All Roads Lead To Hell

By: Paraflymore

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own Supernatural and if I did I would be way nicer to them all.

Summary: Cut my life into pieces...

Fighting For Nothing
Chapter Five:
"Last Resort"

"Cold Oak, South Dakota. A town so haunted, every single resident fled. Sounds like a nice vacation spot." Dean says as he shuts the trunk of the Impala.

Lila reaches for his hand. "We found him."

He nods, squeezing her fingers. "No. You did."

"I didn't help at all or anything..." Bobby says laying a map out on the trunk.

Lila smirks at him. "Thanks Bobby. We couldn't have figured it out without you."

"Bout damn time I got some recognition 'round here."

"What do we got?" Dean asks, eyeing him.

"Its about an hour drive, not sure what we will find when we get there."

"What do you mean?" Dean asks.

"Its been a long time since anyone has been there no telling what condition the roads are in."

Lila laces her fingers with Dean's trying to comfort him, but she knew he was well past being coddled. "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it..."

Bobby nods, folding the map back up and tucking it under his arm. "I'll lock up and we can go."

She turns to Dean the moment Bobby's back is to them, she takes his face between her hands and kisses him. Not for any other reason than because she needed to. His hand finds her waist and pulls her in closer, but she knows that this isn't the time or place for them to be doing this.

"Promise me," he breathes, pulling away from her slightly. "Whatever happens you won't leave me." He dips his forehead to hers.

"I'm not going anywhere, okay?"

It was just starting to get dark when they made it to Cold Oak. An eerie feeling crept over them as they tunred onto the dirt road leading into the town. Lila's had tightened around her shotgun as the Impala inched forward into the woods, and it seemed as if the darkness crept slowly around them until it was completely dark.

Then suddenly Dean cut the engine and it was even darker.

One thing she might never admit outloud, not even to Dean was that she had always been afraid of the dark.

"Roads washed out," He said from the front seat. "We have to go on foot from here."

Bobby turned a flashlight on and the knot in her chest loosened.

Dean's door creaks open and she follows suit, grabbing her shotgun and stepping out into the mud. Dean catches her arm as she waivers, keeping her from falling.

"Maybe you should stay here."

She rolls her eyes. "Please don't start this crap Dean, besides you made me promise not to leave you."

He smirks. "I knew that was going to come back to bite me in the ass."

A sharp pain shoot through her head and she doubles over, her shotgun goes tumbling into the mud and Dean catches her just in time before she does the same.

And everything is echoing, Dean's voice calling her name, yelling for Bobby to help, and Sam.

"Sam!" Dean yells.

"Dean!"

And then that man from her vision, that soldier with the super strength, plunges a knife into his back.

And then she hears the screaming.

She opens her eyes, shaking and sweating, realizing that the screaming was her own.

"What happened?" Dean asks, smoothing her hair out of her face. "What did you see?"

Lila swallows the lump in her throat. She tells herself that just because she saw it in her vision doesn't mean that it will come to light. The future can always ben changed...

"We have to hurry." She squeezes Dean's hand and tries to stand up but her knees are still shaking.

"You can barely stand..."

"I'm fine." She reaches for her gun and stands up straigt. Lila Dawson was not weak – she never had been. And even though everything was still spinning she had to stop her vision from happening.

It seems like they walk forever, and just when they think that they can't walk anymore they come to a clearing. It starts to rain and Lila steps out ahead of them, trying to see if she can see Sam. The rain makes it hard to see anything...

They walk further, and Dean breaks away from them, flashlight out in front of him as if he thinks it will protect him.

"Sam!" He yells.

Lila sees him then, he's holding his arm as if he's hurt and he staggers towards them. "Dean!" He yells in relief.

And she really thinks for half a second that everything might be okay...

But when have they ever gotten a happy ending?

"Sam, look out!" Dean yells, sprinting off towards them.

Too late.

Super Soldier stabs the knife right through Sam's back. Dean takes off running for them.

"Noooo!" He yells, his voice cracking with pain.

He twists the knife, creating a massive wound, before running away. Sam, gasping, falls to his knees. While Bobby chases after the guy, Dean slides to the ground in front of Sam. He grabs at Sam's clothing, trying to keep him conscious.

Lila, frozen in shock and fear and self loathing sinks into the mud at her feet, wishing it would swallow her up like it did in her vision.

