This is NOT a MST!
Warnings!: Okay, guys. Because there are so many wacky, and sometimes just plain cracked up pairings, out there in the Naruto fanfiction universe, I've taken it to the next level and decided to take a fun poke at all of them! I mean no harm to anyone who ships a certain pairing, nor am I here to insult anyone. I'm simply taking all the Naruto characters and their respective pairings, putting their personalities into the stories and making them react as they really would. If you are going to be oversensitive and overprotective about your pairing and you know that you will flame me to death, please don't read! This is only for fun and nothing else!
A/N: Geez, this one is just random! I wish I could promise you guys better plotlines that make more sense, but I'm kind of out of ideas… Fear not! The next one should be better! I bet half of you guys are dead and tired of reading my crappy stuff! Sorry!
Anything in bold from now on will be the character's true personality and their own words and thoughts. I only forced them into these situations, so have fun seeing how they react to my script!
Also, whenever they seem to be talking to you, as in referring to the story/ script, they are actually insulting me, the plot creator.
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Sand swirled around a pair of still feet. A dark shadow cooled the ground from the mid-afternoon's sun. "Konoha…" How did I get here? I was still in Suna three seconds ago… Freaky.
"Okay! If I can't do a thousand sit ups, then I'll kick the log five thousand times! Yosh!" A blur of green could be seen on the ground. Lee was practicing his taijutsu again with his self implied rules. Yes, good practice! But why am I here again?
A small rustle in the leaves made Lee stop from his practice. "Huh?"
Two green eyes glowed ominously from the depths of the leaves. My eyes are dry…
"Gaara?" Lee stood up and walked closer to the spot where Gaara was standing. "What are you doing here in Konoha?" Uh… Even I don't know why I'm here, though…
You're asking me? "I came to visit," he said lowly, his arms crossed, like usual. Really, now?
"Where's Kankuro and Temari then? Are they here as well?" Lee wiped his forehead and stood there, looking at the half-hidden boy. Wah… Come out already, you look creepier than usual…
What do you mean 'than usual'?! "They're not here," the boy said flatly and stepped out of the leaves, his head tilted down.
"Why not?" I didn't mean that! Don't look at me with such scary eyes!
"They're busy at Suna," the redhead looked up with seemingly cold and uncaring eyes. What a lie…
Lee smiled brightly. In fact, he smiled so brightly even a small 'pang' could be heard. "I see! Well, maybe I should take you around Konoha! I bet you didn't have time to explore the place the last time you were here!" Yeah, you were too busy helping us out and stuff, huh?
"Hmm…" So… what am I doing here again?
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"There's the Hokage's building. You can see it easily from here! Hey, Gaara, are you hungry?" Haha… I don't know why I'm escorting him through here like a guest…
"Not really," Gaara looked around distastefully. I'm being forced to go around here with this guy? Why?
"Hey, I know!" Lee grinned and grabbed Gaara's hand. "It's hot today, right?"
It's summer, what do you think? Gaara nodded uncertainly, still being dragged around.
"It's perfect weather…" they turned a corner quickly. Lee looked around, paused then ran again, still pulling the red head around the place. Hmm… What am I looking for again?
"Where are you taking me?" Gaara asked, irritated. I hate being dragged around like this…
The boy stopped abruptly, nearly causing Gaara to run into him. "Here we are!" Where are we?
"Huh?"
"Hmm… I'll take the strawberry flavored one, please!" Lee smiled and ordered the item happily. Waait… Am I going to have to pay for this? He turned around and looked at Gaara. "What about you?"
"Uh…" Gaara blinked and gaped at him. I don't even know what we're buying…
"Uhm… Okay, we'll take two strawberries, then!" he told the cashier and handed her some bills. "I hope you like strawberries, Gaara-kun!" I personally prefer kiwi but…
Aughh… "Sure…" he said uncertainly at Lee.
"Thanks!" Lee said with gratitude and took the two ice cream cones. "Come on, Gaara!" he said hastily, shoving one of the cones to the boy. But I wanted kiwi!
