Okay, so people know this fic is an AU, and many things are either head cannon or might break some rules within Re:Zero but the characters/elements are consistent with the story.

Also, just so people are aware because this chapter might make it seem like I'm doing an evil Flugul, so just note that none of the main antagonists for this fic are evil. I won't say much more, but note that if you think it's an evil Flugul fic.

Subaru's name getting eaten makes sense because I don't think rewriting memories would be enough. Od Laguna would rewrite memories and teleport people to where they're supposed to be. It makes the most sense to me, so I don't see why it wouldn't be the case.

Subaru was within the Taygeta library. He finds a book titled by the name of Flugel. Subaru was curious about who this man was, as Shaula referred to him as Flugel. He decided to open the book and, to do so, saw the truth of the Great Calamity. After viewing Flugel's entire life, Subaru's mind begins to be overwhelmed with despair and worry.

This… no. I can't let this happen. Is the cycle almost ending? Emilia, I can't let her have the same fate. Why did Flugel do this? To be called a Sage after what he started… what do I do? How can I stop this? There has to be a way… there has to be a way. If I read Reid's book, maybe that will give me more information. The name of the Sage… it's a curse. I am no Sage candidate. I do not wish to be the same title as that man.

Satella… why did you have to suffer? Why did Emilia have to suffer? Why was Flugel responsible for everything? He's regarded as a hero but as nothing more than a fraud. He created the disaster of the Great Calamity. Satella has been within that seal battling for control of her mind because Flugel wanted to try to alter an authority. Did he want to replicate it? Why will Emilia have to be the next… why do I not have time? I need to learn a way to stop this from happening. I am useless. I'm a curse. Why did Emilia have to meet me? She's going to suffer as
Satella has… and I can't help either of them.

I am nothing more than a burden. I will cause the next calamity, which has already started. How can I fix this? Return by death can't fix this… Emilia will never free the elves or become the King, and it's all because of me.

Subaru began to shed tears as he walked towards Reid's book and opened it. However, when he did, he was moved into an unknown location. Before he could even regard his surroundings, his name was eaten. However, at this very moment, he was suddenly teleported outside the Pleiades Watchtower. Louis ate Subaru's name, resulting in Od Laguna rearranging history to account for this change. But Subaru Natski's existence could not be erased by only changing memories. The entire world was altered as Od Laguna had to correct both locations and memories. Reality itself was rewritten as the effects of Subaru being forgotten required the entire world to be altered to support a world that Subaru Natsuki never existed in.

Subaru's body felt different. His authorities altered. He wasn't sure how, but he could feel that something was different with his In Invisible Providence and Cor Leonis. He used Cor Leonis and could sense negative emotions. He could see underneath the Watchtower a large number of negative emotions. It looked almost like a purple aura that he could see. He then used Invisible Providence, but he no longer formed a hand. He saw purple strings around his body.

What happened? Where is everyone? Why am I outside the tower? How did I get here? Why do I not sense Beatrice's contract anymore… what could've done this? When I saw that color, I felt so many negative emotions. It was underneath the watchtower… where Satella is sealed. My witch factors altered… do I not have return by death either?

I opened the book of the dead of Reid and vaguely saw a person before everything changed. Is there even a power that can do that? The only explanation I can think of is gluttony. If my name was eaten, then… when other's names were eaten, people's memories altered to account for the difference. But if I were to do trials and… did reality change to account for it? Why am I thinking like this? After seeing everything that happened, I don't know how to feel… my authority's abilities changed, I may not have return by death, and I know what is coming. I can't let Emilia die. If I lost my return by death or it altered… I need someone.

Subaru walked towards the tower in hopes that Shaula could help him. As he approached the entrance, his sloth witch factor activated independently. Subaru watched as the purple strings resembling the Invisible Providence's color went down toward the ground underneath the Pleiades Watchtower.