"No, Sam..." Dean almost whispers, looking at his little brother with tear filled eyes.

Sam's head falls forward onto Dean's shoulder.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, Sam. Sam! Hey! Hey, hey. Come here. Let me look at you." He places his hand on the wound on Sam's back, covering his entire palm in blood.

"Hey, look at me. It's not even that bad. It's not even that bad, all right? Sammy? Sam!" Sam's head starts wobbling. "Hey, listen to me." Dean says desperately, the tears in his voice make her heart hurt. "We're gonna patch you up, okay? You'll be good as new. Huh? I'm gonna take care of you. I'm gonna take you care of you. I've got you. That's my job, right? Watch out for my pain-in-the-ass little brother?" Dean touches his brother's face. "Sam? Sam! Sam! Sammy!"

Sam's eyes slide shut, and his entire body goes limp, falling against his brother.

"No. No, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, God. Oh, God." With tears streaming down his face, he rocks his brother in his arms as he dies.

Lila raises up off the ground then, unable to watch it anymore, and she pukes into the mud. Last time she watched someone die, she promised herself she would never do it again, at least not someone she loved.

Not Sam, not him. He didn't deserve to go out this way.

"Sam!" Dean screams into the rain and the darkness.

They moved him into a cabin, Dean wouldn't let anyone help him carry him. He cradled him like he was a baby and sit him down on the old mattress. Lila stuck back in the corner, watching with a lump in her throat.

All she was thinking was how was he ever going to move on from this?

How could Dean Winchester ever get over losing his brother? The one person he truly loved in this world.

And she was balming herself, because she saw this happen, she could have done something to stop it. She just feels like the walls are closing in on her and she can't fucking breathe in the small room with Sam's dead body and Dean who just seems to be in some kind of trance.

"I have to get some air." But he doesn't even acknowledge her, he's just staring at Sam's body with a blank stare.

Denial.

He did not want to believe that what he was seeing was real, his brother wasn't dead, his life wasn't crumbling around him.

She was thinking those same thoughts as she made her way out into the stale air. The smell of stagnate water was almost choking her.

This town didn't seem so haunted to her, it just seemed sad, lonely and cold.

And she had never wanted to leave a place so badly.

Bobby had left not long after they brought Sam inside out of the rain. Once the sun came up he said he was going to find a way to get a car to them. What he didn't say was so they couldn't have to carry Sam's body through the woods, he didn't say it because Dean hadn't spoken a word and both of them knew that mentionig the elephant in the room might set him off.

He was never going to be the same, she knew this with her whole heart. But she promised him that no matter what happened that she wouldn't leave and she meant it, she meant it with everything inside her.

She falls asleep with her head in her hands at the kitchen table because she is fucking tired and she hasn't really slept in days. Waking up only when Bobby comes in the door and the smell of chicken fills the room. Then she realizes she is starving.

"I brought yall food." He says, sitting the bucket down in front of her. He also sits a bag down filled with waters and soda.

"No booze?"

He eyes her, but hands her the flask from his jacket. "Has he whispers even moved?" He, looking towards the room.

She shrugs, looking into the bucket of chicken and losing her apetite. She takes another swig from the flask and hands it back. "I fell asleep, I'm not even sure how long I was out."

"About six hours," Dean says suddenly, appearing in the doorway.

"I brought you some grub." Bobby says is a soft voice.

"I'm fine,"

"You should try and eat something."

"I said I'm fine." He snaps, taking a swig from a flask.

Lila stnads up from the chair and takes a deep breath. It was pretty much now or never. "Dean... I hate to bring this up. But don't you think maybe it's time... we bury Sam?"

"No." He deadpans her, looking away.

"We could..." He sighs, searching for the words. "maybe..."

"What?" He asks calmly, too calmly. "Torch his corpse? Not yet."

"I want you to come with me." Bobby tells him, sounding more afraid than she has ever heard him sound before.

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Dean, please."

"Would you cut me some slack?" He says, almost begging.

Lila steps towards him, why did she feel as if she was approaching a wounded animal? "We're just trying to help you..."

Dean snorts, and she can't help but get a little anfry from the look he is giving her.

"Something big is going down – end-of-the world big."

"Well, then let it end." He yells, making her take a step back.

Anger.

"You don't mean that." Bobby says, sounded wounded himself.

