an instant. How could you? Her silence rendered him speechless. The Mai that shared all her passions with him was gone, all that she left for him was the red mark on his cheek.
No, he really didn't want to think about that.
As if she weren't far enough figuratively, she literally exited the county to go work at the Jasmine Dragon of all places for uncle. After seeing her last, a part of him was glad that she seemed to be doing well. It took some getting used to to seeing her in green again. It felt unnatural on her to him. Yet he hated how he put off visiting his uncle because he knew she was there. He hated how it felt like he had to chose between seeing his uncle or not at all simply because Mai was there. He didn't want to think about what a coward he was being in this case.
He missed Iroh. The man always seemed to know what to say...
He missed Mai too, as difficult as that was to admit to himself. He'd become so accustomed to having her in his life. So many places in the palace held her memory. He was never too good with his words (or feelings for that matter, but Mai could pick him apart with effortless ease). In addition, all these meetings were a delicate and complicated game of speeches, customs and varied cultural traditions that he stumbled more often than not through. It took a special kind of patience that he was still getting a hang of. He'd gotten much better, but it felt like Mai always knew what to say or what to do. She knew the customs and traditions and guided him through them so that he wouldn't accidentally offend a diplomat from the Earth Kingdom by greeting him with an incorrect hand gesture. Mai could always see through their bullshit and serve it back to them loud and clear all wrapped within perfectly elegant prose.
Mai knew how to do this stuff.
Zuko raised his head and let it drop onto the tabletop again with a dull thud.
Katara was more similar to him than he had realized originally. She attended meetings as a representative from the Southern Water Tribe from time to time as she was always regarded as an important figure, but like him, she too was prone to being stubborn and losing her temper at these meetings. Katara was very passionate, and it was one of the things that drew him to her. As lovely and kind she was with all her good intentions, that heated passion that caught his eye in the first place ran into problems the same manner his own did.
Redirecting lightning or dodging fireballs felt much easier.
He did not move an inch as a knock came from the door.
"Leave me be," he gruffly answered.
"Zuko…"
He relaxed at Katara's voice. "Come in."
They greeted each other with tired smiles and a quick kiss. Katara sat down on the armrest, placed an arm around his shoulder and leaned against him.
"Do you want to go for a walk?" She softly inquired.
Zuko looked at the small warm hand in his, and then peered up into her eyes.
"No, I think I'd rather just stay in here for a bit. I might run into more people outside."
He took Katara's hand for comfort and examined its delicate features. Guilt twisted in his chest as he remembered his doubt from just moments before.
This was right. He threw his life into a mild chaos for this. He caused so much pain. He lost his best friend for this. Yes, this had to be right.
He sighed and leaned into her warmth, letting himself enjoy the sensation of her fingers kneading his temples.
"I'm so tired, Katara."
"I know. I am too."
She smiles at him in reassurance, "We'll get over it." Zuko kisses her in thanks.
The afternoon is warm and the least thing Zuko looks forward to is going over the mounds of paperwork. A selfish childish part of him wished something dramatic would happen just to break the monotony of his days. That little part of him craved for something big to happen. Something to get his adrenaline pumping the way it did when he was a teen racing against time to save the world against all odds.
Zuko would look back at this sentiment with bitterness in the days to come.
The day slowly came winding down and the young Firelord found himself in the library lighting numerous candles to keep his desk alight enough to peer over his unending stack of papers.
He wondered how long it would take nations to heal. For the memories to fade into obscurity, and the Fire Nation to be restored in its former glory in eyes across the world. He was working hard to cultivate peace and harmony.
He was itching for some of his uncle's tea.
A curt knock at the door sounded, and he gave permission for whoever it was to enter. Zuko was surprised to see one of his trusted advisers come through at this hour.
Suspicion rose as Zuko perceived the man to be anxious and incredibly nervous. The man swallowed and prepared himself to deliver what ever news he bore.
Zuko was positive he wasn't going to like what was coming.
"My Lord…I bring tragic news. Please keep in mind that we are currently doing everything we can to rectify the situation."
Zuko's patience was thin.
"What is it?"
"General Iroh seems to be missing, Firelord Zuko. As well as Lady Mai."
The dull monotony of the next passing days was shattered. Zuko was fraught with worry as he repeated what little was known about his Uncle's disappearance. He'd postponed all his scheduled meetings and projects.
They received word by a hawk messenger sent by Toph, saying that something was amiss. The two had been missing for two days before it was brought to her attention that something was wrong. She was already doing everything she could and was searching for clues. The shop has been closed since. Toph came by the tea house midday, and was surprised to see it closed. Finding it odd, it wasn't until she lost her patience waiting around and snuck inside that she discovered the residual signs of a fight scattered across the house. And the unmistakable smells of smoke.
It was all very suspicious and made Zuko tingle with dread.
He'd frantically sent word back but had yet to receive a reply.
Worst case scenario: they were dead. But he refused to even entertain the notion. It was Iroh. And Mai, who was more than capable of defending herself. Together, his council agreed that this felt too uncanny, and was some sort of a threat aimed at him. Was there a rebellion at hand? Was there something deeper under the surface going on?
