Jonathan could see the clouds below them growing thicker, darker. It was going to rain and as the plane landed he felt the sickness settling in his gut. Luke's hand was on his shoulder the entire walk through the airport for comfort or to keep him from running, one of the two. They stopped by their hotel, leaving their bags. Jonathan grabbed his small back pack and tossed it over his shoulder before they headed back down the elevator again. His stomach was in his throat.

"Is it too late to turn around and go home?" He asked knowing it was pointless, he was just so stressed out he didn't know what else to say.

"Yes. You are way too close to be turning around now." Luke grinned at him. "It'll be okay."

Jonathan dug his fingers into his own leg like he always did when he wanted to rip his hair out, "Can you just . . . . fucking stop acting like this is going to end with a basket full of puppies, fucking flowers raining from the sky and everyone hugging each other. Because it's not and I would rather jump off of a building than face him. God damn it."

"Wow." Luke snorted on a laugh. "I said it was going to be okay. I didn't say it was going to be perfect. He fucking cares about you and you two get along better than any of us and are stuck up each other's ass. So even if he does hate you, it won't last."

"You are such a terrible pep-talker. I swear to God, this is why I never wanted you on my dodge-ball team in P.E."

Luke cut his eyes over at him, "You take that back. We always lost because you were so clumsy and couldn't stay on your feet. Not because of my anti-climatic pep-talks."

"I was a fucking freshman and a complete bean pole with no muscle back then. So fucking yeah, I was clumsy." Jonathan groaned and rubbed his face hard. "Why are we arguing about this? My life is about to end and we're yelling about something that happened literally thirteen years ago."

"I don't know. All I said was that it was going to be okay. If he hits you, I'll hit him."

Jonathan shook his head, "Gee, thanks. That'll solve everything."

Luke pressed his hand against his face, "Stop. Just . . . . fucking chill out."

"Sorry." Jonathan sighed against the large hand smushing the side of his face in.

He listened to the whining of the cab's breaks as they came to a stop against the sidewalk. The crowd outside already had him nervous and he took several deep breaths before he dug around in his bag. Luke rolled his eyes at him and they got out of the cab.

"God, it's gonna rain isn't it?" Evan looked up at the gathering clouds.

"Aye, looks like it." Brian clapped him on the back. "Don't worry, they'll be here soon."

"I know. It just never rains here and of all the days it had to be this one." He crossed his arms across his chest and shifted back and forth on his feet. He'd been standing with the guys for hours it seemed like, waiting for Luke and Delirious to show up. For hours he searched the crowds for a face he didn't even know. A face he'd imagined fifteen thousand different ways, all different, but all too much like someone he still couldn't forget.

"I see them." Mini said excitedly and stood on the bench he had been sitting on and waved his arms in the air. Evan's heart almost jumped out of his chest and he craned his neck to see through the crowd and there was Luke and his signature sunglasses and beside him . . . a guy.

Evan broke into a smile.

Delirious was wearing his black 'shark-eating-a-cheeseburger' shirt and on his face was a hockey mask.

"So fucking typical." Evan muttered to himself grinning like an idiot as they got closer, his heart beating impossibly faster. The closer they got the better he looked. Christ. His shirt fit him perfect. Snug and hugging the lean muscle of his arms. Evan noticed his hands, long strong fingers that were restless, twisting and clenching into fists.

Jonathan was nervous and it was getting harder for Evan to swallow.

Fucking hell.

He'd waited so long for this. He'd waited years to finally meet the one person that made sense and actually knew him deep down to the core. He'd waited forever to reach for his outstretched hand, to pull him into a tight warm hug and listen to him laugh in his ear. Jonathan felt nice against him and he felt an intense tingling everywhere their bodies met. Evan was hyper-aware of him and that was a bit overwhelming.

"Hey." He said and his voice was deep and relaxed, smooth.

"Hi." Evan smiled and he felt himself treading water when Jonathan's fingers slid down his arm as he stepped away. He even smelled good and his man crush for the guy multiplied itself by ten in seconds. Jonathan's eyes were blue, sky blue with flecks of baby blue gathered around his irises. Staring was something that Evan couldn't help because he was trying to picture the rest of his features beneath the mask and based on his eyes and the way he could see them pulling at the corners as he smiled, he was attractive.

"So, Delirious." Tyler sauntered over, lips poised and ready to strike up conversation. "When are you going to show us your good looks?"

