Onodera Ritsu didn't consider himself a very sentimental man. He didn't consider himself to be one who gets swept away easily or lost in the moment. He never thought of himself as a hopeless romantic or really any kind of romantic for that matter.
And yet here he was, 5:30 in the morning, fully awake, his body sore and tired, lying naked next to a man that he swore time and time again he didn't have feelings for. He should have left when he first woke up an hour ago, retreating to the sanctuary of his own apartment. But he didn't. Instead he laid there, staring at the serene face of the man before him.
The other looked so peaceful and calm, Ritsu just couldn't muster the strength that it seemed to take to leave.
The way that his mouth was slightly open, his chest rising and falling in a calm manner, the ever so soft snores coming from the slumbering man. He couldn't help himself but to stare at that face that seemed to have captivated him from day one. He understood why girls and even a few men at the office admired the other so much. Not only was he a remarkably handsome man, but he was smart and good at his job too. He had the potential to go far, and so many people saw that in him and yearned for his heart because of it.
And yet it was Ritsu that held the man's heart. He couldn't understand how the older man could hold these sorts of feelings for him when he rejected the other at every turn. He rejected him time and time again, and yet Masamune still pursued him with his heart on his sleeve and words of love on his lips.
He knew it was wrong to put the other through this, to take his love but give nothing in return. But what was he supposed to do? Because although it was tempting, the others offers to treat him well, feed him dinner, spoil him, love him, Ritsu just couldn't let himself take the risk of getting hurt again. And even if he did, what was the point? How far could they even go? They couldn't get married, they couldn't really have a family, there didn't seem to be a future for two men. Not in Japan at least.
So even though he knew it was wrong to lead the other on and give him false hope why was he still there lying in the mans apartment, sharing his bed and taking in his warmth? He needed to leave, to get as far as possible before this feeling in his heart got any stronger. But he couldn't, he was trapped by the handsome man before him, trapped by his feelings and the silent pleas in the back of his mind that begged the brunette to stay and give him a chance.
Maybe he could be happy with the other.
Ritsu sighed softly, tugging the blanket over himself more while accidentally pulling it off of the other, exposing his well sculpted chest. The younger blushed but didn't look away, his eyes were drawn in by the other's body. It wasn't fair, why was the other so handsome and well defined? How did he have any time with the busyness of work to exercise? Even as a teenage the elder was more defined than him, his shoulders broader and his body lean but full of muscle.
It just wasn't fair.
Ritsu was so much smaller than him, and yet even with their size difference the smaller male couldn't help but admit how well their bodies fit together and how nice it would probably feel to lie with his body on the other's, their legs entwined and his head gently resting on his chest, long warm fingers running through his hair and a voice whispering sweet nothings.
Ritsu blushed harder at the realization of his thoughts and quickly rolled over, his face burned and his heart pounded with concealed yearning. He wanted that. He wanted to lie together on lazy Sunday mornings, letting the warmth of the sun cover their exposed bodies. He wanted to be loved, to be cared for, but he was so afraid. He was so afraid of being hurt again that the risk seemed to out way the reward.
Slowly but steadily, he turned and looked back at the slumbering prince. He still showed no sign of waking any time soon and Ritsu's sense of longing was starting to get the better of him. Maybe it wouldn't hurt, just for a short while, to give in.
And so he did just that.
He moved closer, careful not to wake the other, and very gently rested his head on the mans chest, his hand laying next to him on the chest. He pulled the blanket higher up over the two of them and pressed his body lightly against his bosses. The gentle beat of the mans heart sounded in his ear, the light thumps reminding him of a lullaby, slowly drifting the brunette away. Maybe it would hurt to sleep for a little while. Just until morning. He can worry about everything else later. But for now, Ritsu would allow himself to lay there and to be loved by the man, just as long as Takano never found out about it.
A few minutes later, once the green eyed male had fallen asleep, a large hand gently ran its fingers through the chestnut locks. A soft deep voice sounded in the darkness and made its way into the editors dreams.
"Sleep, sleep well and dream of us."