AUTHOR'S NOTE: Merry (belated) Christmas! I wrote this in December. It didn't get out until now. Oh well! Enjoy!

Note: This chapter has been edited from it's original form for compliance with the M rating on FanFiction. For the full, MA version of this chapter please visit this same story on Archive of Our Own. The story title and chapter title are the same. The author name is DeepLittleSOB. The link to my Dashboard is in my profile.

It's the shifting of the old, lumpy bed that wakes him up. The movement is slow and cautious, clearly an effort is being made to try and avoid waking him up. It doesn't work.

Rolling over, Dean watches as Lizzy slips back under the covers in the oversized brown sweatshirt she must have once more stolen from Sam. She would live in that thing if she could and at this point maybe Sam should just give it to her. He hasn't worn it since his hair was above his shoulders anyways. That was years ago.

"Hey," Dean drowsily greets as he opens an arm for her, Lizzy smiling softly as she finds that nice, warm nook under his arm that she loves. She lays down next to him, pulling the thick covers over her and sliding an arm around his front, hugging him close.

"Morning," she grins, pressing her face to his t-shirt. "It's cold out there."

"It's winter," Dean reminds without harshness. He yawns wide before asking, "Why you up already? It's not even light out yet."

"Had to get the bird started," she answers, yawning right after him. "Want it done by two so it has to go into that crappy oven before the sun is up."

"Hm," he makes a sound of understanding as he rubs his hand across her arm wrapped around him, eyes once more closed with his head heavily on the pillow. He's exhausted. "The kid still sleeping?"

"Of course not," Lizzy complains, eyes heavy also. "He heard me get up, unlike you."

"Too tired to hear you."

"I know."

Dean lifts his head slightly, looks around the room, and then drops back down. "Where is he?"

"Sam has him," Lizzy tells him. "I dropped the pan for the turkey and woke him up. He came out to see me balancing Sammy in one arm and a turkey in the other and offered to take him for a few."

"That was… awesome of him," Dean mentions, surprised.

"I know," Lizzy laughs lightly. "Usually he likes to sleep in if he can… on the rare days there's nothing to research or drive to."

Dean absently nods, agreeing with her. It grows silent in the room for a moment, the ease of the morning, the warmth of each other, the comfort of knowing Sammy's taken care of and they're allowed to lounge freely all culminating in something akin to perfection.

"Hot Shot?"

Her quietly using his name like that, her voice filled with love as she does, he peeks down at her. Big brown eyes are staring up at him and he smiles back.

"Merry Christmas," she says to him.

The simple words, the same ones said everywhere all over the world to loved ones today, make his heart nearly burst. They made it. They're here. As of just a few weeks ago they were planning out their Christmas as a separated couple, divvying up gifts and figuring out how this broken family thing works on a holiday, but today they're together. She's here. Lizzy's body is molded to his side like it was made to be there and he couldn't be more thankful or downright relieved that he gets to wake up like this again.

Dean leans his head down and kisses her lips once, something sweet about it in the moment. "Merry Christmas, L."

They smile at each other, waking up more and more as the time passes. He can feel her leg bouncing a little under the covers.

"You nervous or something?" he asks her.

Her leg freezes when she then realizes what she's doing. Of course she's nervous. She's going up against the thing so scary it eats angels for breakfast and a couple demons for dinner every day. But he doesn't know that yet. This day will be a lovely day if it kills her so she tells him about the other thing that's making her anxious… but in a good way.

"Wanna go see what Santa left for Sammy?" she grins so wide he can see every one of her white teeth. He remembers that smile from when they were younger. It was one of the things about her that made him fall for her so quickly. Her big, bright, honest smile. He loves that.

"Thought you'd never ask," Dean admits his own excitement as he's already half out of bed. He also has been dying to do the day with his kid, his boy's first Christmas. He's getting a real Christmas, just like the ones he barely remembers as a kid. Presents under the tree, food, family, and the feeling of being truly loved. Christmas was everything. Sammy's going to get to feel that today.

"Knew you were excited for Christmas," Lizzy accuses while pointing at him. She gets up too, already dressed in her requisite yoga pants, warm socks, t-shirt, and Sam's sweatshirt. She pulls her hair up in a ponytail as she watches him get dressed in some black sweatpants and a t-shirt under his own, rarely ever worn gray sweatshirt.

"I'm not happy about us having to wait to kill Dick but if we have to take the day off I can find the fun in it," Dean admits.

"You just want food," Lizzy calls him out as he pulls on some socks and then looks over to her.

He smiles once and leans down to kiss her good once. "Damn right, I want food."

"You're so easy," Lizzy laughs at him and head out of their room.

"Yeah… I know," Dean says simply, knowing he is, and following her to the first floor.

When they get down there they find Sammy in his highchair, Sam sitting in front of him with a container of homemade blueberry and banana baby food in one hand and a spoon in the other.

"Merry Christmas!" Lizzy greets once more to the two men in the room, her grin wide.

"You already said that," Sam reminds, poking fun at her Christmas excitement. They saw each other just a few minutes ago. "Thought you guys were sleeping in."

"Couldn't wait," Lizzy admits, heading for the coffee maker to fire it up.