Zuko didn't know. But it was all very possible. The Fire Nation's past actions had left many enemies, and he knew of people within the Fire Nation itself that were incredibly disgruntled at their current predicament. He wasn't beloved by all his people from the beginning. And he still certainly isn't.
There were too many possibilities. He gripped the message and stared hard at it, running over the words again and again, hoping for some hidden clue to reveal itself.
Despite that some of their valuables were missing, it didn't add up to a looting gone wrong. The signs hinted to a kidnapping. The looting was secondary.
Katara could not quiet his fears. Days passed without any new useful information. Zuko sent out more letters to his friends across the globe to keep an eye out, but so far nothing. Toph managed to track them through word of mouth, but the trail ended cold once it led to a ship at sea. His anxiety worsened at night, the next morning he was determined on setting off to sea himself.
He desperately wrote to Aang of what he knew, and prayed that the hawk would be able to locate him.
Zuko was going take this into his own hands. He was to leave later that day with Katara and a few select exemplary benders.
His plans came to a screeching halt when a message finally arrived on a haggard looking bird.
Zuko nearly tore the letter open in a frenzy desperately hoping for good news. As he read on though, dread pooled in his stomach and his blood pounded in his ears. The letter was simple.
The words were printed with infuriating neatness and precision and stared him in the face:
"We know where he is.
Come out at sea alone,
be warned.
We'll meet."
He crumpled the piece of paper within his hand. By the time he uncurled his fingers, only smoking ashes remained.
Mai was being fed some water. After being so thirsty for so long, she gulped greedily to wet her dry throat before she was gagged yet again with a putrid piece of fabric. She knew that Iroh was on this ship with her somewhere. She had a few theories as to why she was here, and who these people were. But her mind was also getting more prone to wandering due to lack of food, water and proper sleep. The constant pain she was in was faintly maddening. She lost track of time, and guessed a couple of days had passed. She was definitely on a ship. Mai figured that she must have been kept below deck from the muffled noises of the ocean, and the constant clattering of steps over wooden above her.
Her body was getting weak. She was constantly working through her throbbing head, her raw skin pulsed angrily, swollen against her binds and a persistent ache that spread throughout her body. The fabric that gagged her smelled and tasted of old mold. Her shoulders were pulled back and in pain. She recalled that one was probably dislocated. Her back was forced against what was probably the mast. Her skin crawled with the need for a bath, but that was the least of her worries. She was disoriented from consistently being blindfolded. She worried about Iroh. She prayed he was in far better shape than she.
The young noblewoman had long figured out that Iroh was the main target they were after. And that their kidnappers were probably well off before Zuko ascended to the throne. She wasn't sure what they wanted exactly, but she was sure that Iroh was a means of negotiation against the current young Firelord and that she was only so lucky as to get dragged along on the side.
With this in mind, her mind was given a faint relief because she was positive they needed Iroh alive to do any form of negotiating.
…As for her own person though…her future was maddeningly vague. The assurance of her life was not as solid. So far she served as some sort of entertainment from time to time to her captors. They would taunt her from time to time, call her despicable names, and generally harass her for their apparent amusement.
Much to Mai's frustration, she did nothing. She would plan and figure a way out of this mess. She took advantage of whatever damned thing they gave her, be it water or scraps of food and feel the hot pulse of anger in the back of her mind. She needed to stay alive in the very least, to exact her revenge.
For the time being, she slowly and subtly worked at the cuffs that bound her hands when left alone. With a little time she gauged that a good hard yank just might be able to set one hand free. Though it was still questionable, due how her shoulders were bound, and the fact that one of them was dislocated, but she figured it could work. She would make it so.
The ship swayed to and fro. She was at least glad that she was not one to get seasick. Her lips were cracked and her skin itched from dehydration and salt deposits. And her limbs grew numb long ago.
Shouts exploded and filled the air. Hurried footsteps clattered overhead. Mai grew alert and struggled to listen to the freshly born chaos. The two men idly watching her clambered up the stairs. She stilled and listened for a few seconds more. Confident that the chaos would continue for a few more minutes, she took advantage of the distraction and began to madly struggle against her bindings. It took repeated tries, but she forcefully ripped one wrist out of a cuff with low hiss of pain as she was sure she took her skin off. It was a miracle, and she willed her arm to move her through sheer will over the fierce needle pricks of blood resuming it's normal flow. Clumsily she gripped the ropes binding her upper torso with her one good arm and pushed with all her might. It left her winded. She was far from her full strength. Mai gave her arm a shake to wake it up and drive away the feeling of prickling needles. Her ears remained alert on the continuing commotion above her.
Iroh.
The desperation of the situation fed her frenzy and she mustered up every drop of strength and heaved. Mai ended up scraping her face as she squeezed through the tight rope, but successfully shoved it over her head. She quickly rid herself of her blindfold and putrid gag. Next, she felt her other shoulder, and with a grimace reached over and popped her shoulder back into place. It hurt but now at least she regained mobility of her arms however limited. She then made quick work of the ties on her ankles. A quick glance around confirmed that she was below deck in a ship and the window of light above was where all the excitement was.
