Thanks Erica - my beta reader - and Jen, for helping with the children stories and song.
WHITE NIGHT
Mellie couldn't help but smile as she walked down the steps of the Capitol. She followed her heart. She'd done the right thing. And this time she did it for herself. There was no scheme, no second agenda and mostly, there was no one to benefit from her actions other than possibly herself. She left that podium with a sense of self accomplishment. And now she wanted nothing more than the warm embrace of her son - the only good thing that came out of all those years of living in a glass house. His smile was one of the few things that made everything worth.
"We're here, ma'am" she heard her driver say.
"Merry Christmas, Jeff" she smiled at him through the review mirror.
"Merry Christmas, ma'am" Jeff replied with a smile.
She smiled as she walked towards the front door of her Georgetown mansion with her hair still up with a pen. As soon as she put the key in the lock she heard tiny footsteps in the other side.
"Mommyyyyy" the little boy screamed as soon as Mellie opened the door.
"Hey baby" stated Mellie as she bent down to her son's eye level before planting a kiss on his cheek.
"Come see what sissy and me made" Teddy took his mother's hand in his.
"Oh my, cookies!" Stated Mellie when she entered the kitchen. "Please tell me that's, chocolate?" She asked before kissing her daughter's temple.
"What else would it be?" Said Karen as her mother took a bite of the cookie she had in her hand.
"MOMMY!" Both ladies turned around when they heard the desperation in Teddy's voice. "That's for Santa!"
"Oh... I didn't know, baby." She walked towards him as she cleaned the crumbs from her face "But I don't think Santa will mind if mom eats a cookie or two" she says as she takes the boy in her arms before kissing him.
"Okay " Teddy shrugs his shoulder and starts fussing in his mother's embrace demanding to be put down.
Mellie put Teddy down as she said to her daughter "Can you look after Teddy for a while? I need to take a shower"
Karen nodded with a smile before watching her mother disappear from the kitchen "C'mon Teddy Bear let's put these cookies in the box"
Mellie was wrapped in her towel when she walked back into her room only to find her daughter sitting at the end of the bed. "He's watching tv" Karen answered her mother's silent question "I saw you today" she couldn't help but smile bright "You were amazing, mom"
"Thank you" mumbled Mellie as she applied cream to her legs.
"I mean it. You were amazing! And so fucking right!"
"Karen, language!"
"Sorry… I'm proud of you, mom. I really am." her words made Mellie stop her actions. "And I know Jerry would be too" Mellie sat down next to her and kissed Karen's temple.
"I had a little help you know…" said Mellie.
"I know you have your staff…"
"No… them too.. but I had a little help I wasn't counting on…"
"Susan Ross! I saw it, mom!"
"No… she helped too but she didn't do it on her own. It was Olivia" she placed a piece of hair behind Karen's ear.
"I'm still debating if I like her or not.. but she's good."
"Yeah… she's good"
"Actually… I got a little help from her too.." Karen saw the concern in her mother's eyes as she remembered the only time she'd asked Olivia Pope for help "I didn't want to run into dad so I asked her if she could go to Jerry's room… remember those ornaments we made when we were like six?"
"Of course I do! You wouldn't shut up until dad and I bought you all the supplies you needed to make them!"
"He had his in the residence. I knew where he kept it. I just didn't want to run into dad… so I asked her to get it. It's in my room along with mine… I thought maybe Teddy could put it up … after dinner… "
"I think… it'd be perfect" said Mellie with tears in her eyes before kissing her daughter's forehead. "Why don't you go help your brother change into his pjs before setting the table while I finish getting ready? And then I'll make us some pasta"
"Okay" said Karen before getting up. "I love you, mom" stated Karen before opening the door of her mother's room.
"I love you too, sweetheart" replied Mellie before her daughter left her room.
Mellie swept Teddy up into her arms when she was on her way to the living room making the little boy laugh "C'mon, Teddy bear sissy has something for you"
"What is it mamma?" asked the little boy as he played with his mother's curls.
"It's a gift from your big brother, Jerry" said Karen from the living room's entrance. "You see, when Jerry and I were a little older than you we made mom and dad buy us all this collage Christmas stuff.. so we could make this" Karen shows him the ornaments of Santa Claus and wrapped gifts she and her big brother made. "And every year we would put them in the tree… So, I'm gonna put mine over here…" stated Karen as she put the ornament she made at age six in the tree of the first Christmas she'd spend with just her mom. "And you put Jerry's…"
"Where?"
"Wherever you want, baby" said Mellie before kissing Teddy's temple.
The little boy made a thinking face before deciding where he was going to place the ornament. "Here" he said with a satisfied smile.
"It's perfect!" stated Karen with a huge smile on her face.
"Now it's time for bed" said Mellie "But you can sleep with me" she couldn't help but fall into the sadness of his face.
"And mom and I will read you a story!"
"The Night Before Christmas" was his favorite story of the season and Teddy made sure that would be the one his mother and sister would read to him that night. Each line was read by one of them.
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St Nicholas soon would be there.
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads.
And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap.
Teddy smiled with each verse. The little boy was entranced by the way his sister was telling him the story.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tinny reindeer.
With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!
Mellie felt her heart both soar with the happiness of the moment and the life long lasting hurt of never having her baby boy in her arms again. But that night she realized that Karen would never let his memory die, not just for herself but for her baby brother too. She smiled.
"Now Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! On, Cupid! on, on Donner and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky.
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of Toys, and St Nicholas too.
"And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof" just as Mellie was about to say her next words she looked down and smiled at the sight of her baby boy sleeping. She closed the book and place it on the floor before kissing the top of Teddy's head.
Karen leaned over her youngest brother and snuggled against her mother. Mellie smiled as she kissed the top of her daughter's head.
"At what time to do you wanna go to your father's tomorrow?" Asked Mellie as she caressed her daughter's arm while her other hand kept rubbing her son's belly.
"I'm not going"
"Karen... He's your father..." Mellie made her daughter look at her.
"He never asked me how I felt about moving in Olivia... So why bother?" Stated Karen before snuggling against her mother. "I'd much rather be here..." A silence stood between the two before Karen spoke again "Jerry would never go..." Mellie smiled at her words. She was right, Jerry was too protective over his mother to go after his father.
"If you don't want to go, I won't make you go. But at least call him. Okay, baby?"
"Okay..." Said Karen before closing her eyes "Mom, sing that song you used to when Jerry and I were little...?" She opened her eyes as smile graced her face.
With one hand caressing her son's belly and the other caressing her daughter's side Mellie started mumbling the same song she used to sing when her older babies were still babies. "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine" Karen closed her eyes as soon as her mother's voice started filling the room "You make me happy when skies are grey" Mellie smiled as she remembered the way Jerry would sing the words back to her. And how Karen would stop what she was doing the moment she would hear her voice. And just like now, she would curl up in her lap with her head pressed against her chest with eyes closed and smile on her lips. She had lost one of her sunshines in a blink of an eye - one moment he was there and the other he was gone. She took a tighter grip on the two sunshines she had by her side. If there was one good thing that came out from her son's death was cherishing the moments she had with Karen and Teddy. Her two sunshines that would warm even the coldest winter night.
You never know, dear, how much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away