Flee to Destiny
By: Bethany
Originally Released: 3/2002
Revised: 7/2015
Chapter Six - Dreamscape
Hazy white thick fog surrounded me. It was the same vision, or dream, I had before. Everything seemed to be slowed down, every noise louder. Each breath I drew echoed around me, magnified thousands of times to fill my mind completely. I moved, my arm seemingly viewed in each stage of air it passed.
I waited, but the girl never appeared before me. I moved around, but it seemed I hadn't moved at all. Then, like before, the mist gave way to a white light. Dim at first, it grew larger. But still I didn't see Princess Serenity from my previous visions. Instead I found myself watching what appeared to be a scene from someone's life; a large throne room rose up before me. Queen Serenity, my mother, sat on a throne looking deep and troubled.
"Mother?" a girl called, her long flowing white dress moved in the air behind her slim figure. She rushed into the large room. She stopped short of a throne, one hand on her heart while she attempted to catch her breath. "What is it that you wanted to see me about so urgently? Is everything alright?"
"Serenity," Queen Serenity said calmly as she stood. "It has come to my attention that you have been sneaking off to Earth again."
Princess Serenity's eyes widen slightly before she caught herself. "I-I don't know what you are talking about," she said, her eyes betraying her lie as they skipped around the room. "Has my guardians came to you with tales as such?" Her nervous demur disappeared as she tried to find out who had been spying on her.
"They have not," Queen Serenity snapped, stepping down from her throne and before her daughter. "Serenity, what have I told you about Earth? They are hostile at this time, threatening to attack us. I know you believe yourself in love with the young Earth Prince, but I wish you would chose among your suitors. Someone like yourself."
It seemed I was a part of their world, but they had no knowledge of my existence. I moved around the two talking, however, they didn't notice me. Slowly I approached the Queen and her daughter - myself in my past life. From where I stood beside her, I could see the tears filling her blue eyes.
"What do you know?" she cried, those crystal tears falling down her face despite her attempt to wipe them away. "I do love Endymion, with all my heart. And I care not the danger seeing him imposes, he would never let any harm come to me!"
"And how do you know that, Serenity? You're young and lust makes you see no lies. He is the Prince of those who plan to cause war; those who seek to destroy our world and take the Silver Crystal. Do you think he would abandon them when they fight us? I think not," she concluded, not allowing Serenity to get a word in edgewise.
Princess Serenity stomped her foot in frustration and fled from the room. I followed her, running as fast as she. It wasn't long before she stopped, looked around cautiously, and we entered a room that held a tall chamber made of steel. She stepped into the room and shut the door. The room around us disappeared, only to be replaced a second later with a garden of lush green.
The stars twinkled madly above, surrounding the Moon. Serenity moved carefully through the garden and to a balcony. A tall man stood, looking out into the darkness as if he were waiting for her. He lifted her up over the small stonewall, leaving me - unknown to them - to climb over and follow.
When I reached the inside room, Serenity was standing next to the man whom had helped her in. The fire light from the small flame in the fireplace danced over the couple, sending shadows moving along the walls.
The past self of Mamoru, Prince Endymion – had his arms tightly around Serenity. She cried of the cruelties that life had presented them with while he soothed her.
Memories flooded my mind. The answers to questions I had been asking for days were being answered before my eyes. The past love that Serenity said I had forgotten. Just as Mamoru had said. So many things were coming together, but they left more questions in their place. Why was I being shown this now? And why was I being shown this way? Did Princess Serenity want me to see this or am I dreaming it? How could I find out?
Instead of dwelling on the questions, I walked toward the couple. Endymion looked as much like Mamoru as I do Princess Serenity. The way he held her, the way he breathed in her ear as he spoke reminded me so much of Mamoru that my chest hurt. I longed to be in Mamoru's arms as my past self was in Endymion's.
"What are we to do, Endymion? With the upcoming war, and soon I won't be able to hide it from my mother any more..." she sobbed against his chest.