With a another cursory glance, she found herself fortunately alone and made to stand and get up those stairs. However her legs quickly gave out under her. She smacked at them, massaging furiously, irritated at their lack of response. Impatient with the state of her own body, she fumbled up the stairs while willing the blood to flow to her limbs and waited for her body to regain it's senses.
Peeking just past the exit, she quickly ducked her head as stream of flame passed through. The brightness of day sent her head swimming but her heart jumped with the sight of Iroh giving their captors hell on the other end of the ship. She frantically looked around for something she could use as a make-shift weapon and her eyes alighted upon a heavy metal chain.
It would have to do.
With a new found strength she entered the deck and swung the chain around, testing it's weight before whipping it and hearing the satisfying crack against a helmet. One down.
Her presence was made known immediately and two assailants came at her. Dodging fists and flames, she spun the chain around to keep a distance between her and her opponents. Her body was slow and sluggish from the journey, but Mai gritted her teeth and whipped the chain at the feet of one of them. She missed. The deck wasn't that large and she was limited in space and maneuverability.
She found herself backed against an edge, only wood stood between her and the vast sea. There were many flammable things on the ship, and fortunately, their use of bending was limited. Mai waited for the an opening between their movements before striking again. This time she succeeded but in the split second her victory took place in taking one down, the other fire bender lunged forward as she was preoccupied with the momentum of the chain. She compensated by twisting away, letting him pass by her and struck him in the back with her elbow, sending him tumbling into the sea.
Without a moment to waste, she grabbed the sword off the first fallen man and tied the hilt to her tunic with her sash,. Swords aren't her specialty, but she's familiar enough with them to do some damage. She assessed the situation for a quick second, a flurry of flames were being exchanged at the other end of the ship. She notes that while Iroh's movements are masterful, they mirror hers in being faintly sluggish. Before any more of them realize that she's taken down their men, Mai jumps up onto the mast and positions herself near the sails which are thankfully quite low. From this height, she figures that they would at least hesitate in hurling fire at her and limit their options in attacking, lest they burn the sails along with her. A shadow of an idea crosses her mind, and she makes to cut down the sail, and throw the heavy fabric on the benders down below to temporarily debilitate them. She could make the jump and then take them all out with this chain. If it caught fire and grew out of control Iroh could easily handle it. And if not, there must be a lifeboat around. She scanned around from her convenient height for it before quickly realizing that cutting up the sail was no quick work.
She's spotted.
Two more break off and advance. Getting a better hold of her footing, she swings the chain and aims. Though awkward from this height, her intent is executed without a hitch. One is caught around the neck, she gives a quick jerk before releasing. The man falls, a guttural noise trailing behind. She counts eight more left.
They both need to end this. Fast.
She registers a body fall over board in the corner of her eye due to Iroh.
Seven left, counting the two watching her.
One approaches the mast. The other keeps his gaze fixed on her, and she recognizes him the instant he smiles as the same one in her bedroom that dislocated her shoulder. How satisfying it would be to wipe that smile off his face.
But for now she's preoccupied with the one making his way up the mast. She hoists the chains around her shoulder and secures her hold. She aims to smash his hand with her heel but misses in her limited position. His hand takes hold of her ankle and yanks hard. Mai feels her shoulder scream in protest. She attempts to kick him but he manages to redirect the momentum of her foot with his hand. Gritting her teeth, she lets her entire weight fall and gets him in the face with her free foot before he has a chance to grab hold of it also. The man yells in pain, lets go of the mast but manages to hang onto her foot. The addition weight of his body is too much, the pain in her shoulder floods her. Her fingers give out. She falls down onto him, and smashes him in the the side of the face with her fist twice. His body goes slack.
Mai rolls off him and turns to the the one with the sickly smile.
She unsteadily gets to her feet. The pain in her shoulder doesn't subside. Mai realizes that her right shoulder has been dislocated again from her previous encounter on the mast, and her arm hangs limply at her side. It protests under the weight of the chains, and she lets them crash to the floor. She pops it back into place with a faint grimace, eyes never leaving the man in front of her. That smile mocks her, and she will make sure to take it off his face. She unsheathes the sword.
He does the same.
She makes the first move and swings from her right. He blocks it and they separate. He tries to take her from the side and she dodges. It continues. They clash, she blocks and dodges. Sweat beads and rolls off her temple. She wasn't going to last very long at this rate.
A stream of fire roars by from the opposite end of the ship, and her opponent jumps back to avoid it. She sees the opening in that split second and strikes. She throws the blade and it cuts into his side, but firmly sticks to his clothing, pinning him momentarily to the floor. She rushes forward and aims to kick. He manages to block it, catches her calf, then twists violently and she's loses her footing. Meanwhile the man frees himself and sweeps the floor with a low kick. It connects and Mai is sent careening down. She scrambles to upright herself but is jerked up by her hair then forcefully to the ground.
She sees Iroh rapidly approaching in the corner of her eye as she tries to get up but is slammed back down yet again. Her head knocks against the hard floor and stars explode in her vision. Facing down, a heavy weight is deposited between her shoulder blades. Disoriented, Mai attempts to push off the floor with her good arm yet again but is forced back down immediately.
She hears her name called.
"Iroh -!"
