This is chapter 1… hope you will like it! This is even more confused than the prologue! If you want to understand something, you have to read all the story. (and yes, I know… the prophecy I had created isn't very good… ; ; )
"Recalls"
Well, good reading…
"What do you want to believe? What can be seen, or what is hidden?"
1. Reversed truths behind the real part 1: Iron sky
So the one who returned from his travel
found what he didn't want to see…
It's like when you're in front of a marvel,
if you do understand what I mean.
----
And like a dead man who's walking
this traveller was so desperate:
he didn't even hear my talking!
It was evening (at half past eight)
---
Ah, ah… but slowly I took him
because, you know, sometimes I'm hungry…
I put him on a trembling rim
but he didn't fall, and I was angry!
---
But the humans are so weak, you know?
And he died 'cause he was sick.
I took him because it's the only thing I do,
and so the food is the only thing I seek.
---
...after have eaten, I often go to sleep...
---
But now, my eyes are closed!
And no one shall be dead.
Don't try to go where I'm posed
because if you do, you are dead.
---
…sometimes, I shall wake up again…
---
And when this time will come
who would be my new prey?
Someone with an heart, strong
and glowing like a sun's ray.
---
And when the right time will call
I will took that person with no shame.
Don't even try to escape, like a fool!
Because if you do… you'll only raise your pain.
---
(this is the prophecy's whole translated text)
1. Reversed truths behind the real part 2: Pierrot's smile
I remember so well that day…
The city's roads were dressed like ladies for a party; their street-lamps were lighted up, even if the curfew already struck a lots of hours before, and that gave at the night's sadness something of the daily glee. Aromatic candles, small coloured lights, oil-lamps, lanterns: every citizens did something to fight back the gloomy nightly shadows, and everywhere, something was shining, brighten the dark evening's nine; the threes were adorned with feisty ornaments for the day on.
Dolls, puppets, books, toys, specialities of the day like sweet plump-cakes, chocolates cakes, syrupy fruits, and clothes, like skirt, dresses, trousers, jackets, along with ornaments for the threes, Santa Claus' dolls… it was the 24th of December, after all, a day when children went down the streets yelping happily, and in the following evening, they would wait with excited anxiety the midnight, when Santa Claus would bring presents to them; a day when even adults seemed to be disposed to buy gifts on gifts only to create a smile on their children's faces.
Everywhere, a thick aroma of desserts was raising, and from the windows you could see, behind the scarlet curtains, families who inside the dining room were eating meals, cutting the roasts, or just laughing, drinking wine and talking happily on the last news. In other houses, there were even impatient ones that were starting to open presents realised for the day after. Children who stole biscuits, old ladies smiling at the grandchildren who was watching with excitement beautiful dolls, mothers that were laughing with their kids; and inside the houses, children on their granny's knees listening intently to imaginary stories of dragons and princesses, with an astonished "o" on their faces… and more, more people… but everyone, had a smile on his face.
Plus, a lively slight fog was covering the whole city, giving at the lights, somehow, a strange appearance of magic… and maybe magic something was, after all, on the 24th of December…
Sadly, he didn't have anything of that.
With the few rags he had… he was wearing crooked coffee trousers that were tied around his tiny waist thanks to a worn string used to close a box, two months by; over, he had a shirt, maybe a long time before, white but now black as the deepest night. Anyway, he didn't complaint at all… he was okay with that. He found it a few days earlier in the trash, taking it, and trying to clean it in the near river, but it was like he didn't do nothing… because the shirt remained as before, dark like shadows.
Along with those few clothes, he had only a yellowish scarf too long for him that wrapped his whole neck, moving down to his belly, and a napkin made of blue silk enfolded around only one arms… the left arm he wanted to hide from the others' gazes.
He was walking along one those streets, slowly, with a look of an intense sadness inside his cobalt eyes: he knew so well… he knew that the only method to have even a little fragment of that world, was stealing, and that… he just couldn't do that. But, when his pupils would fall casually on a puppet, on an happy face of a child like him, on a mother's smile, on a father's laugh, on the aroma raising from an hot cake… he was inclined to take, to take everything, but...