"Not surprised," Sam laughs at her, another spoonful of fruit to Sammy's mouth, the little boy opening wide for it and eating it all.

"Morning, dude," Dean greets his son as he walks for the highchair. He leans down and plants a kiss on his cheek before gently rubbing his fingers over his thin hair. "Hey," he nods at Sam.

"Hey," Sam greets back, staying relaxed and pushing his anxiety for tomorrow aside. Lizzy wants this and he can let her have it. No fighting on Christmas and no spilling coveted secrets.

"He eat that whole thing?" Dean asks, seeing the small plastic container almost empty. It was meant to be two servings.

"Are you surprised?" Sam huffs slightly, scraping together the last full bite of breakfast. Sammy eats it down happily, his mouth a mess of food globs. Sam places the empty container and spoon on the table and goes into autopilot, having cared for Sammy enough to know how it all works. He uses Sammy's bib to wipe up his face before taking it off. Sam then grabs a wipe from the container he wisely got out before he started breakfast time. Once Sammy's hands are cleaned off along with the highchair tray he pulls the tray off the chair and unbuckles his nephew. "Up and at 'em, kiddo."

Sam picks him up and pulls him in, putting Sammy on his hip as cleans up the mess they made during meal time.

And Dean just watches it all happen. He's shocked. Of the two of them he didn't ever really know how Sam would be with children. Most kid-involved hunts made Sam take a step back and take care of business while Dean was always the more hands-on hunter when it comes to person-to-person interactions, checking on the children and making sure they're generally alright within their scary situation.

But right now, with his nephew in his arm as he speaks intelligently to him without being too dumbed down or patronizing, Dean's highly impressed. And proud. Sam's a great uncle, better than Dean could have hoped he'd be.

"Food done, big man," Sam speaks absently to him. "And most of it made it into your mouth this time too!" Sam then licks the pad of his thumb and wipes at a spot of purple mush that he missed on his Sammy's cheek. "And now, you're about to find out what it's like to be spoiled by Santa!"

"Da. Da-da," Sammy says, his finger pointing at the other man in the room, and Sam smiles.

"Who? That guy?" Sam nods at Dean after dropping the used plastic contained in the sink. "You want that guy?"

"Dada. Daaah," Sammy babbles on and smiles wide when he looks up at Sam. He presses his hands together with excitement to see his dad in the room.

"Yeah… alright," Sam laments as he heads for Dean. "I'll let you go to him but you should know he isn't actually as cool as he thinks he is."

"Cooler than you are," Dean comments quietly as Sammy leans into him with outstretched arms. He grins wide to get his arms around his little boy for the first time all day. He feels a little bad taking him from Sam but only a little. "What's going on, buddy?"

Sammy just grins up at him, drool on his chin and his few teeth visible. For the millionth time his heart nearly explodes with love for this child.

Dean blows a hard raspberry on Sammy's cheek, the boy squealing with delight.

"Here, dada," Lizzy smiles and jokes as she hands over a mug of black coffee to him.

"Thanks," Dean tells her, very happy to have it. It's damn early. "You ready for this?"

Lizzy pauses, knowing he couldn't know the actual meaning behind that question, and she grins anyways. "Very."

"Wait… let me just get Lou," Sam says, heading for their bedroom where she's sleeping. "She'll wanna see this."

"Be careful," Lizzy shouts back in jest, knowing waking Lou up isn't always pleasant. She takes a seat on the couch, Dean sitting next to her with Sammy in his lap facing him. She grabs Sammy's hand and looks to her husband. "I'm really glad we get this… today, I mean. Christmas and all."

The way she smiles he can tell something is off. "What's wrong?"

She looks shocked by his assessment. "Nothing. I'm actually happy today."

He narrows his eyes at her. "You telling the truth?"

She rolls hers. "Yes, Dean. I'm seriously happy. Maybe you're just picking up on my fears for tomorrow."

He nods, thinking she's worried about his life being on the line. "Don't think about tomorrow." He leans over and kisses her forehead.

"Trying not to," she responds and sighs, moving on quickly. "The tree looks pretty good."

They both turn to the pine tree Dean and Sam cut down from the back of the cabin last night. They decorated it with empty beer cans, the fluff from an old pillow draped to look like snow, the little, multicolored Christmas lights Castiel randomly appeared with, and other random knickknacks they were able to rummage around the cabin for.

"My favorite one? The tampon tied to a tree branch," Lizzy laughs as she looks at it. Lou pulled it out of her purse as a joke but Lizzy found it funny enough to keep it.

"I like the shot glass myself," Dean comments, nodding to the upside-down shot glass at the very top of the tree instead of a star.

"You like it because you took the shot," she grins, nudging him in the shoulder.

"Maybe," Dean nods, knowing that was it. He then looks at Sammy. "We're actually pulling this off, aren't we?"

"He won't remember it… but we will," Lizzy smiles wide at that idea. "We did our job for once."

"Up top," Dean says, deadpan. He raises a hand and Lizzy high-fives him for their success for once.

Lizzy then leans her head on Dean's shoulder while watching Sammy look around the room curiously as always. "I love you guys."

Dean's mouth quirks up on one side as he looks down at her. He then lifts Sammy up without a word and presses his drooly face to hers.