"Oh… Thank… you," Gaara said quietly, staring at the cold ice cream in his hand. Uh… What is this?
"Okay! Let's go!" Lee took a big bite out of his cone and strutted out of the shop, looking back momentarily to see if Gaara was following. He wasn't. What are you doing?
… My brother ate the script. I don't know what to do next… Green eyes looked up. For a moment, a flicker of loneliness and uncertainty passed by them but the look quickly went away and was replaced with a confused look again. He didn't know what to do.
A sweatdrop ran down Lee's face as he walked back over to the dumbfounded boy. "Ah… You seemed to be a little lost when I was bringing you around… Don't you know how to react right now?" Where's your memory of YOUTH?!
"I am not used to such hospitality," he said truthfully. Looking at the melting ice cream in his hands. Uh… Yeah, this is going to get so messy if that thing gets on my hands…
"Eat it."
"What?"
"The ice cream, silly! Eat it! It's going to melt!" Lee laughed at him and began biting his own cone, seeing that the heat was making it turn watery as well. Ow, brain freeze!
"Oh…" Gaara stuck his tongue out apprehensively and licked the dripping ice cream. This thing is too sweet…
"Come with me!" popping in the last of the cone into his mouth, Lee took Gaara's arm and tugged him away again, chuckling lightly all the while. This plotline… doesn't seem to make much sense…
Not again…
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"Doesn't Konoha look wonderful from up here?" Lee breathed in deeply and stared at the village below them. I want to sneeze right now…They were standing on top of the carved faces of the previous Hokages.
Gaara nodded absentmindedly. After staying with Lee for such a long time, he couldn't help but to think back to the Chuunin exams, when Gai had protected him from his sand out of love. My hand is sticky and I don't like it at all. "Lee… What is love?" Why am I asking this?
"Huh?" the boy turned around and stared at the redhead with a bewildered expression. Where's the dictionary when you need it…? "Well… Hmm… How should I put this?" Lee sat down, crossed leg, motioning Gaara to do the same.
He nodded and sat down as well, looking at Lee with expectant eyes. My eyes are still dry. Hey, you have an eyedropper or something?
"Okay… When someone loves another person, they… feel something… Hm… If you love someone you want to protect them forever. No matter what. Sometimes you'll fight with them and say you hate them, but deep in your heart, you don't!" Lee furrowed his eyebrows. "Is that too confusing?" I don't understand what I just said, but okay…
Huh? Gaara looked down at the stone between them. "It sounds so wonderful…" he pressed his hand against his chest, feeling his heartbeat. "What is it like to be loved by someone?"
Shouldn't you be asking someone else besides me? I'm just a random guy you fought for that other time… "It's… indescribable. It's like the Springtime of Youth! Fast and exciting, but strong and everlasting… Sometimes you can feel it physically, but sometimes you can't… And sometimes, it hurts… It hurts so badly…" his voice grew softer. Like that time when Sakura-chan rejected me…
Gaara looked up again. "I think I understand… I want to feel love… It hurts… It still hurts here…" he clutched at his shirt, gazing at Lee with ardent eyes. The wind isn't helping my dry eye symptoms…
"I think you should already feel it, Gaara…" Lee smiled lightly, leaning closer to him and taking his hand with his own. Somehow, this doesn't feel right at all…
"Lee?" Are you trying to molest me or something?
"I love you," 'even though you broke my arm and leg, nearly ruined my life as a shinobi, and almost killed me' "I love you, Gaara…" he repeated. Lee leaned in closer to the younger boy.
Gaara sat there, dumbfounded. What the heck is he doing?
Their lips were about to brush against each other when…
Sand erupted from Gaara's gourd, wrapping itself around Lee's arm and body, pulling him back.
"Desert Coffin! Look, I have no idea what is going to happen next since Kankuro so kindly devoured the script, but if my sand doesn't like it, I'm not going to allow it!"
"Waah, I have nothing to do with this, I swear! Let me go, Gaara!"
Why do all of my chapters end up this way…?