"And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsmen came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulchre
In this kingdom by the sea."
-Edgar Allan Poe, "Annabel Lee", Stanza 3
Its two o'clock in the morning and Antonio is just now starting the last paragraph of his research paper. It's no surprise, really, that it's taken him this long to get most of it finished. Antonio's mind has always had a tendency to wander onto things that it shouldn't, especially when he needed to get something done. He half-wishes that Lovino was with him, but he knows that then he really wouldn't get anything done.
He stops typing in favor of thinking about his lover. A smile subconsciously makes its way onto his face as he thinks about Lovino. He glances at his phone, remembering that Lovino was supposed to call him when he was done at his grandfather's house. Antonio wonders for a second on what's taken him so long, but settles on the idea that he probably just stayed the night, as his parents went on a trip out of town. He knows that Lovino doesn't like being in an empty house, after all.
Antonio squares his shoulders and starts to type again, excited that his paper is a few minutes from being done. The house phone rings, though, and he pauses to listen for his mother. She does get up, fortunately, and he hears her pad across the hardwood floor of the hall to get the phone. He resumes typing again, starting on his last sentence.
"Antonio, honey? Are you awake?" His mother calls. Her voice is shaky, and she sounds like she's about to cry.
"I'm awake," he replies back. He stands up and rushes towards his door. After opening it, Antonio sees his mother, standing with the phone still in her hand. Her face is a mixture between shock and pure sadness, something that makes his heart lurch. "Mom, what's wrong?"
"It's Lovino, honey," she whispers. "He got into a car accident on his way home. He's in the hospital." His eyes widen before he races past her and grabs his car keys.
"I'll be back soon," is the last thing he says before exiting the house. Antonio climbs into the car and drives out—probably at a speed too fast for his own good. His fingers tap on the steering wheel the whole way, his mind whirling with the thousands of things that could happen to Lovino, along with memories of past family members that had died from the same thing. His father had died from a car accident, with his mother being the only survivor.
The hospital leers at him once he parks. To him, hospitals bring death and sadness, and it's really the last place that he wants to be. He needs to be there, though, because he would never forgive himself if something happened to his lover and he wasn't there.
A woman sits at the front desk, obviously tired from the third shift. He practically races up there and breathlessly asks, "Lovino Vargas, where is he? He was in a car accident, I need to see him."
"I'm sorry, but visiting hours are only during the day," she replies. He slams his hands down on the clerk's counter, effectively getting her full attention. "Okay!" She types something into her computer before speaking again. "Its room 203, but he's in surgery." Antonio's gone before the clerk can even continue telling him that he can't go.
The only way that he can see into the room is a small window at the top of the door. He's barely tall enough to look in, but what he sees terrifies him. Lovino is laying there, bloody and broken, surrounded by various people clad in green scrubs.
"Toni," someone says softly behind him. It's Feliciano, sitting there with a sad and somber expression. Feli looks out of place in this hospital, and it's eerie to see him with such a face. "He's not going to make it." Antonio feels angry, since his mind is still racing at 100 miles per hour. How could Feliciano, Lovino's own brother, be so calm in this situation? "Please, just sit down."
Finally giving in, he sits in the seat beside the Italian. "What happened?"
"I don't want to talk about it," Feli whispers, and that's when he notices that tear tracks on his cheeks and the messiness of his hair.
Antonio grabs his hand and decides not to say anything, even though on the inside he needs to know what happened or he feels he'll explode.
God? He thinks. Are you up there? Please, just let him be alright.
He must have fallen asleep, because when he opens his eyes sun is streaming through the hospital's windows and his head is on Feliciano's shoulder. For a moment, it's tranquil. The visible dust in the rays of sunlight float through the air and dance together. Feli's breathing is deep and even, almost lulling him back to sleep. His surroundings seem to whisper to him, telling him to fall back asleep, into a world where everything's alright.
