Chapter 3 – A Distance Forming

"You're not to come into the dormitory again." He punched Sirius in the stomach and Sirius doubled over in pain and James punched him again in the face. James, wand still in hand, turned to go up the stairs to the dormitory but with his foot on the bottom step, he turned back. "And you're to tell Remus what you did in the morning; he deserves to hear it straight from the traitor's mouth." He raised his wand and shot a cutting hex towards the corner before climbing the stairs.

~#~

Sirius awoke sluggishly the following morning. He had a pounding in his head that the boy quickly recognised as a particularly nasty hangover and a rough feeling on his tongue that practically screamed for water.

Rolling from the bed and staggering to his feet, Sirius suddenly got a look at his surroundings (albeit through half-closed eyelids). Though he had not been specific in his request from the room the previous night, the room seemed to recognise him and had furnished its insides with Gryffindor colours and crests. There was a low fire burning in the grate opposite, which sent comforting warmth through the room that was reminiscent of the Gryffindor common room.

However, the room was not his dormitory and he could not hear his dorm mates frantically preparing for the day ahead. Sirius sunk back onto the bed as remembrance struck him. The fifth year no longer felt the warmth of the fire; in fact he no longer felt any warmth at all. He felt as cold as if a Dementor had just entered the room, every previously happy, contented thought was wrenched from his mind as he remembered just what he had done.

How could he betray his closest friends so easily? They were all he really had left in the world as his family was close to giving up hope on him and he and his brother were no longer close. Sirius had never felt as close to anyone as he did his friends, he would have done anything for them if only they asked.

And yet, Moony did ask. The only thing he ever asked was that the three of them never tell another soul. And that was the one promise he had broken.

The sudden thought of Padfoot surged through his mind when he thought of his most betrayed friend. Padfoot, the dog: symbolic of loyalty and faith. How could he become such an animal when he so readily betrayed his friends? There was no way he could have the qualities of a dog when that was how he really acted. He was not the loyal hound nor the defender of his friends and he certainly wasn't a brave Gryffindor when he caved to Snape's wishes so easily.

Once again Sirius' thoughts strayed to Remus. He was probably in a right sorry mess in the Hospital Wing just like he used to be after a full moon, before they all became animagi for him. He would be undeniably confused at what caused his new injuries and why he had had such a horrible night. And he would quickly realise that the root of his problems was the absence of his friends the previous night.

With the image of a beaten and broken best friend in his mind, Sirius cast a quick time charm to find out how long he had until he had to see Dumbledore. He had just forty minutes to clean himself up, still bloody from James' wrath a few hours earlier, and try to explain to Remus what on earth he had been thinking.

Quickly showering in a side-room he hadn't previously noticed and grabbing the necessary books for the day from a shelf he could've sworn hadn't been there when he'd awoken, Sirius ran from the room.

He hurtled along the left corridor before skidding around the corner onto the Grand Staircase. He stumbled down two flights of stairs before stopping to an aggravating halt at the third staircase. After waiting two painstaking minutes, the stairs had realigned giving Sirius access to the fourth floor. He pulled open the heavy door leading to the fourth floor corridor and sprinted along it before tearing open the portrait revealing the Hospital Tower staircase. He practically jumped down all three sets of stairs and ran along the corridor before slamming to a halt at the threshold to the Hospital Wing.

All this time and Sirius hadn't thought to think what he was going to tell Remus.

~#~

Peering in from the doorway, Sirius saw that the room beyond was empty. Empty, barring the figure he knew to occupy the bed at the end of the Wing and the healer he believed to be in her bed in the office.

Stepping cautiously into the large, sterile white room, Sirius approached the bed at the end.

He'd only taken a handful of quiet steps before a hoarse but friendly voice called: 'Padfoot!'

The boy recoiled inwardly at the use of his nickname. It brought him back to his previous musings regarding his own failings.

Unfortunately, his scarred friend caught the aghast and stricken look that flitted across Sirius' face.