What is going on? Why did my authority even activate? Why is it going towards where Satella is sealed? Is this it? Am I causing another Great Calamity to happen?

Subaru's Cor Leonis activated as he saw a much larger color than before. He could feel an immense amount of negative feelings and emotions. He watched as the thread-like strings returned to him, and he could sense the source of the negative emotions getting closer. After a few moments, he watched as Satella approached him with a purple aura around her that blocked her face from being seen.

Looking at her, I feel more despair than I thought was even possible to experience. Why did this have to happen? Why will this have to happen to Emilia? Can I do anything in this world other than harm the people I care about?

Subaru begins to watch as the aura surrounding Satella moves toward him. He could see the negative feelings as a color. Subaru wondered if Cor Leonis was absorbing Satella's feelings. As the moments passed, the amount of negative emotion he could make both senses and see initially dissipated as he watched the colors retreat to him. He expected his mind was about to break if he was using Cor Leonis to share the burden of negative feelings, but nothing happened. He stared at Satella as he saw her eyes widen. He wanted to speak, but he didn't know what to say. After seeing what happened, he couldn't think of anything to help someone consumed by Flugul's sin for four hundred years.

Satella walked toward the silent Subaru, unaware of what had just happened. She remembered seeing purple-like strings touch her shoulder, and she began to lose control. The next thing she saw was Subaru in front of her. She didn't know what to say to him. But she also felt a sense of relief she hadn't felt for so long that she forgot what it was. Her envy, despair, and sadness controlled her. She felt drained from her body. The sensation was comparable to someone healing you. She walked towards Subaru to say the only thing she could say.

"Thank you."

Subaru's body stiffened but not out of fear but remorse. He still couldn't believe he was in front of Satella, but after learning everything that had happened, he felt he had known her for years. It was an odd sensation, as if you watched a demon's life and then met the person they cursed.

"Satella… I'm sorry for what happened to you."

Satella blinked, "Subaru, how did you do that?"

Subaru thought of a response, but he didn't know how he did it. He could only assume that after reading Flugul's book of the dead, his authorities altered or manifested into his desire. But before, his powers were not near the same as the Sin Archbishops. He only knew that he had the power to either absorb or consume negative emotions, and he had no idea what his Invisible Providence morphed into. More importantly, he had no idea if he could return by death or what would happen if he asked her. But he felt trusting towards Satella after seeing what happened. He knew who she was.

Subaru prepared himself for pain, "Satella can I return by death still?"

Subaru waited for the usual excruciating pain whenever he said those words to anyone, but nothing happened. He wasn't sure whether that was good or bad, as if he lost his ability to return by death, he only had one shot to save Emilia… and even Satella from becoming calamities.

"Subaru, I don't know what happened. I was barely in control, and whenever I lost control, my memories go blank." her tone turned shallow, "All I could do was watch you die… yet you let me feel something I had forgotten."

Why is she blaming herself? Does she even know what he did? Should I even tell her? What do I even do now? If the reality itself altered to adjust for me not existing, is Emilia even alive? Is she still in Elior Forest… alone. Wait… if reality altered then I might have time to stop it from the beginning. I am in the middle of nowhere with Satella. What am I supposed to do? I'd usually hate myself, but all I think of is what that 'Sage' did.

Subaru stared into Satella's amethyst eyes. He felt conflicted as he now knew the connection between Emilia and Satella. He tried to think of what to do next but couldn't exactly go back to the Capital with her… nor did he want to abandon her as he did. Emilia and everyone he spent the last few years with have forgotten his existence… and that was the only way he could save them. The idea of gluttony giving him a second chance to prevent both who he cared for, and this world's destruction was so hard to believe Subaru began to wonder if he was even sane anymore.

