This one was weird to write, I'm going to be honest...
So I wrote it as if it were an actual video and I'm not sure how that went... Anyway, Alastair and Rhys are in London to visit their mother, (They don't live there, as soon as Arthur moved out Alastair moved to Scotland with his girlfriend, and Rhys moved to Wales, both of them rather eager to get back to the places they called 'home' as young children) and Arthur and Francis decided to take advantage of the fact they were there. Arthur, Alistair, and Rhys aren't actually blood related, but were all adopted by the same parents when they were the ages of 6, 9, and 8 respectively, (There was a fourth boy in the house named Seamus but he left home and moved to Ireland as soon as he was old enough and doesn't have much contact with any of them anymore beside the occasional grudging birthday or christmas card)...
Is that everything? I think so, I'm sorry if Scotland's and Wales' characterizations are a little off, I couldn't really decide how to portray them.
Enjoy ;)
"Wake up sleepyhead," Francis cooed, making the man on the other side of the bed groan and roll over, away from the too-cheerful voice of the Frenchman, and the too-bright early morning sunlight that was streaming through the open curtains.
Francis chuckled and moved around the bed, pointing the camera at the lump in the covers that was Arthur's head, "Réveille-toi, we're filming the video today."
Arthur's head peeked out from the covers, his thick eyebrows pinched together, "I know it's a 'day in the life', but do you really need to film me waking up?" he said, his voice gravely with sleep.
"I have sworn to document the whole day, and this is important."
Arthur just rolled his eyes and yawned, swatting at the camera irritably, "Fine, just turn that bloody thing off so I can get dressed."
"Here we observe the Cheesy Frogus in its natural habitat," Arthur said in his best impression of David Attenborough, zooming the camera in from where he stood in the kitchen doorway.
Francis turned away from the hob and the omelette he was cooking with a dry expression of general unamusement, making Arthur stifle a laugh through his hand, "Would you look at that! It appears to have noticed me," he continued.
"Arthur."
"I think it's trying to communicate,"
"Arthur."
"Perhaps I can attempt to make contact with this strange creature."
"Arthur!"
"Oh, it seems to be getting aggressive!"
"Arth-!"
"So, Francis, tell the dear viewers what we have planned for today."
Francis reclined on the small wooden chair, swallowing his own piece of omelette before speaking, "Well, you have to record a video, then we were going to go out to meet your brothers," at this Arthur made a noise of disgust from behind the camera, by Francis continued on regardless, "Have lunch, and knowing you, fish someone's shoes out of the Thames..."
"That happened once!"
"What about that time you got high and-"
"Okay! Yes! I get it!"
Francis smiled smugly, "Anyway, then we're going to come home and probably relax for the rest of the day..."
Arthur turned the camera on himself, "I apologize for our boring lives. With any luck the couple of hours with my brothers will provide enough content for a video."
"You're so pessimistic."
"Your point?"
"Nothing."
"Arthur! We need to go!"
"Wait just a bloody minute, my brothers can take care of themselves for the time it takes me to find a ruddy scarf!"
"I'm not sure they can."
"Yeah, well, if they can't, you're bailing them out this time!"
"Not a chance!"
"Alistair," Arthur said, a look of pure derision on his face, perfectly mirrored in his voice, "Why don't you tell us and our lovely viewers what just happened?"
He turned the camera on his brother, who's wet and dripping hair was clinging to his face and equally wet and dripping clothes, "I'll have you know that this was not my fault!" he protested, while Rhys snickered from beside him.
"We were literally two minutes late. How did you manage to do something stupid already?"
"Shut it!" Rhys chuckled, "You wanted him to tell the story didn't you?"
"There's no story to tell!" Alistair protested, "This arse tipped his drink over me!"
"You deserved it!"
"How? What did I possibly do?"
"You left your fucking used condom in-"
Arthur made a noise that can only be described as an 'I do not even slightly want to hear the rest of that sentence' noise, and turned the camera on himself, "Okay, that's enough of this conversation!"
"So we dared Allie to try to catch a pigeon." Rhys said, turning the camera on the park, where the large, red-haired Scotsman was attempting to be stealthy enough to sneak up on a large swarm of pigeons.
"The nutter actually agreed." Arthur said amusedly.
"I think his pride is still hurt from the drink incident." Rhys replied.
"He's going to hurt himself." Francis added mournfully.
"Oh lighten up Francis." Rhys laughed, "If he does hurt himself it'll make a good video at least."
Francis made a sceptical noise.
Just afterwards Alistair jumped at the pigeons, scattering them and causing a huge plume of them to take off, so that he fell flat on his face with nothing to show for it.