Jonathan shrugged, "Whenever I feel like it, bitch."

Tyler laughed and bumped fists with him, "That's what I like to hear. Classic Delirious."

"Hey, Mini." Delirious made his way around the boys and Evan stepped to the side, giving them space as they met and hugged. Evan glanced over and caught Luke's eyes. The man grinned and gave him a nod and something felt off about it, the way he was watching him. It wasn't uncomfortable, but it was almost like he was studying, observing his actions and Evan couldn't figure it out. But it didn't matter because Jonathan was walking his way again and he stuck to his shoulder like he did online.

"You guys want to walk around?" Evan asked. "There's some give-aways and stuff going on outside close by."

"Sure." Jonathan nodded and he never left his side. Luke never took his eyes off of them either.

Evan wanted to say that it was strange how they fell into step automatically or how the silence between them wasn't awkward, but it wasn't. It was comfortable and he still felt the electricity running along the surface of his skin where their arms were touching. It felt normal to be beside him, slightly looking down at him, about half an inch. He was perfect and he hadn't even seen his face yet.

"So, how do you like it here?"

"It's crowded." Jonathan said. "I don't like crowds. I like the atmosphere just not all the people."

Evan grinned and brushed his arm against his. "Me neither. But I have to deal with it, you know."

"Publicity, I know. It sucks. That's why I haven't ever come out into the open. I don't know if I could deal with it."

"I think you'd be good at it."

"Thanks." Jonathan sounded like he was smirking. It was only then that Evan caught sight of the earring in his ear.

That's hot.

There was a small piece of a tattoo showing beneath his collar and Evan was heating up and the only thing that shook him from his haze was the loud crack of thunder overhead. The crowd began to scatter, searching for shelter as the rain began to fall lightly on their heads. The guys made their way back towards the main event which was indoors and for a moment Evan was separated from his companion.

"Jonathan." Luke grabbed his arm when he had an opening and Delirious felt the anxiety rising like acid in his throat.

"I know, Luke. I'm working myself up to it. I can't rush this."

"Just remember, whatever happens, happens."

Jonathan took a deep breath and gave him a nod, watching his best friends meld with the bustling crowd surrounding him, disappearing. He twisted his head around trying to find Evan again and when he spotted his brown eyes smiling at him he knew he was going to die today. Either Evan was going to kill him with his bare hands, or he was going to run into traffic and end his own life. There was no pleasant outcome and he didn't know how he was going to do this.

How the fuck was he going to tell Evan, one the most important people in his life, that he was a liar? How was he supposed to come up with the words or courage to say I am Liam.

He didn't have much time to ponder on the thought because Evan was pushing his way through the people and taking his arm in his with a smile that had Jonathan feeling like he wasn't really there. This wasn't real. He was just as perfect as the first time he saw him come around the playing station after he'd beat him at Call of Duty. His hands were firm yet gentle against his skin, just like how he was at PAX. So careful with him as he nipped at his hips, his neck.

God damn it.

He couldn't get the image out of his mind. It looped in his head, Evan pulling him into the room, pushing him against the wall tearing him apart and eating him alive. Jonathan could feel his fingers shaking.

"Evan, I need to tell you something."

"Shit. Hold up."

Jonathan turned and Evan was reaching back onto the ground for his lanyard that had fallen out of his pocket. His arm had slid down Jonathan's and their fingers had linked. Evan stood tall once again, Jonathan pulling his weight towards him in an effort to help him regain his balance. Evan grinned crookedly at him until he noticed the pulse pounding in he other man's neck and the subtle but obvious tremble in his fingers that seemed uncertain resting in his.

He glanced down at Jonathan's hand in his and the clouds above broke, sending heavy thick rain down upon them, the smell of wet concrete was strong, but he couldn't move. His eyes were stuck on the tattoo residing on the inside of Jonathan's forearm; a flower, blue, purple, and green surrounded by vintage leaves and thorns.

It was beautiful.

And he remembered it.

"Liam."

"Hm?" He hummed, drowsy from the mad sex they'd just had, his legs tangled with Evan's in the sheets.

"How many tattoos do you have?" Evan asked softly and kissed the flower on his forearm, his lips barely brushing the skin and he watched Liam's fingers twitch.

He watched him look up at the ceiling and count in his head. "Ssssseven? Yeah, no, six."

"That is incredibly hot." Evan mumbled against his skin. "I like the one on your shoulder. I like them all but this one is my favorite."