It was impossible for him, right? Even if he would ask with kindness, even with his natural little voice -thanks to that he had been called "girly"- no one would feel pity towards him, no one would give him something… he'd have back only a shameless look, and if everything gone wrong, along with the words, there would be awful facts.
He stopped, sitting on the cold steps of an house.
He was hungry: it was from the afternoon before that day he didn't eat, and the only thing he had consumed, was a little piece of bread fallen from a woman's bag. In the first time, the child had tried to give her back what she had lost, moving towards her… maybe wishing for an unexpected kindness by the woman, maybe, she would even gave to him something. But she had said with evilness in her voice "Like I'd want something from your dirty hands… go away, stupid child!!"
The child had felt in two different ways, that time… he was glad, because he obtained something to eat, but the most awful feeling, was the sadness to have been discriminated. Again. Even if no one accepted him, he couldn't become used to that sentiment of grief… of loneliness.
After, he started again to walk, trying his best to ignore the pain at his feet… ah, yes! Didn't I tell you? Two kids, bigger and stronger than him… him, so little and skinny couldn't nothing against them, so they stole his shoes, leaving him alone on the chilly ground.
"Come! Come, people! Hot delicious plum-cakes! Come and get one!"
The fragrance approached the child, and even if that was softly tickling his nose, he tried to ignore it, to not create fake hopes, because he knew he couldn't have anything, and to wish with nothing…
was even more depressing.
He sighed… the only times I ate a sweet things, was when I was staying at the orphanage… but even here, I must have eaten one or two pieces of cakes…
It was painful… but even now…
The only friend he ever had, was a girl called Alice: she stayed with him at the orphanage. She was two years older than him, and she had lost her parents because of an accident during a storm; she had no other relatives, and so, they put her in that place.
She wasn't really tall, but her slenderness made appear her bigger than how she was really. Her hair was short, blond… he remembered so well… one day, he had said to her with childish enthusiasm "You're like the sun! The yellow sun in the sky!"
"Why?"
"…'cause… hmm…'cause I say so!!!"
And she laughed a little, smiling warmly to him "You're so kind"
Her pupils were coloured by a deep blue. What a strange couple! Her sapphire eyes and the golden hair… the sun glowing on an ocean? But he had thought of her like a sister, the sister he never had. Alice, that with her strength she protected him for the others, who always made fun of him, him little cry-baby.
"Ah! Look! He's crying again! Little cry-baby!!"
"What're you doing!?"
"Stay out from that, Alice!"
"Yeah, stay out! Go away! He didn't need her mommy, now!"
"Stop teasing him!! He's only a child!!"
"Yes! A little cry-baby! Why don't you go her, eh? Idiot, why don't you go to your mommy?"
"Stop!! Don't hurt him!! Damn you all…!"
"What did you said!?"
"I said damn you all!!"
"Stupid girl… why are you defending him!? It's brainless, little, and touchy! It's a weak person… he can't live in this world!
"Everyone cries!"
"We not! And plus, he had that horrible arm of his! Why are you defending a little crying monster like him!?"
"Why don't you understand!? He's better than you all!! He… only because a person is not beautiful outside, this doesn't mean he's not beautiful inside! Have you ever try to talk him like normal persons!? How can you say it's awful if you don't even know him!?"
"Tsk… like we will talk to him…"
Alice, never teased him, never make fun of him… and maybe, in her heart, she had understood the only thing he needed was some affection, some love. He was a child, after all, and at that young age, everyone necessitate to be treasured.
He was so happy during those years!
But then, Alice fell ill.
The disease came from the east of the Europe, silently, and no one could do something against it. First, London, and after all the city around, and when it arrived at the orphanage, the most part of the children fell ill. Also Alice.
He had remained by her side the whole time, even if his little heart was anxiously pumping inside him, even if he'd like to escape from all of that, he had remained near her, gripping her hand, saying stupid songs he used to listen, comforting her, smiling, trying to be strong only for his friend… and Alice was smiling, even through his tears.
She died smiling…
He had cried during her funeral. He had cried for the next days… everything remembered him of her, put the child in a deep anguish. He had felt guilty for her death.
