Keep Holding On

"Keep holding on 'cause you know we'll make it through. Just stay strong 'cause you know I'm here for you. There's nothing you could say; nothing you could do. There's no other way when it comes to the truth. So keep holding on 'cause you know we'll make it through."- Avril Lavigne

There were a lot of reasons I had to move, and none of them I was comfortable with sharing. I started packing three days before, and procrastinated so much, that by the day before I was leaving, I still was packing. I didn't want to leave my dad, because I had lived with him all my life.

My mother had some big problems. When I was twelve, my parents divorced. It was hard for me, and my parents got joint custody. Still, they let me pick who I wanted to live with. I remembered all the fights my parents had, and all the things that ruined my life, so I decided to live with my dad. My mom had to clean herself up before I could ever live with her again.

It was my senior year when I got a long letter from my mom. She basically invited me to move in with her in her new city of Forks. One could barely call it a city; it was more like nothing.
But my dad was the only thing keeping me in L.A. I had just lost a boyfriend and had to go to court because he was hitting me. He went to my school, and, with the restraining order, either I had to leave or he did. Even though he hurt me worse than anyone had ever hurt me, I didn't want to make him loose everything. I had a mom to go to in a different state. I needed to get away.

Right as I was about to fall asleep, there was a knock at my door. I sat up to see my dad peak in.
"Anna-Maria?" he whispered. "Are you awake?"

I sat up. "Yeah."
He walked over to me and handed me the phone. "It's your mother."
I took the phone from my dad and put it to my ear. "Hello?"

"Anna-Maria!" she squealed loudly in my ear: same old mother. "How are you, sweety?"

I smiled tiredly. "Good, Mom. How are you?"
"Just fabulous! When's your flight leaving? I want to come pick you up as soon as you get here!"
"I'll have Dad send you my flight number so you can keep track of it. Other than that, how are things?"
"They're going really well! I've got everything ready for you! But we'll have to share a bathroom, but you'll be okay with that, right?"
"Of course Mom. I'll be fine."

"Great! All the people are so lovely! You'll have a great time here! I promise! Well, get a good nights sleep. I love you, Anna."
"I love you too, Mom."

"Good night."

"Night."
I hung up the phone to see my dad still standing in the doorway. I looked up at him and gave him a weak smile.

"What did your mother want?" he asked, with a tone of jealously in his voice.

"To make sure I was ready, is all."
"Are you sure you want to leave?" he whispered.

I nodded. "I can't stay here Dad, and you know that."

"I just wish you could."
"I'll come visit you, I promise."

"You sure?"

"Yes Dad." I smiled. "I promise."
"Good night, Annie."
"Night, Dad. I love you."

"I love you too."

I closed my eyes and went to bed.

When I woke up the next morning, it was already ten o'clock. My flight didn't leave until one in the afternoon, but I told myself I would wake up early to spend a little more time with my dad. That plan failed.

I took a shower and pulled my strawberry blonde hair into a ponytail. I didn't do anything with my make-up except put a bit of concealer under my bright green eyes. I felt beautiful, even with no make-up on.

I was so excited to see my mom, even though we weren't that close. The last time I had seen her was in my freshman year, and, even though she called me everyday, I still didn't feel as close to her as I did with my dad. Still, I knew that I would love living with my mom.

I put the last things into my suitcase and brought it downstairs. My dad would be sending the rest of my things by mail, so I wouldn't have to worry about that. All I would have to worry about was getting my clothes there.

My dad had already made lunch. We ate in silence. I knew my dad was upset that I was leaving, but I couldn't stay in L.A. There wasn't any way that I could change what I had done, and, at least in Forks, I would get a second chance, and that was just what I needed.

By the time we were done with lunch, it was time to go to the airport. It was only a twenty-minute drive to the airport, so we left only an hour and half before my flight, just enough time for my to go through security.

When my dad dropped me off at the airport, he got out to help me with my bags. We checked them at the curb, and then we stood and looked at each other. I was the first to move, and I grabbed him around the torso.

"I love you, Dad," I whispered.

"I love you too, Annie." He hugged me back. "Be safe, okay?"

"Okay." I kissed him on the cheek. "I'll call you when I get there."

"Alright, love. I'll talk to you soon."

"Thanks, Dad."

And I walked away.

The flight was only two hours, so I didn't have to sit for too long, even though there was another hour flight to get to the Forks airport.

I switched planes as soon as I got off of my plane to Seattle. It left about thirty minutes after I landed in Seattle. I took my seat and fell asleep until landing.

When I got out, I saw my mom waiting for me. She looked exactly the same way she did when I left her. She still had the same blue eyes and long, blonde hair. Her body was still that of a super model, and she still dressed the same. I hadn't realized how much I missed her.

I ran down the stairs and into her arms. She laughed and held me tight. I missed her hugs, and I missed her laugh.

"Mom," I whispered. "It's so great to see you."

"You too, Anna." She pulled away and kissed my forehead. "I missed you so much!"
"I missed you too, Mom."
"Let's get those bags. It's only a twenty minute drive back to our house."
We grabbed my bags and walked back to her car. It wasn't as extravagant as the last car she had, and I was proud. It was a sign that she changed, and that was exactly what I needed.

"So, Anna, what's going on?" she asked after starting the car.

"What do you mean?"
"Well, your dad told me a couple things that have happened, and, well, we're both worried about you."

"It's nothing, Mom," I whispered. "I don't want to talk about it. That's why I left."

"Well, if you ever do, I'm always here for you."

I smiled softly. "Thanks Mom."

