Chapter Seven
She tastes like rice wine and she smells like rain.
This is Sasuke's only thought as he kisses Sakura for the first time. He can barely see her in the dark of his bedroom, but he can feel her well enough. Slender body, all kunoichi's grace, a mixture of softness and strength. He puts his hands in her wet hair—he loves her hair and wishes he could make out the color of it, no doubt dulled from pale pink to a duskier shade in its dampness. Sasuke tilts Sakura's head back, nips the sensitive skin of her neck, and presses a light kiss to the abused flesh. She clutches at the fabric of his shirt.
"Turn around," he says, and Sakura does as she's told. He touches her bare shoulders, like he's been wanting to do all night. Slides his fingers down her back, following her spine. Then he unzips her dress, and she takes it off. Strips down to nothing but her plain, cotton underwear.
Sakura laughs, and the sound warms him. "If I'd known this was going to happen I would have worn fancier panties."
"Doesn't matter," Sasuke says. "You won't be in them for long."
To prove it, he pulls her underwear down and slips a hand between her legs. She whimpers and says, "Sasuke-kun." She's so wet for him already, they could fuck right now and it would be good for her. He'd make sure of it. But there are other things he wants to do first.
Sakura steps out of her panties and turns to face him. She's naked, all slim lines and gentle curves. He cups her small, pert breasts, drags his thumbs across her nipples. She trembles and her breathing grows shallow.
"You all right?" he asks.
"Yeah," Sakura says, and she smiles. "Just a little nervous."
"Why?" Both of them are experienced, and as shinobi they've received shots to prevent the conception of children, so there's no need to worry about pregnancy.
"Because it's you," she says. "Because I—you already know why, Sasuke."
Because she loves me.
Maybe it should bother or unsettle him, but it doesn't. All he feels when he thinks about her confession is a certain sense of comfort. She's the only person to tell him she loves him since Itachi, and there is a part of him that misses hearing it.
"Your turn," Sakura says. "I want to see you without clothes in the way."
Sasuke undresses quickly, and for once he lets his shirt and pants and boxers fall to the floor instead of folding them. When he stands before her, bared, he feels a strange apprehension. Not because of his nakedness; he's confident in himself and comfortable in his body. He can't place the source of his own hesitance.
Her hands roam along the contours of his stomach and chest. "You're beautiful," she says.
They stumble to the bed, mouths matched, all over each other. Entangled already, a mess of limbs and one-sided love. Sasuke pushes her down onto the mattress, moves on top of her, and Sakura wraps her arms around his back. Holds him to her and kisses his neck, bites his shoulder. It hurts, but only a little. A small pain that amplifies the pleasure. He touches between her legs, and she is warm and soft and, at least in this moment, his. Sakura throws her head back, breaths sharp and labored. Lightning illuminates the room and he sees the graceful line of her throat, the sweet curve of her breasts.
It doesn't take long, and when Sakura peaks her back arches off the bed. She grabs at the sheets and moans—a high, staggered, needy sound that drives Sasuke to slip two fingers inside her. To fill her and feel the wet quivering of her body as she comes. By the time she falls to the mattress and whispers, "Now, please, now," he's already opened her thighs and pressed himself against her. She slides her hands down his chest, holds his cock, guides him inside her body.
Sasuke kisses her and pushes into her gently, testing. Kisses her again, swallowing the soft sounds she makes every time he thrusts. Her lips taste of sake and something that is purely Sakura, and she feels so good, so tight that it almost hurts, but not quite, like her nails now biting into his back.
They move together, slow, languid, hands and mouths exploring while they (fuck, he thinks, distracted, is not the right word for what they are doing). Until slow and tender is not what he wants anymore, and Sasuke pulls away from her, out of her. Their bodies part, and Sakura asks, bereft, "Sasuke-kun, what are you—?" He turns her over, presses her down, flat against the bed. Understanding, she opens her legs, grips the sheets, and he loses no time getting inside her again.
Sasuke braces himself over her and now it's faster, harder. Sakura's moans are muffled by the pillow, and he doesn't like that. So he grasps her chin, turns her face to the side, and says, "I want to hear you."
His breathing grows ragged as he gets closer, and he can feel the muscles in his stomach and legs tensing. He tries to slow down, to even out his rhythm and bring her to climax again, but it's been so long, and he's overwhelmed by the fact that this is the Sakura, the woman whose warmth he's craved since he was boy. Pleasure coils low in his belly, spreads throughout his body, and Sasuke comes with a shudder and a half-shout. He spills himself inside her, shaking. Then, as much as he wants to collapse, he's careful to continue holding his weight above her.
Sasuke kisses the back of her neck, because even when he's spent he needs to keep touching Sakura.
Later, they lie side by side, fingers entwined, listening to the storm. Rain pounds against the roof, and once again Sasuke is reminded of Kyobetsu and the comfort he found in her arms. A different kind of intimacy than the sort they just shared, but no less potent. It scares him a little, the effect she has on him. Having sex with her was not, perhaps, a wise decision, but it is hard to make the right choice where Sakura is concerned.