Antonio shakes off the tendrils of sleep, however, and stands up. Once his blood his moving, his nerves feel like they're on fire and he can't set a single thought straight. He needs his medication, he really does, but he feels that it would be unfair to Lovino, to leave for something that only benefits himself.
Lovino. He needs to know what happened, if his boyfriend is okay, if he's alive. He walks up to the room that he looked into previously and looks again, hoping to whatever power in heaven there is that his lover's okay. He breathes a sigh of relief when he sees the familiar figure, but something tells him that he's not okay. Emerald eyes follow the several cords situated on the bed, which lead to a large machine with various numbers displayed.
"You can go in, if you'd like," a female voice says from behind him. "He's not very responsive, but…" She trails off. Antonio twists the handle slowly, afraid that entering the room will make this situation somehow more real.
Lovino's hands are cold, he notes when he grabs them, which is weird because his slender hands were always warm. It crushes him on the inside to see his lover like this, broken and dying on a hospital bed. What would he give to see those hazel eyes again?
"What's your relation to the patient?" The doctor asks, making Antonio jump a bit. He hadn't realized that she was still here. "Sorry. I have to know, though, otherwise you can't actually be in here."
"I'm his boyfriend," he says softly, a small break occurring in his speech. His throat feels closed up, and he's not sure if he really ever wants to speak again.
"O-Oh," she replies. "I'll just leave you two. I'll send the other boy in when he wakes. Once his parent or guardian gets here, we can talk about what happened." He nods, and she finally walks out of the room.
Hot tears start to stream down his face, and he wonders why bad things have to happen to people who did nothing wrong. Lovino didn't deserve this.
"His brain is swelling at a rate we can't control," the doctor says. Lovino's grandfather finally arrived, as their parents had gone out of town and couldn't be reached. The three of them—Antonio, Feliciano, and Romulus—listen with rapt attention. "We don't—well, we don't think he'll last another night, if it continues like this. I'm sorry," she whispers before exiting the room.
For the next hour, the only thing that can be heard in the white room is sobs and curses.
Antonio's mom swings by and sits with them for a little while. She brought them all food, which was something that he would've appreciated—if he had actually felt like eating. His mind feels like its shut off. Normally, this would've felt like paradise, but all he feels is numbness and the only thing that floats around in his head is the knowledge that Lovino is going to die.
Right now, he's clutching Lovino's hand, something that he's been doing on and off all day. He begs him to wake up, to smile, to laugh, to curse. Anything if it meant life.
"Toni," his mom whispers. "Maybe you should get some rest. Take a shower and change, honey. He'll be here when you get back, I promise you."
"You can't promise that!" He snaps. "Lovino could die any second now and I can't—I would never forgive myself if I was at home taking a shower instead of right here when that happens."
She sighs and gives his shoulder a squeeze before leaving.
The funeral is nice, filled with lots of people. Gilbert and Francis are there, but Antonio doesn't really feel like talking to them. All he can look at is the ebony coffin being lowered down and covered up with dirt, sealing away his love forever.
The ceremony flits by, and many people speak. He himself was offered to, also, but he refused. It wouldn't feel right, he thinks, to talk about Lovino like no one was ever going to think about him ever again.
Antonio is the last one there. He sits down beside the fresh dirt and reads the tomb over and over again. It's fitting that they buried him by their beach, since it was his favorite spot to be. His mind continues to whirl, and even though it's all about Lovino, he can't stop thinking about a million different things at once and it's starting to make his head hurt. The medication bottle on his counter hasn't been touched in three days, and he doesn't plan on taking them anytime soon.
When he stands up again, his nice black pants are dirty and his eyes are red. "What would Lovino say if he saw me right now," he dryly chuckles. He supposes it doesn't matter, though, because Lovino isn't here to tell him.
"The angels, not half so happy in Heaven,
Went envying her and me—
Yes!—that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee."
-Edgar Allan Poe, "Annabel Lee", Stanza 4