"Ugh," Lizzy laughs out, her face wet with the somewhat Sammy kiss. She wipes her cheek and mouth when Dean plops their son back into his lap. "Thanks for that."

Dean lets go of an uncharacteristic laugh before leaning into her, pressing his lips to her sweetly once. "We love you too, momma."

When Sam cautiously pushes the door of their bedroom open he's grateful that Lou doesn't move yet. He knows she can be grouchy when woken for no good reason. She values her sleep too much.

Shutting the door quietly behind himself, letting it click into place nearly silently, Sam walks to the bed in his sock-clad feet without a sound. He slips his sweatshirt down his long arms and drops it on the floor. He then gets slowly back into bed, his sweatpants and t-shirt from the night still on.

Lou breathes in deeply when an arm snakes around her waist, pulling her just slightly from her sleep. She hums groggily when a long frame moves up against her backside, knowing already it is Sam. He settles in there, Lou pulls his arm around her tighter as she prepares to go back to sleep.

Sam has other ideas though.

Now, waking Lou is a scary task. He's been yelled at for it, called some very creative names, and even punched in the chest once. She sleeps like a log now that she's really readjusted back into the world. Purgatory doesn't affect her all that much these days. Instead, she's reverted to the early-twenty-something she was when she left. Sleeping is pretty high up on the priority list.

"Merry Christmas," Sam says in a hushed voice, face buried in her terribly red-tinted hair.

"Shh," Lou shushes him, patting his forearm around her middle. "Sleep."

Sam smirks at that. Usually that will work on him, a lone hushing and a warm bed with her in it. He'll go back to sleep, it's too inviting not to.

But not today. It's Christmas. She needs to get up or she'll regret missing Sammy opening gifts.

With his free arm, Sam brushes Lou's hair away from her neck. He lays down comfortably behind her and places one small kiss on the back of her neck.

Lou hums again, contented and assuming he's just getting comfortable to fall back to sleep.

He's not. Sam slips his arm out of her grip when it weakens as she quickly starts to slip back into sleep. As his lips brush her neck again, he lets his hand move down her soft, old t-shirt to its bottom hem. He slips his fingers under it, tracing the top line of her panties, the shirt and underwear her usual bedtime wear. He works slowly, lazily, keeping the slow and easy morning to just that. Slow and easy.

Lou shifts a little, her stomach fluttering when some part of her recognizes what's happening. Yet, she's not fully aware. She tired. She heard Sammy crying a lot last night. He woke her up three times. She wants sleep.

But then she feels Sam tongue trace the shell of her ear as his hand cups her through her panties.

She's more awake now, fully aware of what Sam's doing.

"Mm," Lou buzzes when her desire instantly perks up. The stresses and worries of the day haven't been able to enter her mind yet so there's nothing to deter her from getting turned on very quickly.

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

When she's past the intensity, Lou goes completely lax in Sam's arms, breathing deeply with closed eyes.

"Oh fuck yeah," Lou huffs out in a grateful voice, one that has Sam letting out a little laugh at her as he lets her go, pulling his arm out from under her and removing his hand from her panties.

"Alright, time to get up," Sam says simply and with a tone that gives nothing away of what they were just involved in.

Lou quickly turns to face him in bed, eyes wide. "What!?" she asks with shock. "No fucking way. We have some more work to do." She reaches for his pants immediately.

"No time," Sam denies. "It's Christmas. Time to see what Santa brought."

Lou opens her mouth to protest but her voice disappears when Sam pops the two fingers he had inside her into his mouth, quickly sucking them clean in a very nonchalant way. He then grins and gets out of bed.

"You can't just… and then, with your fingers… and then leave!" Lou tells him all flustered, her engine revved and ready to keep going.

"You miss Sammy's first Christmas morning and you know you'll regret it," Sam tells her, pulling some sweatpants of hers off the one dresser in the room and tossing them onto the bed for her.

"Yeah but…" she pauses, mind blown with how quickly his attitude has shifted. "What about you?"

"What about me?" he wonders, picking his sweatshirt up off the floor and pulling it back on.

"You're hard on is making it a little obvious that we've been up to something," Lou motions towards the front of his pants.

Sam looks down and sees the tent.

"Let me take care of that for you," Lou suggests, eyebrows wagging a little.

He looks at her, seemingly thinking it over, before saying, "Nah."

"Nah?" Lou asks with shock.

"Nah," he repeats, adjusting himself so he's pinned to his own stomach with the waist of his sweatpants. "That's what elastic waists are for." He then holds his arms out to the side, showing he's dealt with the issue. No tent.

"You're really gonna just leave this room right now," Lou states, knowing he will.

Sam just smirks, winks at her, and opens the door. "One," he says to her before disappearing into the cabin.

"One what?" she whispers to herself, confused.

Once she can't see him anymore, just hear his voice say that Lou's on her way out, she flops onto her back with frustration. Yes, that wake up was good. Very good. But it got her ready for more. She knows she's insatiable, that most women would be fine with that wake up and nothing more. Hell, most women would be proud of their men for not expecting more for themselves. But she wouldn't have minded a little more fun.