Hide what from mother? I wondered, stepping closer. I was as curious about the answer as I was fearful.
"Shhhh," Endymion whispered, trying to reassure her. "We'll find a way. I promised you I wouldn't let anything happen to you, and I'm a man of my word. You do believe me, don't you?" he asked, lifting her face with the tip of his fingers.
Princess Serenity nodded her head and leaned against his broad chest. I found myself drawn to the couple the longer they stood, holding each other. It was like a moth drawn to a flame, I couldn't help myself. Serenity's eyes locked on my own and I felt my breath catch. She can see me. I thought frantically about what that could mean, but words refused to form.
Her small hand reached up and captured Endymion's, bringing it towards her stomach to lie there softly. I began to shake my head, back and forth, stepping backwards as I did so. This couldn't be happening. I must be dreaming! my mind screamed frantically.
But this illusion, or dream, would not end. "No," I whispered, tears forming in my eyes. "You can't do this to me! I'm not you!" I screamed this time, clutching my own mid section.
Endymion smiled, not seeing me as Serenity did. When his hand pressed through the layers of her dress, I could see how her stomach was swollen. "Serenity," he breathed. "No matter what happens, the three of us will be together... I promise.."
The words echoed in my head, over and over again, like a drum with a steady beat. "..the three of us..." I shook my head in denial, running from the haunting image I had just witnessed. Running from Serenity, and her life she had lost. And now she was trying to lay claim to mine. "No!" I screamed back at her, and then stopped short.
There was nothing behind me. Nothing in front of me. The empty space I had begun in was back, the Earth gardens disappearing into nothingness. Sobs clutched at my throat, blocking my air passage. Tears ran down my face as I gasped and bent over in pain. "NO!" I screamed.
Serenity appeared in front of me, not taking her time and making an entrance as usual. She stepped closer to me, but I pulled away. Afraid of her, that her touch would somehow harm me. My glare was full of hate as I faced her. "You..." I wheezed, trying to clear my voice. "What are you doing to me? Am I... Am I going to have his baby?" The words came crystal clear, but my mind screamed denial as my body knew the truth.
Serenity no longer seemed to stand proud. She didn't meet my eyes, but from where I stood I could see the pain and tears in hers. "I thought you would be happy," she began, twisting her hands in front of her. "Endymion and I knew it was wrong, but we couldn't help but be happy about our baby." She looked desperate when she approached me this time. "We had this all planned out. We were going to tell his parents first, and then my mother. And they would see how much we loved each other, and let us be wed. It would have worked out!" She appeared to be trying to convince herself, as well as me. "One of the guards over heard us and told the people of Earth that the baby would have eternal life and take over the Earth kingdom. They said I put a spell over Endymion, seducing him for my own motives. That news began the war my mother had been fighting off for years."
"You're crazy," I accused in a near whisper. "Do you think that it would have all turned out like you said? This was no fairy tale, Serenity," I spat, the words harsher than I intended. "Good doesn't always win! Hell, we're proof of that! Happily ever after hardly happens!"
"But you are wrong!" Serenity insisted, down on her knees in front of me. Her tears flowed freely down her face. "When-when Endymion died, I made a wish. I wanted to be with him, with everyone - and I wanted everyone to survive. My mother-our mother," she emphasized, "used the Silver Crystal to send everyone to the future." Our eyes met, and I knew without a doubt what she would say next. "Everyone; including mine and Endymion's unborn child."
My tear filled eyes danced around the empty space, looking anywhere but at Serenity. Silence filled the void between us. It was done. She had set out to become me, and had succeeded. I was carrying Endymion's baby, because of her. I sat down hard on the ground in front of her, all the events I had just seen flashing before me.
Serenity looked at her clasped hands for what seemed an eternity. When finally she looked up, I felt a pang of pity in my heart for this girl. In her life, as well as my own, I had learned what she realized too late. The life of a Princess isn't all that grand and dazzling. In fact, there was hardly anything grand at all. The situation I'm in is done, I thought. Perhaps I should think less of myself and more about someone else.
