A/N:

Thanks to the wonderful Breather for beta-reading! Link to her profile here: u/2557138/breather

Naruto stirred, blearily rubbing at his eyes and wondering what he was going to make for breakfast. He scratched his head in concentration, 'Hmm. Chicken flavored, beef flavored, or something special like lime shrimp? Tough decision…' Consumed by his thoughts, he stubbed his toe on the table in his kitchen, swearing aloud.

"Ow! Stupid-ass table being in the way! How dare you stub the future Hokage's toe!?"

Naruto's growing tirade against his table ceased mid-rant as his eyes caught a glinting from atop the table. He walked over to it and picked up his forehead protector reverently, all thoughts of ramen fleeing from his mind. Naruto looked out the window and noticed the sun was midway through the sky, the village teeming with sound and life.

'So, it wasn't a dream…'

Naruto pulled out a chair and collapsed in it, the events of the day coming back to him. He didn't know whether to be excited or depressed. 'On one hand', he started, 'I'm a badass ninja now! I've got a kickass teacher called... something. But Hokage-jiji said whoever it was is the best, and I'm gonna show him just how good I am!' Naruto grinned, pumping his fist. 'On the other hand,' Naruto's grin faded, 'I got a monster stuck in me…'

Naruto pulled up his shirt and channeled some chakra, staring at his stomach. Sure enough, a seal appeared on him, and just staring at it made Naruto feel worse. He kept looking at his stomach until long after the seal faded, uncharacteristically pensive. He shook himself and jumped out of his chair, shouting, "Who cares, -ttebayo! I'm Naruto Uzumaki, and I'm gonna be Hokage, demon fox or not!"

Naruto swiped at the air, fire in his eyes. He looked down at his forehead protector and quickly tied it on his head. He ripped open his door and raced out to the railing outside, bellowing to the village, "Ya hear that, everyone? I'm a Genin now, one step closer to Hokage! I'll show you who's the best ninja ever, -ttebayo!"

Naruto blustered his way across the village to the Hokage tower, intent on getting his special move from the Hokage. Full of vim and vigor, he wasn't going to let anyone stop him, -ttebayo! But the secretary on the other hand…

"And I already TOLD YA, Hokage-jiji will let me in, he knows me! You just saw me today with Iruka-sensei!"

"Oh, well that makes everything better! I'm sure I can just let anyone up to see Hokage-sama without an appointment, especially kids like you who can't even say his title properly! What a GREAT secretary that would make me!"

"It'd make you a FANTASTIC secretary if you could just let me IN!"

"And it'd make you a FANTASTIC brat if you could just GO AWAY!"

"Well I'm not gonna leave until you let me in!"

"Well I'm not gonna let you in, so that's that!"

"ARGH!" Naruto threw his hands up in disgust, glaring at the secretary. She didn't miss a beat and stuck her tongue out right back at him, crossing her arms in front of her.

Naruto sighed, dropping his head into his hands. They'd been at this for over an hour, now. Maybe some diplomacy would work? He looked back up, and twitched. The secretary was already looking over some documents like they hadn't just argued for over an hour. Naruto breathed deeply, and said, as politely as he could, "Excuse me, ma'am?"

The secretary looked up, a sneer on her face. "OH. You again. Didn't we just discuss this? No entry for you."

Naruto bit the inside of his cheek to keep from screaming at her, instead holding his hands at his side and bowing. The secretary looked shocked, staring at his bent head.

"I'm sorry, ma'am. May I please see Hokage-sama? It's an important matter concerning details he and I discussed previously. If you would be so kind as to let me in to see him, I would be very grateful."

The secretary smirked. 'He just might be useful yet.' "Why, of course. If you just asked politely the first time, I'd have let you in straight away," she tittered.

Naruto whipped his head up so fast that the secretary was surprised he didn't break his neck.

"EXCUSE ME!? HELLO? WHAT WAS THAT?" Naruto politely yelled.

The secretary laughed at him, waving away his concerns as Naruto pouted. She interlaced her fingers and leaned forward.

"Look, kid," she said, gazing at him shrewdly, "this is a ninja village. Did you not think I didn't see your new forehead protector?" she asked, pointedly glancing at his forehead. "I'm the secretary to the Hokage for a reason, not the least of which is teaching some humility and respect to up-and-coming Genin. Do you really think that you'll never have to practice some respect with your peers, not to mention your superiors?" At this, Naruto looked abashed, shifting uneasily.