But the air is now crushed out of her lungs, and she can't take a breath in. All commotion has momentarily stopped. Her own ragged breathing fills her ears. It gets increasingly difficult to breathe. A hand circles around her neck.
Iroh stands just a few feet away. Out of breath and still dressed in his sleeping wear which is sullied now. There is a bit of blood on him, old and new. The wind picks up. The retired General sways a little on his feet.
"Not another move," the man threatens.
Iroh stares him down, but does not change his stance. Mai feels the hand on her neck shift down, and a blade comes to rest at her neck. Every breath she takes, metal bites into her skin.
"Back up."
Begrudgingly, Iroh takes a single step back, and Mai strains to see him. A noise is forced out of her as the pressure intensifies over her lungs.
A body stirs in the distance. A groan.
"Get up!" the man commands it.
Iroh turns to the source but is stopped abruptly by the one holding her down.
"NOT A MOVE!"
She hears faltering footsteps now from the same direction of the groan. Mai struggles against the weight, but is crushed down again. The blade bites into her neck. She drags in a long unsteady breath.
The footsteps come closer.
They're at a standstill. Iroh's stance is still up, he slowly takes one more step back while attempting to keep an eye on the new arrival and the blade on Mai's neck.
"Kneel down," the voice above her commands.
Iroh remains on his feet.
"You think I'm kidding? KNEEL DOWN!" he shouts, the weight shifts, and Mai's eyes snap open as a jolt of fresh pain assaults her from the middle of her thigh and shoots through her body. She stiffens and stifles a yell.
Iroh calls out in horror to her.
Mai squeezes her eyes shut as she feels the blade twist in her flesh before being pulled out. The blade returns to her neck, and she sees her blood glistening on it. Seconds pass as she's pinned down. Mai feels herself slowing. She cannot breathe. The adrenaline is leaving her , and the state of her body is overcoming her thinking. Her mind begins to feel warped, and her consciousness heavy. The weight on her back grows heavier, and her breaths come in shaky and shallow.
"Don't test me."
The blade hovers, a deadly promise. Slowly Iroh kneels, the new arrival temporarily forgotten as his eyes remain trained on Mai. Iroh isn't too worried about the new comer, but he isn't willing to risk another chance for Mai. The blade went clean through. He see's that her eyes are beginning to gloss over from the strain, and he also not only saw but heard her head slammed against the floor. She might've been suffering from some head trauma. It was a dangerous thing. He'd seen men die hours or even days later after suffering a blow to the head. A large red bloom is spreading on the leg of her pants. Iroh returns to meet the man's gaze, hard as steel. The man made his point.
Iroh would kneel for now, but his mind was whirling in action. He slowly lifts his hands up in an attempt to appease the man. Footsteps approach him.
"Bind him!" The man leans forward and pushes the blade into Mai's neck for emphasis.
Iroh watches grudgingly. The red begins to pool around her leg.
Iroh suddenly notices something overhead above. A loud resounding whack sounds through the air. An object whizzes by in the air and away into the sky. Iroh follows it and smiles when it reaches it's destination. The man holding Mai down is momentarily disoriented having taken a blow to the head from the object, and Iroh rushes him. A quick burst of flame to the face, with an extra punch and kick for good measure before he bodily throws him off Mai.
A body lands on the ship deftly and takes out the nameless footsteps.
"Iroh! Mai! Are you guys alright?!"
A shadow falls over the ship.
Suddenly free from the oppressive weight, Mai rolls over and takes in a deep breath. She discerns Iroh hovering over her, looking a bit worn. She's only half conscious at this point, and a little confused as to what's going on. Another face joins his above her. Her eyes focus.
Sokka?
Their expressions register slowly through the fog in her mind. Why does everyone looks so worried...? She just wished her body would just stop screaming at her. Her head was ringing. Her vision shifts in and out of focus. ….Well, if Sokka's here, that's good. Her thoughts grow feeble. The pain in her leg overwhelms her as she attempts to move it.
It is so heavy. Everything is so heavy right now.
But there's a curious sensation flowing through her now. A low thrum permeates her body. She thinks that she feels a cool hand on her head. The curious sensation flows. Odd. Not quite pleasant but much preferable to her current state. Even her legs quiets a fraction. An additional voice sounds near her.
She blearily opens her eyes.
Aang.
.
.
.
She takes in another breath.
She sinks. They fade away.
Mai doesn't remember very much after that.
There is a sensation of gravity, of being lifted. Of wind. Of water. Of voices intermingling. It is all muddled sensation. Images flicker in her mind and she dreams, drifting between reality and memory.
The next time she opens her eyes, everything is red.
Familiarly so.
The palace. How?
She swallows thickly and her throat has the texture of sandpaper. Mai then realizes how much her body aches. A groan escapes her throat.
"Oh! You're awake!" A voice full of relief.
She turns her head, and it takes her eyes a moment to adjust. She's surprised to see Katara.
"How do you feel?"
She tries to speak, but only an hollow rasp comes out. Katara brings water to her lips and she drinks.
"How long...have I been asleep?"
"Almost three days."
Mai blinks slowly. Her head is swimming. "...Three days."
"Do you want some more water?"
