Oh, my holy glaux. I'm so sorry, everyone! I'm such a bad updater! Will you forgive me? I've just been busy…

Well, my excuses are probably worthless wastes of your guys' valuable time. All I can say is, sorry again, and please review!

(PS: To all of y'all who say you have bloody eyes… Well, I'm sorry! Haha… Here, have a tissue. The bleeding should stop pretty soon.)

Pamela wondered if her forehead was dented. It wasn't good for one's health to be banging one's head against a computer so much, she was sure.

But then, it wasn't worth it to make all the poor people in the AMC section get high fevers, chills, and hives from their allergic reactions to Sues, was it?

Chapter three of "The Most Beautiful of Them All" was appalling. Not that chapters one and two hadn't been, just that this one was almost even worse. Almost. It was kind of hard to tell which one was worst. Pamela didn't want to submit herself to that kind of torture.

Chapter three had been only minimally edited by Pamela. Because of her strong objections to the content, Marjory had insisted that she was going to fire her beta altogether, and simply post more "pure" versions of her stories, like "dragons" had supposedly been pure.

Aka, with bad grammar and even worse writing.

Only threats at knifepoint had kept Flarismyman from resorting to such abominable acts. Okay, so maybe not quite knifepoint. It was something else… Something… worse. The worst nightmare for a bad-grammar-ed story.

The threat of being reported.

Hmm… That wasn't quite right, actually.

Most fantwits – pardon, fanfiction authors – didn't even know the report button existed. You know, the one down at the bottom? Where it says "submit review"? You can click on the arrow and select "report possible abuse".

Pamela was very intimate with this button.

Marjory, of course, hadn't known there was such a thing, and had panicked at the thought. Thus, chapter three was not going to go out raw with brain-shredding grammar (or lack thereof). It would not, however, be good.

Good! Ha! What a joke. "Marjory," "story," and "good" didn't belong in the same sentence without the word "NOT!"

Karen was revived by a slap around the face and a coffee mug shoved into her hands. She obediently drank up, thanking her roommate, who shook her head desparingly.

"Don'tchu have, like, homework?" demanded Sierra. She did.

"Mbe," slurred Karen. Translation: Maybe. Truth: Oh, yes.

Must… go… computer… read…

Marjory triumphantly clicked the "add" button. There! "The Most Beautiful of Them All" was updated! Three chapters, baby! She was so proud of herself. The chapter was perfect.
Yo, yo, yo, my homedoggz! Say hi, Ralphie! (-Ralphie buzzes-) Here you go!

AnYwAyZ, here's chappie three for y'all!

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Alai and Sledaifalefefth make their way to the buckets of meat, and all eyes are glued to them in their perfect beauty. Never has there been such a beautiful shade of gold on a dragon, never such a gorgeous queenrider. You practically have to shield your eyes to protect them from the radiant beauty. RADIANT, I'm telling you!

Why do the people stare, O Alai? asks Sledaifalefefth. One might assume that the dragon would call her rider by her full name, but the author can't be bothered to go back and look up Alai's name. It was really long, anyway, wasn't it?

Sooo… Next there's supposed to be some junk about Weyrling Classes… Blah blah. No one really likes reading that stuff, anyway. Who cares?

TIME SKIP! WOOT WOOT! WE'RE JUMPING FORWARD IN TIME! WHEEE!

Aiight.

So, Sledaifalefefth is now four Turns old and she and Alai are still beautiful and perfect and all the bronzeriders are falling over themselves so that they can impress them. The brownriders are starting a campaign to make brown-flying-gold flights common again. Blueriders are even contemplating letting their own dragons try in Sledaifalefefth's first mating flight. And some greenriders are considering becoming straight 'cos Alai is so amazing.

So one day Sledaifalefefth (A/N: its sooo hard to type sledaifalefefth's name! I'm gong 2 call her Sleddy frm now on, mkay? On wit da stry!) is looking really gold. She whips her tail around, yawning her mouth really really wide. She's feeling sexy.

Oh, Alai, she says coyly. I feel sexy.

Oh, my, Alai says, her eyes fluttering and a hand coming to rest delicately on her collarbone. You must be ready to mate, My Heart!

With that, they whisk away to the, um, place where the dragons eat. You know, the thingy with all the cows. Oh, well. That's not important.

So all the bronzeriders (and brownriders and blueriders and greenriders) are there, because they all desperately want to at least watch the beautiful motion of Sleddy and Alai. (A/N: sleddy sounds sooooooo kyoot!)

So a lot of dramatic stuff happens, and then Sleddy is flying. She soars and flaps and twists and sings and stuff, you know, dramatically and things like that.

Suddenly, she felt another dragon body press against hers…

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Ooh! Cliffie! Srry it's so short! But me and Ralphie are busy peoples (and machines). Plz review!!!!!

Hardly able to contain her excitement, Marjory signed in on the fanfiction website, grinning at her name: . She quickly clicked on . How many hits had chapter two of "The Most Beautiful of Them All" got? How many… reviews?

Ah… none.

What? It's been a whole ten minutes since I posted it! Marjory cried in her mind, outraged. What's taking those idiots so long? Grr…I need chocolate therapy.

Chocolate therapy lasted about four hours, so by the time Marjory got back to the computer (considerably paled and shaking from compu-withdrawl)… she had no new reviews.

Hm… hot-soaky-bath-with-a-book-and-some-more-chocolate therapy time!

Well, that therapy lasted long enough for Marjory to come to her computer with serious wrinkles from the water and gray bags under her eyes and minor vomiting from compu-withdrawl. With trembling fingers, she clicked on again…
Heh heh… Sorry again about the late update. It wasn't even that funny… But life has been hectic and I'm not in the funniest mood. Still, thanks for reading, and please review "The Most Beautiful of Them All" to make Marjory stop getting fat off of all that chocolate.