Dean closes the distance between them, getting into Bobby's face. "You don't think so? Huh? You don't think I've given enough? You don't think I've paid enough? I'm done with it. All of it. And if you know what's good for you, you'd turn around, and get the hell out of here."

Bobby stands there, shaking his head.

Dean shoves Bobby suddenly, "Go!" He yells and Lila gasps, pulling Dean away from him, and gets thrown into the table in the tousle. He stops suddenly, and his entire body seems to drain of energy. He turns to her with a contrite expression. "I'm sorry." Then he looks at Bobby. "Please just go, and take her with you."

Her heart sinks in her chest.

Bobby looks at her, sighing "Let's go Lila."

"No matter what huh?" She shoves him this time, anger boiling voer inside herself. How could he always just push her away so easily? "You made me promise you that I wouldn't leave you."

"You shouldn't be here." He says, "I'm no good to be around right now."

"I can't do you the way you did me..."

His eyes fill with tears, looking at her hurt him so much. She was the girl that he loved, but right now all he wanted to do was put a gun in his mouth and pull the trigger and he didn't want her around to see it.

"I will frag you out of here myself." He says, looking at her with hard eyes.

She squares her jaw and looks up at him. "Do it then."

Bobby clears his throat, touching Lila's arm softly. "Let's go."

She looks back at him, and in that moment she hated him. Hated that she wasn't enough and that she never would be. "Fuck you Dean Winchester."

He looks down at the floor.

"You're a fucking coward." She knocks over a few chairs on her way out just because she's pissed and she wants to fucking destroy something.

"You know where we'll be." He turns his back on Dean and leaves the room. Dean swallows hard, and looks at Sam's body; a tear falls from his eye.

"You know, when we were little— and you couldn't been more than five— you just started asking questions. How come we didn't have a mom? Why do we always have to move around? Where'd Dad go when he'd take off for days at a time? I remember I begged you, Quit asking, Sammy. Man, you don't want to know." Dean wipes the tears from his eyes. "I just wanted you to be a kid... Just for a little while longer. I always tried to protect you... Keep you safe... Dad didn't even have to tell me. It was just always my responsibility, you know? It's like I had one job... I had one job...
And I screwed it up." His voice cracks "I blew it. And for that, I'm sorry. He wipes tears from his face again.
"I guess that's what I do. I let down the people I love. I let Dad down. I let Lila down. And now I guess I'm just supposed to let you down, too." He shakes his head, tears streaming down is face unontrollably. "How can I? How am I supposed to live with that?" He looks down at his hands, and he thinks about that gun tucked in his jacket pocket and he thinking about how easy it would be to just die with his brother. What a poetic way to go out...
Dean's sobbing, looking at his baby brother. "What am I supposed to do? Sammy. God. What am I supposed to do?" He inhales sharply. "What am I supposed to do?" He yells, angry and pissed and just fucking sad. Because it has really come down to this...

And all he knows is he can't put a bullet in his own head, he isn't a coward, not like that.

So he jumps up, knocking over the chair he was sitting in and he takes off, running towards his car as fast as he can.

He had a plan, a plan that was going to fix everything...

Lila tilts a fifth of whiskey up and lets the warm liquid lide down her throat. She gulps until she can't feel her throat. Someone, Del, knocks on the stall door and yells her name.

"Lila Jane Dawson I know you're in there!"

Fuck. She screws the lid back on the bottle and tucks it into her back pocket. "I'm on my period..."

"Try again little girl."

Lila unlocks the door and Del pushes her way in.

"You let that stupid boy get in your head again."

She shakes her head. "He never left it."

"Dear lord you're wasted. How the hell do you expect me to let you work like this?"
"I'm drunk here all the time."

Del sighs. "Would you look at yourself honey?"

She shakes her head, "If you're not letting me work then i'm leaving. I don't need a fucking lecture right now Del, not after everything that happened."

Her face softens. "You know I am sorry about Sam, but people die everyday my dear, you of all people..."

"I can't talk about this." She snaps, stepping back away from her. "I can't fucking deal."

"Take the week off, get it out of your system and be back here monday."

Lila nods and pushes past her. She knows Del is just trying to help her, but she doesn't want any help. She wants to drink herself into an oblivion.

She tosses her apron over the counter and makes her way out of the bar, knocking into someone on her way out. She can't really explain it but she's overcome with the sudden feeling that something bad is about to happen...

She thinks as she starts her car up and pulls out of the gravel parking lot that nothing else worse could happen.