She squeezes her eyes shut, and hopes her head stills itself. "No..thanks."
"Everyone will want to know you're awake."
"Mmm." Mai groans in bed. The water bender leaves to alert everyone. Her head throbs. She attempts to pick up the pieces. How did she get here? The last thing she remembers in being crushed. Of not being able to breathe. If only her head would stop swimming. She sees iroh's face hovering over her. Iroh. Iroh!
Her eyes fly open and she tries to sit up much to the protest of her body.
Suddenly the room is filled with people, and she is now being ushered back down into bed.
"You need to rest, Mai!"
Zuko's voice registers in her ears.
"Where's Iroh?" She scans the room, thankful that it is not too bright. Zuko, Toph, Katara, Sokka, and Aang surround her bed.
"He's resting. We're doing our best. "
"Where is he?"
"Right here, in a room right next to yours."
"Doing your best?" She squints at Zuko and reads the worry plain on his face.
"Let me see him." She begins to rise from the bed again, only to find herself ushered down again.
She scowled tiredly.
"Please, Mai. Just rest a little more. You can see him tomorrow, it's best not to disturb him right now."
"...fine."
She would visit him later. When there weren't so many people around. At least she knew now. She blinks at all the eyes on her. An feeling of irritation came over. She felt like shit, and everyone was staring so intently. She knew they were all there out of concern but it was making her incredibly self-conscious.
"...I'm alive. Stop looking at me like I'm dead."
"You almost died!" "We're just glad you're okay, Mai." "You scared us, Mai!"
Their words jumbled and overlapped each other.
She frowns. Words escaped her. She peered at their faces and saw the genuine concern etched in them and softens a bit. The irritation melted away.
She sighs. "...Sorry?"
Zuko exhales loudly. "Well, you and Iroh are going to be staying here with me for a while."
"Mmm," she acknowledges.
"You hungry? Why don't we get you something to eat?" Katara offered.
"...sure."
"I'm bringing my dinner in here," Toph declared and also exited the room.
"Thank Agni," Zuko muttered under his breath. " You're awake." He fluttered about anxiously in the room. "Do you need anything? Do you want something to drink too?"
Some privacy. Mai was beginning to feel awkward, back from a brush of death or not. And Zuko wasn't helping. She gestures to the glass of water set next to her bed in reply and realizes the thick bandaging on her wrist.
"How do you feel, Mai? What happened?" crowed Sokka, eyes wide and questioning.
"Are you sure you don't want anything, Mai?"
"Where's that salve?"
"Maybe an extra pillow?" Aang's suggests, as his gaze floats over to her current arrangement on the bed.
"Yes! That's a good idea," Zuko turned, looking for a servant to summon.
"And bring in those medicinal herbs!"
"Um," she attempts.
The three nod exaggeratedly among themselves in discussion like a trio of clucking lizardchickens, deeming it the right course of action. Mai laid there like a sack of potatoes, and for all intent and purposes pretty much felt she was one at this point with the way they were acting.
"Hey," she tries again. Ugh. Her head throbbed.
They come up with more possibilities to improve her current state of being. It was nice that they cared, but all she wants is to really brush her teeth.
"Geez guys, give her some space!," Toph entered the room, a plate in each hand and plopped down on the chair set next to Mai's bed. "You guys can all come visit her again later, but quit crowding. She barely woke up."
The three young men looked at each other, before turning over to Mai. The faint narrowing of her eyes in displeasure greeted them.
"Not dead yet, guys."
Zuko's anxiously begins to pace. He would go forward to peer at her condition, as if checking if she were really there before backing off awkwardly and treading to other end of the room.
Mai furrowed her brow.
"Yeah, you're not helping by going in circles, Sparky."
The Firelord stops, brings his hands up to his hips, lets them hang loose, then settles for crossing his arms. What did he usually do with his hands all the time? He has no idea. He is fuming at the situation, worried, anxious but at very least glad that his Uncle and Mai are here safe now. Right here before his very eyes. He looks at Mai, and sees the discomfort on her face, and grudgingly acknowledges the truth in Toph's words.
"...yeah. Okay. You're right." He pauses, "I'll leave a servant outside your door for now. If you do need anything just give a call," Zuko seems beside himself for a moment, but then departs figuring it was for the better.
Sokka and Aang watch him exit before looking at each other and following suit. "I'll see ya, Mai," Sokka waved at her on the way out.
"Yeah, we'll be back to check up on you."
Toph hands her the plate, and she takes it. Mai studied her plate, gave it a whiff, then realized it didn't matter what it was because she was starving. She went to work on a piece and placed it in her mouth. She made a small noise of approval. Fire nation food by the palace cook...delicious.
The two worked on their plates in silence as the minutes passed.
After her fourth bite, Mai began to feel odd at the fact that she was within the Fire Nation's Palace walls again. She looked down at herself and found that she was dressed in the signature red garb. It gave a similarly strange feeling.
"We got the bastards who did this to you, Mai."
"Yeah." No surprise there.
"You're okay?"
"Fantastic."
Toph made a disapproving face. "Seriously."
Mai exhaled. "I'm fine."
Toph's face doesn't change. "Aang and Sokka told me that you had some wounds when they found you."