Subaru walked towards Satella, not feeling any negative emotions from her. He could sense positive emotions as well. When he used Cor Leonis, the dark aura he could see earlier was now a bright yellow. He could feel the emotions, too, but it only brought him sorrow. A person who was so pure being turned into a disaster out of the desire to gain her power was a worse sensation than getting killed. But thinking about how he felt or about him would only lead to what happened before. This is his second chance. Even if he's forgotten, he will still love Emilia and do everything he can to protect her from what would've come.

He knew from Flugul's memories that authorities function to the user's desires and another variable that Flugul couldn't discern. He remembered his first day and his desire to save Emilia… return by death. Was that how it happened? Then what did it manifest into now?

Satella was waiting for a response as she looked around the area seeing the giant tower and the sand surrounding them. She looked at Subaru's face, which looked both distraught and confused. She wanted to help the person that helped her. She walked up to Subaru and placed her hand on his shoulder, using a yang spell to ease his mind.

Subaru was snapped out of thoughts by a sense of relief. He then realized Satella was right before him and saw her arm glowing, resting on his shoulder. Subaru then remembered that Satella's authority was unique because it manipulated mana and allowed her to use magic at its highest form. She was not a genius, unlike Roswaal, but she was the ability to use the most advanced magic he could see from both Flugul and his memories. He thought about Roswaal and his Tome of Wisdom. If he had never planned for his arrival in this world, would he still go to Elior Forest? He assumed the dragon candidates would remain the same as he did not influence that, and the Royal family would've died. If Emilia was a candidate, the question is only if Roswaal would find her or not… or she'd still be stuck in that forest alone all these years. He needed to ease his mind. He thought of everything simultaneously, which he couldn't confirm or deny. First, he needed to make a plan for what to do next.

"Satella my name was eaten by gluttony. As a result, I believe that my existence could not be changed by memory alterations alone. The only solution would be for Od Laguna to rewrite everyone's memories and reality."

Satella tilted her head, "You sound sort of like Flugul."

Subaru's teeth gritted after hearing that. But when he thought about what he was speaking or even thinking… he knew more knowledge, and as an effect, his speech may have changed. The idea of sounding like that man was sickening, but the knowledge was at least helpful. He needed to know as much as he could, especially if he lost his ability to return by death. He wanted to tell Satella what Flugul did, but he wasn't sure if that would only hurt her more.

Subaru responded, "Please do not compare me or… say that name. But did you understand what I said before?"

Satella was confused by Subaru's response, but she wouldn't ask why he asked. She felt like she wouldn't want to know if she did. Her memory was hazy still, and she only knew bits and pieces of her past and Subaru.
Satella nodded, "Subaru, what do you want to do… I never thought I'd get to meet you in person. It's been so long since I've done anything but sit in that container… trying to resist something, but I don't know what it was. I don't know how I even know you."

Does she not know? This is even worse than my situation… she's hated by the entire world and doesn't remember or know what she did. That fucking piece of shit… I have to tell her, right? We can't just walk around anywhere. We're lucky we're in the Sand Dunes, or else she'd be… this situation is worse than tragic. I don't know what word would describe it. Where can we even go? Can she disguise herself and her miasma?

Subaru stared at the color radiating from Satella. He wasn't sure if his Cor Leonis was active or what was happening. He needed to get used to the changes in his authorities. He needs to figure out where Satella can go without being killed or causing another calamity. The only person I can think of who would not care about Satella is Roswaal assuming she is helpful in his goal. But confronting Roswaal would also help me determine if Emilia is still in Elior Forest. I never thought I'd be at the point where Roswaal was my best option…

Subaru sighed, "Satella, there's a lot of things that you don't know that you did. Also, I am forgotten by everyone except you. We also need to prevent many things from happening… so we will go to someone I know who wouldn't care if your Satella."

Satella's confusion grew more. She feared what Subaru might be hiding, but she could tell Subaru did not fear her. She didn't know why he would… her memories were hazy, just bits and pieces of her life. She remembered Flugul and Reid and the things that happened, but ever since Flugul told her he had a new idea to help her use her authority to help the world, everything after was blank. She wanted to help but didn't know what Subaru wanted her to do… and she wanted to know what happened to him and herself.