He traced the lines up his bicep to his neck feeling goosebumps rise on his skin and then he kissed them down, hearing Liam's breathing even out. Evan smiled. The man had fallen asleep and he stayed awake for as long as he could hold his eyes open, listening to him breathe, watching his fair skin in the dim moonlight coming through the windows.

He didn't want to say goodbye tomorrow. He didn't want to leave this bed.

"Evan?"

He blinked, coming back to reality and the rain had soaked into his clothes making them cling to his skin. And it was then that he saw only one ear on Jonathan's head had an earring. The other was bare. Breath was something he did not possess and he was having a hard time remembering what his lungs were even for. That flower stared him down and he knew.

He fucking knew right then.

He knew who Delirious was.

Panic? No, he wasn't panicking, but he finally managed to pull air into his lungs inhaling lukewarm rain water as it fell and flooded the sidewalk they stood on. Jonathan was staring holes into him and Evan saw how scared he looked beneath that mask of his that was completely useless at this point, because he knew. And he couldn't stop thinking about how the tattoo showing beneath his color seemed so familiar now, only because he'd seen it before and he knew what it looked like, he knew how far down it went and where it stopped.

"Evan, say something.

"What the hell are they doing? They're getting soaked." Tyler said as they stood near the doorway inside the building. It was a ghost town outside except for the two men standing alone in the monsoon that had blown in.

Luke felt the fear creep up his spine, "Fuck. It's happening."

"What's happening?"

But Luke didn't hear a word he said and he couldn't keep his eyes off the scene unfolding before him. Evan had such a tight grip on Jonathan's arm and the longer he stood there watching, the more he thought he was wrong about how this was going to turn out. It didn't look good.

Evan's breaths weren't evening out and he felt the anger rising in place of the anxiety and it hurt.

"Take it off."

"Evan -"

"Take it off."

Evan felt him shaking beneath his touch, so he let him go, watching his handprint fade on his skin.

Jonathan was frozen in place while the rain beat down on him and when he finally managed to get his hands moving, he slowly pushed at the bottom of his hockey mask, the rain dripped from the tip of his nose, his eyelashes.

He felt like he was going to puke. "I told you that you were going to hate me."

He pushed it to the top of his head and he couldn't pick his eyes up, he couldn't look at him.

Evan's hands ran through his wet hair and he didn't know what he felt because it was a mixture of everything.

Delirious. No. Jonathan.

Liam.

His eyes as blue as the day he first saw them, shaking his hand, smiling.

"This whole time . . . it was you."

Jonathan finally forced himself to look up at him and when he met his eyes he felt a flame between them. Whether it was lust or anger, he didn't know.

Maybe it was both.

"Why didn't you fucking tell me?!" Evan nearly screamed, his voice breaking along with his composure.

Jonathan flinched at his words because he knew this was inevitable, but he wasn't prepared for it; the end of their friendship. He was never ready as many times as he'd played this out in his head and he couldn't get over the look on Evan's face; the betrayal, the hurt, the pure disbelief that had his eyes red with tears. Jonathan felt his own swelling.

"I couldn't."

"You couldn't? Do you have any fucking idea how many nights I sat up thinking about how I would never see his face again?! Your face?!" Evan pulled at his hair and paced back and forth in front of him. "Any idea at all?!"

"Yes!" Jonathan snapped. "I fucking know."

Evan almost pushed him, but instead he pressed a firm finger to his chest, "I told you everything. Damn it. You listened to me spill to you and you just took it, listened to me suffer over you and you just sat there and did nothing."

Jonathan pushed his hand away and his defense rose before he could stop it. He was just as torn about it as Evan was. Evan wasn't the only one who was suffering.

"Yeah, I did. I listened to you, let you confide in me because that's what friend's do, Evan. And this has been just as fucking hard for me as it's been for you."

"Don't make this about you!"

"I'm not! This is about both of us! Can we fucking talk this out like two grown men?" Jonathan threw his hockey mask to the ground.

Evan took a deep breath, trying to get past the feeling of falling. Jonathan's face was so perfect, just the same as he'd remembered except back then it carried a different name. He tried to get past the beating of his heart and how much it hurt. He tried to get past the urge to grab his face and press his lips against his, to feel him. He'd ached for it for months, dreamed about it and here he was right there in front of him, but he was someone he thought he trusted at one point, someone he thought he knew and he couldn't let that go.

