I do not own the characters of Teen Wolf. I only own this idea. Reviews are appreciated. I love to know what you think. I only own the characters I have created for the purpose of this story.
Stiles slowly turned around to face the Alpha, his eyes full of concern but his eyebrows were raised high in shock. He closed the cupboard doors with shaking hands before he sat down across the table from the wolf, his hands clasped tightly in front of himself.
"The shock is written all over your face, Stiles. Spit out whatever it is you have to say, and I highly suggest you say it while the house is empty." said Derek with a level voice as he locked his eyes on the teen, eyebrows raised high as if in a challenge. He was provoking the teen to say whatever it was that he needed to.
"How could you even think of doing this to yourself? What's the point behind it? How does it even start? What goes through your head when you start a binge, or doing a binge, even before and after you purge. Why in the hell would you do this to yourself?" asked Stiles as he brought his hand down sharply onto the table, sharp enough to startle the wolf across from him.
"I ask myself that question almost every single day. Why I do this to myself, why I don't just stop? Why I choose this instead of just talking about it? There is no answer for it Stiles, there is no answer for any of those questions. This is a lot harder and a lot bigger than some simple little answer can ever conclude. It doesn't just simply start some day and it doesn't just simply stop one day, it builds and builds, and it takes time to fully overcome. Nobody would ever wake up one day and choose to put themselves through an agonizing hell. Before and during a binge, it can start out like a normal meal, not really planned out, you just eat whatever comes to your mind. During a binge, you're completely out of control. It's like being on autopilot. It's just one food after another, you don't care what it is or how you got your hands on it and you can never seem to get it in fast enough. By the time you snap out of autopilot, you realize what you've done and you're not able to handle it. When you start to purge, it's starting to purge out and release whatever emotion you're feeling, whatever you're not able to say, whatever you wish you had the strength to say or the strength to do. It's release." explained Derek, just saying word after word without thinking of what he was saying or how he wanted it to get across.
"Keep going. Don't you dare stop now." urged Stiles with a stern voice as he leveled his gaze with the older teen, who had shook his head a bit at him.
"Stiles, I don't –." started the wolf before he was cut off by the younger teen, who's voice was sharper than before.
"Keep. Going." ground out the teen as he crossed his arms over his chest, watching as the Alpha bit at his bottom lip, his eyes darting around the top of the table as he seemed to battle the decision that was put in front of him.
"I wasn't lying when I said that it was agony and hell, not only to the person who is dealing with it, but to the people around that person. It all depends on what happened that day to what you do that night. Whether you fast, or your binge and purge, or you exercise until you can't move. Whether you fight it or you give into it. You can't sleep, because you know the minute you close your eyes is the minute everything starts again. It's like your mind hits the replay button, only it's twice as worse as before. You cover up every mirror with a towel and every surface that could possibly show your reflection is something that you avoid. Not because of the voices in your head, but because you can't stand to see what is facing you back in that reflection. You can't believe what you've done to yourself, yet, it's not enough of a scare to get you to stop. You just keep going. Another day without food, another hour on the treadmill, another meal to plan and another calorie to cut out. I remember nights when I was that weak from starvation and over exercising, that it took everything in me to make it up the stairs in order to just drop into bed. I remember nights where Laura would come into my bedroom, drop to her knees, and beg for answers or beg me to stop. She'd beg and plead and cry for me to stop, and I wouldn't. I would just keep going. She'd come into the bedroom when she thought I was asleep and she'd check my pulse, just to make sure that I was alive and that she would see me in the morning again. I'm done talking, Stiles. I'm done." continued Derek before he rose to his feet with tears pooling in his eyes, making a quick escape out the back door and off the porch. Stiles didn't realize what he had done until it was too late for him to even think of catching up with the wolf.
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Stiles was still glued to his seat at the kitchen table, with his head in his hands by the time the remainder of the Pack had returned. He knew he had made a mistake, he pushed the wolf too far and now had no idea of where he was or what he was doing.
"Hey, man. What do you look so upset about? Things with Derek didn't go as planned?" asked Scott in confusion as he sat down in the seat that Derek used to occupy, sliding the food out of the way. Allison and Lydia flanked him while the rest of the Pack had scattered across the living room, thrown across the furniture or on the floor.
"It didn't go as planned at all." whispered Stiles as he ran his hand through his hair, a guilty look in his eyes as he kept his gaze locked on the table top.
"What happened?" asked the golden eyed Beta as he leaned back in his chair a bit, his eyes never leaving his best friend. Stiles didn't have a chance to respond before Allison joined the conversation with a sharp "What did you do?!".
"I may have pushed Derek a little too far. He really got to talking and was getting a lot off of his chest, so I told him to keep talking. He objected, and I pushed. I had him keep going. By the end of it all, he was in tears and bolted out the back door." explained the teen as he took the risk of finally looking up from the table, meeting three pairs of blazing eyes.
"I warned you, Stiles. You knew not to push and you did it anyway. Do you have any idea at all where he could have went?" asked Allison as she crossed her arms over her chest, eyes blazing darkly in anger. Stiles didn't have the chance to answer before his phone rang from his pocket, his Dad's name flashing across the screen.
Really not a good time, Dad.
Not a good time here, either. You want to tell me why Parrish picked up Derek a little while ago? The guy was just wandering around like he was stuck in his own head. He's not saying much and not looking anybody in the eye, he wandered about two miles out of town.
Crap, I didn't think he'd go that far. Some stuff went down today and it must have taken a toll on him. I'll let everybody know where he is and we'll be up to get him. Just keep an eye on him, okay?
I'm not letting him out of my sight and Parrish hasn't left his side since he brought him in. I'm pretty sure they're falling asleep on each other right now. Parrish pulled a double shift and Derek just looks exhausted.
We'll be there in a few to pick him up.
The call ended and Stiles slid his phone back into his pocket, raising his eyes again to meet those of the three people surrounding the table. He didn't have to be a werewolf to feel the anger that was still rolling off of each of them.
"Parrish picked up Derek about two miles outside of town, brought him in to the station where they're at now. Dad says that he thinks they're both falling asleep on each other, they're practically attached at the hip at the moment. I'll go get him." explained the teen as he rose from his seat, only to slowly sit back down when Lydia leveled a glare at him.
"I'll go get him. Allison, Scott, deal with Stiles while I'm gone. Allison, any advice on how to approach this?" asked the strawberry blonde as she picked her purse back up off of the table.
"Let Derek talk on his own, if he decides to. Don't try and force anything, make small suggestions when it comes to him making a decision. Try and get him to eat something small, it doesn't matter what it is. I'm betting that he hasn't ate anything yet for a while. If he does fall asleep in the car, just let him sleep and we'll figure out something here." explained Allison as she turned to face her best friend. Lydia nodded her head before she spun around and walked out of the kitchen and out of the front door of the house.