Mai tried to recall the past events. It felt surreal. She tried to shift her left leg, and felt a sharp pain radiate continuously. Her shoulders were exceedingly sore. As were her wrists, that were bound tightly in new bandages. Upon closer inspection, she noted they were beginning to discolor. Her list of growing pains. She noted that she was at least clean now. Aside from that, she was sure that she was going to discover more later. She probably looked like a piece of fruit that had been dropped too many times and then some. At least Toph couldn't physically see that.
"I'm a big girl, Toph. I'm fine."
Toph twisted her lips. "We all know you can take care of yourself, Mai. Doesn't mean that we don't worry. You were gone for five days."
It is Mai's turn to disapprove. She scoffs quietly but reaches for Toph's hand and gives it a light squeeze.
Toph returns the sentiment and they resume finishing up their plates, complacent in each other's company.
They talk a little more. Toph helps her on the way to the restroom. Mai relays a little bit of what happened to Toph, but is more interested in pestering her for Iroh's situation but is met with silence, which only serves to agitate her. She tries to get out of bed to see him herself.
The situation repeats itself until Toph finally gives in with exasperation.
"Alright! Stop! Geez, you're going to pop a stitch or something."
Mai settles back down and waits.
Toph's shoulders slump. "Look...physically, Iroh seems to be doing pretty well. Way better than you anyhow. Aang and Katara have worked him over and they can't figure out why...but the thing is...he won't wake up. We were afraid that the same thing was happening to you too."
Toph pauses. "We're not really sure what's going on right now. For now, Katara thinks that there's some sort of poison involved."
Mai feels her innards grow cold. She recalls the slight awkwardness of Iroh's movements on the ship that she attributed to malnutrition. She was mistaken.
Her heart sinks.
She was so close to getting that guy. If only she'd just managed to kick him away properly. If only she'd taken down that bastard proper. Her eyes squeeze shut. It was such a foolish mistake. Foolish and costly.
She lets out a sigh. But it was all done and past. Her train of thinking wouldn't get her any where useful. It wouldn't help Iroh or anyone else.
"Take me to those bastards." It was definitely personal now, and she prayed that the one with the sickly smile was there so she could wring out any bits of information out of him herself.
A week goes by.
Zuko enters the dimly lit room and quietly walks over the sleeping figure, careful to not make a sound. He'd just seen Iroh, but sadly there was no change.
The young Firelord took in Mai's appearance freely from her gaze. He drank in the features that he had known so well; eyed the bridge of her nose that he knew crinkled whenever she took a bite into a sour plum. Zuko took in the bandages and her uneven hair. His brow furrowed, wracked with guilt and worry. He eyed her slender fingers peeking from the ends of her long sleeves. He recalled the raw red on her wrists that shocked him when she first arrived, and gently took hold of her sleeve and lifted it back to reveal the bandages. Guilt flooded through him anew. Those cowards. Those traitorous men ought to have taken it up with him, the Firelord himself instead of bringing Iroh and Mai into this. Despicable.
Absently feeling the fabric of her sleeve, he lost himself in thought. Zuko wasn't quite sure what he was feeling anymore. He lost himself in the sound of her breathing, in the strands of her dark hair. He lost himself in the skin of her exposed forearm. Of her wrists with wounds reopened again and again, and he thinks he heard Katara muttering to herself that they would most likely leave a mark because she couldn't get to them in time. Aang had done quick work with her more serious injuries upon finding her. Any internal wounds discovered after she arrived here were carefully dealt with by he and Katara combined. He frowned to himself.
It had been a while since Zuko had seen Mai with battle damage.
He frowned because he knew that Mai had two vanities, the first being her hair, and the second being her skin. Other than that, Mai did not spend too much time on her aesthetic appearance. She liked her clothing neat and in place. She rarely ever darkened her eyes, or wore rouge on her cheeks or lips with the exception of appearing for public addresses or special celebrations. Nor was she one for jewelry; the only piece of jewelry he'd ever seen her treasure was the ring he promised her and he remembered how it warmed his heart. But Mai always did prefer her throwing knives and small weaponry. "Beautiful and functional," she once declared.
He knew that she was more comfortable in the shade than in the sun. He knew that she liked to feed to turtle ducks with him at the pond. He knew of her attachment to cleanliness and the simple pleasure she took in assembling her weapons side by side at the end of the day. He knew of the luxurious pleasures she indulged in, of fine silks and exotic fruit.
Zuko knew so much of it. So much of her. What was he to do with all this knowledge that he had accumulated over the years? Absentmindedly he trailed a finger along the top of her knuckles, and registered that the cool velvety texture matched his memory.
Zuko wanted to see Mai back to her old self again. Unmarred.
With a jolt he caught himself and retracted his hand. He furtively watched her faces for any changes, and satisfied that there was none exited the room, flustered by his own actions.
.
.
.
Mai is limping around the palace grounds. Injured, but restless. After a couple more minutes of this, she decides to limp her way to the turtle duck pond. She liked the turtle duck pond.
As it comes into view, she sees that it's already occupied. Her heart deflates.
Zuko and Katara look up at her from the distance. He comes over to assist her. Mai limps by him pointedly, without his help. Her crutches will do just fine.