And then, the other kids started again to tease him. That time
(for her)
he had tried to fight back, to hold back his tears, he had tried even to attack them… sadly, they were stronger than him, faster, and he was alone.
Alone. This word became like an endless requiem for him… it became his world.
Two months had passed from Alice's death, and he finally came at the conclusion in the world there was nothing good for him. Everyone hated him, everyone didn't want him. He was alone, and he would die alone. It was his fate…
So, one night, he climbed down the building, silently with some food, some water, some tears, escaping, speedily swallowed by the darkness' shadows. From that time, he never looked back, he never return in the place, and he lived alone along the world's roads.
But he loved his new life… finally, no one could discriminate him.
…but he hated his new life… with no one walking at his side…
"But a so young child mustn't be alone, right?"
He still remembered well those woman's words… he was going on, and suddenly she looked at him smiling. He was sure… sure, in the first time, she would accept him, giving the permission to call her "mom", he was so sure, and hopeful… that when her eyes caught his left arm, changing her initial smile in an afraid grimace, when she screamed to him to go away, the child couldn't hold back the burning tears. It was one of those times, when repairing under a three's foliage, crying, he asked to himself why his life was like that, why he wasn't as the other children, why he didn't have any mom, any dad, why everyone considered him the most awful monster…
"Kid?" He flinched, turning perplexed, to meet a girl's chocolate eyes, that smiled to him. She had red hair, and she was gripping with one of her arms a crooked puppet "Kid, do you want my doll?" She offered the toy to him, laughing softly "If you want it, say your name and become my friend!"
"I…" She was asking to become his friend? Him? "I didn't have any name, sorry. But if you like, I'd love to become your friend"
"Really? You can have Kittie, then!!" The child hesitated, for an instant unsure what to do… she was giving him her toy, really? She wanted truly to become his friend? His pale-blue eyes met hers, with a silently question inside them, a noiselessly pray… do you accept me?
No one, instead of Alice, seemed to accept him… Wanted to accept him. Well, he knew perfectly he couldn't be friend with everyone! But the true problem… the true problem was anyone desired his company. They looked angrily to him, they teased him, they insult him, maybe even kicking him, and only because they didn't understand the child, only because he was different, only because they were afraid.
Him, a little child with no crime… simply guilty to have the strange arm he carried at his side.
"You didn't want that?" He flinched again, and a smile coloured his lips, his eyes burned. It would be stupid to cry in that moment, but he was so happy! So happy!
"Thanks!" He said, taking the puppet.
"But why you didn't have name? Your mom and your dad didn't give one to you?"
"I didn't have…. parents, sorry"
"Oh... so… it's okay if I call you… ehm… Allen?"
"Allen? It's beautiful! I like it very far!!" In the while, Allen never looked away from the puppet "But you're sure Kittie doesn't feel lonely with me? If you're away…"
"But you will become my new little brother!! So she doesn't feel alone!!"
"Your br-"
"Elisabeth, dear, what are you doing?"
The children cringed, turning around with surprise to the voice's origin. The probably mother of hers was watching them with an happy and puzzled expression inside her chocolate eyes… but she's smiling, Allen noticed, shocked. Is she smiling to me?
"Mom!!" Elisabeth yelped, running to her like she wanted to hug the woman, but suddenly stopping, and indicating him "Mom, can he become my new little brother!?"
"Elisabeth…" Her cheerful smile didn't fall "I believe this child has already a family… a mom to stay with. He can't come with us"
"But he said he didn't have any! He said he didn't have any mom or dad!! Right, Allen? Right?" She asked, turning to him.
Allen created a sad little smile on his face "It's true, miss. I don't have parents"
Slowly, life is someone reduced the scene's speed, the woman's expression changed, and in the place of her puzzled happiness, there was now sadness "You're alone…?" She murmured.
"Yeah…" But he smiled… he smiled because this is the most simple way to fool others.
"Mom, then, can he become my brother!? Eh?!"
The woman vacillated… sure, she was feeling pity toward that child still smiling, with his expression of fake gladness, but what would say his husband? Would he accept him?
