After their fumbling encounter in the forest, Killua and Gon walked hand in hand back towards the base. They would've been there within a couple of days had they not been stopped along the way at a village Gon had… spoken with. Although, as Killua soon found out, Gon had done more than speak.

"Gon! Killua!"

Kaito's surprisingly pleased voice reached their ears when they about a mile away from the village. Gon had insisted that they go around it, reasoning that it would be quicker to just keep going. Killua had agreed, but he'd been surprised at how insistent Gon was. Killua and Gon looked up, a huge smile crossing Gon's face.

"Kaito! I found Killua!"

Kaito looked shocked as he stared at Killua, looking him up and down.

"So you did. He seems to be in relatively good condition too."

"Un!"

Kaito reached out and shook Killua's hand warmly. The look he offered… Killua mentally groaned. He knew. Gon must've said something, or he'd figured out during training. He didn't seem like he'd make a fuss of it though; after he'd shaken Killua's hand, his face grew serious. Here it was. Now he was going to say something along of the lines of 'don't go back to the base, they think you're a mole.' But what he said next was nothing like what Killua had been expecting.

"I don't know how you figured it out, Gon, but everyone is pleased that the mole won't be a problem any longer. And that this rebel village won't be sending anymore kids with bombs strapped to them into our base."

They… what? Killua gave Gon an astonished look as Kaito started walking, leading them to the village. But Gon's usual bubbliness was subdued. He glanced down, nodding slightly.

"Hm."

His voice sounded… off. Like when he'd said 'enemies.' Kaito's words had sounded optimistic, but the look he gave Gon was anything but.

"This village worked for the rebels, providing them with information and preparing to cause quite a stir. One of the men from our base had a lover here, and he didn't realize she was providing the other side with information. He told them about your classes and she told the opposition. You know the rest. The bomb was from a kid from this village. The fact that they used kids…"

Kaito dropped his eyes for a second, and when he looked up again, he was looking at Gon, his face dark.

"Gon… I can understand the men. I can understand the women. But… the children?"

"They were enemies."

The children? What did he mean? Gon's voice had been neutral, and when he was finished, he didn't speak again. He only followed Kaito mutely, not looking at the white haired man or Killua. He seemed to be deep in thought, but as they neared the village, he shrugged off whatever was bothering him and became as sunny as usual.

"Kaito, when can Killua and I start training again?"

Kaito glanced over his shoulder, and for a second Killua thought he saw fear in the older man's eyes. Fear? Of what? But then it was gone and when Kaito spoke, his voice was relatively normal.

"After we clean up the village. It'll take a couple of days to clean it up and completely move all of the bodies, but then we'll go back and finish week four. After that… well, you'll be in different hands. And things will be much, much harder. Do you think you can handle it?"

"Of course!"

Killua only listened with half an ear. Bodies? Children? Enemies? Things were beginning to click into place. When they finally reached the outskirts of the tiny village, things came completely together to make a horrifyingly grave picture. Killua had seen bloodshed, but this… this was complete slaughter.

Blood bathed the sooty main road like water after a fresh rain, splashed over the ground to make horrific shapes, most of which looked jagged and sharp enough to cut. It was splashed up the walls of houses that seemed as if they'd previously been immaculate, lined into the cracks of stone gates and doorways. It gathered in the darkest corners, and spread in the dappled patches of light, washing everything out with a rusty, dark colour that screamed of rot and decay. And in some places, the blood was crusted onto dried up, darker looking… things. The scent in the air left nothing to the imagination—those 'things' were pieces of skin, bits of brain matter, maybe organs…

Killua may have been able to take it in without getting too upset, had a couple of soldiers not excused themselves and walked past him. They were carrying a stretcher, and the shape of the blindingly white sheet placed over top of it may as well have not even been there. An arm hung out, stained dark with blood. A woman's arm. Even so, Killua could've taken it had another couple of soldiers not walked by carrying a stretcher with a body only half of his size.

"Gon… did you… did you do this?"

Killua glanced at Gon pleadingly, as if hoping for some sort of explanation. Gon grinned. A large, happy grin.

"Yep!"

