HSWC Bonus Round 2

by spockandawe

All my written fills for the first bonus round of the 2014 HSWC. Some of these go into potentially upsetting topics, but relevant warnings for each of the stories are listed in the notes at the beginning of each chapter. These prompts took the form of non-English words with no direct English parallels.

24. Sollux-Terezi

Sollux/Terezi: Geschmacksverirrung (German), "Aberration Of Taste," When Someone Else's Taste Is Deemed Simply Wrong

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gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA]

GC: M1ST3R C4PTOR!
GC: H4V3 YOU FULF1LL3D YOUR 4SS1GN3D M1SS1ON?
TA: ok fiine here2 the piicture of my hiive youve been buggiing me for wiill you get off my ca2e now

twinArmageddons sent file fuckyoutz-png

GC: 4H4H4H4 P3RF3CT! :]
GC: 1 KN3W 1 WOULD W34R YOU DOWN 3V3NTU4LLY
GC: OOH TH1S 1S D3L1C1OUS
GC: 4LL R3D 4ND BLU3 3V3RYWH3R3 W1TH 4LL TH4T BR1GHT HON3Y Y3LLOW 1N TH3 B4CKGROUND
GC: Y3S 4PPL3B3RRY 1S D3F1N1T3LY R1GHT FOR YOU
TA: yeah you know that doe2nt even make any 2en2e
TA: lot2 of apple2 are green and really mo2t berriie2 arent blue
TA: you ju2t liike beiing weiird and off-puttiing
GC: SHHHH YOU 4R3 SPR34D1NG V4LU4BL3 TR4D3 S3CR3TS 4ROUND
TA: iim pretty 2ure 2ayiing that you get your kiick2 by annoyiing people ii2 the oppo2iite of a 2ecret
GC: 4PPL3B3RRY BL4ST
GC: 4ND 1TS P3RF3CT B3C4US3 1TS TWO TH1NGS
GC: DO YOU KNOW WHY 1TS P3RF3CT TH4T 1TS TWO TH1NGS? :]
TA: go2h no ii have no iidea what you could po22iibly be hiintiing at becau2e everyone know2 ii hate the number two and al2o the color2 red and blue
TA: ju2t a2 much a2 tz hate2 beiing bliind and ob2e22iing over color2 and botheriing people untiil they do whatever 2he want2
GC: YOU HUSH
GC: T4K1NG ON3 S1LLY P1CTUR3 OF YOUR H1V3 W4SNT 4NY TROUBL3 4T 4LL
GC: 4ND 1N R3TURN 1 H4V3 GON3 TO 4N 3QU4L 4MOUNT OF TROUBL3!

gallowsCalibrator sent file YOUR3TOT4LLYCUR1OUS-png

TA: fuck you ii dont giive a flyiing fuck what your hiive look2 liike
TA: waiit
TA: holy 2HIIT
TA: thii2 ii2 liike a joke riight?
TA: you colored all over your hiive ju2t for the purpo2e2 of takiing the mo2t obnoxiiou2 piicture you could
GC: :?
GC: 1TS JUST MY H1V3
GC: D3COR4T3D T4ST3FULLY
TA: now you 2ay ta2tefully but do you actually have any iidea what that word mean2
GC: 1 M34N TH4T 1T T4ST3S D3L1C11OUS :]
TA: ok ii walked riight intwo that one
GC: 1T W4S 4 P3RF3CT S3TUP
GC: BUT 4LSO 1TS NOT TH4T UGLY :[
TA: no yeah iit kiind of ii2
TA: ii thiink my retiina2 may be permanently 2carred from thii2 experiience
TA: no offen2e but iif vrii2ka hadnt fucked wiith your eye2 ii thiink you miight have gone blind anyway2
GC: 4WW YOU S4Y TH3 N1C3ST TH1NGS
GC: S3CR3TLY TH1S 1S MY H1V3 D3F3NS3 STR4T3GY
GC: H1V3 1NV4D3RS WONT KNOW WH4T H1T TH3M :]
TA: fuck -ii- hardly know what hiit me
TA: give a guy a liittle warniing before you a22ault his viisiion liike that
TA: iit2 liike a horror fiilm ii keep goiing back and iit hurt2 ju2t a2 bad everytiime but ii cant ju2t look away
GC: 1T H4S HYPNOT1Z3D YOU W1TH 1TS B34UTY!
TA: beauty ii2 a really fuckiing generou2 word there
GC: OH DONT B3 M34N
GC: YOU D3COR4T3D YOUR H1V3 W1TH YOUR F4VOR1T3 COLOR2 TOO
GC: YOU C4NT D3C13V3 M3
TA: but that2 diifferent
TA: the2e color2 go together and al2o ii liimiited my2elf two a FEW color2 2o thing2 would actually match and 2hiit
TA: god lii2ten two me ii 2ound liike kn
TA: ii diidnt take the briighte2t most obnoxiiou2 po22ible ver2iion of every color on the 2pectrum and throw iit everywhere becau2e re2traiint i2 not a word youre famiiliiar wiith
GC: R3STR41NT 1S BOR1NG!
GC: COLOR 1S FUN
GC: 1 COULD T3LL YOU YOUR H1V3 1S BOR1NG 4ND D4RK 4ND N33DS MOR3 COLOR
TA: yeah but you ju2t told me that you liiked how iit looked
GC: BY TH4T 1 M34N 1T 1S NOT 4S B4D 4S YOU USU4LLY S33
GC: WH1CH 1S GR4Y GR4Y 4ND MOR3 GR4Y
GC: 1TS 4 GOOD ST4RT BUT 1T N33DS MOR3 BR1GHTN3SS
TA: no
GC: OH DONT B3 4 WR1GGL3R 4BOUT TH1S
GC: 1 W1LL M4K3 YOU TH1NGS 1N R3D 4ND BLU3 4ND YOU W1LL US3 TH3M B3C4US3 TH3Y 4R3 YOUR F4VOR1T3 COLORS DO NOT D3NY 1T
TA: what deny that theyre my favoriite color2 or deny that iill u2e them
GC: 31TH3R ON3!
GC: B3C4US3 1F YOU DO YOUR WORDS W1LL ST1NK OF L13S
GC: DO YOU N33D 2OM3 CURT41NS?
GC: 1 TH1NK YOU N33D CURT41NS
GC: WH3NS YOUR WR1GGL1NG D4Y?
TA: no
GC: DONT WORRY YOU 4LR34DY TOLD M3 1LL JUST GO LOOK 1T UP :]
TA: tz 2top iit youre not goiing to decorate my hiive from halfway acro22 the fuckiing planet
TA: tz?

gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling twinArmageddons [TA]

TA: goddammiit