The secretary sighed, running a hand through her hair and relaxed in her chair.

"Don't worry kid, everyone makes these mistakes and there's really no way to prepare you for them aside from experiencing it first-hand. Believe me, it's much better this way than to get uppity with some of the Jonin who don't give a shit about who you are." She smiled. "They will break you. I'll just make you feel bad."

Naruto looked at her, nodding resolutely. "Thank you, secretary-sama." As he trudged off to climb the tower, he realized he still didn't know her name, and asked her. The secretary smirked and turned back to her work, "Maybe when you make Hokage, I'll tell you. All the more reason, right?"[1]

As Naruto finally made it to the Hokage's office, he was interrupted from knocking on the door when it opened and bandaged, cyclopean man with a walking stick shuffled out. The man peered at Naruto, and the boy got the distinct feeling he was being measured for his worth. The man shook his head and resumed walking away at a slow pace. [2]

Weirded out by the entire event, Naruto walked into the Hokage's office, looking back at the door, still feeling that stare.

"Hey, Hokage-jiji, who was that creep that just walked out?"

Not getting a response, Naruto looked over to the Hokage, who had his head bent and his hands laced in front of him. Unsettled, Naruto walked to the desk, "H-Hey, Hokage-jiji, are you alright? You're kinda scarin' me here." With no response still, Naruto was getting very worried and was unsure on what to do.

In the midst of contemplating whether or not he should go get the secretary, the Hokage looked up, his face an angry thundercloud. Naruto stepped back, scared he had angered the man somehow. Shaking his head, Sarutobi reclined in his chair and said softly to Naruto, "I am fine, Naruto-kun. That man who just passed…" He shook his head again, somehow putting in more disgust in that gesture than he ever could in words. "He is a necessary evil of this village, and were it not for you here I might have just excised some of this great tree's roots. But please," Sarutobi said, "don't let the ramblings of an old man get to you. What did you want, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto was slow to respond, wondering if the old man had just threatened to kill someone. Dispelling those thoughts, he said, "Oh, I was wondering if you were going to teach me that clone jutsu you said you would. I have three days until meeting with my teacher, so I'm not gonna sit around doing nothing." The boy thumped his chest with his fist, grinning. "I'm a Genin now, and I'll be damned if I don't take that hat from you yet old man."

Sarutobi smirked, amused by how indomitable Naruto seemed to be. "Hm, I don't doubt it. But if you're really in a hurry to take on all this paperwork…" Naruto paled, his grin slipping away. "Hah! Guess not yet, eh? Well, alright. I'll hold onto this hat for some time yet. But, enough with the chit-chat. The technique is called Kage Bunshin no Jutsu, or the Shadow Clone jutsu."

Naruto listened raptly, not missing a word. Sarutobi's eyes narrowed, 'If he was this attentive in training, how did he nearly fail?' Setting aside those thoughts for the moment, he went on. "This jutsu is ordinarily very chakra-prohibitive. It splits the user's chakra in two, which ordinarily doesn't sound bad, right? Anyone can do that forever. However, the problem is what happens when they disperse. When that happens, most of the chakra that was comprised of the clone is lost, and you're already at a deficit of half your entire chakra. There is not to mention a base value of making the clone itself, which also costs quite a bit of chakra, too. This is why not everyone can use this technique. Since you have so much chakra, it's perfect for you. [3]"

Naruto's eyes narrowed. "That sounds… ridiculously expensive. Surely I don't have enough chakra to do it that often, then?"

Sarutobi shook his head. "No, you really, really do. You can do this all day long, even without using the second aspect of this jutsu. That's probably due to your unwanted guest." The Hokage gestured to Naruto's stomach, the boy unconsciously grasping the cloth there.

"The second part of it lets you reabsorb some of the chakra used when the clone is dispelled, although it is very difficult to do. Essentially, you feel for when the clone disperses, and pull onto the chakra that lingers behind. There's a small link between you and the clones, which means that there is an effective range limit. Considering that there are a number of jutsu that alter the clone when it's out, including detonation, what would stop anyone from making a clone army and then bombing a village?"

Naruto gaped. 'Clone BOMBS!?' Trying to employ the diplomacy tactic he used earlier, he asked politely. "Hey, Hokage-sama, I don't suppose –"

"No."

"Dammit."

"Now, onto the third portion of this jutsu. This is the final portion, and you learn more by experience, so I'll actually teach you the seal for this jutsu now. Watch closely."