Then again, it is Sammy's first Christmas. She knows why Sam woke her up like this. She's in a good mood. And if they spent more time in their room than they did then Dean and Lizzy would have given up waiting, which she's sure they're doing right now, and opened presents without her. That would suck.

"Alright," Lou says to herself, shoving her tired and sated body out of bed to get some clothes on. She knows when he's won.

"Ok, you guys know we can't pack up all these toys in a car, right?" Lou asks Dean and Lizzy as they are both spread out on a blanket on the cabin floor with Sammy. There's ripped up wrapping paper everywhere, toys all strewn about, and a little boy sitting in the middle of it with wide eyes and overwhelmed senses.

"Downer," Dean name-calls as he's holding a big toy car he found the night before. It's red, cartoonish, but a car nonetheless. He's popping batteries into it so it can be played with as he's sitting Indian-style in jeans and a t-shirt.

"She makes a valid point," Sam comments as he opens up a trash bag and starts to collect the wrapping paper.

"We know we have to ditch some of this stuff," Lizzy explains. "But now he gets his pick. Whatever Sammy likes the most, we take. The rest we leave behind. Plus, who knows? Maybe we'll be back here in the future."

"And it's not like we paid for all this ourselves anyways," Dean tells them with a slick smirk as he finishes his task.

"Josh Smith did," Lizzy laughs a little as she watches Dean turn on the oversized, plastic toy car. The head lights flash, the horn beeps, and when he puts it on the blanket it starts to drive around on its own in a random pattern. "Oh boy, Sammy! Check it out!"

When she points at the toy making its way somewhat slowly across the blanket the little boy takes a look. The lights. The noise. It moves on its own. He's very intrigued.

Moving quickly, Sammy crawls for the car. When he reaches it, it turns and heads in a new direction. Sammy chases it down, crawling quickly, but every time he just about gets to it the car speeds away faster than he can go.

At one point he sits back on his diapered bottom and watches it. His wide eyes land on Lizzy when he's totally enthralled by the toy.

"So exciting, right?!" she says to him with a bright smile.

Sammy smiles wide, his hands clapped together a couple times with excitement before he gives chase again.

"That thing is awesome," Lou tells them, sipping her whiskey-spiked mug of coffee as she watches. "It'll keep him happy for hours."

"And get him nice and tired, hopefully," Lizzy laughs a little, watching her son have total fun as he finally catches up to the toy car. He grabs at it, touching the headlights with curiosity.

"Knew he'd like that one." Dean grins proudly.

"Yes, he has grease in his veins already," Lizzy jests with an eye roll and Dean gives her a look.

"He better."

"I still think he has ballet in his veins, but whatever…."

"He's not a ballerina, L…."

"Have you seen him pointe his toes?" Lizzy asks in rebuttal. "He has great arches…."

As Lou listens to Lizzy and Dean slightly jab, she doesn't notice right away as Sam sits down next to her on the couch. He drops the bag of trash next to him on the floor for now and he smiles at her.

"Hey," Lou greets, still happy from her lovely wake up that morning.

"Hey," Sam repeats and holds out a small box wrapped in Christmas paper.

Her face drops. "What's this?"

He shrugs. "Just something." Lou still doesn't take the box. "Take it."

"I didn't get you anything," she worries immediately.

"I don't care," Sam half laughs at the idea.

"I do," she says. "Shit. I knew I should have gone with you guys into town…."

"Lou. Stop," Sam sweetly says to her with a small smile. "That's not what this is about. You stayed here to plan out tomorrow and that's pretty damn important, more important than a present. And I didn't head out yesterday with the plan to buy you anything at all. I just… saw it. And got it for you."

Lou's expression melts along with her heart. "Oh my God. You are way too good to be with me."

"Shut up and take it," Sam tells her, holding the small box out for her once more.

Lou reluctantly does, holding her coffee between her knees in order to open her gift. Her heart skips when she sees that it's a small, square shaped jewelry box under the wrapping paper. Shit. It's a ring box. A fucking ring box.

Lou's eyes scan the room quickly. Dean and Lizzy are still focused solely on Sammy and each other. If this were… a specific kind of ring… Lizzy would be staring at her with some sappy, stupid face as she got ready to watch a very important question be asked of her. Ok. So maybe she doesn't need to be scared.

When she turns to look at Sam he reads the worry all over her face. "Oh, come on! It's not that. Relax."

She exhales hard with relief and presses a hand to her forehead. "You scared the shit outta me there, Giant."

His face drops. "You know, you might be the only woman on the planet that's actually scared of diamond rings."

Her face gets red. "I'm sorry. It's not anything against you, Sam… you know that."

"I get it," Sam nods, pretending the reaction didn't hurt a little. "Just open it, would you?"

Lou sighs, hoping he isn't just saying that he understands. She wish she wasn't this broken. Instead of dwell on it, Lou lifts the top of the box and looks in.

She grins wide. "Oh my God," she lightly laughs with fondness as she sees the basic, simple silver ring. It's identical to the ring her mother gave her years ago. But this one is brand new, no dents and scratches from all her years hunting. "It looks just like the one mom gave me."

"I know," Sam says, reaching into his t-shirt collar. He pulls out the leather cord that's always around his neck, the very ring Lou's speaking of still hung there close to him at all times. "Same size and everything."