"It was a few months after my seventeenth birthday when I found out. It wasn't something either Endymion or I had planned - it just happened. There was not a thought about getting rid of it, even if I could have passed myself off as a peasant girl to a healer. Endymion was so supportive, just as I'm sure Mamoru will be."
I didn't have time for the meaning of her words to settle in my mind before I found myself being pulled abruptly from there. I awoke in my bed, small drops of sweat falling down my face and neck. I sat up, my breath coming in quick gasps and my eyes so wide that they hurt. I looked around, disoriented, at my bedroom, until memories cleared away the haziness. The sun was barely peeking over the edge of the mountains, blinding me as I gazed into it. Everything I saw took on an unreal quality. I couldn't believe that my dream was reality. I just couldn't. Not yet.
Pushing the covers back, I stood up and went to the dresser. I didn't even brush my hair before I left; I just quietly slipped out the door and into the lit hallway beyond. I could see the sun rising ever higher in the sky as I rushed down the streets of Tokyo. The chilly morning air blew against my face and arms, but somehow I couldn't feel it. And it wouldn't stop me.
I debated on waiting for a bus, but decided I needed the walk. There was very little traffic this early in the morning, but the few people that were out looked to be in a hurry to get some place. I blended into the crowds until I came upon the large apartment complex where the Senshi of Mercury lived.
Biting numbly on my bottom lip, I knocked on her door. It was quite a few minutes before she came to the door, and I almost gave up. It was stupid to be here this early in the morning, I knew. But I also had to know if my dream had any face value. I lifted my fist to knock again when the door creaked open slowly.
"Usagi-chan?" Ami asked, surprised, as she opened the door further and motioned me inside. "Is there anything wrong? A youma attack?"
I just stared at her a moment, feeling stupid for disturbing her so early in the morning. And speechless to ask what was sitting on my mind. Ami smiled softly, putting her small hand on my shoulder. "Usagi-chan, what is it? You can tell me."
I ran my tongue over my parched lips. My eyes were so dry they felt hollow. I knew I didn't have any tears left in my body, so instead my eyes seemed to widen with pain. Ami guided me to the living room, sitting me down in a chair. I knew what I had come to ask. It was finding the words to begin that were so hard.
Finally, I decided to just say it and get it over with. "Ami-chan, I need you to test me for something..." Just say it! my mind screamed, but my lips refused to listen.
Ami crossed her legs, studying me closely. "For what?" she nearly whispered.
"I think... well, I think I may be pregnant." The words surprised me as well as her, though I had been thinking it since I woke up. Hearing them aloud, and out of my mouth, was a different thing completely. What in the world would I do with a baby? The darkness of doom and uncertainty pulled at my mind.
"Pregnant?" Ami finally repeated, searching my gaze. "Usagi-chan, didn't you just tell us that Shingo wasn't yours and you were a vir-" as she fumbled over words, she reached for her glasses and placed them on her face carefully.
"Please don't ask any questions, yet, Ami. Just do it." This conversation isn't happening, surely. I'm not demanding anything from one of my guardians. And to be asking this, of all things. Pregnant? I was a virgin for crying out loud! Impossible, right? That is what I was here to find out.
Ami reached for her computer, snapping it open. Instantly it replied to her commands; a small red light flashing was barely visible from where I sat. Small fingers, topped with pastel blue nail polish, typed along the keys skillfully for what seemed an eternity. Ami wore the serious mask of a future doctor when she pushed her glasses up to sit in her hair and closed her computer. What I hoped she would say was the opposite of what my heart told me.