Katara also rises and comes over to her, "Let me check that leg of yours, it's due for another look." The water bender flashes a quick smile at her.
"Aang already checked earlier." A lie. To be honest, she'd been avoiding her check-ups between the two of them by saying one or the other had already checked earlier because...ugh, check ups. Plus, it was rather easy actually, given how Aang and Katara generally avoided each other now.
The younger woman looks at her, hesitant. "I see. He's really thorough, isn't he?"
Mai makes a noncommittal noise in reply. It's obvious that Katara's trying to make peace, and get some closure with her.
It is.
Afterall...she and Katara were friends before. As were their respective ex-boyfriends. Well, they were all friends before.
And Katara's blue eyes are pleading. So full of feeling, despite how she held back. Mai sees it clear as day, quivering behind her irises. It's all too bad though, because whenever Mai looks at Katara she can only see Zuko.
Speaking of Zuko, his Fierieness hovered in the peripheral of the two women, unable to decide whether to leave or stay. Mai can practically feel how he wishes the two of them would get along, even if Mai herself wouldn't talk to him.
It irritates her. Tough luck, Zuko.
However, before Mai can come up with some excuse to dismiss herself, Katara gives Zuko a look, and he obediently leaves them.
Mai resists sighing loudly, and keeps her face stone. Great.
"Mai...can we talk?" Katara gestures to that spot next to the turtle duck pond where she limped in on them. Where Mai herself has become so familiar with since childhood.
"...Please?"
Her sigh escapes. "Fine."
The two settle down in the shade. Katara hands her a piece of bread to feed the animals. Mai tears a little piece off, and preoccupies herself with luring the creatures closer.
"Um..." Katara starts and trails off.
"Mai, I know things are...crappy between us."
Mai raises a single brow. She's already getting bored with this. Another piece is torn off, and the little turtle duck follows it. Mai notes that it's kind of cute.
"...Is there anything that I can do? Anything at all?"
The little turtle duck draws closer still, and Mai is encouraged by it. She tosses another piece to it. All of Mai's attention is put on this little eager turtle duck with great deliberation.
Katara sighs. "Can't you even look me in the eye?"
Mai feels her spirit just...sag before she spares her a glance.
Her lips part to speak simply, "...There's really nothing you can do. I think you've done more than enough." A tinge of regret colors her words.
"Please, Mai. I'm trying."
She pinches the last piece of bread between her fingers, attention returned to the little turtle duck. "Yeah. I know," of course she knows, "But it's whatever, Katara." Her gaze slides over to the girl next to her. Mai looks at the warm hue of her skin and her braided hair. The blue of her outfit that matches her eyes. The things that Zuko chose over her. A part of her feels guilty, but Mai still feels the dull ache of loving Zuko every time she sees Katara. It pushes the words out her throat. "I'm exhausted with this. I don't care that you didn't mean to. I'm tired of this." Katara's eyes dim with disappointment at her implications. Mai can feel her shrivel away at her words.
Mai's lips pull back a bit in displeasure. "I don't hate you, Katara," she turns away with another sigh, "...But even now, I can hardly look at you." That dull ache throbs in her chest.
The water bender sits numbly, bread forgotten in her hands. The turtle ducks exit the pond.
With that, Mai draws up her crutches and leaves. The last crumb of bread hits the water, and sinks down. Mai doesn't have anything else left in her, other than honesty - and its what she gave.
This place is too big. All the giants pillars she passes begin to give her the peculiar feeling that she's in an enormous cage. The whole thing with Katara leaves her feeling heavy. She is tired of this. Agni. She couldn't wait to get out of here. So much of the palace felt like it was mocking her. These columns, these rooms...and the servants. She recognized all of them, and them her. She didn't like the looks they gave her, no matter what colored it, be it pity, or a polite nod, or just an awkward glance away.
Just, ugh.
And she was so bored. Even if there were no annoying customers, or dirty cups, or floors to be swept...she was so bored.
She continues to limp in the direction of the dining area, hoping for a glass of water. A figure emerges from one of the many corridors ahead of her.
"Oh hey, Mai. There you are!"
Sokka trots up to her. "Where you going?"
Mai sighs and continues to limp on. "An adventure."
Sokka rolls his eyes at her sarcastic remark. "But really."
"Thirsty," she supplies perfunctorily.
"Oh. Y'know I could go grab it for you," he looks at her uneven gait pointedly.
"Because I'm just so busy here."
"Well, suit yourself!" He matches her pace.
"...Are you leaving?" She ventures. Almost hesitant.
"...Yeah, I gotta. I mean, the hunting season's here and the tribe's hosting this year. I can't really stay any longer. Katara'll probably have to leave sooner than later too."
Mai nods in understanding, and the two share a quick hug before the warrior departs.
"Get better, Mai! I'm expecting you to kick ass next time I see you!"
A smirk grows on her face as she waves goodbye to him. The gaang's slowly departing one by one as they must return and resume their lives. It fills Mai with dread. The thought of being left alone in this place with Zuko and Katara with Iroh in his slumber is not something she was looking forward to.
She sighs. Again.