"Why are you giving me a new one?" Lou asks, not upset. On the contrary, she's quite happy with the gesture.

"Well, you gave this one to me so… I replaced it." He grins and remembers Lizzy giving it to him after Lou had died. He hung onto the ring with a fierceness, the item always reminding him of the best friend he'd ever had and that she'd always want him to keep going and doing the right thing. And then when she came back, Lou told him to hang onto it for her… knowing that even if he had it she'd never be far from that ring her mother gave her. He pulls out the collar of his t-shirt again and drops the ring back under it. He nods to the box. "Take it out. Read it."

Lou does. She pulls it out of the box and looks to the inside of the basic band. There it is, inscribed just the same as her old one. Do What You Believe is Right.

"I didn't want you to go without it just because I had the old one," he explains. "And even if you're better at remembering to do the right thing than I am… it's still a good reminder."

"But how the hell did you find this exact ring and get it inscribed in one shopping trip?" Lou finally asks, not seeing how it was possible.

This is where he clams up a bit, looking away with a guilty smile.

"What?" Lou wonders, not getting his reaction.

"Ok. So… one of the jewelry stores at the mall we went to has a special line. It's… I guess you could call it their nerd line."

"Nerd line?" Lou repeats, wondering what the hell he's talking about.

"Yeah, you know… the ring from Lord of the Rings, the Titanic heart necklace, the Green Lantern ring… and this."

"This!?" Lou asks with wide eyes. "Why is my ring a nerdy replica thing!?"

"Apparently, avid fans of the book series have been asking for it so the company started making them," he explains. "You can buy Dean's necklace too, if you want."

"No thanks," Lou says with a faraway voice as she thinks. "So… there are people out there with this exact ring… wearing it because they're fans of the book that our lives are basically chronicled in?"

"Yeah," he huffs with amusement. "Trippy, right?"

"Super trippy," she furrows her brow with surprise. "And it kinda makes my ring less special."

"How so?" Sam wonders.

"They're manufactured now. This used to be a one of a kind."

"Well, that one's still pretty special."

She looks at him funny. "How do you figure?"

"I gave it to you." He says it simply and she smiles again.

"Stop being cute. It's annoying," she says, pushing him lightly in the chest. Sam just brushes it off, knowing she loves it even if she'd never admit it. "I, uh… I feel weird about this whole thing."

"Don't," Sam tells her. "I mean, I was pretty weirded out at first too. It's bad enough that our lives are paperback novels in the sale section of comic book stores all over the place but… it's not all bad."

"Oh no?" Lou wonders, wanting his outlook.

"Think about it. There are girls out there wearing a ring that's reminding them to be a good person, to think about their lives before acting and to live well, all because of you. I can think of worse things."

Lou's face lightens with that as she stares at him. He's so right. She's helped out people without even knowing she was doing it. And only Sam would think so deeply about a situation like this one and come out seeing the positive of it.

Leaning towards him, Lou places a hand to his jaw and kisses him in thanks. It's a weird gift but it's also very thoughtful. And now she gets to know that a simple pop culture reference turned wearable accessory might touch other lives like it has hers. That's a true gift.

"Thank you," she tells him, kissing him once more before backing away. She looks down at the ring in her hold and smiles as she puts it on. "Seriously, Sam. Thank you."

"You're welcome," he tells her and kisses her temple before getting up and continuing his pickup duty.

And Lou just sits there, grinning like an idiot in love as she looks at the ring. Her Sam. He's not bad.

"Don't wake him!" Dean warns with a harsh whisper as Lizzy gets a little too close to their son as she takes a picture of his snoozing face.

"Back off, man," Lizzy smirks as she takes a few more pictures before slowly backing away. "We have Christmas music on and he's barely hearing that. I'm fine." When she stands up Dean walks up next to her, arm around her shoulder as they look down.

"I mean, come on," Dean says, grinning as they watch Sammy unmoving on the blanket on the floor, his head resting on the new stuffed moose that's all but replaced the ratty stuffed doggy he's had for a while now. He's surrounded by toys and he's in little kid heaven.

"That's the cutest thing I've ever seen," Lizzy says to him, not taking her eyes off her boy.

"I think we pulled it off," Dean mentions, looking at her face. His wife is happy for the first time in a while. Just truly happy. Nothing less.

"We totally did," she says proudly and high-fives him. "We rule Christmas."

"Yeah we do," Dean agrees, pulling her in a little. They just stand there for a quick second longer before silently agreeing to let him snooze off the morning excitement.

They walk for the kitchen table where Lou and Sam are sitting, diving into breakfast.

"Ah, Lou. You outdid yourself," Dean cheerfully says as he sits down to eat.

"And thank you for covering breakfast without burning it," Lizzy adds in as she also sits. "I'll be busy with dinner the rest of the day."

"Yeah, 'cause you're insane," Lou rolls her eyes. "I woulda been happy with some sandwiches."

"You shut your mouth," Dean points at Lou quickly. "Dinner is happening."

Lou just looks at him blankly, not liking his tone directed at her.

"Take it down, Hot Shot," Lizzy covers over his index finger with her hand and lowers it. "I'm making dinner no matter what. That's how I do Christmas."