"As far as I can see, Usagi-chan, though I can't explain it.." Those words made my heart jump from my chest to my throat in an instant. "..you are somewhere around nine weeks pregnant." She stood up, coming to sit in the floor in front of me. She looked as puzzled as I was devastated. "It's what I picked up on my scan previously, but I didn't think it was possible, so I didn't ask the computer if it was a life…"
So it was true. Not a dream. Not my imagination playing tricks on me. Reality. Hard, scientifically impossible, reality. I once more felt my mind pulling from that well of tears, but I had none. So I sat, staring into space at my own thoughts and fears. Pregnant. Not only that, but I was a virgin. And how would I tell Mamoru that it's his?
"Usagi-chan, you don't look so surprised," Ami accused, staring oddly at me. "Who's is it?"
"Mamo-chan," I answered dumbly, still not looking at her. I felt like I was going to be sick again.
If Ami was surprised, she didn't show it. Of course, I had only been in Tokyo for five weeks, and had known Mamoru less than that. Instead of dwelling on how this happened, I was thankful when she began asking other questions.
It was sometime later when Ami finished poking and prodding at me, and when I finally finished telling her about Serenity and what I saw in my vision last night. For such a scientific person, she was open to unexplainable things. Perhaps you learn not to question reincarnation when you're living proof of it.
What did set my mind at ease was that it was no abnormal event for me to be so tired all the time, or to go around fainting. And that didn't bother me as much as the statement; "You'll be sick for another couple of weeks." Ugh, that sounded like a ton of fun, let me tell you.
Was life not hard enough right now? My parents still fresh in their graves, finding out that just about my whole life had been a series of events that lead me up to... what? Standing here, across the world from where I wanted to be - pregnant with what would be the biggest news on Earth if it were found out. I am a Princess who is supposed to be defeating an enemy that wants to destroy Earth - yeah, right.
"Oh, could you please keep the noise level on your attacks down? You'll wake the baby." I could see it now.
On a more serious note, though. What if I hurt the baby while fighting? I may not have wanted this baby, but let's face it - it isn't going anywhere. And I definitely don't want him or her hurt while I fight. And what about my job? And school? Too many questions and too few answers haunted my mind all the way home.
When I arrived I was surprised to find Haruka's car sitting in front of the apartment complex. Michiru sat in the passenger seat, and motioned to me as I passed. Both stepped from the car, following me inside the building. When at last I was out of the chilly wind, I turned and smiled as brightly as my worn out features would allow. "Konnichi'wa, Michiru-san, Haruka-san."
"Morning neko-chan*," Haruka replied, winking. She stopped short in what she was going to say, suddenly studying my face. "Usagi, you've been crying," she stated, pulling out a handkerchief and handing it to me. "Tears do not suit you at all. What's wrong?"
Michiru stood beside her, smiling softly at me. I'm sure that it would have done a load of good to get everything off my chest, but now was not the time. And these were not the people. Ami was a great friend, but she seemed to want to focus on how the baby would change my health physically rather than emotionally. And emotionally, I felt drained enough to sleep for a week. "I eh," I begun, fumbling for an excuse for the horrible way I'm sure I looked. "It's nothing."
Michiru placed her arm around my shoulders, squeezing lightly. "It's okay if you want to talk about it. We'll listen. Is it about your parents?"
With the window of opportunity wide open, I jumped on the chance Michiru had just unknowingly given me. "Hai," I answered quickly. "But I'll be okay." I sniffed back my tears, trying to not think of the dull aching beginning in my head. I wondered, then, what they would think of me if they knew I was pregnant. Seventeen, unmarried, new to the town, and carrying the baby of a man I had known less than how far along I was. I felt like I should somehow be ashamed. And for the first time since my parent's death I was actually glad they weren't here to see me - what a disappointment I would be. "I was just going to go and get Shingo ready for school, so I need to be going."
"Oh, gomen," Haruka said, smiling. "Don't let us hold you up. Actually, we just came over here to see if you wanted us to pick Shingo up for school. Hotaru goes to the same school, so it wouldn't be out of the way."