"You lied to me . . . . Jonathan." Evan said as he calmed down. The rain was steadily coming down and his voice was tired, resigned.

"The only thing I lied about was where I worked." Jonathan huffed. "Fucking mattress firm. I didn't lie about anything else. That guy you got to know, wandered around Boston with, laughed with, gamed with, got drunk and . . . . every fucking bit of that was me, Evan. Every word, every look, every touch. That was me. My middle name is Liam, I like fruity drinks and pizza, and you're my kind of person. Always have been and I've always been so fucking insecure and I hate that about myself and I hate how scared I always was that you wouldn't like me in person. That's why I did it because I needed to know."

Evan stood there in silence and watched Jonathan look at feet. "Now I know and I'm sorry that I kept it from you. I was just so fucking scared when I woke up that day. I didn't want it to go that far, but you were so good. I've never been one to make huge decisions, I never handle it well and walking out on you was the best option for me at the time. I didn't have to face you, but I knew I would have to eventually and if I could go back and change it, I would. I would tell you who I was, but what's done is done and I can't take it back."

Evan fumbled around his mind for what he wanted to say, what he needed to say but he couldn't find words and he couldn't focus. All he could see was the man standing soaking wet in front of him, looking like a hurt puppy, blue eyes red with guilt and tears.

"I need to think." Evan muttered and wiped the rain from his face only for it to be replaced with more. "I can't . . . "

He felt like his lungs were crushing in on themselves again and he needed to go. Anywhere but here. Somewhere where Jonathan and his blue eyes weren't looking back at him reminding him of how fucking pretty he was beneath him and how soft his red lips were, wide open and producing sounds that could be the very definition of sin. He squeezed his eyes shut, turned, and walked away. Evan didn't know where he was going, he just went and it took every ounce of willpower that he possessed not to look back because he needed to figure this out before he let another word leave his mouth. Looking at the guy he had dreamed about since the night he slept with him wasn't helping him in the slightest.

Jonathan watched him go, his heart breaking more than it already had, if that was even possible. He had never wanted to scream so bad in his entire life, just yell his name and tell him what he really wanted to say.

He wanted to say that he hated himself, that he'd laid awake countless nights thinking about Evan just as much as Evan thought about him. He wanted to say that he had mapped out every imperfection on his ceiling and he knew how much he needed to dust his fan but he would just keep putting it off, staring at it instead while it spun in circles. Jonathan wanted to say that every song he heard put his face front and center in his mind, haunting him, making him feel the guilt all over again tenfold.

Evan made him hurt.

"Uhh. Does someone want to explain what the hell just happened?" Craig asked, standing there with his arms up in question.

"You've already met him before." Luke muttered.

"What?"

"Delirious." Luke turned and looked at the guys. "You've already met him. He was at PAX."

Tyler stared at him for a moment, confused. He ran through his memory and Luke saw it the moment he realised. "Oh my God. It's, uh. Shit what was his name?"

"Who?" Lui piped in.

"The guy. The guy uh . . . . fuck. The one we ran into that morning and then Evan dragged him around everywhere, to Dave & Buster's. I called the guy a fag and Evan got so pissed and they left." Tyler rambled and Lui's eyes widened.

"Liam?"

"Yes!" Tyler said happily until he realised what that meant. "Holy fuck. That was Delirious."

Craig stared out at the man standing alone in the pouring rain. "Why didn't he just tell us who he was?"

Luke folded his arms. "Because that's just who he is. He told me he wanted to meet you all, but he didn't want his face to change the way anything was between you guys. And he wanted to meet Evan, more than anything. He was scared he wouldn't like him in real life. So he pretended he was someone else."

Brian tapped his finger on the glass, pointing as Jonathan, "Okay, but why did they just fight? I'd think it was funny. Like, hey man it was me all along, ha ha, I'm such a fuckin' trickster."

Tyler eyed Luke and he knew that he knew, too. "It's a bit more complicated that."

Brian raised one of his perfect eyebrows. "Then would you care to explain?"

Luke sighed, "Alright, listen. None of this leaves this circle or I will hunt down each and every one of you. Got that?"

"Got it." They all nodded and crowded in closer away from the people moving about.

Luke lowered his voice, "They slept together."

The longer Jonathan stood there the colder he felt. The longer he stood there, the smaller Evan got as he walked down the vacant sidewalk until the haze of rain made him disappear completely. He felt the thin string that was holding their friendship together stretch and if he thought about it hard enough, maybe it wasn't there at all. Perhaps it was just wishful thinking, hoping that Evan would turn and come running back to him.