Then he turned to Kaito, launching into the story Killua had told him about his time with Meruem and Komugi. Killua stared at him disbelievingly. What the hell? That wasn't funny. That… that wasn't funny at all. It was a joke, right? They'd set it all up for when he'd come back? But one look at all the disgusted, horrified looks on the faces of the soldiers cleaning up was enough to let him know that it wasn't joke. So why was Gon smiling happily?

"Killua Zoldyck?"

Killua turned around numbly, looking up into the face of none other than Brigadier General Hisoka. Hisoka looked as satisfied as a cat who'd just gotten a dish of milk. His eyes flickered to Gon and the smile grew. Killua glanced back, making sure Gon was fine with Kaito, before following Hisoka. If he disobeyed, it was possible Hisoka could report him and… he didn't know. He had no idea how much power Hisoka held within the military. Maybe Hisoka could even get him kicked off of Gon's squad.

"Gon~ Quite the anomaly, isn't he?"

Hisoka stopped when they were far enough away that Gon and Kaito wouldn't be able to hear him. He tapped his bottom lip thoughtfully with one long, slender finger. Killua waited edgily, on guard. What was Hisoka trying to say?

"Let me tell you something, something about that cute little boy that everyone probably knows but ignores. He was raised on the wildness of the world, and spending that kind of time alone means he's seen more death than anyone. Oh no, I don't mean the death of humans~ He's seen predators slaughter prey, animals battle over food and territory, young cubs die because their parents were torn apart. Without even knowing it, he's probably become accustomed to brutalities even you can't imagine. He doesn't see it as wrong. He doesn't see anything as wrong. He simply sees it as a way of living."

There was a lengthy pause as Killua processed was what being said. It was as if the Brigadier General was suggesting that Gon didn't have… Killua's eyes widened a fraction. Why had Gon joined the war? To find his father. What had been his reaction when he'd killed soldiers? There really hadn't been one. What if… what if it wasn't innocence? The kid had never had his guard up even once. Yet, no one had taken advantage of him the way Killua had expected. Tonpa had tried, but only because Gon was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Anyone who knew the cheerful idiot had never once tried anything. Hisoka smirked as if he knew exactly what Killua was thinking.

"May I ask you something? What do you get when you cross an animal with a human?"

Killua swallowed, feeling a kind of nervousness. He didn't want to hear it. He didn't want to hear about something he probably already knew deep down. That there was something… off about his lover.

"…What are you getting at?"

"When you cross an animal with a human, you get an animal with emotions, feelings, ambitions, and brains. You get an animal with a higher survival rate, who will use all of their cunning and wit to escape death. They keep their fundamental wildness, but they become more self-aware and thus they use that to keep them alive. Slaughtering children? It isn't a cruelty. They know that if they allow a child to grow after killing its parents, the child will grow in hate and try to kill them. It isn't sadism, it's survival instinct."

True enough. Survival instinct… was that what Gon had? Was that what Hisoka was suggesting? It made sense—he'd had to fend for himself a lot on the island, despite being raised by nice people. It was just his way to get into troubling and dangerous situations. Even so, it was okay. It was okay if Gon chose survival instinct over morality. As long as Killua was there to—

But Hisoka wasn't finished yet.

"But… what do you get when you cross a human with an animal? Isn't it obvious~? An animal who no longer fears death as the end. A human who doesn't know what morality is. And that means… why, that means you get a monster."

The statement took Killua's breath away in a way it shouldn't have. It was as if someone had punched him in the gut, and he almost felt a need to double over and try to hold the terrible feeling growing inside of him down. A monster. There were many, many people who were monsters. Serial killers, rapists, arsonists, bombers… but none of them were quite the same type of monster Hisoka was suggesting.

"I saw that in him the first day he walked on board. When I walked up to him, do you know what I saw in his eyes? Excitement. He could sense what I was, and it excited him to dance with danger. Even if he lies to you, even if he lies to himself, those eyes can't lie to me~ He's a true monster. I wonder… hm… I suppose he even terrifies me. But that makes it all the more exciting. He and I have more in common than you want to believe."

Killua's eyes flickered over to the boy talking animatedly to Kaito. He was laughing, a large grin on his face despite the gruesome scene of body after body being carted out of the village behind him. He didn't even seem to acknowledge it; when he looked around, it was as if he were looking through it. Looking through his own carnage with an air of nonchalance. Wearing the smile he always wore. Gon was… a monster?

