"What's going on, Harry?"

"Nothing, just teaching Malfoy here a lesson in manners."

"On the floor?"

"Where else? Come on Malfoy I want a word with you in my common room."

"Ooh! I'm scared now! The Head Boy wants a word with me. How terrifying!"

"Don't mock me Draco. I killed you boss over the summer, just think what I'm gonna do to you!"

Harry took Malfoy by the arm and frog marched him down the hall. Ron stared at Hermione in bewilderment.

"Ok…has Harry lost his mind completely?"

"No, I don't think so. Harry is acting very oddly, but I'm sure there is a logical explanation for his actions."

"No…he's lost his marbles!"

Harry and Draco sniggered quietly as they hid in an alcove not far from the hall.

"Something's going on, and I am going to find out what it is!"

"I hear you Mugsy! Come on Mione. Can't you give Harry just a little bit of peace? Look, I know he's head boy and you're head girl…and I also know about your little thing for him." Hermione looked at him sharply. "Look, I don't mind. Don't blame you either! My point is that you have to give Harry a little leniency. He's not someone to be trapped easily. I mean, he is the most powerful wizard in the world, after all, and you don't want to cross him. He's a complicated guy and he's just as determined as you are. He won't let you find out his secret."

"Do you know what it is?"

He paused. "No. He hasn't told me. And anyway, if he did I wouldn't tell a soul. I'm too scared of what he'd do to me if he found out I betrayed his trust."

Hermione laughed and then linked her arm in his and they started to walk towards the Gryffindor common room.

"Ron, why haven't you had a girlfriend in ages? I don't like seeing you so mopey."

"Because."

"That's not a reason."

"It's a perfectly decent reason. I haven't got one because she won't have me."

"Are you going to tell me who she is?"

"Wait till we get to the common room. Hang on, can I come to your common room? I don't want to be in the Gryffindor one right now."

"Sure, but why?"

"There's someone I'm trying to avoid."

"Who?"

"Ginny."

"What's she done this time? Wait, what have you done this time?"

"It wasn't my fault!"

"You scared away another boyfriend of hers didn't you? You have to stop doing that, Ron. You'll lose your sister, if you're not careful. Trust me you don't want that."

"Why? How would you know? You're an only child."

"I didn't used to be. My sister was younger than me by about three years. She ran away from home because of me. We were about to go into third year and she waited to receive her Hogwarts letter. It never came and she was so disappointed. That summer she ran away from home and I haven't seen her since. My being here drove her away. You need to be careful. You think you've got it bad, with five older brothers? Think how she feels with only brothers, all of which are older than her."

"Ok. Sorry, I didn't know."

"It's ok, I shouldn't have said anything. So what do you reckon is wrong with Harry?"

"You never give up do you? I trust Harry with my life and I trust him to tell us himself, in his own time. I know how much you want to know, believe me I do too. But we need to have patience. He'll tell us, I'm sure of it."

While they had been strolling along Harry and Draco had taken a shortcut and were already in the head boy and girl common room. They were discussing Hermione's determination and were coming up with some more excuses to set them off the path. Some of them were quite ridiculous and Ron and Hermione heard their laughter as they stood outside the portrait hole about to enter the common room.

"Ron, isn't that Malfoy's voice?"

"Yeah. Why is he laughing with Harry?"

"That's not the issue at hand."

"Then let's separate the issue of Harry from the issue that you're a monkey's arse!"

Even Ginny in Gryffindor common room on the other side of the school heard Hermione's exclamation of outrage.

When Harry and Draco stuck their heads out of the portrait hole they found Hermione smirking evilly with her wand out while Ron ran around 1. being attacked by budgies 2. with his clothes ripped and it was perfectly clear that he had a wedgie because he was moving very much like a penguin does.

"What did he say this time?" Harry and Draco asked exactly at the same time in exactly the same bored kind of voice.

"He said I was a monkey's arse!"

"Believe me Mione, he's said worse and he never means it. You know Ron…his mouth is not even remotely connected to his brain…what there is of it…so nothing he says matters anyway!"

"Hey! I resent that!" Ron shouted as he made another circuit towards them.

"Granger, you are stealing my job. Where in your job description as Weasley's friend does it permit you to treat him that badly? Even I wouldn't stoop that low."

"Mione, as head boy I am ordering you to remove all of the spells you put on poor Ron."

"Where do you get off ordering me? I'm head girl!"

"Well everyone knows that the head boy is a higher rank than head girl."

Draco hung his head in despair and was not in the least surprised when he heard the slap coming from next to him.

"Hits hard doesn't she?"

"Ow! Come on Draco I'll take you back to your common room."

Ron was not the only boy walking like a penguin…two more were as they walked away from a very pissed off head girl.