Dean sits back in his chair and nods. He wasn't willing to lose a real Christmas again. He'd never really had one in his adult life until Lizzy showed up. Every year she does what she can, either in a crappy motel room or at Bobby's that one time they were able to make it back to Sioux Falls in time. She makes a huge meal, the best food he eats all year, and it's made with love. He has so little normal things in his life. He's not letting this one go.

"Done?" Lou asks as she looks at Sam's empty plate.

"Yeah," he tells her and she stands up, taking both their plates away. They got a head start on eating as the parents couldn't pull themselves away from their son.

"So what's up for the rest of the day?" Sam asks Lizzy, knowing she probably has a plan.

"Mm," she hums, swallowing her first bite of eggs. "Dinner should be done around 2:00. Then I figure we can watch Christmas movies, drink, and generally do nothing but relax. Then maybe the town Christmas thing they do if we're up for it. The schedule's pretty open. All I ask is that we don't speak about tomorrow."

The request has a different meaning for Lou and Sam. They keep her secret.

"Other than that… whatever we do is good for me," Lizzy smiles at Dean solely, hoping he hasn't yet picked up any more off behavior from her due to nervousness.

"Sounds fan-freakin'-tastic to me," Dean says, shoveling a large bite of eggs into his mouth. He groans with delight immediately. "Mm. Best eggs ever."

"Damn straight, dude," Lou smiles at his enjoyment. Praise like that from Dean over food is always the highest of all compliments.

"How long you think he'll be out?" Sam asks, nodding at Sammy and raising his mug for a final sip of his coffee.

"Not too long," Lizzy admits. "Sleeping on the floor makes for short naps for whatever reason."

"Yeah… we got about an hour tops," Dean says with yet another full mouth, bacon this time.

"Hey, easy. Don't choke," Lizzy makes fun.

Dean just shoots her a look. "What? It's good."

"I couldn't tell," Lizzy rolls her eyes.

"I'm gonna get the diaper bag then," Sam says to Dean and Lizzy. "He'll need to be changed when he gets up."

The parents pause as Sam stands up, intent to head to their room. Lizzy clears her throat. "Excuse me… what?"

"I'll change his diaper," Sam shrugs and heads for the stairs.

"Uh… ok…." Lizzy gets confused.

"Consider it my gift since I didn't get you one," Sam smiles.

"Will do," Dean says in shock.

"Thanks, Sam!" Lizzy yells after him. Once Sam disappears upstairs she looks at Lou. "He's in a good mood."

"Yeah… he is," Lou suspiciously says, looking at the staircase. "Should I be worried?"

"Because he's happy?" Lizzy huffs a laugh.

"It's not like him. Should I get the silver and holy water?" Lou wonders, glancing at her new ring she's wearing. He's exceptionally cheery today, he gave her a gift… something isn't normal here.

"He's never liked Christmas this much, so maybe," Dean jokes, plate half cleared already.

Lou makes a concerned face. "Don't get me wrong, it's a nice change of pace but it makes me wonder what's got him decking the damn halls like Saint fucking Nick…."

"Hey!" they all hear Sam call down. "You guys know where the wipes are?"

"Should be in the baby bag!" Lizzy shouts up.

"I don't see em'!"

She puts her fork down. "I'll take a look…."

"No, no! Stay there," Sam calls down. "Eat up while it's hot. Lou, come help me find the wipes!"

Lou makes a sour, confused face. "Seriously!?"

"Seriously, come on up," Sam says to her.

The three others all look at each other with the strange moment.

Lou stands up without saying anything. She walks to the weapon packed duffle by the door and fishes out a silver knife quickly. She shows to the other two as she twirls it once with expertise, eliciting a smirk from Lizzy, before heading up with it in her grasp.

When she walks into the bedroom she finds Sam standing there, waiting for her. The baby bag is on Lizzy and Dean's bed, a box of wipes sitting next to it.

"Uh… I found em'," Lou flatly tells him, pointing at the wipes he 'couldn't find'.

"Thanks," Sam smiles at her oddly, not moving from his place.

"Here." She holds out the knife, sliver handle first.

Sam just gives her a questioning look.

Lou sighs. "The offering to change Sammy, the getting up early to take him Lizzy, the ring and the wake up you gave me… I'm not convinced you're you. Take it. Prove you're Sam Winchester."

"Are you serious?" Sam asks, arms crossing over his chest with insult.

She drops her arm to the side, lowering the knife. "You're not Mister Claus, Sam. You don't care about holiday shit. This is all kinda weird."

Shifting on his feet, Sam knows she makes a good point. He's never enjoyed Christmas. He always knew that everyone else out there was having a day he'd never had, with family and a home, a real home. But this year… it felt different.

"Give it," Sam tells her, holding his hand out. Lou drops the hand in his hand. No sizzle. "It's me."

Sam then tosses the knife into the corner of the room somewhere, doing it blindly as his eyes never leave hers, and reaches for her.

Before Lou knows what's happening, Sam grasping hard to her black yoga pants she stole from Lizzy and shoves them down her legs, taking her panties with them. She's shocked and her head spins when he then picks her up by the waist and drops her swiftly onto the cleared-off dresser top.