"Hotaru has been going on for days about how cute Shingo is, perhaps they could be friends," Michiru added. She stood so meek and withdrawn standing next to Haruka. She reminded me of someone who sat back and studied a situation before actually placing herself in it. I wish I had that luxury.
Two things came to mind - how I wanted to be the one to take Shingo to school; and how much easier it would be to not have to rush like crazy to get to my classes every morning. In the end, I thought better that Shingo make some friends - so I let go of my selfishness. "I would love that, Haruka-san. And I'm sure Shingo would too. What time do you want him ready?"
Haruka looked at her wristwatch, but for some reason I had the feeling she already knew what time it was. "Well, in the next ten minutes or so."
I was dumbfounded. Had I actually spent that much time over at Ami's? I was going to be late, Shingo was going to be late - and I'm sure that both Shingo and Makoto are wondering where in the world I was.
My face must have registered some shock, because Michiru laughed softly. "Didn't you know what time it was?"
"Eh, actually, I guess I lost track," I answered, stumbling over my words as I pointed to the elevator. "Come on up and I'll get him ready."
The two women (I was still having a hard time coming to grips with remembering that Haruka is female.) followed me up to Makoto's apartment. They sat patiently in the living room while I rushed towards the bedroom looking for Mako-chan and Shingo. I found them laughing in the bathroom, Makoto spiking Shingo's hair. I pushed the door open further. "As strikingly handsome as you are like that, you need to brush it down. Haruka-san and Michiru-san are going to take you to school and they are waiting."
Shingo rushed passed me, saying something about finding his school bag and Makoto put her hand on her hip. "Where have you been?" I thought she would be mad at me, but instead she appeared to have been more worried.
I twisted a piece of my hair between my fingers nervously and turned to go out of the room. "I'll explain after school, when everyone gets here."
Makoto looked somewhat puzzled, but followed me out of the room. As I went through the motions of getting Shingo out the door to school, I worried about how I would tell them I was pregnant - and worried more about their reactions.
I looked at the package set before me. Ami nodded her head, pushing them closer to me, even as I shrank away. "Demo..." I mumbled. "They taste like... like... cardboard!"
"I won't ask how you know what cardboard tastes like," Rei pointed out, looking slightly amused at my reaction. Relief came over me; since we had been sitting here it was the first time Rei had showed any emotion whatsoever.
Minako leaned forward, her elbows supporting her weight as she did so. "Don't worry about school, just get everything you can get done while you still can and then enroll in night school or something."
A wan smiled tugged on my lips. I had been so scared to come here this afternoon, and tell them what had happened last night and Ami's findings this morning. But oddly enough, everyone was being so supportive. I felt myself relax some, until Ami pushed the package of saltine crackers even closer to me. "Can't I eat Ritz or something like that?"
Ami shook her head, smiling at me with sympathy. "Saltines help calm your stomach by absorbing some of the acids that cause you to become nauseated. It's probably the one food you'll be able to keep down until you are out of your first trimester. Of course, you'll need to get on prenatal vitamins so that you don't become anemic or anything, that would be bad for the baby," she advised, still eyeing me and my reluctance towards the crackers.
I stared at that hateful package, looking so innocent on the table. Finally, with the urging of Ami, I took it and placed it next to me on the floor. "I, eh, don't feel sick now. But I'll eat them later." Everyone looked at me doubtfully. "When I'm hungry," I supplied, trying to smile.
The room fell quiet for a moment, the peacefulness of the temple allowing only the songs of birds to be heard. I knew what the next question on everyone's mind, it was just seeing who would be the one to say it. It turned out to be Makoto.
"Eh, Usagi-chan, when are you going to tell Mamoru-san?"
An even hush went around the room, every one of my guardians leaning forward while they waited for my answer. It was then that my well of tears had restored itself, and I felt tears begin to fill my eyes. "I don't know how to tell him. I know he won't believe me. Would you all have believed me if Ami hadn't said it true?"