Satella asked, "Uh, Subaru… I know a large amount of time has passed since I was able to see you… I only saw you a few times, but I will if I can help you in any way. But… is there something I did? Wha-t did I do?"

Subaru watched Satella's expression go from a warm smile to a scared and unknowing face. He understood he had had the same face before after dying, and not knowing why or what happened, the resemblance was oddly similar. As they stood in the desert, Subaru wanted to tell her in a more… relaxing environment. But any town or city they went to would cause issues. He also had to figure out how to get to Roswaal's mansion or know what his Tome told him to do. Subaru's hope slowly faded as he could only picture Emilia in the forest… alone.

Satella could tell Subaru was hiding something, but she assumed it was for a good reason. She wanted to comfort Subaru as he looked like a man trying to solve countless issues. She remembered how Flugul would look, but there was a distinct difference. Flugul would laugh or be excited at challenges, while Subaru was more worried and confused. She was confused herself, but she wanted to help him if she could. If her presence was a problem for him, she needed to know.

"Subaru, if me being here with you is a problem, I can leave… I just wanted to help if I could."

Subaru's body flinched at the question. He felt so bad he couldn't even think of something to say. Satella cursed to be a monster and forget the actions that they did… it was beyond any words or concepts Subaru could think of to compare. He would not abandon Satella or be no different from the 'Sage.'

Subaru responded, "Satella, you are not a problem for me. I won't tell you everything, but it's a long story. We need to find somewhere safe for now. Just assume that your appearance will make people dislike you. But I don't dislike you I… care for you. There is only one location I know of that has the possibility of being somewhere we can go unless you know of any places. We need a house or somewhere to stay."

Satella eyes glowed, "Is that it? Subaru is my authority or power. Flugul called it authority… but it allows me to manipulate mana. I think I could create a house, but I don't know what kind of house you'd want me to make. Also, your gate is broken…."

How did I forget about that? Wait, how did my gate get broken if the events never happened… wait for no if reality altered for everyone other than me except I got teleported to the bottom of the tower. Perhaps it has to do with the trials? But if my gate is broken… Satella probably will need to fix it or do what Beatrice did.

Satella put her hand on Subaru's chest. By doing so, it both restored his gate and improved it. He now has higher mana reserves. Subaru looked down at hand and then back up to Satella's smile.

"Your gate… I fixed it. But where do you want to go?"

Subaru felt something change in his body. Assuming that Satella was fixing his gate, he could feel it. It felt like a warmth that went beyond human touch. Like a warmth to Subaru's soul. Subaru wondered if Satella could fly like Roswaal and, if so… if she could carry him.

Subaru smiled, "Thank you. Satella, can you use magic to fly? And if so… can you carry me so we can leave this place and go somewhere better to make a house."

Satella thought about the question. She had never tried to fly before but assumed it wouldn't be too hard. She focused on mana and combined various elements until she began to float. She then tried doing the same to Subaru by manipulating the mana around him, but it didn't work. She would need to focus on manipulating two complex spells simultaneously, which she could not do.

Satella covered her face with her hands, "Sorry, Subaru, I can't make you fly, but I can fly and… I can carry you."

Seeing the 'Witch of Envy, Satella.' act in such a way made Subaru laugh. He had no time for pride or embarrassment about Satella carrying him. He was more interested in how she would create the house.

"Satella, it's fine. I'm surprised you learned it so quickly. There's only one other person I know that can fly. Let's ascend very high, so I can get a good view of where we can go. Sound good?"

Satella nodded and picked Subaru up, and flew up into the sky until Subaru said it was high enough. From a distance, he could see a forest to the south that was close to the Astrea mansion and a forest near the sanctuary. Subaru decided to go with the sanctuary and then have Satella make a small house to discuss everything and see if Roswaal's goal still involves him.