'What's the matter? What happened? I assume you lot got caught with some prank last night so you couldn't make it? I've not felt this bad for a little while now.' Remus however, smiled at his friend warmly, not blaming any of his three friends for an instant.

Sirius finally reached the bed, though he stopped short of its foot whereas he'd usually stand beside his friend.

'Remus…' the name clawed its way out of Sirius' throat before he'd had a chance to stop it. The pained sound instantly drew Remus' attention and he quickly lost his smile.

'What is it Padfoot?'

'I'm sorry Remus. I'm so sorry.' Remus looked confusedly on, taking in the hunched and defeated look in his friend's stature that was so alien to the boy.

'I never meant- I didn't mean- I swear to you I didn't mean to betray you.'

Remus' heart felt as though it dropped through his stomach and clattered on the floor. 'What did you do?' His tone was low and solemn, leaving no room for any argument or deviation in conversation.

'I- I told Sniv- Snape how to find you.' The dark haired boy stuttered before clenching his eyes shut.

'You did what?' Remus' low voice was positively venomous. 'Please tell me he had more sense than to follow your thick-headed directions? Please tell me he's not dead?'

Sirius could only shake his head.

'Oh Merlin, I didn't bite him did I?' Remus looked in equal parts appalled, angry and devastated.

'No. No, he's fine and he won't say anything either. James and Dumbledore saw to that. I'm sorry Remus, I honestly didn't mean to.'

'Get out. I don't want to see you or hear your ridiculous apologies again.' Remus looked as though he expected, nay hoped for, some form of argument from Sirius, as he'd usually get when annoyed with him or telling him to do something. Instead, Sirius hung his head still lower and nodded to the floor before shuffling away to the exit.

While Remus had expected more of an objection from his friend, he was immensely angry with him. He had trusted his three friends more than anything, against his better judgement. But he had trusted them with his greatest secret and yet Sirius had thrown that away over a petty feud. Remus didn't think his former friend quite understood the consequences of his lunar condition, didn't understand what it meant if the world knew.

Remus watched his retreating back and noticed as a new shadow appeared in the doorway. He watched as the new shadow forcefully collided with the stooped figure hard enough to send him clattering into a nearby bed. Yet no words were exchanged and the broader, longer-haired boy collected himself before continuing his journey out of the room.

The shadow moved, accompanied now by another figure, towards Remus' bed. With the anger at Sirius' betrayal still coursing through his veins and the lasting aches and pains from his transformation, Remus was unsure if he was ready to face his other 'friends' and hear of how they too betrayed him.

However, the two figures approached the bed as they usually did at this time of the month. With one stood on either side, Remus had no escape from the words he thought inevitable.

'How are you Remus? Do you hurt a lot again? Are there any breaks?' James spoke softly and Remus looked up at the concerned tone exhibited by the dark-haired boy.

James caught the understanding behind his furrowed brow. 'You surely don't think we had anything to do with what that git do to you? You know we'd never betray you or even intentionally hurt you.'

'I once thought that Sirius wouldn't do that either.' Remus spoke quietly, staring at his knees.

'Well the git showed himself to be more faithful to the family he claimed to detest than to the friends he claimed were better than his blood. Just showed himself to be a true Black after all, even after he spent so long convincing us all otherwise.' James spat.

'Don't say that James, even after all he's done. He's not that bad, not really. Is he?'

'Maybe not yet.' Peter spoke quietly, reminding the other two of his presence.

At that point the resident healer came bustling into the room. 'Right you three…' She trailed off, only just noticing the absence of the fourth Marauder. 'Two, you should go get some breakfast otherwise you won't have time before lessons start, you can come back at lunch. Remus isn't well enough to be joining you this morning.' She turned to Remus and continued talking, though with a much kinder and gentler tone. 'You were getting so much better after your transformations recently dear, and now you've suddenly regressed again. I can't imagine what caused it.'