She turns on her side, drapes her arm across his chest, and asks, "What are you thinking?"
He could lie, but it seems wrong, after what they did, to be false with her. "I'm hoping this wasn't a mistake," he says.
Sakura lays her head on his shoulder. "Do you regret it?"
"No, but I'm afraid you might."
She shakes her head, nuzzles his neck. Her breath is warm against his skin when she says, "I could never."
He feels relieved, because, whatever selfishness drove him to do this, it was not his intention to hurt her or take anything she wasn't prepared to give.
"I love you," Sakura whispers, and he can tell from the tremulous tone of her voice that she's nervous. "Can I say that? Do you mind?"
"No, I don't mind." Sasuke plays with her still damp hair and presses a kiss to her temple. "It feels good to hear."
He almost wishes he could say it back, if for no other reason than because she deserves to get more in return when she offers so much. Sakura's love is not a light thing—she is as fierce in her affections as she is everything else—and he knows this, appreciates it.
"I'm glad," she says. "I want to make you happy, if I can. If you'll let me."
She said something similar the night he left Konoha. Back then, happiness was no more than a distraction from the vengeance he sought, and it was not a thing to consider. Now, although he has found a certain easiness and contentment in his simple life in the Leaf village, it seems too far out of reach to be reasonable. It would be unkind to express his doubts about this, so he keeps them to himself.
Sakura pulls away from him, gets out of bed, and puts on her underwear.
Sasuke sits up. "What are you doing?"
She finds her dress and says, "I, well, I thought I should go home."
He watches her, holding the wrinkled black dress, waiting to see if he will invite her to stay. "Come back to bed," he says.
Sakura smiles, slips beneath the covers, and curls up by his side. They kiss until the rain stops and the sky lightens, and then, for the first time since he was a small boy, Sasuke falls asleep in the arms of someone who loves him.
She wakes up in an empty bed that smells of Sasuke. Sakura stretches amidst the rumpled sheets and smiles when she thinks of the previous night.
It's never been like this before. Neither Hideki nor Kenji brought her any pleasure, and whatever bodily satisfaction she found with Taro was empty and unfulfilling. Sex with Sasuke was something different. Something infinitely better.
By the bright sunlight spilling through the windows, Sakura thinks it must be at least noon. She yawns, leaves the bed, and goes to the kitchen. She finds Sasuke pouring two glasses of orange juice. He looks up, and for a moment his eyes linger on her bare breasts before shifting back above her neck.
"Morning," she says. He nods in greeting and holds out the second glass. She takes it and drinks gratefully. Sakura is thirsty, and the juice washes the sleep taste from her mouth.
"When do you need to be at the hospital?" Sasuke asks.
"Not until this evening. I have a night shift," she says. "I'm training my brats at three though."
He's looking her up and down now, and Sakura feels herself blush, but she refuses to cover her chest. "Do you want to talk about last night?"
"What's there to talk about?" Sasuke asks.
"I don't know," Sakura says. "Maybe we should decide whether it's all right to tell people about this."
Sasuke shakes his head. "It's not anyone's business."
"Okay." She finishes her juice and sets the empty glass on the counter. Her hands feel empty without something to hold, and she fidgets. "Is this something you would want to do again?"
He's silent for a long time, and right when Sakura thinks he's not going to answer at all, he says, "Yes."
She can't help but smile. "Me too."
They shower together, and it turns out that Sasuke likes the water just as hot as Sakura does. She scrubs his back and he washes her hair. The stall fills with steam, and when he starts kissing her neck, she feels lightheaded, weightless. They dry off, go back to bed, and make love again. This time with Sakura on top, straddling his hips, and it's even better with sunlight filling the bedroom. She can see everything: lean muscles straining as he meets her movements, the sweat that beads on his skin, the way his mouth opens and his eyes close tight as he comes.
After, they kiss, and Sakura thinks she could happily do this forever. She knows that this thing between them, whatever it is, will last only as long as Sasuke wants it to, but she resolves not to worry about that. To simply enjoy, moment by moment, this unexpected gift.
Sakura keeps herself busy over the next few days. She shops with Ino, practices her taijutsu with Tenten and Lee, heals shinobi at the hospital, has tea with her parents, and trains her genin for the upcoming chunin exams. She tries not to want anything of Sasuke, which is for the best, because she doesn't see him again until Wednesday afternoon. And then only because he shows up at the hospital during her shift.
He has two broken ribs and deep bruising all over his stomach. "How did you get this?" Sakura asks. "I thought you were still suspended?"
"I am." Sasuke winces as she examines his abdomen, checking for any signs of internal bleeding. "I was sparring with Naruto."
She rolls her eyes. When those two fight they inevitably destroy the training ground they use and one or both of them ends up injured. "I assume you lost?" she asks.
"No," Sasuke says sharply. "It was a draw."
