Slight murderous!Hermione in this one. I was tempted to make Hermione really mad and to kill someone in this chapter but i feel like this fic is more of a fluff fic so she doesnt quite kill anyone.
Reviews encouraged.
"Bloody hell... who is knocking on your door this early?" Hermione groaned as Minerva rolled out from under her the next morning.
"I reckon I could guess." Minerva was way too hung over, much like Hermione.
Hermione was just drifting back off when Fleur and Minerva came back into the room. Minerva was looking miserable and Fleur apprehensive. Hermione noticed the paper in the French witches hands and frowned before she heaved a deep sigh. Slowly she sat up and held her hand out, Fleur hesitated for only a moment before handing over the news paper.
Golden Girl or Just Another One of the Boys?
Rita Skeeter
Our reliable sources report a new tid bit of information on the Brains of the Golden Trio. Although unconfirmed it has been heard that Hermione Granger may have more in common with the boys she became such good friends with. The truth lies in the 'girls' pants as it were-
Hermione didn't read any more. Instead the news paper burst into flames in her hands and when it was nothing but ash the young witch rolled out of bed and pulled her jeans on. Minerva and Fleur watched quietly wondering what was about to happen. Before either witch could opened their mouths to ask Hermione picked up her wand and turned to the two.
"I apologise. I love you both but I may end up in Azkaban after today, because i'm going to bloody kill her." Hermione stated.
"Oh please no. Wait until after the third date..." Minerva whined but otherwise didn't move to stop the witch.
"Hussy." Hermione retorted as she stepped past the two pyjama clad witches.
"Ok wait wait! Hermione, stop. Just wait until i'm dressed, Fleur you can teach Hermione's classes before lunch right?" Minerva asked and the French witch nodded.
"Hurry. I want to see her innards spread beneath my boot." Hermione relented willing to wait for Minerva. Fleur gave the young witch a reassuring hug and then left. Once Minerva was dressed the two Flooed directly to the Ministry.
It was early, but it was also Monday so the Ministry was already teeming with employee's. As early as it was the Daily Prophet had been printed but only given out to those at the Ministry all other copies were currently in transit. So when Minerva McGonagall stepped out of the fire with a furious Hermione Granger at her side, those present wanted to vacate immediately. They had all read the article, it had been on the front page after all.
It was while Hermione was searching the floo entrance hall that she noticed decidedly familiar blonde hair with a gaudy little head piece holding it in a bun. Hermione's eyes narrowed and before anyone knew what was going on the witch became the small Caracal. Minerva had no chance of stopping her as Hermione bolted right for the reporter who turned as the sea of people parted for the young professor. Minerva's only chance was to become the silver tabby and chase after her.
By the time Rita realised she was potentially about to be mauled it was too late. She turned and let out a shrill scream a moment before the caracal ploughed into her taking her down to the ground. With a snarl the caracal became Hermione again and the brunette stood over the blonde witch with her wand drawn and pointed directly at Rita's face. The masses were shocked and curious, they all knew who Hermione was and obviously Rita didn't have many fans so no one was willing to step in unless things got considerably more serious.
"How dare you!" Hermione fair screeched at the highly distressed woman.
"How dare I what Miss- Mr? Granger?" Hermione would hand it too her, Rita had pluck considering her current position.
"You bloody cow." Hermione hissed and was about to flourish her wand and cast a spell when a tabby cat leaped out of no where and snatched the wand from her fingers.
Hermione dropped her hand and cast a frustrated glare at the woman now standing beside. Minerva looked apologetic but there was no way that she was going to let Hermione hex a woman with so many witnesses. Of course Rita seemed to think that meant she had been saved as she slid out from under the angry brunette and stood up dusting herself off. Before she got to leave she was accosted by Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley who took her wand and flanked her not letting her leave as Kingsley stepped into the circle.
"When Percy told me I should be aware that you could show up, Hermione, I honestly had no idea what he meant. Then he showed me the Prophet and I had him send the article right to Fleur. I have to apologise, I cannot recall the papers that have been sent out already. I will have to three of you come up to my office. Harry, Ron, bring Rita." Kingsley spoke formally and turned. The witches and wizards followed as the crowed grumbled before dispersing. Wisely Minerva didn't return her witches wand to her.
The entire elevator trip up to the Minister's office was a silent one, Hermione glared daggers at the back on Rita's head and squeezed Minerva's hand when the older woman offered it to her. The ride seemed to be taking far too long and foolishly Ronald decided it was time to speak up. Of course it was a good chance for him to make a fool of himself.
"You know 'Mione, you didn't have to lie about dating McGonagall, you could have just told us you have a... a you know." Ronald spoke up in a hushed tone, pointless as that as considering the compartment was small and everyone could hear him.
"Ron, you remember 3rd year when we were going to see Hagrid and Witherwings? You remember Draco and his sidekicks showed up?" Hermione asked in a quiet tone.
"Yeah. You socked him in the nose." Ron laughed remembering the day fondly. Hermione rounded on him.
"If you open your mouth again about my dick or my girlfriend i'm going to do a hell of a lot more than just punch you in the nose." Hermione ground out and Ron paled and nodded, he looked like he might cry.
