During breakfast the next morning at Juices' I brought up the fact that we should to go to the club about his suicide attempt. Without even giving it a second thought or hearing me out he started mumbling about how nobody could know and that he's not going to do it again and that I should stop worrying about it.
"Juicy, I know you don't want the club to find out about… what you did, but I think I should at least tell Jax," he looked up at me with fear in his eyes and started shaking his head quite violently. "Juice. Juice!" I said raising my one of my hands up towards him, "Stop, just listen." I explained myself when he stopped shaking his head, "I can convince Jacky to keep it to himself, for a while, until you start getting better and then he won't have a reason to tell the club."
After reluctantly agreeing with me, we finished our breakfast in silence, I then gave Jax a call, asking to meet Juice and me at TM in about an hour. Before leaving I had a shower and thought of how to convince him to keep Juices' little secret to himself, while Juice cleaned up and changed. I took my time riding to TM, Juice was nervous, I could feel him playing with his hands on my stomach; he was still riding bitch as his bike was still at the warehouse.
Jax wasn't there when we arrived so we waited for him in the garage. He arrived around 10 minutes after we got there; to which Juice was pacing the room. Juice had told Jax a simplified version of what he had told me last night and after a little convincing on my behalf, he promised to keep it a secret for now.
I drove the van to the warehouse with Juice to pick up his bike and met him back at the clubhouse where I had to pick up something and meet up with the boys. Jax had given Juice a job which kept him here at the clubhouse instead of with the cartel shit. When I met the boy in the clubhouse he was at the bar finishing off a shot and pouring himself another.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, you wanna slow down there Boyo?" I cautioned him.
"Gotta prove I'm getting better right? Well this will help me," he lifted up his glass for emphasise, it wasn't working the boy looked broken more so than ever.
Next couple of days I spent the nights at his house keeping him company but the boy was still distant and looking worse with each passing day. One night I turned up at his and he wasn't there, assuming he just went for a ride I didn't think too much about it and just got comfortable on his couch. I must have fallen asleep because I woke up and it was light outside. I got up and stretched out some of the kinks in my back and walked down the hallway to Juices' bedroom, his bed was untouched. I started to get really worried then, I called his cell and he didn't answer. I went straight to the clubhouse, thinking he may have crashed there for the night, but his bike wasn't there and the rooms were all empty. I spent the day worrying where the boy was, calling him every few hours hoping he wasn't hurt or worse hanging from a tree somewhere.
When I arrived at TM seeing Juice there, it felt like a weight had lifted off my shoulders. I wanted to pull the boy into a hug when I saw him, but I knew that would raise a few eyebrows so instead I put an arm around his neck while I passed him heading into the clubhouse.
That night I rode back with Juice to his house. When we got inside I slammed the door and started yelling at him. "What the hell were you thinking? I mean not even a phone call? The whole day all I could picture was you hanging from a tree somewhere dead!" I regretted saying that the second it came out. Juice had stop dead in his tracks. After a few minutes of attempting and failing at calming myself and trying to apologise all I could get out was a pathetic "sorry."
"No, it's okay I deserved that," he'd said after a while. He slowly unfroze from where he was and took a seat on the couch. "Look, truth is, I didn't call because I didn't know what to say. I mean the sheriff's been riding me, I just needed to go and cool off." I went and joined him on the couch, and he looked at me then, "I'm sorry, Brother." He then looked back to the ground, hanging his head.
"S'okay, just don't do it again." I said as I gave the back of his neck a squeeze and letting go. "You're really starting to worry Jax and I, Brother. You need to try fix this and soon boy."
"yeah… yeah I know. It's just gonna take some time and a little bit of space…" He said as he looked up at me.
"You asking me to leave Juicy?" I asked.
"Yeah… I mean I appreciate all you've done, it might not look it, but you've helped me a lot. But now I need to start dealing with things on my own Chibs." He answered.
"Okay, bu' it anything happens or yeh need ta talk, don' just go of on one of yeh rides again. Come find me or call me and I'll help yeh anyway I can." I got up from the couch and motioned to him to do the same. When he got up with a groan I pulled him into a tight hug, and before letting him go I tilted my head so I could say to him in a whisper, "I'm here for you my Brother." And gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and pulled away. Moving my hands to his biceps and waiting for him to look at me I say to him "I love yeh Juice."
"Love you man, and thanks, for everything." He replied.
I gave his shoulder a pat and walked to the door, before leaving I turned to him and say "call me anytime Brother," and then head out the door and head home. That night I stayed up, hoping I did the right thing. Hoping he didn't do anything.
Okay so I kinda forget the timeline of the whole Chibs and Juice moments in season 4 and for the next chapter I'm not quite sure if it should be before or after this chapter so forgive me for any stuff ups.