"He's not like you."

Killua's voice was heated, filled with vehemence. No, he wasn't a monster. He was different than everyone else, but he wasn't a monster. He hadn't killed for fun, he'd killed because he was angry and worried. And the children… that was…

"Maybe he is, maybe he isn't. But if you think he can be satisfied with a happy life and home, I'm afraid you're wrong. He'll never be satisfied~ All you have to do is look at his lineage. His father gave up raising a child to satiate his lust for adventure. His grandfather gave up everything to travel to lands unknown to satiate a desire for wildness. You can try to hold onto him as hard as you can, but in the end a normal life will destroy him. In the end, he will always choose his animal side over you~"

"You're wrong!"

Killua's shout was so loud that everyone in the village paused in their removal of bodies to stare at him. He was shaking in anger, his nails bringing blood out on his palms from crescent-shaped cuts, as he glared at Hisoka.

"You're wrong."

The volume of his voice was lower, but the intensity was just as great. It had to be wrong. Hisoka didn't know Gon the way Killua did. He thought he knew but he didn't. Gon may kill, he may not understand morality, he may act animalistic, but he wasn't a monster. And even if he didn't want to settle down, even if he needed to travel forever just because that was who he was… it didn't matter. It was fine. They'd just deal with it, the way they dealt with everything else.

"Kil, you shouldn't yell at the Brigadier General when you aren't even a Private yet."

Killua froze. His blood turned to ice as he turned slowly, his face paling when he saw the familiar, blank-eyed face behind him. Why? Why was hehere? He should be out with Silva and Zeno, finding some enemy base and killing the way he always did. Yet he was here. If he found out… if he found out about Gon and Killua's relationship…

"Illumi… What are you doing here?"

"Ah! Well, I was worried about my adorable little brother. I've been here the whole time, even since the ship."

Since… since that long ago? Then just how much did the raven-haired man know? Did he know everything already? Killua searched his memories, wondering if he'd ever even caught a glimpse of Illumi before this moment. No. Of course not; if Illumi didn't want to be seen, he wouldn't be seen. It was very possible he knew everything. Killua prepared himself for Illumi knowing, but prayed he didn't.

"Ah! I've seen you! You were with Hisoka on the ship!"

Gon. At the worst possible time, as usual. He must've been curious about what Killua was yelling at, so he'd come over. Only to come face-to-face with Illumi. Gon studied Illumi, his eyes bright with a curiosity that was also reflected in Illumi's eyes, though Illumi's curiosity seemed much more threatening. Killua glanced over to where Gon had been talking to Kaito, but the man was nowhere to be seen. This was bad. Illumi extended a hand, and for a second Killua thought he saw a flash of some emotion in his eyes.

"I'm Killua's older brother, Illumi. Nice to meet you."

Gon glanced between Killua and Illumi, his brow wrinkling as he extended his hand. Wait… that flash in Illumi's eyes… Killua grabbed the back of Gon's shirt and pulled him away a second quick enough as a knife flashed through the air, drawing blood from the bridge of Gon's nose. No doubt Illumi would've taken one or both eyes if Killua had been even a millisecond too late. Shit. This was really bad. No one would pay attention if Illumi and Hisoka were both involved, even if the older men tried to kill the younger. And the way Illumi emotionlessly brandished the knife and crouched down, it was obvious he was planning to kill at least one of them.

"The war's almost over and when it is, we want Kil back. I've watched you so I know you won't give up being his friend. I've come to the conclusion that the only way to take him back is to kill you."

Gon's eyes widened as Killua shoved him back, placing himself between the bewildered kid and his brother. Like hell. He probably wouldn't be able to beat Illumi, but…

"Kil, move."

He clenched his teeth, glaring stubbornly at Illumi. No, there was no way. He'd never once disobeyed his older brother, but he'd never once felt so strongly about someone either. If Illumi wanted Gon, he'd have to go through Killua. Illumi let out a sigh and toyed with his knife, flipping it over his wrist and around his hand. Hisoka, who had stepped back, crossed his arms and watched through slit eyes. Killua had no idea what he was thinking, but he had no time to contemplate on it as Illumi moved with a lightning speed, his hand flashing out and smashing Killua straight in the face before Killua could react.