Wait, how did I know that mansion from that far away was the Astrea mansion? Not Flugul nor myself would know from this distance… sloth and greed already showed what they manifested into, so unless I just forget something, maybe my envy factor changed into some sort of information gatherer? I'll figure it out later… I hope Emilia is safe.

Subaru pointed in a direction towards the forest near the Sanctuary. Satella flew far faster than Subaru saw Roswaal fly. Within a few minutes, they arrived and landed on the outskirts of the forest. Subaru was amazed and slightly embarrassed, but it saved a lot of time.

Subaru asked, "Satella created a small house that's not giant like the mansions we saw. Like a small one or two rooms… tomorrow we'll go to get food, but tonight I'll explain as much as possible."

Satella nodded and began to manipulate mana to create a wood foundation, creating every element required within a house. Subaru watched dumbfounded as Satella constructed a house with a door, roof, and small details like windows. He wondered what the interior would look like.

Satella turned to Subaru, "Do you like it?"

Subaru laughed, "Yes, I do. What is the interior like?"

Satella hummed, "Well, I do have some memories of you… I still don't understand how, but I copied the interior of some mansion I saw you were in a few times."

Satella is… very nice. This is going to be tough conservation. How do I even tell her that she destroyed half the world? She'd get so sad… not to mention I don't know what triggers her authority to go crazy, but I think I can nullify it with my authority. I've avoided thinking about it, but I still miss Emilia. She won't remember me, and I don't think she can… the selfishness of Flugul was the reason the calamity began. The selfish intent or desire that he had. The opposite would be the solution… which is never getting to tal~k to her agai~n….

Subaru felt a hand on his shoulder, "Subaru tell me what's hurting you… please, if I can help, I will."

"Let's just go inside."

Subaru walked into the house that Satella made, a replica of Roswaal's mansion. Only instead had a minimal version of his kitchen, a room, a bathroom, and a living space. Subaru was impressed but dreading the conservation that was about to unfold.

Subaru directed Satella to sit down next to him on the couch within the living space. It was a nice comfortable couch which made Subaru question how Satella managed to create cotton from magic. The two sat beside each other as Subaru began to muster the courage to speak about everything.

"Satella, let me start by saying you are not a bad person. No matter what you think, from what I'm about to say none of was your fault. You're a good person, better than good. You were someone that cared for me even though you didn't know anything about me… Satella, your memories faded due to Flugul attempting to recreate your authority to use for himself. As a result, it slowly morphed your authority into that of what the world refers to as… Witch of Envy."

Satella's body stiffened at the words Subaru was saying. She didn't like where what Subaru was explaining was going… she remembered what Subaru said about Flugul, but her memory of what he said was different. She never thought Flugul was terrible, just smart and intelligent. She didn't know if Subaru was lying but knew that idea was an excuse to deny what she was being told.

Subaru saw the effect his words had on Satella. Not knowing a crime you committed while being manipulated into doing so is not the best thing to find out, to put it lightly. Subaru needed to do something… Satella was locked in a containment for four hundred years, haunted by a thing that controlled her, and she wouldn't even remember it.

Subaru loved Emilia, but in this situation, showing affection to Satella was the right thing to do. Subaru put his arm around Satella's neck, trying to comfort her as he continued.

"The thing that controlled you… devoured of the world. That is why we couldn't be seen because everyone blamed and hated us. I would rather be honest right now than you find out in a worse way. But… none of what you did was your fault. I promise you that, and I… will care and…."

Subaru didn't know if they could say it. He loved Emilia. He knew he only loved Emilia. He wouldn't lie to Satella just as Flugul did. He would be honest and tell her how he felt and the truth. That is the difference between himself and that man. Even if Emilia never remembers him, he'll still love her. He'll prevent her from dying even if she never speaks to him again… even if she finds another man, he will be happy for her.