"What are you doing?" Lou wonders frantically as Sam yanks her clothing that is bunched around her knees fully off.

Stepping up between her legs, Sam doesn't answer her. He leans down and presses his lips to her, taking a moment to kiss her. It's deep and filled with promise. And she pulls him closer, falling into it hard.

When he ends the kiss he just smiles at her once, something playful behind her eyes, before dropping to his knees.

"Sam, what is going… oh… ooh, oh god," Lou tries to ask him what is happening but she gets cut off.

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Lou giggles.

She's never been the type of girl to giggle but she damn sure does ever time she's come particularly hard. It's earning a gold star in class. It's the pat on the back after a job well done. It's her version of giving him the knowledge that he's thoroughly wrecked her.

Sam stands up while looking her right in the eye. He runs a palm down his mouth to clean off his face a bit and Lou's wide eyes are glued to him.

"Found 'em!" Sam yells out the door as he smirks at Lou knowingly, picking up the baby bag off the bed and grabbing the pack of wipes.

She looks at him with bewilderment for his quick change in demeanor.

"It's Jesus' birthday… don't use his name in vain, huh?"

"Are you joking?" Lou gets upset with his lame joke.

Sam just smile his million watt, easy smile that he rarely ever has. He then says breezily, "Two."

And he leaves the room.

Lou sits stunned on the dresser, legs still wide open and not an item of clothing on below her waist. He came at her hard and fast. And that orgasm was big. It was amazing.

"Oh god," Lou says to herself when it dawns on her. Two. That was the second time he made her come that day. "He's gonna keep doing this."

Sam's giving her the gift of unexpected orgasms.

Who is this man? He certainly isn't the super uptight boy she had to pry the jeans off of when they met anymore. Maybe she finally is pulling that stick out of his ass and making him fun. Or maybe he's finally seeing he needs to enjoy life while he has it.

Whatever it is, she's loving this new version of him. He's awesome.

"How's it going in here?"

When Lizzy turns to her side she sees Lou, hip leaning into the very tiny counter with her arms crossed.

"Slowly… and difficultly," Lizzy answers, her voice still light however. "But even if we have an old fashioned ice box for a fridge and a counter that's smaller than a fucking coffee table, I'm making work." She then grins warmly before looking back down at the bowl she's working with, the boiled potatoes halfway to properly mashed.

"You need anything?" Lou wonders.

"From you? No," Lizzy laughs at Lou's expense.

Lou just gives her a stern, narrowed look. "What do you have left to do?"

"I have to… sauté the green beans and finish up the gravy… and I was gonna ask Dean or Sam to carve up the bird."

Lou doesn't say a word. She just walks around the small kitchen space and gathers what's needed, making it clear that she's taking over the green beans.

"What are you doing?" Lizzy asks her with light joking.

"Watch and learn, darling," Lou sasses right back, placing the large pan on a burner to warm it up.

"Learn what!?" Lizzy laughs at her. "How to burn food?"

"Watch and learn," Lou quietly repeats, her confidence hidden. She knows what she's doing. She had time to learn while living the boring domestic life for over a month. Her skills have vastly improved with time and patience. And a nephew to feel the need to cook for.

"At least if you ruin the only vegetables set for dinner you'll make a new best friend in Dean," Lizzy laughs to herself, Lou still keeping her voice quiet.

"Watch and learn."

Lizzy gives up and just shakes her head. Sure, if Lou screws up a dish she'll be a little pissed but life is bigger than a side dish. So she lets it go.

"So… get anything good from Santa?" Lizzy asks, her playful tone of voice being used as she looks to Lou next to her at the tiny counter out of the corner of her eyes.

Lou, knife in hand as she begins to chop up the fresh green beans, rolls her eyes.

"What?" Lizzy wonders, seeing the reaction.

"You know what I got," Lou says with a mopey voice, not wanting to talk about it.

"I do," Lizzy admits, grinning giddily. "You love it?"

"It was a very nice gesture."

"Nice gesture?" Lizzy scoffs at her. "Are you fucking kidding me with that? It was so fucking sweet."

"Alright, alright. Calm the fuck down," Lou hushes out, not wanting Sam to hear them talking.

"Why are we suddenly whispering?" Lizzy wonders. "He already knows what he got you. He's the one that bought it."

"I know… I just, I didn't want him to hear us talking about him or whatever."

Lizzy sighs heavily. "You're so fucking frustrating."

"Bite me, bitch," Lou says quickly, chopping away and trying to keep busy for the conversation. "I'm not used to gifts and attention and that kind of stuff, you know that."

"Yeah, I do… and eventually you're gonna have to get used to it because he's always gonna be that way," Lizzy tells her. "Sam, under the hunter bullshit, is still a conventional kind of guy. He believes in holding doors and buying flowers."

"And I don't need any of that crap," Lou points out. "Never have, never will."

Lizzy shakes her head. "Every girl likes that stuff even if she says she doesn't."

"Not me," Lou strongly returns. "That shit is empty and pointless. Buy me a six pack and don't forget the condoms, I say."

Face screwed up in confusion, Lizzy just says, "Well, at least pretend you like that stuff when Sam does it. It makes him happy to do nice things for you so let him and shut your loud fucking mouth about it."