"Yes, Elisabeth, if he want he can"
-
And after… after…
-
Allen remained still, leaving those words enter slowly inside his mind, leaving the happiness, little by little, kidnap him, almost like he was going to eat the last chocolate of his life… That woman… she had just asked him if he would like to become his son, to say that simply. To him, that he even never imagined a family… and now, they were offering it to him, with a gentle smile and a puppet.
"…r-really… I… I..." He even didn't know what to say, how to react.
They always said to him he was a cry-baby, they always repeated to him that cry was pointless… but, if his joy was so huge? So huge, that it was hurting him?
"Why are you crying, Allen?" The little girl approached him, with a worried expression on her childish face "Are you sad?"
"Elisabeth, sometimes people cry because they're happy"
-
Ah, ah… it was short, right? It was so short… like a firework! You didn't have the time to see it, and it has been already swallowed by the night…
-
Have you ever buy an ice-cream? Yes… probably yes. Well, you haven't any other money, and you choose your favourite flavours. What do you like? Cream? Chocolate? Melon? Citron? Mine are watermelon and mango, if you like these. Anyway, after have bought it, you give it one lick, alone in the city center.
How do you feel? It's a wonderful sensation to have something you love, right? You're happy, but…
It slips, falling on the ground, with its gruesome sound of squashing. Now tell me, do you feel different from before? Irritate, yes… but some sadness? There's always a drop of grief, even tiny –it's only an ice-cream after all- to have lost something… You understood, right? Now, multiply this sadness more and more again… Maybe, now, you can understand a little how Allen felt, when that family betrayed him, throwing him again how his biological parents already did. Him… who never had family, who didn't even know what have one would mean: he had that for one instant, but it already fell like an ice-cream liquefies under the sun's gaze.
If someone would be here, maybe he'd laugh at how the world could be awful, but there was only Allen, who remained still, silently, trembling a little under his new clothes... observing the two person that were watching his left arm with a scared expression.
He tried one step, eyes burning.
"STAY BACK!!"
"B-But…" What could he say? He must be used to that kind of people… but… everytime, he found himself with his tongue stopped like a stone stops a stream, the body blocked, and his eyes swallowed by his own tears.
Too much… for a child…
"Go away!! GO AWAY!! We don't want you!!"
"B-But you s-said…"
"But you will become my new little brother!! So she doesn't feel alone!!"
"Yes, Elisabeth, if he want he can"
"Elisabeth, sometimes people cry because they're happy"
"BUT YOU SAID…!!" He screamed "You said…" He didn't understand "You s-said…" He lowered his gaze on the ground…
The same… thing, over and over… the same thing!! And I…
I…
...this stupid world…
over…
I…
-
"You said?" A lot of people accepted me before seeing my left arm…
You know, I always ask myself one thing… I'm an exorcist because I choose that way… but, sometimes, I find hard believe in a God. If it exits, why my life went on like that? After all, I didn't do anything wrong…
Why in the world there are sad children and happy children? If I thought of someone, somewhere, that allows something like that…
Bah…
The only beautiful thing I think I ever had...
-
In the while, it started to rain.
The sky had suddenly darkened, the grey clouds seemed to be willing on gathering on Glasgow's firmament, crying on the city. The Christmas' morning had been erased, and for the sadness of all the children, only water, not snow. If you looked, from the insides of an house, outside, you could observe with attention the tiny particulars of every little river walking on the windows' glasses, every single lines that was wetting the transparent… river flying on the air, to say that simple.
From one of those glasses, a face was reflecting, silently. From inside, you couldn't understand if it was because of the rain, of that visage was really crying, from inside, truly, you could see only a vague shadow… apparently human. And if you saw that from outside, the shadow changed into a child posed with his elbows on the window-sill, taking him raised from the ground, drooping feet, his hair all wet moving down messily around his face, and the clothes soaked that were flattening on his skinny body. But neither from that point of view you could say if he was shedding tears or not.
Allen stopped here from already ten minutes. He wasn't crying, he wasn't even near the tears, and to the truth, he didn't even have any will to cry… But his face was really not happy.
Confusion, with a drop of fear, deep sadness, and maybe, some despair, and the melancholy of a rainy day… the melancholy of go trough Christmas without nothing to do but look, from outside, a glowing three and a lot of presents, and children that were already opening them… and knowing the impossibility to have all of that. It's melancholy, right? And the loneliness only came to complete the picture. The title? Allen's heart.