It was funny. That was why he stood there looking out at nothing, because he thought he just might. But he didn't.

Jonathan moved his feet and he could feel the water squishing in between his toes in his shoes as he walked in the opposite direction. He didn't know where he was going, he was just going. It didn't matter. Everything he'd ever wanted had just walked away with the other half of his heart that he'd first taken all those months ago.

He didn't have anything left and he walked until he found himself sitting on the side of a concrete wall, looking down at the Los Angeles river that he recognized immediately from Grand Theft Auto. The slanted walls that led down into the shallow water were covered in immaculate graffiti of different shades and styles and personalities. It took him back to the times when that was all he would play with the guys, with Evan. The memories flooded him and he couldn't breathe.

"Delirious! Delirious! Look at me! Look into my eyes!"

"I am!"

He felt the warm tears and he shook his head at himself before he let his head fall into his hands.

"Delirious! I'm coming!"

"Evan! Help!"

"Get in!"

They were a fucking team and they always had been and that was gone, washing away right before his eyes and there wasn't anything he could do to stop it.

Luke had Jonathan's mask in his hands as he watched him sit alone by the river, head in his hands, while the weight of the world settled on his shoulders. The guys were quiet behind him but they'd insisted on helping him find him. One by one he watched them throw their legs over the wall and take a seat, leaving a seat right beside him.

It was a surreal moment, having most of the gang sitting there like they were in Los Santos discussing what mayhem they're were going to cause later. He found himself grinning sadly at the image and he sat on the wall beside his best friend. Jonathan looked around at all of them as the rain dissipated, leaving a small drizzle in it's wake. His eyes were puffy and red and he wiped the water from his face.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell any of you."

"We don't care, man." Lui said with a smirk. "You did what you had to do. We're cool with it."

"Yeah, and it's nice to officially meet you, whether or not some of us already have." Craig smiled down at him.

Tyler cleared his throat and met his eyes, "I'm sorry I called you a fag. It was childish of me and I'll try to educate myself a little, like you said."

Jonathan actually smiled at that and nodded, "It's okay, Tyler. I think I'm over it.

Brock finally spoke up, "How about we go have some fun?"

Jonathan smile faded and he looked back out at the water, "I don't think I'll be capable of having fun for a while."

"Nonsense." Brian scoffed and slung his legs back over the wall. "Come on! While Evan is off sulking we are going to do our duty as your friends and cheer you up. Now, asses up, let's go!"

Jonathan didn't really want to but Luke was pulling him up and over and dragging back to into the bustle of people that were once again walking down the wet sidewalk. It took a while for them to make their way back towards the convention but Jonathan did feel the time pass. He was too busy daring his eyes at every face, his heart jumping when someone looked like they might by the dark haired Asian, his heart dropping every time it turned out that they weren't. He didn't know why he kept hoping that Evan would be there in the crowd or that he might show up, run up to him, forgive him for lying. That he might forgive him for sleeping with him and then leaving him like he was nothing. But he wasn't there. He never saw him and it started to set in slowly that Evan may not ever want to see him again.

That fear settled in, the dread making him sick to his stomach and he swallowed it down as the thought burned through him like fire for the rest of the day. It burned through him into the night as the guys dragged him around, trying what they could to take his mind off of it. He felt it searing his insides as they pulled him into a club where he could smell the sweat in the air. The bass was vibrating in his ear as he moved around the thick cluster of bodies, the beat was pounding in his chest, rattling him but it made him forget for a moment and he found his head hit the wall behind him as his mind moved with the rhythm and he felt alright.

He felt okay up until the moment his eyes were drawn to a boy, dark haired and pretty, and his tongue as it slipped into another boy's mouth. Jonathan blinked and he couldn't stop his mind from going there, that one place he'd tried not to let it go all day.

"Fuck . . ." That was the only thing Jonathan could manage to mutter as Evan's hands stripped him, pulling at his jeans that slid so easily down his legs. His socks were nonexistent, one hanging from the lamp across the room and he could tell you where his shirt was to save his life. Evan leaned over him, placing kisses on his hips before sliding his fingers beneath his briefs and pulling. His dick was set free and his hands immediately went for it for some sort of relief, but Evan batted his hand away before he stood to his full height at the end of the bed, tossing Jonathan's briefs into oblivion. He drank in the sight of him.