She finally reaches the dining area, and a servant fetches her some water. She leans on a column and faces the courtyard. A few minutes pass by, and she finds herself thinking back to Katara. Mai frowns and sips at her drink.
"Mai." Her thoughts are interrupted.
Damn. She was way too easy to catch up to on these crutches. She turns back to see Aang, with an eyebrow raised at her.
"Aang."
His arms cross. The look on his face says that's he's clearly expecting something from her, but Mai only continues to meet his stare. The Avatar walks up to her and regards her manner.
"You haven't had your leg checked for this entire time, haven't you? Or anything else for that matter."
Mai's face is still. "I have."
Aang is not amused. "Yeah, right. I just heard Katara telling Sokka that you said I was doing a great job. But I haven't looked at anything at all since you practically woke up. Because every time I ask you, you say Katara's already done the job."
Her face doesn't change a millimeter. There' not a single hint of apology.
"Actually, I can't believe that I didn't even see it sooner." Katara may be the most motherly out of all of them, but the idea of Mai succumbing to it so willfully and so often was definitely off in itself.
"Sit down, let me take a look."
She sighs and complies. Mai stretches a long leg out on the steps for Aang to examine, already bored with the situation. Aang draws a flask out and wills the water out. The odd thrumming sensation flows through her lower extremity as he feels out her injury. She notes the blue tattoo on his head. Then the same pattern over the knuckles of his hands. It looks faded, she thinks.
Aang nods to himself, satisfied with what he saw before he reaches up and his hands hover over her head. He concentrates as he looks at the state of her skull, and is glad to see the bruise near her temple has all but disappeared. He does not forget the sight that greeted his eyes when he landed on that ship. The startling brightness of the blood that ebbed fresh from her leg and how consciousness slipped from her. For a split second, he'd thought that he and Sokka had arrived too late. It doesn't leave him, and it is a worrisome memory of his friend that he carries.
He draws away when he is satisfied with the results. Aang looks her up and down, and is glad to see that the memory he carries is thankfully, truly a memory. Mai is doing well in her recovery. Bored expression and all. Whatever head trauma she suffered left no devastating effects luckily, and the flesh wound on her leg is making good progress.
"I'm fine," she concludes monotonously.
Aang sits back and rests his arms over his knees. "You're not fine, but you're doing pretty well." He looks at her, "your leg looks like it'll be good. But just make sure you let Katara actually check it."
Mai deflates a couple centimeters. "...Right." She pauses. "You're leaving today too, right?"
Aang watches her gaze fall to the ground. Admittedly, he is a little confused to the sudden sullenness in her tone. He didn't realize Mai would miss him so much, and he is almost flattered. But it wasn't like she'd be all alone. After all, she had Zuko and Katara to...Oh. Okay, that made sense now.
"Hmm," he scratches idly at his chin and feels a stray hair poking out. "Well...I'm not positive yet. Maybe not for another few days."
Mai's profile shifts from carefully curated boredom to slight surprise before returning to its blank slate. Relief washes over and she feels glad as she watches the courtyard.
"Gotta stay flamin' you know."
She nearly groans at his corniness.
And Aang is rewarded with the ghost of a smile in her grimace at his ridiculous lingo. He smiles to himself. He knows he'd appreciate it if someone were to do the same for him after all.
He could hold things off a little longer.
AN: Yup. I admit that I needed to do some research. I'm fuzzy on the series now, and all it's major arches in addition to the workings within that world. Might have to do some more serious research. Like re-watch the entire series. Oh, what hard work! These replies to reviews are so ridiculously late. Fail. I appreciate them as always though guys, you have no idea.
Seventy-Eight: Yeah, I'm sure that's true. And the popular devotions to Zutara are indeed what spurred this, I admit. Zutara is so prominent, that I got fed up and figured I'd try to humor the idea and try for the unusual pairing of the Mai and Aang who tend to get thrown aside in Zutara. I do love me some weird pairings anyhow. Though I do enjoy the canon a lot. Hmm, well, we'll see how it goes for the firebenders. Thanks for the R&R!
SimplySinful21: Taking on the backlash is definitely proving to be a challenge. And oh, Azula. I like Azula too. Well, I like everyone mostly in ATLA, can't deny. Appreciate the R&R
Doctor Deadpool: I'm glad to hear that this is making sense. I am working hard at making their relationship plausible, because well, it's a crack pairing.
Some Random Weird Guy: You are indeed correct! Totally Zuko-related. Hopefully this chapter made up for the cruel cliffhanger. Somewhere along the way on writing this, I think I've managed to convince myself that MaixAang is one of my favorite pairings now too. It is incredibly rare though.
31Bravo: Always surprised to see a MaixAang fan, but cool!
Theyuri265: Well, I think your question's been answered.
Ninja master: Mai'll get out of it. :) Thanks for the R&R
Guest #1: I can see your point, but I figure that if you don't see it coming, you just don't see it coming.
Guest #2: I feel that this story is mostly unique in that it is a MaixAang, hah. Glad you enjoy it though
Everyone else who demanded/asked about story progress: voila. My longest chapter yet. Albeit years late. Heh.
As always, thank you for the reviews. They're appreciated!