Sarutobi formed his fingers into a cross, and a perfect, solid clone materialized beside him.

Naruto nodded, fingers twitching into the shape, but paused. Sarutobi watched him intently.

"Hokage-jiji, why don't you just use the clones for paperwork?"

Sarutobi shook his head, smiling softly. "Don't you think I tried that already, Naruto-kun? Instead, why don't you try reading some of the paperwork I have here with a clone, and then dispelling it? Try to put as little chakra as you can in the jutsu."

Naruto nodded, confused. Forming his fingers into a cross, he shouted, "Kage Bunshin no jutsu!"

The Hokage coughed. He had forgotten how much smoke this jutsu made when not mastered…

As the smoke cleared, Sarutobi saw Naruto hacking in the middle of the room. He also saw Naruto hacking near the back of the room. He even saw Naruto hacking near the side of the room. He began to get a headache from the amount of Naruto coughing.

The real Naruto finally came to his senses, and looked around. There were copies of him everywhere. Elbowing one out of the way, he was surprised when it dispelled. Repeating the action, he saw another dispel. Frowning, he looked at the Hokage. "Well, I've got a couple of questions, but I guess the first one is why was there so much smoke!? When you did it, there wasn't any!"

"To be honest, I wasn't expecting as much smoke either. The smoke is basically chakra burn-off from having imperfect chakra control. Since you have terribly poor control, not only did you burn a ridiculous amount of chakra – probably more than most Genin even have – you also made a lot of clones. Since I have perfect control, there was no wasted chakra and no smoke." Sarutobi explained, then frowned at the new Genin. "I assume you realize this means you will be refining your chakra control for ages. It's not exactly fitting for a ninja to create so many obvious signs of using a jutsu, is it?"

Naruto looked around the room at all of himself, and sighed. "Yeah, I get it."

Sarutobi nodded sharply. "Good. By the time you do that jutsu in front of me again, I want much less noise, smoke, and a smaller amount of clones. Now, on to the original point of this demonstration. I want your clones to read this paperwork. One paper each."

Naruto stuck his tongue out at his father-figure. "Ha! Like I'd do your work for you, old man!"

Sarutobi flicked Naruto in the head. "Just do it, squirt."

Rubbing his forehead, and giving Sarutobi the stink-eye, he ordered his clones to read the mountains of text.

After thirty minutes, several pouches of tobacco smoked by Sarutobi, and Naruto nearly asleep in the corner, the Hokage threw a pencil through one of the clones, waking up the real Naruto as it dispelled.

"Ow! Why did you do that?" he complained, rubbing his head.

Sarutobi grinned. "Do what?"

"You threw a pencil at me, jiji."

"Oh really?"

"Yes, really."

"Where's the pencil, then?"

"It's-."

Naruto paused, seeing the pencil on the ground, but ten feet away.

"Oh…"

Sarutobi nodded. "Yes. You receive the memories of your clones. Now, I want you to try to disperse all of your clones at once and see what happens."

Sarutobi prepared for Naruto to faint from the backlash, but was astounded to see that Naruto remained on his feet, and undamaged.

"Uh…."

"You still haven't explained why you can't use it for paperwork, jiji," Naruto pouted, still rubbing his head where he was sure he was struck by a pencil.

"Normally, though I am beginning to wonder if that word ever applies to you, the backlash from receiving the memories of so many clones would cause you to faint, or at least get a severe headache. But, since you are Naruto, and I should stop expecting things to happen normally around you, that clearly didn't occur." Sarutobi pinched the bridge of his nose. It seemed as if he would get a headache instead of Naruto. "Would you mind explaining to me why you currently aren't in pain right now?"

Naruto paused, in the middle of dancing for joy that he'd never have to suffer through paperwork. Smirking at Sarutobi, he said, "I sorta felt as if it should hurt, but not really. It was like when I got the memories at once, I felt a building pressure that just stopped all of a sudden."

Sarutobi pondered on this. "That…shouldn't happen. Would you mind lifting up your shirt again?"

Naruto shrugged, obliging him. He peered down and saw the seal glowing incandescent before settling down. Panicked, he looked at the Hokage who seemed troubled. [4]

"So what the hell does this mean?" he demanded. "Is it failing or something, or what? That didn't happen earlier today!"

Sarutobi shook his head absently. "No, no, the seal is fine. It's done this before, though you may not have realized. Try taking a kunai out and scratching yourself."