He was feeling that way from the last night, after the family of the little girl had threw him away with evilness, and trying to comfort himself, he thought that after all he could even change his clothes! He must be happy…
Sadly, it only caused more tears.
So, hands inside his pockets, lowering his head, he escaped in the heavy night, trying to find a place where sleep. He found it… he didn't have any nightmare, strangely, but he woke up with a sad look.
Now, he wasn't interested in find a place where he could hide from the rain. He wasn't even interested of being ill or not… he could even die! He didn't care… death, was even more better that the world…
He gave an irritate look at his arm… It's not so beautiful to watch, after all, Allen thought, but why people must see him trough that? He wasn't his arm…
He jumped down the window-sill, hearing the splashing of his feet under him.
Ah, ah… it's even good! He smiled sarcastically at the sensation of the water entering inside his shoes… it was the best feeling he felt in the last hours…
With a thoughtful expression, Allen started again to walk along the road, shuddering at every drops he felt falling on him, looking at the ground, like if the watery ground could give him a solution. He was turning inside a minor street, when, crushing on something, he fell back.
"You're okay!?" A voice asked, while the child was trying to get up, but slipping everytime, he only hurt his back more.
"Yes… sorry, I didn't see you" Finally, he managed to stand up, not even caring to dry away the mud now onto his clothes. He looked at the man… he seemed sincerely worried, but Allen didn't want to remain with someone under the falling rain.
"Sorry" He murmured again, starting to walk away, but he didn't have the time to make two step, that the stranger took him by his shoulder.
"You don't have any umbrella?"
"No"
Allen was sure of that… that man was hesitating, but he heard him said "Would you like to accompany you back? You risk to catch a cold under the rain like that"
"It's not a problem"
"Where are your parents?"
"I don't know"
"You… don't… know?"
"Yes" He looked directly to him "I don't know"
"And where you live?"
"Somewhere around"
A child!? The stranger cringed, in the same time, letting go of him. His coffee eyes met with the azure ones of the child, leaving him confused… those pupils… that glow… You could give that light –that darkness- to a suicidal, not a child, those were eyes made for who didn't want anymore to live, not made for a kid…
"If you want you can come wi-"
"What!? With you!? Don't make me laugh!!" Allen felt something inside him… something painful that paralyzed his chest: he was tired… "ALL OF YOU SAID THAT!!! ALL!! BUT WHEN YOU SAW MY ARM, THEN, WHY WOULD YOU!? EH!? IT'S ALL RIGHT BECAUSE I'M A LITTLE CUTE CHILD, BUT WHEN IT COMES MY ARM… THEN… THEN YOU ALL HATE ME!!! YOU'RE AFRAID!! AND YOU TOO, YOU TOO WILL DO THAT!! I KNOW!!" He was tired to be judged, to be seen through his arm…
But the man, perplexed, asked "What… you're talking about…"
"WHAT AM I TALKING ABOUT!? LOOK! LOOK, SO WE FINISH THAT SOON!!!" He lowered his eyes, looking at his arm, raising it… feeling his own tears burning on his cheeks "LOOK!!" Allen screamed "YOU'RE AFRAID, RIGHT!? YOU'RE AFRAID!! COME ON, GO AWAY!! RUN AWAY!! CALL ME A MONSTER AND RU-"
But he shuddered, when the foreigner took him by his left arm with a gentle violence, without hesitation… looking directly inside his pale-blue eyes without fear. A thunder shrieked far away, making Allen tremble.
"You're afraid of thunders?"
Even if he was, the child remained still, only turning away his eyes, only wanting to leave that place…
"You're afraid of not being wanted by other people?"
"…shut up…"
"It's not like everyone doesn't want to. There's different people in the world"
And you're one of them?
"Shut up…"
Don't make me laugh…
"Bu-"
"SHUT UP! SHUT UP!!! NO ONE WANTS ME!! NO ONE!! NEITHER MY PARENTS, NEITHER THE OTHER CHILDREN, NEITHER THE PEOPLE… NO ONE WANTS ME!! YOU'RE THE SAME AS OTHERS! YOU'RE THE SAME! I DON'T BELIEVE YOU!!! I HATE YOU!!"