A low growl uttered from James' lips so reminiscent of their former friend that they all stopped short.

'Off you go you two.' The matron said sternly.

Peter turned to the pale boy in the bed, 'we'll be back later Moony, try and get some sleep.'

'Yeah, see you later Moony.' James echoed.

Remus watched the retreating back of his two remaining friends with a heavy heart, starting to rethink his previous decision to trust his friends.

Madam Pomfrey moved in for her second round of healing as the dark oak doors quietly shut at the other end of the room.

~#~

Sirius had to sprint in order to reach Dumbledore's office before eight o'clock.

When he reached the stone gargoyle on the seventh floor it had already moved aside revealing the passageway and staircase beyond.

Trying to catch his breath as he stood on the stairs as they wound him up to the Headmaster's office, Sirius straightened his tie and tucked in his shirt, thinking it best to attempt a good impression.

He rapped on the door three times and listened to the sound echo beyond the heavy wooden doors.

'Come in.' A muffled but distinctive voice called.

Taking a last deep breath, Sirius pushed open the door prepared to swallow his fate. Though he expected to see a small crowd in the office, the fifth year was pleased to note that the only inhabitant was the headmaster.

Moving to stand in front of the dark wood desk, Sirius looked up into the eyes of Professor Dumbledore. He cringed inwardly at the intensity of the bright blue eyes that could always make him feel uncomfortable.

'Morning Sir.' He muttered in greeting.

'Ah Mr Black, right on time I see. I wanted you to meet me here in the mornings so that I could ensure you would make all your lessons on time and were in the right frame of mind for the day. As I have now done that, I will let you get to breakfast before heading to Charms I believe. You are to meet with Professor McGonagall at six o'clock in her office for your detention tonight. Good day.'

Noting the brusque dismissal, Sirius turned about and left the room.

~#~

Wandering at a fairly swift pace down seven floors, Sirius began to ponder where he'd eat breakfast. He really wasn't in the mood for food but knew his stomach wouldn't forgive him in two hours if he didn't. He didn't want the attention another argument with James would cause and couldn't bear the staring that he'd already had to endure while wondering around the school if he went into the Great Hall. It appeared that news of the argument the previous night had quickly spread through the whole school.

As a result of his musings, Sirius by-passed the open doors to the Great Hall. He was assaulted by the happy talking of his classmates in the brief time he crossed the glow emitting from the room. Instead he walked down to the kitchen corridor and pushed aside the painting of the fruit bowl and placed his order with the all-too-cheerful house elves.

~#~

Sirius was among the first to charms and was therefore at the front of the queue while his friends were where he'd usually be; at the back after having an extended breakfast. Once Flitwick had arrived and let the class into the room, Sirius made straight for the front corner, knowing it would be well away from where James, Remus and Peter would sit. Thankfully, there were more than enough desks for everyone to sit at so Sirius was not joined by another student.

The lesson passed slowly as Sirius struggled to pay attention. His mind kept wandering to his current predicament and the distance formed between himself and his friends. Unfortunately, this was all too obvious for his classmates who could see the physical distance between the previously inseparable four. Every time the Charms professor's back was turned, students turned to one another to whisper about this latest gossip.

It wasn't until ten minutes before the end of the lesson when someone was brave enough to enquire directly with one of the Marauders.

Todd Eilers, a fellow Gryffindor, turned from his seat in front of the trio and said: 'Oi James, what happened between you lot and Black?' Though he whispered, the entire class could hear. Even Professor Flitwick stiffened at the front of the room and tried to listen in surreptitiously.

'He showed himself to be a right dick and a true Black and that's unforgivable.' James replied bluntly.

'But what's he done?'

'That's none of your business.'

Upon realising he'd get no more information out of the dark-haired boy, Eilers returned to face the front of the room and the rest of the lesson passed in relative peace.

~#~

The following few lessons continued in the same vain, though their last lesson proved to be a little more interesting. The Gryffindors shared this lesson with the Hufflepuffs and as there were so many Hufflepuffs, Sirius had not the room to work alone.

