May 14

Note to self: never eat sushi again. EVER.

I know that Miko feels horrible about it, but still…

Here's what happened; a day before the most recent football game Miko invited a bunch of us to share some homemade sushi. I agreed 'cause I love the stuff and it was good, don't get me wrong, but mine seemed a bit off. Well, it turns out, the fish over here shouldn't be left out for longer than two hours and someone forgot to tell her.

To make a long story short, I ended up making sacrifices to the porcelain god on a regular basis. At first I thought it was just 'cause I had too much ice cream beforehand (I mean it was cookie dough; how could I not?) or some bug, but when Carson stopped by to see if I was all right (others got sick as well and did the smart thing in going to the infirmary instead of their rooms) and I told him what had happened...he told me differently.

So yea, no longer gonna eat sushi.

At least Evan got sick as well (he snagged a piece while Miko was making it), so I guess that there is some justice in the world.

And on that note things are still awkward around Logan. I just hope that we can work this out before-

Thud.

"Fuck."

I pause in my writing when I hear that word and look up to see Jason wide-eyed with a hand clamped over his mouth. He had just knocked over a bottle of glue and uttered the expletive after it had hit the ground. I wag a finger and he comes walking towards me.

"Did you just say what I though you did?"

He nods his head slowly, fear now setting into his eyes.

"And where did you here this word?" I know that it wasn't me, I'm always careful of my wording around the kids. Like my mother used to say, "Little pitchers have big ears."

Jason just looks down at the ground and mumbles something.

"Excuse me?"

"The soldiers and daddy." He replies.

The soldiers and daddy, huh? Looks like I'm going to have a little talk with them.

And as if to illustrate his accusation, I hear the sound of footsteps and then men singing. My eyes go wide as I hear; "...There was blood upon the risers, there was brains upon the 'chute. His intestines was a'dangling from his paratrooper's suite. They poured him from his helmet and poured him from his boots, AND HE AIN'T GONNA JUMP NO MORE!!!"

Oh. My. God. That's horrible.

I stick my head out of the door just in time to catch a glimpse of Sergeant Stackhouse. Hmm, at least I now know who to direct my wrath at.

And if that wasn't enough I then hear, "There once was a women from Nantucket-"

"Ok, who wants to play a game?" I say rather loudly in order to drown out the rest of the poem that I know by heart (don't ask…just don't ask). "What about Monopoly?"

Luckily, they agree and we start a game. The rest of the day passes without anything "colorful" being said and afterwards I head out to "talk" to Stackhouse.

-----

It's not hard to find the Marines. I mean, they're always in groups together and usually the loudest ones. I know some of them and they know me from the football games (when I have time to play; which isn't often) so it's not like I'm completely oblivious to their brand of humor.

But this time they've gone too far.

"Sergeant Stackhouse!" I call out, mad as hell.

He turns around to see me walking towards him and says when he sees me, "Major Lorne's not here, if that's what you were wondering."

I shake my head, "I'm not looking for the Major, I want to talk to you."

He flashes a grin and says, "Sure, what's on your mind?"

The other Marines around us cat-call and tease Stackhouse. I want to roll my eyes at the immaturity but restrain myself because I'm more pissed at Stackhouse. "Sing any good songs today?" I say while raising an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?" Stackhouse asks, confusion appearing on his face.

"Today when you ran past the classroom; sing anything interesting?"

It takes about five seconds for him to realize what I'm getting at and then a faint blush appears. I can't help but bite back a smirk; I don't think I've even seen a Marine blush before. "Teaching the kids about Noah's Ark by singing 'The animals came in standard two-by-two cover formation, hurrah, hurrah' was bad enough," I say, the amusement gone. "but this...this crosses the line!"

"Sorry." He replies in an even tone.

I get the feeling that he's not really sorry and that just pisses me off even more. "Sorry!?" I ask, infuriated. "You're sorry?"

"Yea, what more do you want?"

It takes all my restraint not to hit him right then and there. Before I can reply John and Teyla come walking in. They walk towards us and John must've seen my fury because he asks, "Is there a problem?"

"That's the understatement of the year." I think to myself.

"No sir." Stackhouse replies.

I let out a snort of disgust. Excuse me? I think there is.

John raises an eyebrow, "Max?"

"Yes there is a problem." I say, forcefully while glaring at Stackhouse. This needs to stop right here and now. "Jason said the most interesting word today and said that he heard it from you and the other soldiers."

"What word?" John asks, eyebrows knitting together in confusion.

"Fuck." I simply say. "And then Stackhouse and a bunch of Marines come jogging past singing about the disembowelment of a paratrooper. So yea, there is a problem."

John clears his throat nervously while Teyla shoots him a look that says 'you're-gonna-be-sleeping-on-the-couch-for-a-while'.

Busted.

I inwardly smile as John stammers to say that he'll deal with Stackhouse and the other Marines and how it'll never happen again.

----

"I can't believe that Doctor Weir made Colonel Sheppard and the Marines have a teddy bear picnic with the kids." Crysta said, laughing when I told her about the entire incident.

I smile and say, "It was funny. The Marines and John had to have their own teddy bears and read Paddington stories to the kids. The boys weren't so hot about the bears but the girls loved them. Plenty of blackmail materal."

Crysta giggles at the remark and I spend the next half-hour telling her about the picnic. Through out it I can't help but think they learned that you never want to piss off a teacher. We can be vicious when we want to.

A/N: This chapter has been brought to you by The Creeping Spleen, who gave me the bunny for it. The lyrics are from an actual song, it's called "Blood Upon the Risers", and is about a rookie paratrooper's 'chute failing to open and he ends up falling to Earth with a resounding and rather messy splat. Lovely huh? Standard disclaimers apply, Review.