The camera shook as uproarious laughter erupted from all three of the other men.
"What an utter pillok."
"How's your hot chocolate Artie?" Alistair asked, a teasing edge to his words.
"Lovely, thank you." Arthur snapped back, taking a tentative sip and scowling pointedly at his brother.
The camera was turned around, to the smirking faces of the Englishman's brothers, "Francis insisted we go to Starbucks, and little Artie doesn't like coffee, so-"
"Well I'm sorry I don't like bitter bean juice!" Arthur snapped.
"Starbucks is about as far from bitter as you can get." Rhys replied, raising an eyebrow.
"He's right," Francis added, "Really, if you can't drink Starbucks then-"
"Oh belt up Francis, you don't like tea!"
"That's because I like my drinks to have flavour."
"What tea have you been drinking?"
"Yours, and in four years I have yet to find one that tastes better than a good latte."
"I refuse to believe...!"
Alistair and Rhys were just staring into the camera with matching, 'we have to deal with this way too fucking often' expressions, "They may be a while." Said Alistair, "We'll cut to when they're finished."
The camera was turned on Arthur, a deep scowl on his face, staring intently at something off-camera.
"Look at him." Alistair snickered.
"I think he's going to explode." Rhys agreed, snorting slightly, "He's practically turning green."
The camera panned a little, to Francis who was chatting with a small group of girls, a charming and flirty smile on his face.
"I swear he does this on purpose." Rhys said amusedly.
"There's no way he doesn't know." Alistair replied.
"Is he signing her chest?"
"He's signing her chest."
"Francis!"
"Oh shit, he's done it now."
"When we get home I buying you a bloody chastity belt."
"No need to overreact, Arthur."
"Really? I'm overreacting?"
"I only-"
"Signed her bloody tits!"
"She didn't have any paper."
"You couldn't have- For fucks sake! You know what, whatever."
And then Arthur stalked off to the sounds of his brother's laughter, and pitiful noises of Francis running after him.
"So we lost Artie and Francis." Rhys said, "We've been walking around for about an hour with no sign of them."
"We think they might have gone home for make-up sex." Alistair added.
"Yeah, and we don't want to walk in on that, so we thought we'd wait until one of them calls us to give the all clear, so we can give them back their camera. In the meantime we thought we'd just hi-jack their vlog and go to some kind of cheesy tourist destination because we have nothing better to do."
"I mean we could go to the pub, but they'd probably whinge at us if we didn't do anything interesting."
"And the London Eye is interesting?"
The camera was pointed at the London Eye, zooming randomly in and out as the man operating it tried to get it to focus on the white wheel rather than the white sky.
"This is so dull."
"Tell me something I didn't know already."
"Well, I did expect it to do at least something noteworthy."
"It's a giant fucking Ferris Wheel! What noteworthy things could it possibly do?"
"I heard it lights up or something."
"It's the middle of the bloody day, what did you expect?"
"So we met this lovely bloke, Charlie over here." Rhys said, turning the camera to a man dressed as a black and white Charlie Chaplin, who waved and beckoned him over, "And he wanted to be a part of the vlog, so," he turned and positioned the three of them were in the shot together, "Here you go Charlie!" and all three of them flashed winning smiles at the camera.
"Do you think we should call them?" Rhys asked through his 99.
"Nah, mid-sex Artie isn't something I want to hear, over the phone or any other time."
"It's not like they'd keep going while we're on the phone."
"Well there was one time when he was-"
The screen cut to black, a picture of Arthur's scowl plastered across the centre, and text reading 'for the sake of my love-life I'm going to cut this bit' across the bottom whilst elevator music played in the background.
"So no call then?"
"I'd rather just wait."
"So Rhys was a complete idiot and forgot to turn off the camera, so we're out of battery."
"I refuse to take blame for this."
"You were the one with the camera, it's your fault!"
"I hardy th-"
"So that was our 'day in the life' video." Francis said, his face lit only by his computer monitor. "I'm sorry it couldn't have been more conventional, and less Arthur and myself being in an argument, but he really is too funny not to mess with." He chuckled a little.
"Anyway, I just finished editing this together, and thought it needed an end note, so, this is just me saying thank you for watching and à bientôt!"
Arthur is a little baby who can't drink coffee, and Francis is a coffee snob (You can fight me on this)
The Charlie Chaplin I mentioned is a 'living statue' guy that hangs out quite a bit around the Eye, I've seen him when I visited recently, and he's actually rather cool, we even took a selfie together ;D
A 99 is a type of ice-cream for those who don't know. (But honestly, who doesn't at this point)