Killua must've flown four feet to the side, and the bitter tang of blood coated his mouth. He spat, his head turning frantically. He wanted to get up, to run as fast as he could to try and stop his older brother, but it was too late. Illumi stood over Gon, looking down at him blankly.

"I don't see why everyone's making such a fuss over you. You're just a stupid kid. Not even fit to lick my younger brother's feet."

He brought the knife down, straight at Gon's face. Killua screamed, desperately running even though he knew he wouldn't make it, and Hisoka watched with an unreadable look on his face.

"I'll kill you."

Illumi's knife stopped, hovering a millimetre above Gon's eye. If he so much as trembled, it would bury itself through the soft membrane, and another tremble would sink it into Gon's skull. But Illumi never shook, and now he quirked an eyebrow, his mouth twitching.

"What?"

The voice had even stopped Killua in his tracks, and he watched, his mind working as quick as it could to find a solution to the situation. …There was none. Gon would lose his eye if Illumi decided it. But…

Gon's eyes were as blank as Illumi's as he looked up at the military assassin.

"I'll kill you."

The way it was said… the absolute certainty and lack of any emotion in Gon's voice sent a shiver down Killua's spine. Gon didn't seem bothered in the least that he was only the smallest fraction of time and space away from getting his eye sliced open like a grape. He stared into Illumi's eyes and Illumi stared into his. It seemed like it was taking hours, days, weeks, for anyone to move. And then, slowly, silently, Illumi drew the knife back. His hand was graceful as he set the point on Gon's forehead.

"I wonder if everyone's observations were justified after all."

Gon reached up and wrapped his fingers around the hand holding the knife. Illumi blinked in surprise, his eyes widening. Killua drew in a sharp breath as Gon pressed it into his head, blood trickling down his face. Even Hisoka uncrossed his arms and took a step forward as Gon continuously pulled the knife further into his skin. The trickle of blood was becoming a steady stream. Illumi blinked owlishly then tried to pull his hand back. He pulled harder and harder and harder, but Gon refused to let go.

"Gon, stop."

Killua managed to find his voice and he spoke up, the sound coming out in a dry rasp.

"He wants to take you away, Killua. He wants to make you go back. I won't let them make you do things you don't want again."

There was a loud crack that made Killua jump. His brows knit together as he saw the slightest twitch on Illumi's face. Holy shit. Gon had just broken his older brother's hand.

A slow, sick grin crawled over Hisoka's face and he ran his tongue over his lips. He'd known. He'd known Illumi wouldn't kill Gon, and he'd let this happen. Ah, Gon~ He wanted to know just how far Gon would go if pushed, and he had a feeling the show was about to start. Illumi had experience, but Gon had something far more intangible, something that made him almost more dangerous. A fighting instinct that he had no problem giving into. The way the two squared off turned Hisoka on to a wicked degree.

"I know, I know, but he won't. If he wanted to, he would've done it already. He just wants to see what you'll do."

Killua kept his voice light, inching towards the two. Illumi watched Gon, his interest growing more. Killua could see his other hand inching towards the belt concealed by his military jacket. He was going to really try to kill Gon, and whether the boy could block him or not, he wouldn't stop until one of them was dead.

"I'll show him what I'd do then. I'll kill him."

Illumi's hand flashed, and Gon leapt back, the tip of the knife slicing through the top of his hair. Now Illumi held a knife in each hand, though the one Gon had held was horribly mangled, crushed and twisted in a way that looked excessively painful. Gon crouched like a cat about to spring, blank eyes watching Illumi's every move. Illumi sighed, dropping the knife from his mangled hand and brandishing the one in his good hand.

"Gon, listen to me. Listen, okay? I know you're upset, but it's okay. I won't leave and Illumi won't do anything. Just calm down. You don't need to fight."

Gon's eyes flickered in Killua's direction a bit. That was it. Just a little more.

"We're in this together, right? And I promised I wouldn't leave your side. So I won't. Okay? I won't go back to them, and no one can make me. Come on, my mouth hurts. I need you to look at it and make sure I haven't lost any teeth. Please?"