Eventually paired with Faye Lockhart, the chattiest girl in the school, Sirius braced himself for the endless questions that were sure to follow the minute the professor stopped talking.

Sure enough, five minutes later when they'd been set to work on removing the pods from their Vervain plants Lockhart turned and opened her mouth to start the barrage of questions. Noticing this, Sirius "accidentally" prodded the stem of the plant causing sticky black ink to be squirted all over Faye Lockhart's golden yellow hair.

She soon ran squealing from the room and the class burst out laughing.

~#~

At six o'clock that evening, Sirius could be found outside his head of house's office after eating a slow dinner in the kitchens, awaiting her arrival for his detention.

By now the news of his detachment from the group known to the school as the Marauders was known by all houses, not just his own.

As such, when a small group of Slytherins turned to walk along the First Floor Corridor and spotted Sirius stood alone, they began to taunt him.

'Oi Black, I hear you broke up with your boyfriend.' Sirius spun, wand already in hand. Four Slytherins began their approach, each with their wands raised.

'Nobody here to save you now blood traitor. Nobody to have your back.' Carrow's voice was cold and sinister.

The four began to spread out and Sirius noticed the taller boy behind them and felt his gut clench in half panic. It was Tristram Wilkes, a seventh year known for his dark curses and skill at duelling. While Sirius' own duelling ability was well known in the school, he could not hope to beat four aspiring Death Eaters when Wilkes was among them.

'Shall we teach the blood traitor a lesson, boys?'

Sirius only just got a shield up in time as a slashing hex fizzled out just before hitting his noise. Instinctively dropping into a half crouch so as to duel better, Sirius quickly shot back a Jelly-legs curse which caught Rowle square in the chest and caused him to clatter into Carrow and block the next shot.

While Sirius was distracted with Rowle, Wilkes caught him with a hammer hex which threw him hard into the stone wall behind and his skull cracked against it. Blood trickled down his neck but he was not yet unconscious, though his vision was bleary.

Just as the older boy raised his wand with a follow-up curse on his lips a shrill voice called down the hall: 'What in the name of Merlin is the meaning of this?'

The four Slytherins spun on the spot, wands lowering as they turned; Rowle stumbled and fell over due to the lingering Jelly-legs curse. Sirius did not have the energy or the concentration to move and instead slumped against the wall, feeling the back of his head as he went.

'Into my office, now!' Minerva McGonagall flicked her wand and the door beside Sirius sprung open. The Slytherins trudged in, none looking even slightly remorseful.

Raising his wand to his head, Sirius tapped the deep gash in his skull and muttered 'etiam' and five neat stiches closed the wound and stopped the blood flow. It didn't, however, make the dizziness go away.

The deputy headmistress stopped in front of him and ushered him into the room behind the Slytherins. As he turned into the room, she vanished the small splash of blood on the wall.

When she had moved to stand behind her desk, all five boys were standing facing her, though Sirius was stood further off to the side and was leaning heavily on the desk behind him.

'What happened?' Her voice was low.

'Just teaching the blood traitor a lesson Professor.' Wilkes spoke, clearly the nominated leader of the group of students.

'And four against one is acceptable for you is it?'

Wilkes had the decency and common sense not to reply.

'I will not have duelling in the corridors of this school. You four will each serve detention with me for the rest of this week starting from now, I will also be taking this to the headmaster.' She now turned to the Gryffindor stood before her. 'Mr Black, am I right in believing that you are not foolish enough to start a duel with such abysmal odds and therefore were just the victim of this attack?'

''Es Professor.' He half-slurred in reply.

'Then as you were already due to be in detention tonight I will not add to it but I will not have the five of you together in my office for a detention.' She turned back to the five students as a whole. 'I believe Professor Whitlock needs his classroom cleaning after a student got violently ill before lunch. I will send for him to collect the four of you.' She nodded towards the Slytherins. 'You will each leave your wands with me.'

