What Might Have Been
Chapter three:
Eiri's POV:
Today I moved back to Japan with Seguchi. He wanted me to move in with my family, but I refused—it's bad enough being here, I'm not making it worse by living with them. I'm a grown man, not a child.
Thus Seguchi got me my own apartment in Tokyo, a large and spacious one. I don't know how much money he spent on it, quite a bit—I feel guilty until I remember how rich he is. He owns his own company, not to mention used to be part of a famous band that broke up three years ago.
"So Eiri, how do you like the place so far?"
"It's okay." Actually it feels great but I don't tell him that—being able to have my own place somewhat makes up for being back in Japan. "It's big."
"Yes, it is quite spacious, only the best for my brother-in-law." He smiled until he turned serious and studied me. "Now, are you sure you'll be okay by yourself? You won't cut, will you?"
"I won't." I say that but who knows if something won't seduce me into cutting—anything could entice me, especially if I have a flashback. During my flashbacks the cutting's worse—often I'm not even aware of what I do, that frightens me but I don't tell Seguchi or the therapist.
"There's enough food for tonight, I'll take you shopping tomorrow for more."
"Okay, Seguchi."
I smile back to him, I no longer type in front of him—I kept getting tired of him looking over my shoulder and reading what I write. Ever since he learned about my legs he's been looking for secrets in my typing—but I no longer keep my writing easy to find. I think that frustrates him.
"Well, see you tomorrow. Bye Eiri."
"Bye Seguchi."
He leaves and now I'm alone—finally. I catch up on typing before going to get something to eat. There are mainly bowls of instant noodles, not much else—plus some milk and soda. Nothing difficult to make or alcoholic to drink….I guess he doesn't know I learned to cook at Yuki's, same with drinking.
Yuki always loves to drink—wine, beer…anything really as long as it contained alcohol. But he never drank too much in front of me—he almost seemed afraid to, especially if I drank too. I still don't know why; guess it's one of those mysteries like why he looks guiltily at me sometimes.
I wonder if he blames himself for what happened as it happened while I was at his place….maybe that's it. I'll need to ask him about it one of these days—if I ever can talk to him again. I don't think the phone Seguchi set up here can call overseas….
"Yuki….I miss you already, please come to visit soon…."
A/N: End chapter