"But now… you're doing to me the same thing the others do to you"
"B-But… THE PERSONS!! The p-persons always said to me…"
"Persons are stupid. If I take care at everything they said to me, now I would be dead"
"But…" Somehow, his mind wasn't able to give faith in that man. After all, if you don't give at anyone your trust, you can't suffer… right?
"I DON'T BELIEVE! YOU'RE AS OTHERS!!! EVEN YOU!! NOW… n-now… you will say to me to go away… to g-go away… right!? RIGHT!? COME ON!! SAY THAT!!!"
"Why you can't believe me?"
"BECAUSE NO ONE WANTS ME!! NO ONE!! WHY YOU WOULD!?"
"I'm not as other people. I already said that… you're doing the same thing the others do to you" The man sighed, murmuring something Allen didn't hear, but raising again his eyes to him, he said "You are different from others. Others are afraid of you… you're saying I'm not different from others… so you're saying you're the only one different? Because if you do that… you're wrong"
But I'm tired of everything… "I don't care. Let me go"
"Try to have more faith in others. If you can't, then you always will stay alone"
"Let me go"
"Only if you come with me"
Allen cringed "What!?"
"Only if you come with me, I will let you" The man repeated, smiling "I don't want a child alone under the rain with no place to go"
"If you let me go, then, I will run away"
"Then, I don't let you go. What's your name?"
"I don-"
But the stranger interrupted him "Mine's Mana. Mana Walker… so, what would you like to do?"
"I want you to let me go"
"Only if you come with me"
"You're annoying…" Murmured the child, moaning "I don't want to come with you… I… I DON'T WANT YOU! SO LET ME GO, DAMN YOU!!"
"Say your name"
"I'M ALLEN, OK!? I'M ALLEN, NOW LET ME GO!!!"
"Ok..."
Allen finally felt his arm released, as he watched the man raise up. The child remained still for another moment, just few seconds to leave Mana made one or two steps, and then… even if he really didn't know why, he started to follow him.
"You're okay if from now on you will be Allen Walker?"
"WHAT!?"
He heard Mana laugh softly "I take that as a yes"
"I DIDN'T SAY I WANT TO STAY WITH YOU!!"
"The, why are you following me?"
"I'M NOT FOLLOWING YOU! I'M ONLY GOING ALONG THE SAME WAY!"
"Ok, ok… calm down"
But Allen, was sure… he felt Mana's smile suddenly raise.
-
This is how I met with Mana.
In the first time, I didn't even let him touch me… Ah, ah, ah… It was a strange thing, really! But little to little, I finally understand he was really different from others. When I understand he really could be a father for me, I couldn't stop smile, I couldn't stop laugh.
Only thanks to him, I started to have more faith in people…
And when I accepted him, after two or three months, I think, I thought that this life couldn't die. I thought I would be with Mana forever… and when he died… I felt in the same way I felt when Alice died, but worse, more and more worse… I think I stopped again for few months to have faith in others.
And then, I met with Cross… he wasn't like Mana. Mana was so kind, gentle… always so nice with me! Instead of him, always angry, always playing at poker, so mean and not caring…
The only thing I liked of him… was that he didn't care about my arm. He wasn't…
Allen gave a gaze at the grey sky, outside the window, outer the iron bars… it was still raining.
…afraid of me.
He sighed, closing his eyes. Trying to think about fun things, about something that would make him a little more glad…
"Your friends are coming"
Allen cringed, turning back to see…
1. Reversed truths behind the real part 2: The situation's portrait
Lenalee leaved his eyes walk off the windows, on the sky… it was raining from almost three weeks, and her projects to make an holiday with her friends miserably died in those watery days. She had hoped for the sun to raise and light up just one day, and she had wished too for some of her friends to come with her… unluckily, nothing of that happened.