"Excuse you?" Lou eyes her hard for her rude ways.

"Most women would die to be in your shoes," Lizzy lets go of the masher in her hand and turns to her sister. "You know that? A hot man like Sam, one that's also attentive and sweet and caring and always thinking of you? Hell, I'm still not convinced you deserve him."

Lou's blank face stares at her sister a second before saying, "I don't."

Lizzy jokingly shoves her in the shoulder before returning to her mashed potatoes. "I was being mean. You totally deserve him."

"He's too nice for me," Lou says easily. "I know this. I'm a bitch and he's incredibly sweet. It's unfair to him."

"You're not a bitch," Lizzy says.

"I am, but thanks," Lou gripes right back.

"No you're not… and I bet whatever you got him proves that you aren't a bitch," she says to her.

Lou stays silent.

"What… you don't want to tell me what you got him?" Lizzy questions.

"I… didn't get him anything," Lou admits. "You guys when to the mall. I was here the whole time. I couldn't get him anything."

"Dude, it's not about money," Lizzy reminds her, adding a splash more milk to the mashed potatoes. "It's about knowing him well enough and proving it."

"Alright, smart ass. What'd you get Dean then?" Lou asks, looking right at Lou as she pauses her work. She never saw Lizzy hand a gift over so she thinks she didn't give one.

Lizzy grins. "You mean besides a son?" Lou rolls her eyes. "Pie."

"You got him pie?" she asks incredulously.

"Yep, about five of them," she explains. "We needed to go low key after buying so much for Sammy. We didn't want to shut down the credit card we've been using by buying too much too fast."

"Weren't you just gonna make a pie anyways?" Lou wonders, knowing Lizzy always did pie with Christmas dinner.

"This one doesn't count," she nods to the already made blueberry on the table ready to be baked. "I gave him five coupons, redeemable for one pie each. Whenever he wants."

Thinking for a moment, Lou conceded. "Ok, that's pretty fucking good."

"I know." Lizzy grins wide, recalling the way Dean's face lit up when she handed them over amid the chaos of presents that morning.

"What'd he get you?"

Her smile grows wider. "A Van Halen t-shirt just like the one dad got me years ago… that got ruined." She stops there, not needing to rehash getting shot by Buck and Wade and the whole heaven trip that ended the life of one of her favorite mementos.

"Seriously!?" Lou asks, shocked at the thoughtfulness.

"Yeah," she answers, unable to stop grinning. "Apparently he's had it for months. He saw it out on the road at some point and kept it stowed in his bag until Christmas." She huffs an unbelieving laugh. "Even when we were a mess and I wanted out, he kept that shirt. He was still gonna give it to me anyways."

"Shit."

"What?" Lizzy asks.

"I didn't get Sam anything," Lou admits, feeling like shit. "Told you he deserves better."

"Relax, ok? He's not expecting anything…."

"That's worse!" Lou panics slightly. "He doesn't expect anything of me. That says a lot about how he sees me."

"Not what I meant…."

"I'm totally gonna fuck this up, aren't I?" Lou wonders.

"Fuck what up?" Lizzy gets confused.

"All of it," Lou says, going back to her green beans and chopping even harder. "I'll fuck this up like I fuck everything up."

"This again," Lizzy rolls her eyes. "How, after all this time and all this… everything… are you still convinced that Sam will leave you?"

Lou doesn't answer that. She's never seen a fully functioning, healthy relationship. Even Lizzy and Dean have had their messes. What makes her think she could get any guy to want her for good when she screws up something as easy as Christmas?

"Alright, stop freaking out," Lizzy starts to try and help when she can see the internal conflict happening.

"I'm not freaking out."

"And I'm not someone you can lie to," Lizzy reminds, bumping her with her hip. "And Christmas isn't over. You can still give Sam a gift. Just think about it hard. What would Sam really love from you? Something that doesn't cost anything and you can make happen in this cabin?"

Lou already knows the answer. It comes to her so quickly that she knows it's right. It'll be the hardest gift she'll ever give, it'll be something she never planned to ever do in her life, but she's got to trust and have complete faith in a man at some point, doesn't she? And if she can't trust Sam then she's doomed to be alone anyways.

"I got an idea…."

One More Note: So, I need to explain my slow down in publishing. I've been all over the place, about a week's time between chapter publications, and they're inconsistent. Sometimes it's Monday, then Thursday, then maybe Wednesday... it's been all over and I've never been like that in the four+ years I've been writing. But my life has changed recently. I'm pregnant. I never saw it coming after two years of trying but we got extremely lucky and this shocked us that it actually happened. I am not flaunting this, I am not looking for congrats and well wishes. After suffering infertility for so long, I would never. I just needed you all, you lovely readers you, to know why I've slowed down and why I will probably only get worse in the future. Right now I am exhausted and that doesn't seem to have an end for me. And later on my free time will severely dwindle. However, I will promise to do everything I can to keep this story going through to the end of the show and the end of my story line. I could never quit now. But it may be crappy when I don't put anything out for weeks on end in some future months. I just wanted you all to understand and I hope you all have the patience to deal with me and stick with it for me. Thanks everyone!