"No problem, darling." She took a deep breath. "You're going to love Forks. The people are so friendly!"
I smiled. "Yeah, so I've heard."
"A couple of the parents have asked about you, and their girls are excited as well."

Oh great, I thought, but I faked a smile. "Great."

"It's going to be so great!" she exclaimed.

We got to the house in no time, and it was nothing that I imagined. I never imagined a big house, seeing as Forks was a small town in the middle of scenic nowhere, but this house was tiny. I guess when she said we would have to share a bathroom, she wasn't kidding.

The house was two stories at least, but it was still small. It was a creamy brown with three windows on the front and a door. Everything about the house seemed cheap, and I wasn't used to that. My dad's apartment was bigger than that house.

"What do you think?" my mom asked hopefully.

"It's… great," I lied.

She smiled. "Good. Now, let's get these bags so I can show you the house."

I nodded and helped her get my bags. We took them inside and lugged them up the stairs. She opened a door on the left side of the stairs.

"Here's your room." She smiled. "You still like pink?"

Yeah, I liked pink when I was five.

"Yeah," I lied again. "I do."

The fact was, I couldn't handle that much pink. The entire room was pink except for the walls and the furniture. I tried to seem excited that my room was pink, but I really wasn't.

"Great!" She put her arm around me. "I'm so happy you're here, Anna."

I turned to hug her. "Me too, Mom."

"Good. So do you want something to eat?"

I looked around my room. "No thanks; I'm good."

"You sure?" she asked. "Because I know how to cook now."

I chuckled softly and turned to her. "I'm really good. If I get hungry, I'll make myself something. I probably won't be hungry until like midnight. Plus I want to take a shower."
She looked really disappointed. "If you're sure."
"I am. Thanks for everything, though, Mom. I couldn't ask for more."
She smiled. "I'm glad to hear that, love. Get yourself settled. If you need anything, I'll be downstairs."

"Thanks Mom. I'll see you in the morning."

"Night, hun."
"Night."

She closed my door and walked out.

I examined my room for a moment before falling down on my bed. It wasn't great, but I would make the best of it. I had to if I wanted my life to change.

I took a shower and staid up until about one in the morning. My mom was sleeping by then, so I went downstairs to raid the kitchen. I grabbed a package of strawberry Poptarts and went back up to my room. I started playing some of Taylor Swift's new album, Speak Now, as I lay down on my bed. It was so weird to be in Forks. It was cold and rainy and I wasn't used to the quietness of the town. But I would get used to it. It would only be a matter of time.

I woke up the next morning around seven A.M. to get myself ready for school. I could hear my mom downstairs, so I got dressed and did my make-up quickly. When I walked downstairs, there was a glass of milk, a package of Poptarts, and a backpack on the table.

"I hope this is everything you need." She came over and hugged me. "I tried my best to get everything together."
"Thanks, Mom."

"Oh, and I have another surprise for you." She reached into her pocket and pulled out a pair of car keys. "Go outside."
I smiled and hugged her again. "Mom, you didn't have to."

"I did. Now go see."
We both walked outside, and there was my car. It was a Chevy truck that was repainted white. The inside was fine; it had a heater, which was all that I really cared about.

"Thanks, Mom." I hugged her once more before getting in. "This is awesome."
"It's the least I could do." She opened the passenger door and placed my backpack on the seat. "Have a great day, Anna."
And, for some reason, it felt like I was driving to my first day at preschool.

I got to school and parked at the first spot I could get. I threw my backpack over my shoulder and took a deep breath. I didn't want to be there.

I walked out to the main building, trying as hard as I could not to get noticed.

"Hey!" a girl's voice called from my right.

I took a deep breath and turned around as a perky girl walked towards me.

"You're Anna-Maria, right?"

I tried to be friendly. "You can call me Anna."
"I'm Jamie. You're mom has told my mom so much about you. It's so good to have you here."
"Thanks?"
"No problem. Now come on; I want you to meet my friends."
She grabbed my wrist and took me to a car where a bunch of teenagers were hanging out. There were four guys and three other girls.

"Hey guys!" Jamie exclaimed. "Look who I found!"
"Anna?" one of the guys laughed. "Nice to finally have you here."
"How do all of you guys know who I am?" I asked.

"Word gets around in a small town like this," the same guy chuckled. "If a new person comes, everyone knows about it."
"Be nice, Kyle." Jamie hit him in the chest. "Are you guys gonna introduce yourselves to Anna?"

A small, brunette girl held out her hand. "I'm Meghan."

"I'm Ryan," the tallest guy said.

"Nathan at your service," the cutest boy laughed.

"Becca," a blonde girl whispered.

The other girl smiled. "And I'm Paulina."

I sighed as I looked at the entire group of kids.

"Are you all seniors?" I asked.

"Yeah," Nathan answered. "Finally."
Jamie laughed. "Yeah. It seems like we've been in school forever."

I sighed again. "So what's school like here?"

"Boring." Meghan looked up at me. "What we really want to know is what life was like in L.A."
"Not as glamorous as you would think," I chuckled.

Ryan ran a hand through his hair. "The only thing to do around here is go to the beach."

"Oh, that reminds me, there's a bonfire this weekend at the beach!" Paulina exclaimed. "Do you want to come?"

I smiled. "Sure, I'd love to."

"Plus the guys in La Push are so hot!" Becca laughed.

Kyle pretended to gag. "Gross!"
"Oh, shut up," Becca sighed.

"We're never invited to these bonfires," Nathan mumbled.

"Do you want to be invited?" Meghan asked.

"Not really."
"Then be quiet."

Before anything else could be said, the bell rang.