Sakura focuses her chakra to her hands, places them over his chest, and works on healing the fractures. "Then why isn't Naruto here getting his bones mended?"
"Because he's probably at home letting his wife do it," Sasuke says.
"I don't understand why you guys can't pull your punches a little when you spar."
"We do."
She supposes that must be true. Otherwise someone would likely end up dead.
Once she's done, Sasuke stands up and stretches. "Thank you," he says. "When is your shift over?"
"Six-thirty." Sakura watches him pull his shirt over his head, perhaps less neutrally than is strictly professional. "Why?"
Sasuke stands and says, "I want to see you. Come to my apartment when you finish here."
The next three hours are possibly the slowest of her life.
After their meeting at the hospital, Sakura's days remain much the same. Healing, teaching her students and taking them on missions, socializing in the spare moments in between. But her nights begin to look markedly different, because she and Sasuke come to the quiet agreement that she will spend those hours with him.
Tonight, after she finishes a short C-rank mission with Saito, Izumi, and Hachiro, she goes to Sasuke's place. They have dinner together and he asks about her day.
Sakura sips her tea and says, "It was fine. Our mission was pretty standard, no hiccups, just escorting some diplomat from point A to point B. What about you? What have you been up to?"
"I trained with Kakashi and Gai. Learned some new ninjutsu," Sasuke says. "My suspension ends tomorrow, so I can get out of the village. Finally."
Sakura sets her chopsticks down on the table. Considers whether or not to keep her thoughts to herself, and says, "Do you really dislike it here that much, Sasuke-kun?"
"There are things about Konoha that I love and things about Konoha that I hate, but this doesn't have anything to do with that. I can't stand being confined, being made to stay in one place, even if the place is home." Sasuke takes a bite of rice, chews, swallows, and says, "I'm not sure you were really asking about the village."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Sakura says, even though she understands him well enough.
"It means that you were talking about yourself and not the Leaf." Sasuke looks at her, clearly waiting to see how she will answer.
"Maybe I was," Sakura admits.
His hand moves toward her, almost like he means to touch her arm, but then he draws it back. Sasuke frowns and says, "It wasn't easy leaving you that night."
She doesn't need to ask which night; she knows what he's talking about. "But you did," Sakura says. "You left. Sometimes I wonder if you'll do it again. Take a mission and not come back."
Sasuke offers no explanation, no reassurances that she and Team 7 mean too much to him to abandon them again, but he says, "I won't."
Because of Itachi. Everything always comes back to his brother. She wonders, sometimes, if he has room in his heart for anyone besides the dead. If loving the living is too precarious a notion for Sasuke to entertain. There are some things that should not be said, however, and so she does not voice these thoughts.
They finish eating and do the dishes (this time he washes and Sakura dries).
"Let's go to bed," he says, and she follows him from the kitchen.
Sasuke lends her one of his shirts to sleep in, and he surprises her by tapping her back, where the Uchiha crest is emblazoned, and saying, "It looks good on you."
She tells herself not to read too much into that. "Thank you."
They settle beneath the covers and he pulls her close. Tugs down the high collar of her borrowed shirt, kisses her neck, cups her breast, and Sakura loses herself in the feelings Sasuke awakens. They trade touches in the dark, gentle caresses, first over one another's clothes, then under them. When he tries to slide a hand beneath her panties, Sakura catches his wrist and says, "Can we just sleep? I'm so tired."
Sasuke nods, presses a kiss to her temple. He turns onto his side and wraps an arm around her waist. She moves closer to the warmth of his body, and says, "Goodnight."
"Goodnight, Sakura-chan."
Has he ever called her that before? She doesn't think so.
Sakura falls asleep smiling.
"Wake up."
She stirs, stretches, and yawns. "Sasuke-kun, it's so early." Sakura doesn't have to look out the window to know it's still before dawn.
He stands over her, fully dressed already. "I'm leaving," he says.
Sleep-muddled and only half-awake, it takes a moment for those words to sink in. "Oh. When will you be back?"
"I don't know. Depends on what kind of mission Naruto gives me."
"Right, of course," Sakura says. She sits up, rubs her eyes, and smiles at him. "You'll find me when you come home?"
He nods and says, "Sure."
"Goodbye, Sasuke-kun." She bites her lip and reaches for his hand. He lets her take it and entwine their fingers. "Be safe."
Sasuke squeezes her palm and says, "Goodbye, Sakura."
He lets go, turns away from her, and leaves.
As soon as she hears the front door close, Sakura lies down and pulls his pillow to her chest. She buries her face in it and breathes in the warm, autumn scent that belongs to Sasuke. Like a fire burning low, down to smoke and embers.
Sakura does not see him again for twenty-six days.
Author's Note: Many thanks to my awesome beta, tall-girl-in-a-small-world. And again I want to express how encouraging all of these reviews are. Thank you to everyone who is taking the time to let me know how much they're enjoying the fic or to leave some constructive criticism.