Her brother was sinking under his own work, and Lavi has been closed inside the library's prison by Bookman. Kanda… well, she hadn't even tried to ask him, and Crowley was out for a mission. Miranda was busy to increase her synchro-ratio, and Allen…
He's behaving so strange last days…
From day when the storm started to scream, suddenly, the young exorcist had changed his face… he seemed totally another person. He barely talked, and he smiled even more less. In the first time, the girl had thought that maybe something happened, maybe, he was sorry for something she didn't know, maybe, he was just thoughtful… but the deepest ways of her heart, Allen had changed into someone else… something else. He was even more "passive", like he didn't want to stay with others, him, who often search for others' company.
Lenalee… was trying to avoid him, to be honest… even if she felt sorry for that. She didn't even ask him if he was free, but, she didn't even see him in the last week.
"Lenalee! I was searching you!" She flinched, at Reever's voice, turning back to meet with the always tired face of the man "Komui wants you. It's important"
"What's happened?"
"A mission"
"A mission?"
Now?
………………………………
"Strange… why is everyone so agitated?"
"I think two exorcists gone missing…"
"Missing? Who?"
"Allen and the new one… hm… Crowley, I think he's named…"
"Them!? No wonder why Lenalee was so nervous! When I saw her… she had an expression like his brother had died!"
"Don't be so calm… it's not that simple"
"Why?"
"Along with the missing thing, it came a strange registration, too"
"A strange registration? From Tim?"
"No… it was from Crowley's golem. There's no Innocence, there! Are you sure, Allen, to have seen it? Crowley said that, and after, he screams, and the registration ends"
"Strange… it's like an horror film… And from Tim? No information?"
"Timcampi came back last night, but it was like it was broken… I heard Komui say something like we can't see clear images, and even the voices are unclear… we can't even say if the shadow's Allen or not!"
"So… Timcampy's broken… and Crowley's golem?"
"Nothing from him. They tried to contact him, but nothing came back. There wasn't signal"
"Oh... they did something?"
"Lenalee and Kanda… they send them after Allen and Crowley"
"Lenalee was running because of that, so… ah! Wait a minute! But the Finder with them!? There was a Finder, because he's one of my friends He came to me to say goodbye before the mission… him… what's happened to Paul?"
"I'm sorry… but they found him… killed"
………………………………………….
The train was more slow than what she had thought… or maybe, it was her heart beating too fast, swallowed by her agitation… Lenalee, who was praying that everything would go fine. That everything started wrong, once, would follow his train's desires.
When Komui gave the notice to her, her heart suddenly had stopped his thumping, she had swallowed an unexpectedly fear, but strangely… strangely… damn her! She had even hated herself to think something like that… because, when she heard Crowley's scream, the idea of Allen attacking the other exorcist didn't seem to her so mistaken. Naturally, with a shudder, she had erased the simple consideration of it… why Allen would do such a thing? Why an exorcist would attack another exorcist?
"W-What!?"
"I know you're worried, but you need to stay calm and listen carefully to me, ok?"
"But…!!"
"Lenalee, please… it's hard for me, too. You're the only one that can do this… please…"
"O-Ok…"
"Thanks… anyway, you already knew Allen and Crowley were on a mission, right?"
"Crowley, yes… Allen didn't say anything, so I couldn't know…"
"Allen hadn't said anything? Strange… But have you heard the entire story?"
"No, I didn't… I only knew Crowley was going on a mission… In Ireland, I think…"
"Yes. The mission, exactly, was in a little city on North Ireland. Barelyss it's named. Well, the mission was very simple: find the Innocence, contact us and then, get back. The first day, all went how concurred. But the second day, something strange happened… in the evening of Sunday, we received a strange registration from Crowley's Golem. It said: -There's nothing there… I don't see anything! Allen, why did you say the Innocence was here? Allen? Allen, where are you?- Then, Crowley screamed"
"He screamed!? But why?"
"We don't know. First of all, we tried to contact him. But Crowley's golem was like… broken, so, we couldn't even know where he is. After, we tried to contact Timcampy, and there was signal"
"So we know where Allen is!?"
"Sorry… when we localized Allen's golem, it was already there"
"What? Timcampy turned back without Allen!?"
"Yes… but the most strange thing, is that Tim seemed to had been broken by someone. The images inside him were confused, almost black"
"But…"
"It's not finished. Then, we sent two Finders. But when they contacted us, they said the Finder that was with Allen and Crowley, was dead"
"Paul!? Paul died!? It's impossibile… b-but…"
"The funeral will be tomorrow… I know… he was a good person... but this how all gone"
"So… what can we do…?"