Each of the Senshi looked at me, the truth in their eyes. Who would have believed it, without proof? Even I had denied it until I couldn't be any longer. Rei, who was sitting beside me, placed her hand on my shoulder. "Just tell him everything you've told us. You know, Mamoru-san has regained more of his memories than any of us. He may already remember all of this."
"And if he doesn't, he might think that I'm just a little slut that wants to make him the father of a mistake I made in the States!" I replied back, harsher than I meant to. Everyone except Rei seemed to recoil from my outburst.
Instead of looking at me in sympathy like the others, her eyes glowed with anger. "So what do you plan to do, Usagi? Not tell him, try to raise a baby on your own? Even with our help, you need Mamoru's emotional support and I don't need to be as smart as Ami to know it! I see the way you two look at each other, like there is no one else in the world. Are you going to sit there and tell me that you can cut that off, and not be heartbroken? Would you do that to yourself, as well as Mamoru?" Her posture, her tone, reminded me of the Fire Princess I had known on the Moon. Behind it all, she was always my best friend. And I knew that even though she was angry, my best interest was in her heart. When I said nothing, she continued; "Usagi, we aren't on the Moon anymore. You and Mamoru are on the same planet-the same city. There's nothing to keep you apart like there used to be."
"I don't know how to tell him..." I said, but as the words left my mouth I realized I was whining. And I knew that whining and crying didn't change anything. This was going to be hard, but nothing in my life would be easy again. I had to face that, learn to live with it. And this was relatively small compared to what I might face in the future.
Minako laid her head down on her folded arms, looking straight at me. "Just tell him what you told us, Usagi-chan. I know it will be hard, but we are here for you. The worst he can do is not believe you."
"And then the worst I can do is aim a fire charm at him," Rei said, smiling at me.
I cracked a smile at that, shaking my head. I stood up and grabbed my backpack. "I have to be heading to work now. Mamo-chan is going to bring Shingo to the arcade, so he will be with me tonight."
"You know I don't mind babysitting," Makoto pointed out, her finger stuck out to indicate my stomach. "All of us will be happy to help out with Shingo or this new addition."
"Thank you," I grinned, patting my stomach. "I may have to take you up on that offer. But while I can still care fully for Shingo, I want to make the best of it I can. I'm afraid it won't be too long until I won't feel like playing with him until after the baby is born."
Everyone nodded their understanding and bid me goodbye. I walked down the temple steps rather slowly, thoughts clouding my mind. Telling Mamo-chan was a lot harder than it sounded, my hands actually shook I was so scared of the concept. But like Minako said, the worst he can do is not believe me. I have to think positively about the situation I'm in, since there is no way out of it.
I walked into the arcade and fruit parlor and headed straight for the bathroom to change clothes. Leaving my bag in my locker, I clocked in and headed for Motoki.
"Hey Usagi-chan!" he greeted, smiling as always. "You have tables one thru ten tonight. It's a Monday night and we are usually pretty slow, so do you want to go home early if it gets too slow? Or do you want me to let Naru go and you stay?"
"I'll stay," I replied immediately, knowing I needed the money no matter how bad I wanted to go home early.
"Great," Motoki reached in his pocket and produced a nametag. My name was typed out, beside it a small picture of a bunny. "You left this here yesterday so I added something, if you don't like it you can peel it off."
"Oh no, it's cute!" I assured him. "Well, I better get to work."
Motoki was right, the store was extremely slow. A few teenagers hung out in the arcade room, but my only customers were an elderly couple and a younger woman with long emerald hair. She sat alone near the windows over looking the streets and sipped green tea. With no work to do, I found myself wiping clean counter tops over and over again and sighing often. At least I'm getting paid to stand here and do practically nothing, I thought.
Putting my rag down, I picked up the pot of tea and started towards the woman again when I felt a small pang in my stomach. The lady looked up, as if she somehow knew what I felt and our eyes meet. Her magenta colored eyes were intense, studying me like she could sense what I was thinking. The now familiar sweet taste fled up my throat, drowning my mouth and I practically dropped the pot of tea in my hurry to the restroom.