Gon slowly straightened and turned to look at him, the strange look fading from his eyes. Killua held his gaze, lowering his voice and speaking softly, imploringly, ignoring everything else. As far as he was concerned, it was just the two of them in the village. No one and nothing else mattered.

"You won't do anything, right? I need you here, so don't go off and get into trouble. I need you here with me. Don't lose yourself. Please, Gon, I love you. You know I do. Isn't that enough?"

Gon nodded, a small smile breaking out over his face. He opened his mouth to answer and Illumi lunged. Killua moved at the same time, pushing his body more than he'd ever thought he could. Closer, closer… he wasn't going to make it.

"Gon!"

But then he had crashed into his lover and took him down, clutching him tightly as they rolled, dust puffing up into the sky. Killua glanced over his shoulder; there was no way he should've beaten Illumi. But what he saw baffled him. Hisoka stood above Illumi, his hand digging into Illumi's arm hard enough to leave angry red marks.

"Not today. He isn't strong enough yet."

Hisoka glanced over at Killua and Gon, his face looking mildly annoyed.

"If you think love will stop him from being what he is, you're wrong. He only barely came back this time. Next time, I doubt you'll be able to do anything."

But the look of annoyance on Hisoka's face was enough to assure him that Hisoka hadn't expected anything to be able to stop Gon. Killua looked down at Gon, who was looking up at him with an unguarded expression of worry. Before Killua could say anything, Gon reached up and took Killua's face, gesturing for him to open his mouth. Killua obliged, and Gon studied the inside of Killua's mouth with a frown. The gentleness in his hands and concern on his face made Killua wonder if he'd imagined the entire thing.

"My, my. Mother and Father will be heartbroken. They want you to carry on the bloodline, Kil. Being with another man is fine for fun, but love? I'm sure you'll be hearing from them soon."

Illumi extracted himself from Hisoka, brushing himself off with his usual nonchalance. Then he turned and walked away, his one hand dangling crookedly at his side. Hisoka hesitated, looking at the two boys, then gave them both a smile that promised disgusting things and followed Illumi.

"Killua… what did Hisoka mean by 'what he is?' What am I?"

Gon released Killua's face after making sure no teeth were broken or falling out. His eyes were clear, full of light and innocence and childish curiosity. This was the Gon he knew and loved. The other Gon…

"You're mine."

No, there was no other Gon. This one just had a darkness he rarely expressed. But Killua knew what darkness was, and he didn't care if he had to look it in the face. He'd always thought he needed Gon. He needed him, but Gon didn't need anybody. That was how it had been. However, right now, more than anything, it was Gon who needed Killua. They needed each other. If that's how it was, Killua didn't care. He would love all of Gon, darkness and light.

"You're a lot of things. You're this army's teammate, Ging's kid, Mito's son, Leorio and Kurapika's friend, and my soulmate. But in the end, you're Gon. You're you. No matter what that means, we'll all be by your side. So don't worry about, okay?"

Gon thought about that for a second, then beamed and pecked Killua on the lips.

"Okay. And you don't worry either, Killua, because you're all of those things too. I mean, you're not Ging's kid or Aunt Mito's son, oh and you aren't your own soulmate, but maybe someday you can be their kid too? And you're my soulmate! And…"

Gon started rambling on, the conversation getting more and more confused as he talked. But it didn't matter; Killua listened to everything he said and tried his best to respond. In the end, they both gave up on it, and they walked out of the carnage hand in hand, mostly unscathed and laughing.

A/N: Yeah another chapter because I'm trash who doesn't study for my midterms.

GhouliGhost- HOT WEATHER? I'm actually going to hunt you down it's -31 here fuuuuuuu I need more hot scenes to warm up my freezing bones *yells thank you as I get dragged away by the cops, but you'll have to pay my bail because I'm neglecting work and it's your fault I'm in jail*

centuku- Yes, twas an absolutely WONDERFUL cupcake *dances* Thank youuu! I made you a cake but... Killua ate it... little shit ;'(

kittenrocs- THANK YOU! I'm glad you're enjoying it X3 Okie dokie I updated it hahaha I really shouldn't be writing so much but w/e I'll probably finish another chap tonight or tomorrow