Minerva gently pulled the witch back beside her and looked at her reassuringly. Ron stood as far from Hermione as he could and didn't look up from him shoes until the elevator had stopped. Kingsley looked at Hermione with a grin as did Harry and the report glared at the doors of the elevator. When they opened the 5 of them walked along a hall that wasn't too long, there was a single door to the right which had Percy's name on it and one in front which had Kingsley's.
Once in the office Kingsley offered Minerva a seat who took and was a little surprised with a very pouty Hermione sat down in her lap. A second seat was summoned for Rita and the boys were asked to stand outside before Kingsley took his own seat. Hermione glared at the blonde witch who looked anywhere but at the little hell cat perched in the Headmistress' lap. The fact Minerva allowed that was surprising enough but no one commented on it. Now obviously wasn't the time.
"Rita, I thought I told you that all final draughts had to be sent to myself or my assistant before going to final print. What have you got to say for yourself?" Kingsley asked in his rich deep voice, ever the face of calm.
"Come on, Minister. You would never have let me print that. The world needed to know that Granger is a liar." Rita waved her hands in a flippant manner, it was obvious that she didn't care one bit for what she had done.
"What prey tell is the lie?" Minerva snarked from her seat, her arm was snaked around Hermione's hips.
"That she is a she obviously." Rita rolled her eyes at the Headmistress.
"Have some respect!" Hermione barked from her seat. She wanted to rip Rita's head off and put it where the sun doesn't shine.
"Respect a Headmistress who wants to use her power over a colleague to shag... it?" Rita laughed and Hermione launched herself at the woman. Luckily Minerva's reflexes were quick and she managed to get her arms around Hermione.
"Minerva has never, not once, taken advantage of her power over me in regards to my occupation nor did she as my Professor. I will not have you attempt to drag her through the dirt when she has done nothing wrong. She certainly has not shagged me." Hermione grit out looking from Rita to Kingsley.
"Then how does she know about the snake in your pants?" Rita sneered and Hermione's eyes narrowed.
"Because we have agreed to try for a romantic relationship and I trust her enough to tell her about my anatomy before things got serious. She has known since the start of this thing." Hermione explained though really she didn't need to.
"The French witch?" Rita inquired smugly.
"During the war I was apprehended by Snatchers and taken to Malfoy Manor were I was tortured by Bellatrix Lestrange. Afterward I was taken to Shell Cottage where Fleur spent many weeks healing me. It was hard to wear clothes so she had undressed me." Hermione had her arms folded over her chest and a scowl on her face.
"Thank you Hermione. You did not need to answer her questions. What do you want to do now?" Kingsley asked looking at the brunette.
"She needs to be punished." Minerva speaks up and Rita gasps.
"On what grounds!?" Rita burst out clearly upset.
"On the grounds that you unlawfully invaded the privacy of students under the age of majority that were not in your care." Hermione spoke up smugly.
"Do you suggest time in Azkaban?" Kingsley asked pulling out a piece of paper.
"No. Since she likes being on Hogwarts grounds so much I suggest she be bound to Hogwarts. The kitchens specifically and put under the House-elves care. 3 months." Minerva suggested and Hermione leaned back against the woman as she watched that sink into Rita.
"It's done. We will detain her until you have had a chance to speak to your head elf, just send him to collect her." Kingsley spoke up seriously.
"You cant be serious." Rita was outraged.
"Very serious Rita. You've broken laws and invaded Miss Granger's privacy and trespassed." Kingsley spoke up firmly and the woman pouted.
"Thank you Kingsley, I would have rather hexed her seven ways to Sunday but this will do." Hermione grinned a little maliciously before getting up off of her loves lap.
"Of course. See you later ladies... Oh Hermione one thing..." Kingsley stepped up beside the witch and leaned down to whisper in her ear. She grinned at his words before whispering her response into the Minister's ear. Minerva noticed that Kingsley looked impressed when he stood upright.
"Let's go, love." Minerva smiled and nodded at Hermione and they tangled their fingers together as they left.
The rest of the morning the two women spent together in the Headmistress' quarters, Hermione was still upset but Minerva made her feel better. By Lunch time the two decided to go to the Great Hall, the students stared at Hermione for a long silent moment before starting to whisper among themselves. Hermione was sitting between Minerva and Rolanda, Fleur was beside Rolanda on the other side.
"'Mione, you know none of us said anything right?" Rolanda spoke up anxiously and Hermione just smiled.
"I know. Rita is an animagus. She's been creeping around the castle undetected apparently." Hermione explained easily.
"She is? What is she?" Filius asked from Minerva's other side.
"A beetle." Minerva supplied.
"'ow appropriate." Fleur sniffed from beside the flying instructor.
"Yep. I got to say though... i'm still bigger." Hagrid speaks up, the smirk unseen beneath his beard but obvious in his eyes.
The staff table was floor with what was a wildly inappropriate comment and just a comment in general that no one expect of the large Professor. The whole table stared at Hagrid, 90% of them looking scandalised. Hermione how ever looked at him flatly for a moment before sniffing and wiping her mouth.
"You're a half-giant. I'd bloody well hope you're bigger." She retorts finally before smiling brightly at the man she had considered a friend for a long time now.
"Thanks Hagrid. I needed that." Hermione smiled fondly.
"'s alright. Its just part of you, not something you need to be ashamed of." Hagrid nodded as though he agreed with himself, which obviously he did.
"I'm beginning to see that." Hermione shrugged and went back to her lunch a soft hand resting on her knee under the table.