After my close encounter with the toilet - one I was beginning to hate - I filled my hands with cool water and splashed it on my face. My cheeks were flushed and I felt feverish. Closing my eyes, I waited for my beating heart to calm down so that I could return to work. My eyes snapped open when the restroom door opened and the woman with the long green haired came through it. "Feeling better?" she asked, her long arms crossed in front of her casually.
She leaned against the doorframe, preventing me from exiting without asking her to move. For some reason, I had the feeling of being trapped. I took a step back, wary of her motives. "Eh, hai. I'm okay."
She nodded her head, her eyes locked on mine again. She seemed to be searching my soul, looking for something, perhaps. When finally I could break the contact, I felt strange, almost light headed. "I need to return to work now," I said, placing my paper towel in the trash and taking a step towards her.
Her eyes darted to my nametag, and a small smile tugged on her lips. "Usagi, that is your name?" I nodded. "What is your last name? If I may ask."
Well you already have asked, I thought. What the use in asking if you can now? Biting my bottom lip, I meet her gaze again. "Tsukino. Tsukino Usagi."
"Moon Bunny?" she said in perfect English, not a hint of her Japanese accent coming through. "That's an odd translation, ne?"
"Gomen ne, but I have some customers I need to attend to..." I said, making an excuse as I reached for the door handle.
Her hand grabbed mine and I looked up in fear. When our eyes meet, I tried to hide my anxiety from her and made my gaze steady. Instead of the intense stare she had meet me with moments before, her eyes appeared softer now - almost lovingly. "How far along are you, Princess?"
So much for my control over my emotions. Shock made me stutter as I stepped back from her. "N..Nani? How did you know?" And then, her intense stare, the way she seemed to search my soul. It was like a light bulb turned on in my head - and then suddenly shattered into a million pieces. "Who are you?" I asked, trying to sound as much and in control and demanding as I once did on the Moon. Pride for who I was - Princess Serenity and Sailor Moon - made my spine turn to steel and my eyes bore harder into the woman in front of me.
"Ah, so there is the Princess I was searching for," she said, looking slightly amused. "I was wondering when you would come out of hiding. You never did tolerate ignorance to any situation. I also see your memory has not returned in full yet, or you wouldn't be asking who I was."
She looked so familiar, but I couldn't pin it. Confused, I hoped she was a friend - and not an enemy. "Can we take this to your table?" I asked, holding my hand on the counter. "I feel slightly light headed." And if you are an enemy, Mamo-chan will be here any minute with Shingo and kill you for touching me.
"Of course," she smiled, moving out of the way and holding the door open for me. We went to her table, sitting across from each other. I waited for her to sip her tea before talking. "My name is Setsuna, but before you try, you won't remember me by that name. I have known you in both your life times, from the moment you were born on the Moon until this very second. I know how you used to sneak off to Earth to be with Endymion, I know that you were pregnant - and that the last wish you made on the Moon was for everyone, including your baby, to be restored in this life. And your mother, granting that wish, had no idea you were with child." She stopped, sipping from her cup again and looking at me over the rim of her glass. "You never answered my question earlier."
"Which was that?" I asked, amazed at this woman's knowledge of things I had only just discovered - but determined not to let her know that. My stomach felt weak again, and with about as much enthusiasm as a man walking the plank, I pulled a saltine cracker from my pocket and began nibbling on it.
"How far along are you?"
The bits of salt flavored sandpaper moved around in my mouth as I chewed, touching my tongue and making me want to gag. I'm sure Ami doesn't know what she is talking about on this one, saltines are more likely to make me vomit than the baby. "About nine weeks," I answered, putting the rest of the cracker down and reaching for the glass of water I had brought to the table with me. The cool liquid rushed down my throat, taking the soggy pieces of cardboard with it as I swallowed. "Excuse me for a moment." Quickly I stood up and went to the only other occupied table in the room. The elderly couple said they didn't need anything else, gave me a handsome tip, and left.