The Slytherins groaned in disgust but each handed over their wands with only a little complaining.

McGonagall cast a brief message charm which sped out of the room and seconds later the fireplace glowed bright green as the Ancient Runes professor stepped out.

'Ah, some willing volunteers for cleaning I see. Thank you Professor, I will take over from here.' The wizened old professor said almost gleefully.

The four students left the room, scowling at Sirius and McGonagall as they went. When left alone, the Transfiguration teacher turned to her student with an almost kindly look on her face.

'Are you okay, Black? No lasting damage?' Instead of waiting for his reply she cast a quick diagnostic charm.

Sirius shuffled uncomfortably as he felt the charm probe him, ''m fine,' he muttered.

'Yes, it appears you are. You have healed the cut well enough. You're just left with a concussion which should be clear by tomorrow.' She motioned for Sirius to sit at the desk he was leaning against.

Once he had done so, she spoke again. 'You're lucky. I was going to have you clean the Runes classroom but given your clearly disorientated state I thought it unwise. Instead you can do lines, that shouldn't aggravate the concussion too much.'

~#~

Once the tediously slow detention was over, Sirius grabbed his bag from under the desk and set off for what he now nicknamed 'round two'.

Professor Dumbledore's office was much the same as it had been that previous morning, with the exception of there now being a desk and chair settled in the corner.

'Sit down, I assume you have homework you can be doing?' Professor Dumbledore spoke from above a large book he was perusing.

'Yes, Sir.'

'Then you can be getting on with that for now. If you are finished then let me know and I will give you something else to do.' The headmaster returned to the book on his desk as Sirius sat himself at the desk opposite.

By ten o'clock, an hour before fifth year curfew, Sirius announced that he was done with that day's homework.

Dumbledore nodded curtly without saying a word before rising out of his chair and entering the room behind. Around a minute later he returned, carrying three heavy books and a long roll of blank parchment.

Placing these on the desk in front of the fifth year he said, 'From now on, when you finish homework and studying, I want you to write me an extended essay on werewolves, covering appearance and personality both during transformation and during the rest of the month. I also want you to detail the laws regarding werewolves and what happens to them if they are caught.'

Sirius blanched only thinking about what the books in front of him might contain.

Swallowing his punishment just a nod of the head, Sirius picked up the top book from the small pile in front of him. It was titled 'Darkest Beasts and their Threats to Humanity.' The second read 'Laws and Punishments for Magical Creatures.' He did not want to look at the third.

The rest of the evening passed quietly until ten minutes to eleven when Professor Dumbledore told him to leave and return again the following morning.

~#~

The majority of the term continued in a similar pattern, with Sirius avoiding every student he possibly could and they, in return, avoiding him. He continued to eat his meals alone and attend various labour-intensive detentions. The only difference to his usual routine occurred when homework was dropped altogether and instead replaced by studying for the upcoming O. .

Sirius had not thought the end of the year was so close until he received his exam timetable towards the end of June. He had just three weeks of school left before he had to leave and join his detestable family. Even with his current situation, Sirius would much rather be at school than at Grimmauld Place.

~#~

Sirius had never felt so prepared for any exams in his life. Thanks to his evening detentions with both teachers and the headmaster, he had studied far more than he usually would have done. Though he was naturally gifted at the practical side of many of his subjects, he tended to struggle with the theory as he just didn't have the patience to sit down and learn it.

Hence, going into his first exam, Potions theory, he felt quietly confident. While many other students were frantically writing down answers and crossing out words or toying with their quills until they began to fray, Sirius sat in his chair calmly going from question to question. He even found that he had finished with ten minutes to spare.

During the Defence Against the Dark Arts exam, the following Thursday, Sirius barely held back a laugh before it escaped from him. 'List the features of a werewolf that distinguish them from animals' for six marks. While the easiness of the question had made him laugh, the topic brought depression as he remembered why the question was so easy.