Satella was still processing everything she was told. The idea of her… killing half of the people in the world made her want to die. She didn't want to do that or harm anyone. Even if she was controlled or manipulated, she still did it. She deserved to die.

"Subaru, can you please kill me."

Subaru was snapped out of thought, looking at Satella, who was shedding tears and her trembling. Her entire body was tensed up, and her eyes looked dead. Subaru could sense not the same thing as when he first saw her. He sensed thoughts of self-hatred, suicide, and wanting to die. He's felt the same, but Satella didn't deserve it. All of this was a nightmare all started by that man.

Subaru wiped the tears off Satella's face, "Satella, please don't say that. I've felt the same so many times but you… you didn't do anything wrong. You were used."

"Just kill me. Even if I was used… I still did it."

Subaru couldn't see this. His resentment for Flugul grew more and more. Satella didn't deserve to die. Flugul was already dead. Subaru needed Sattella's help to… wait, does she not remember?

Subaru asked, "Satella do you remember having a little sister?"

"No. I never had one. Please kill me… I should just go back to that seal."

Did she forget? Wait, unless… that fucking piece of shit. I get it now. Not only did he affect Satella, but somehow he affected her memories of her sister… but why?

Satella was sitting on the couch with tears covering her black dress. Her body trembled, and she dug her nails into her skin. Subaru grabbed her hands and made eye contact.

"If you die, I'm as good as dead too. You had a sister, but somehow he made you forget her. She will die too. If you don't live for yourself, live for me. It's selfish, I know, I'm not a good person, but I'm honest. I need you, and if you die… Satella, whatever sins you think you committed, I'll take the burden. But please stop doing this. The world has forgotten me, and you don't remember what you did or who made you into what you became." Subaru continued, "If you die now, you're taking the easy way out. You have the power and can help me ensure the world's safety. Something is coming… I don't know if I can say, but please."

Subaru looked into Satella's eyes and still saw nothing. She needed something, but what? She was isolated for four hundred years, so… if saving you, Emilia, requires me to love Satella, then I will. Emilia, if you can hear my thoughts or some god-listening, please tell her I love her.

Subaru adjusted his body and pulled Satella closer to him, "Satella, I love you. We have many things in common: both lost souls in a life of misery. But we can change that and repent for what we've done. If we don't, and you or I die, this world will suffer due to our inaction."

Satella heard the words 'I love you.' It felt… genuine. It was different than the small fabrics of her memory that she was told by someone she had forgotten. She had a sister too that she didn't even know about, and she was alive? Satella's mind was still filled with sadness. She finally was free, and Subaru saved her, and now she was the cause of so much suffering. But Subaru was right. If she just died, she'd be giving up on at least doing some good for all the evil shit committed. That was enough to continue to live, at least.

Subaru wiped off the tears from Satella's face, and she stopped crying. Subaru has never really had such a parallel with someone like this. Satella blamed herself for everything, wanted to die, and hated herself. Subaru felt the same and still does, but his purpose of continuing gives him a reason to keep living. He might even be able to die, something he craved before, but now he saw what that looked like. He saw his reaction to the words he'd say. He was a hypocrite.

"Satella, life doesn't have to be miserable. When we first met in the Sand Dunes, you were so bright. Please don't lose that. I am not strong. I need someone that can be there for me too. Nobody in this world exists outside of you who remembers me. Even if you have to fake it… I know myself and will break and need someone to help me. You are the only hope I have now."

Satella thought about what Subaru had said. She was happy just a few hours ago and now wanted to die. But… if she can't be there for Subaru like he was to her, he'll break. The person that loved her. She would be there for him too. She will help him and repent for her sins. She doesn't deserve nor want happiness, but she'll at least try to help Subaru find love. She didn't deserve his love.

"Alright, Subaru, I'll try. I'm sorry you had to say that for me."

"Someone once told me it's better to say thank you than sorry."

"Subaru, thank you."