Jonathan pushed himself to his elbows only to witness the sexiest thing he'd ever seen, which was the sight of Evan taking his clothes off. His fingers slid up his torso, the tan toned skin of his stomach greeting him the longer he watched. Evan pulled the fabric over his head and let his fingers trail down to the button of his jeans, where he unbuttoned them, sliding the zipper down to reveal his black briefs that were getting painfully tighter the longer he stood there looking down at the perfection that was laid out across his bed. He pushed his jeans down and before he could get his fingers beneath his underwear, Jonathan slid to the edge of the bed and ran his fingers up his thighs, around to his perfect ass before he pulled the soft material down his long legs.

His cock rested against the side of Jonathan's face and he wasted no time taking it in his mouth, smiling up at Evan with his eyes when he heard the noise that left the man' lips. His fingers carded through his hair and he slowly thrust his hips. Evan was hitting the back of his throat and it was almost too much and Jonathan was thinking about how much he'd rather have him inside of him when Evan pulled him off with a small moan, pushing him back onto the bed.

Evan crawled up his body with lust blown eyes and he kissed him. He kissed him like he'd never kissed anyone, working him open, sucking the spit from his tongue and Jonathan was a shaking mess beneath him. He tasted Evan and it was a taste he would never forget.

"Jonathan."

He blinked again to find Luke standing in front of him looking concerned. Reality sunk in once again and his lungs began sucking in air all on their own and at their own pace, which was erratic and random and he couldn't control it.

So he ran.

He ran until he felt the door beneath his cold hands and the warm California air hitting him in the face. He ran until he couldn't hear anyone calling his name anymore. He ran until he couldn't feel his feet beneath him or the confused faces staring at him as he flew by. He ran until he saw the familiar sign of the hotel.

He ran a little faster.

The boardwalk was closed and it was quiet. The longer Evan sat on the edge of the ocean the more he hated himself. He should've went back earlier but he didn't know what he would've said to him. He didn't trust himself to say anything that made any sense and he didn't know how to explain what he felt. But, maybe he should have tried at least.

His phone buzzed and he picked it up without a second thought out of habit.

"Evan?"

"What, Tyler?"

"Are you coming back around any time soon?"

He looked down at the dark water below him, "Why does it matter?"

Tyler huffed, "Why does it matter? One, you are blowing this way out of proportion. Two, I know you slept with him and I know he lied, but I also know you still like him. And three, Delirious took off and Luke is trying to talk him out of getting on the flight he just booked home. At this very second. So, that's why it fucking matters. You shouldn't have just left him standing there on the sidewalk in the pouring rain. You should've given him an answer. I know you probably didn't have one at the time, but he had his. He showed up, he showed his face and he wanted to talk it out. But you just walked off."

Evan was silent and Tyler ran his hands through his hair while the guys paced around him. "Listen, Evan. If he was everything you ever wanted and he just showed up and put himself right in front of you, whether he lied or not, wouldn't you at least want to try again? Talk it out? Or start over?" He heard Evan breathing and it almost sounded like he was running. "I know that you're upset about it and I know you don't want to see him right now, but just listen to me. Yeah, Jonathan has some issues but he worked past them and worked up the fucking courage to go to Boston and meet you. He was so fucking shy and he still did it, just so he could see you. I don't know about you, but that says something to me. It says that he's admired you for years. It says that he has enough insecurities to pretend to be someone else because he was that worried about what you thought about him. Yes, he met us too, but he was there for you. He stuck to you like fucking glue and he's been stuck to you for a long time. Way before you guys ever met. And you've been just as stuck to him. It's just how you two have always been and we have all always seen it that way. You guys are a team and I'm pretty fucking positive that you mean everything to him. I'm pretty fucking positive that he loves you. He still wants to be with y-"

"TYLER!" Evan yelled.

He was running.

"What time is the flight?" Evan asked while he caught his breath.

"Airport!" He heard him tell someone, presumably a cab driver. Tyler felt a smile cross his lips and the guys started high-fiving each other.

Tyler check his watch, "Fifteen minutes."

"Fuck!" Evan rubbed his face hard. "There is no fucking way I can make it."

"How far are you?"

"At least ten minutes and it'll probably take me twelve years to get through the airport and to his gate." Evan felt sick. "Can you just tell him I'm coming?"