The following question did nothing to ease this feeling either, 'explain the best ways to deal with werewolves' for ten marks. Again, an easy question but the subject matter was uncomfortable.

Shifting in his seat, Sirius quickly scratched down a quick but detailed answer before hastily moving onto the next question on counter-jinxes.

Once the exam had finished, Sirius was one of the first to leave the room, despite being sat near the front. He desperately needed to get away and breathe.

Exiting the Entrance Hall through the Great Oak doors, Sirius initially headed towards the Black Lake but upon realising that many other students were also making their way there to relax in the sun after their exams he instead walked parallel to it. When he reached the outskirts of the Forbidden Forest he began walking along its border before passing out of sight of the school and its students.

Stood behind the groundskeeper's hut, he wondered if his emotions would be easier to deal with if her were in another form. He had not transformed into Padfoot since before the Willow Incident as it brought back too many bad memories and bitter feelings. However, he knew that the dog's mind was far simpler than his own and perhaps he would be able to run off a little of his restless energy that had been building up recently.

It took a little more focusing on the corner of his mind that belonged to Padfoot than usual before he could concentrate enough to transform. When he was on all fours, Sirius took off at full speed into the depths of the forest.

The feeling was blissful. He had forgotten how simple life was as a dog and how natural it felt for him. He always loved running on all fours ever since he had first managed the transformation, it was so much freer.

Yet, in the back of his mind a warning voice called for him to remember that he still had another exam in an hour and a half. It wouldn't do for him to miss an exam because he was running wild in the Forbidden Forest.

After around an hour of chasing rabbits and foxes (unfortunately he could find no more dangerous animals than these) he returned once more to the outskirts of the forest. Noticing that many of the fifth year students were returning back to the school he decided to change back into his human form.

Striding out of the forest he found that he felt considerably better than he had for a while. He hadn't realised how restless he had gotten without his usual mischief, night-wanderings and frequent escapades with the Marauders. Sirius was naturally an energetic child and often struggled to sit still or concentrate for long periods of time. It had helped a great deal to run with such freedom and carelessness out of bounds for a while.

~#~

The rest of the exams passed relatively easily with the only problems occurring in his History of Magic exam. Sirius had never done well in this subject though and it certainly didn't help that their teacher was so boring that he repeatedly managed to send half the class to sleep within the first ten minutes of every lesson.

Professor Dumbledore had not received a single complaint from any of Sirius' teachers; probably an all-time record for him as he usually couldn't go a week without getting in some form of trouble. After his final detention with the headmaster Sirius handed in the extended essay on werewolves he had been asked to complete.

It had been painful for him to research as he discovered what other people thought of werewolves as none of the books were written from a pro-magical creatures point of view. It also helped him to understand the extent of his betrayal as the risks of Remus being caught were huge and appeared largely to be very painful.

Despite his new understanding of Remus' situation, none of the Marauders had made any further contact with Sirius since his visit to the hospital wing around a month ago. It broke his heart that some of the only people he felt he could trust no longer wanted to know him. Yet, he accepted his isolation from them as he knew he had done wrong and didn't deserve their friendship and compassion. He felt lifeless and empty almost all the time without them, knowing there were increasingly few people on the planet who cared if he existed or not.

~#~

As the end of term arrived, Sirius didn't go back to his dormitory to retrieve his trunk and other belongings. Even if he had wanted to get them back he didn't know if the other boys would be willing to let him in.

So it was with a heavy heart and the few belongings the Room of Requirement had given him that he walked alone to the Hogwarts Express. There he found an empty compartment near the front of the train and remained in isolation as the train bore him towards an even darker and grimmer six weeks.

I'm not entirely happy with this chapter as it's mostly just a filler chapter and nothing really happens. I tried to put some interesting bits in but I don't think it really worked. Sorry.

I'm sorry for the delay, I have no excuses. Though I do have a new found respect for the incredible writers who post epic new chapters weekly. I do not know how they do it.