"It's about this I wanted to talk with you. I already sent Kanda, but if two exorcists gone missing… it's better if instead of one, there are two person. So, can you go with him?"
Lenalee had laughed about that mission, with Crowley, before he departed. It was almost sad… they thought everything would be fine, like other times did, but if this mission… if they would be dead, I don't know what I will do… if Allen and Aleister are dead, I…. I…
She gripped her hands on the black jacket she was wearing, trying to not think of it, trying to imagine about something else… even if… the girl knew: the world rarely went on streets she liked.
"But I think it's better to hope than despair in stupid imaginations… maybe I'm wrong, but it's what I think"
An once, Allen, said that -funny to say, he was crying while the words escaped from his lips-.
Lenalee knew he was right, but sometimes was just so hard to take the mind far from those thoughts. She knew, and to smile was better, to go on with a beam on your mouth was better, and it could just make everything right… but she knew, it wasn't so simple. Because sometimes to hope was painful, if after all your wishes died in a single sloppy moment.
To suffer before, to suffer after… Lenalee was sure: the possibilities were just those, and the problem, was just to choose where to walk.
"Finally I found you…" Those words echoed after the violent opening of the door, and the girl found herself with a surprised look on Kanda.
"Kanda! What are you doing there?"
"I'm mission with you. Komui said to me to turn back and meet with you in the way. So, I'm there" He murmured, not even watching her, sitting "Damn… that bothersome moyashi…"
"Be serious! Allen can be in real danger!"
"Tsk… that idiot is always in danger… Damn him! To waste my time for him…"
"It's Allen!! Why do you always call me that!? You can't remember my name!? A-L-L-E-N!?"
Lenalee laughed softly, at the image of Allen hearing that legendary nickname… his ashen eyebrows a little wrinkled, and an angry expression on his face. His arms knotted like a bow on his chest, and the mouth folded in a cross grimace. "How many times I have to tell you my name's Allen?" He would say, to add, after, with that resigned smile of his "Eh, Kanda?"
Of course, the girl thought smiling warmly, the Allen we know would do something like that…
Everyone knew Kanda didn't go well with anyone, everyone said he was a damn cold-hearted exorcist that didn't care about nothing… But Lenalee was sure, somewhere in his heart, Kanda was equally kind as other people, somewhere inside him, he loved his friends. If not, why that worried glow inside his shady eyes?
"You're worried too…"
"It's not true"
"Then, why your face is worried?"
"It's not true. I don't care about an idiot like Allen"
"You call him by name!"
"What…?" Kanda turned surprise towards her "What did you say?"
"You said Allen not moyashi! It means you're worried too!"
"STOP THAT! I'm not worried about that backa!!"
Not answering, Lenalee just started to laugh… not seeing the pale blush that covered Kanda's cheeks.
I'm not worried about him, damn her!!
But maybe…
While I was writing this, I thought a little about that… the world can be really terrible, right? It's only an arm, after all…
And, come to think of it, D.Gray-man's just a manga! But events like that really happened in the world! People discriminate because they were stranger, or different…
Even in my classroom, there are a lot of people who doesn't want to stay with me, only because I usually wear different from other, because I still like anime, because I read manga and books, instead of going out with boys…
It's sad thing, right?
When I was seven, in my class, there was a dear friend of mine… someone didn't like to stay with him: they discriminate him only because he isn't Italian… they didn't even know him! And he's really such a beautiful person inside and outside!
I know it's normal to have fear of what you don't know… but… well, I really can't understand that, it's something really far from my mind.
Sorry if I annoyed you with that thoughts of mine…
VERY IMPORTANT: When Kanda blushed… it's not because he likes Allen, ok? This story's not a KandaXAllen, so stop you daydreaming about kisses and other things! ;D
Well, hope you liked chapter 1, and this is the anticipation of chapter 2:
2- A chunk of dawn
"Go along your nightmare, until you will find the exit. It's that what we always do"
Bye!
:D AcqueCristalline