"No, he wouldn't believe me anyway." Tyler glanced over at the two bickering men as he and the guys stood off to the side in the waiting area of the airport. "We've said everything we can think of to make him stay but he's made up his mind. He's convinced himself that you hate him and never want to see him again. Luke won't force him to do anything so if he wants to go home he's going to let him.

"God damn it." Evan groaned, his heart was thrumming in his chest as the cab stopped at a red light.

"We'll stall him as long as we can. After that, he's gone." Tyler said and Evan was twisting his fingers in his hand. "Just . . . .h . .ry and get . . . "

"Tyler? Hello?" Evan called and looked down at his phone. He didn't have any cell service in the area and he was on the verge of crying they were driving so fucking slow.

"Jonathan, please. Leaving is not going to solve anything. He hadn't even talked to you yet." Luke tried but Jonathan was steadily moving away from him.

"Staying won't solve anything either and he hasn't talked to me because he doesn't want to. If I leave then he doesn't have to avoid me for the rest of the weekend. I'm just doing him a favor. We both win. I leave with what dignity I have left and he doesn't have to see my face again." He shrugged and kept moving back. Luke stepped toward him again.

"What are you going to do when you get home? Lay in your bed and stare at the ceiling?" He asked and it sounded more accusing than he wanted to and he saw Jonathan flinch.

"Yeah, I am actually. I'll do whatever I need to, to take my mind off of it, to forget and move on. It's done. Over. I'm leaving." He stood up straighter as they called for his flight. He tossed Luke his hockey mask. "Here, I won't need this anymore. I'm never showing my face again."

Luke looked down at the iconic piece of plastic in his hands then back up at the back of Jonathan's head as he walked away. He'd never felt like such a mess. The entire situation had gone completely out of hand and he wished they he had the nerve to tell Jonathan no every once in a while. He wished he had told him no when he asked to go to PAX with him. He wished a lot of things. But he didn't and here they were, they boys giving him sad looks and then they were running at him yelling and he didn't understand until he felt a heavy body early run him over. He was shoved to the side by someone big and when he regained his balance with the help of Lui he looked ahead at who it was and he caught a fleeting image of Evan as he tore through the crowd at an impossible speed.

It was loud and crowded and he didn't know what direction he was supposed to be running in until Tyler caught his eye and pointed left. His feet were moving without him telling them to but he had to slow down as the crowd thickened.

"Last call for Flight 141: Gate 4."

His heart was running faster than he was and he felt Jonathan's name leaving his lips but he couldn't hear it over the voices around him. He was closing in on the gate but it was still so far away and he saw it happen slowly, the guards closing the ropes, blocking it off.

And he saw him.

He saw the back of his head as he stepped onto the walkway to the plane, he saw him hand the lady his ticket, watched him turn and look back into the crowd and for a moment he though he might have seen him, but from the look of disappointment on his face . . . he didn't. Evan screamed for him again but it fell on deaf ears and he felt the helplessness hit him square in the chest and for the first time since he got out of the cab, he realised he couldn't breathe.

He slowed to a stop and put his hands on his knees, trying to calm down but not even oxygen could calm his racing mind or the ache in his heart.

He lost something in that moment. He lost the one thing that he wanted and knew that he'd never find again. He never apologised for just leaving him there wandering if he'd ever come back. He never got to kiss those fucking lips again.

"God damn it!" He cried out and pushed his way through the crowd and he absently pushed Lui's hand off of his shoulder when he tried to comfort him. Craig moved out of his way and Tyler gave him a small nod. But he felt another hand on him and the frustration crawled up his spine and he turned, ready to shove at whoever was there. It was Luke and he grabbed at his arms and spun him around until his back was against the wall.

"Evan!" He started, "You need to calm the fuck down!"

He tried to push off the wall but Tyler stepped up next to Luke and Evan thought against it. "He's gone! I fucked everything up and you want me to calm down?"

"It's not over, Evan." Tyler shook his head.

"You've got his number. Just call him." Brock suggested.

"He won't answer. He's good at ignoring people, trust me." Luke said.

"Then get another flight. Go after him." Craig said.

Evan went limp against Luke's hold, he was giving up and he knew they all felt it too. "I don't know where he lives."

There was silence until Luke gave a small laugh and stood back, releasing his hold on him. Evan stood there looking at him confused, still searching for his breath leaning against the wall for support. "What's funny?"

Luke shrugged. "I mean, did you forget that I've known him since he was like ten? I know where he lives, you idiot."