Naruto, relieved that they were in no imminent danger of dying any time soon, reached into his bag and pricked his palm with a kunai. Instead of bleeding on the floor, the cut seemed to seal almost instantaneously, his kunai barely leaving his skin before the cut being fully healed.

"That's…"

"Yes," the Hokage nodded grimly. "One of the benefits of your unique situation is that you seem to heal very quickly. Before you ask how I know, it's because we monitored you. Did you never wonder why you had no bruises after sparring sessions?"

"Kinda," Naruto admitted, "but I didn't really pay any attention. It just seemed that I got hurt less than others."

Sarutobi sighed. "Well, no use pondering over it. I advise you to try and stay away from interacting with your guest. It can't hurt you, but… just be careful. You may need its power in the future, but that should only be as a last resort."

"Now," the Hokage said, moving on to more pleasant topics as he saw Naruto's uneasy face. "I assume you realize what this means for training, yes? Since the Shadow Clone is made of chakra, and you apparently don't receive the backlash for it, you can use it for chakra control exercises, jutsu training, general information, spying, etc. For you, I'd imagine it would be the greatest training tool you could have, not to mention its battle potential. I noticed you saw that it took the slightest of blows to dispel the Shadow Clone, right?"

At the boy's nod, Sarutobi continued, "I'm not going to get into the specifics of why this occurs, but suffice it to say that due to it dispelling at the lightest of blows, only a true taijutsu master can effectively utilize them in hand-to-hand combat.. It is mainly used for sowing confusion, guerilla warfare, and long range support. For you, especially, I'd imagine the last option is appealing. But, I digress. The Shadow Clone is amazingly versatile, and since it's not chakra-prohibitive to you, I expect you to come up with some truly astounding things, yes?"

Naruto, seeing the challenge thrown at him, latched onto it. "You bet, jiji! I'll be the best, most unpredictable ninja ever! No one's gonna stand a chance against me and my Shadow Clones!"

Sarutobi chuckled, amused by Naruto's determination. "I'll bet. Now, since we've got this training lesson out of the way, I think you owe me one."

The Hokage straightened in his desk, and adopted a solemn expression. "Genin Uzumaki, I'm assigning you an S-class mission. You will be acting with my authority, and the fate of the village may depend on you. Do you accept?"

Naruto's eyes burned with passion, and he snapped off a salute. "Yes, Hokage-sama!"

Sarutobi grinned wickedly. "Good. Now, I need you to sort the rest of the paperwork for me. I'll be taking a walk." Sarutobi got up from his chair, placed his hat on Naruto's head, and walked out, gently closing the door behind him.

Sarutobi heard the boy's indignant squawk all the way from the base of the tower, and he laughed.

A/N:

[1] This lady will not be that important, and she will remain nameless, but I constantly see in fics that the Hokage's handpicked secretary is somehow mean to Naruto and I simply don't understand why. He's the Hokage, he knows who is who in his village. He's never going to appoint someone who is biased to Naruto as such an important staff member. This point also indicates that Naruto will be actually groomed for Hokage. In a ton of fics, he defeats the big bad but we –never actually see him make Hokage-. I actually want some closure for once.

[2] Danzo will be important, but he's not going to be the end-all be all secret asshole. He loves the leaf, he knows Hiruzen is useful, and he doesn't have some desire or whatever to be Hokage. He just intensely loves the leaf. The confrontation he and Sarutobi just had was important in regards to upcoming plot point.

[3] I don't understand why in canon everyone cannot use the shadow clone. You can divide by 2 forever. It's not exactly difficult, so I've changed the way it works, which explains why people like Sakura will not be able to use it for a while, maybe until Chunin/Jonin. I've also made it so that it's virtually useless as a close combat tool, outside for the smokescreen/slowing someone down. If someone is really good at taijutsu, say Itachi, and they're able to improve their clones to the point that it takes a good while for you to get a solid hit on them, then it's a massively effective technique. The shadow clones can also fire jutsu themselves, being pure chakra constructs, essentially.

[4] Hiruzen is troubled here because he knows exactly why this has happened, due to there being two previous containers for the fox, but he doesn't know how to explain why he knows what has happened to Naruto. Naruto does have watchers, but he isn't monitored that heavily.

If it wasn't clear before, Naruto was never abused or hurt by anyone. He was just given the silent treatment by most everyone, which the Hokage has no control over.