When I returned to the table, Setsuna laughed softly, like I had never gotten up. "Not crazy about saltines, ne? Can't say I blame you." Her casual conversation seemed forced, an intentional change of subject.
I put the glass of water back on the table and looked her straight in the eyes. The smiled dropped off her face, replaced by a serious look that made me wish for her cheerfulness back. I leaned forward, still looking her in the eyes. "Who are you? Why don't I remember you when it is obvious you know both my life histories?"
"I am-"
"Setsuna, what are you doing here?" Mamoru asked, coming up to the table, Shingo in his arms. He put my brother down, eyeing the woman in front of me strangely.
Setsuna looked shocked, in a way, at his words. But I had the feeling that her shocked exterior was only a facade. She seemed to have already known what he was going to say before he showed up. "Mamoru-san," she greeted, now back to her cool calmness she had shown me. "How nice to see you here."
Mamo-chan handed Shingo some tokens, instructing him to go downstairs. He stood for a moment, uneasily, and sat down next to me. Setsuna watched him, a blank stare on her face, then looked at me a little guiltily. I smiled when Mamo-chan placed his arm around me, and snuggled into his embrace. But the second his hand slightly came in contact with my stomach I remembered about the conversation Setsuna and I were having before Mamo-chan came in. I prayed she didn't say anything to him. Trying to clear away the fears clouding my mind, I smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "I didn't know you two knew each other."
"Hmmm," Setsuna said quietly, sipping her tea again.
"Usako," Mamo-chan began, facing me. "What time do you get off work? I was hoping I could take the love of my life out to dinner tonight."
"Mamo-chan," I replied, taking no notice of Setsuna's attention on us. "You know I have school tomorrow and some homework to catch up-" I stopped, knowing that he would talk me into it anyways. This was my chance, to be alone with him. To try to explain how it was I was having his baby.
"Nani?" he urged, still waiting for me to complete the sentence I left off in the middle of.
"I think that is a wonderful idea, but I don't want to go out. Can't we order in? I get off work in thirty minutes, and Makoto said she would watch Shingo if I needed her to tonight."
My enthusiasm and my change in attitude confused Mamo-chan. For a moment at least - he looked a little like questioning it. "Okay, we can order in, if you want."
I left him and Setsuna sitting at the table, wondering if I should or not. It had nothing to do with trusting Mamo-chan, but I had the feeling that Setsuna and Mamo-chan weren't just old friends. There seemed to be something a little more business like under the surface. Shrugging it off, I picked up the phone and called Makoto to see if she would baby-sit Shingo for me.
I stepped out of the shower, picking the towel up off the counter. In the full length mirror across from me, I stopped to stare at my reflection. I hadn't paid much attention to it before today, but I felt different somehow.
I placed my hand on my flat stomach and tried to picture myself pregnant. The idea of my body swelling up didn't appeal to me. "Can I love this child that I didn't want?" I asked my reflection, putting both hands on my stomach. "Will Mamo-chan want it? Want me, my little brother and a baby?" I just stared into my own blue eyes, and thought about Mamoru's. The bottomless well of feelings for me that I saw there every time our eyes meet.
"Usagi-chan, Mamoru-san is here to pick you up!" Makoto shouted through the door, knocking slightly on it.
"Hai!" I replied, putting the towel around me and cracking the door open. "Tell him to give me a minute. Well," I said to myself, once the door was closed. "There's no time like the present."
-End Chapter 6.
Okay, the answer to one of everyone's questions - yes, she is pregnant. But what I want to know is what you all think of the way I presented it, because I love this idea ^_^
I do not own Sailor Moon. I know this is getting repetitive, but I don't want that one chapter to be the one where someone decides to sue me lol!
I'm already working on editing the next chapter, I should have it out in the next hour or so. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Thank you for the reviews, messages, and such. Thank you for reading.
God bless.
Beth