"Clarissa, wake up" I heard his voice close to my ear, soft and frightening. My eyes shot open from my sleep, immediately focusing on his face that pearled just through the rooms darkness. His stumble covered chin was messy and matched his crazy eyes, all held together with a toothy grin that revealed his sickening yellow teeth. "Look at you sunshine, a drunk just like your old man." he broke into a low laugh that held a bitter sense of pride. He was proud of the fact, he had obliterated my soul.
I sat up and reached for the light quickly, turning the lamp at my bedside on. It was a childish thing to do, something a five year old would do to banish the "bogeyman" . He was gone from the spot he had once been, vanishing with my sigh of relief. A childish fix to a trick of shadows.
"Over here honey" my head whipped to just beside me in the bed where he leaned over with his hands holding him above the mattress.
"How did you get in my house, how do you even know where I live? I jumped from the bed backing myself into the wall. I knew better than to run, he was faster, and it would only piss him off.
"Look at you playing grown up" he taunted avoiding my question. "Don't you want to be my little girl again?" , I stared at him in horror, because when I left, I thought this game had been over.
"I was never yours!" I stated clenching my jaw in a mix of fear and anger.
His amused image changed, he no longer wanted to play with me. He stood tall, moving back from the bed. I watched as he walked around the bed, keeping his eyes locked on me. I was cornered, there was no where to go. "You were always mine" he stood in front of me, so close I pushed against the wall to get away. So close I needed to turn my head to not suffocate against hi chest. "You will always be mine." he pledged, his thick breath reaching down to stain my neck with his disgusting stench. "Even when you wake up"
Suddenly i lay on my bed, tucked under the covers. The room was empty, the stench of liquor possibly my own, the light still off.
I've had these dreams since I was a child, just imagining leaving would bring these terrors. I always thought they would stop when I finally left, but they only got worse, feeding on my fears. It was like my life would always revolve around him, and my dreams told me I would see him again. "I will see you when you get home", the memory of his words rang through my mind, had he been delusional, or was it true that I would go back one day.
I stood up from my bed and walked to the door of my room but stopped short as I reached for the door knob. My hand was bandaged, both of them.
The memory's of Jace came at me with full force, how he had found me, took care of me and even tucked me into bed with care. I remembered he lips pressing to my forehead gently, so softly I almost didn't notice.
I found a shirt, pulling it over my body as I left the room, knowing full well that I probably looked terrible, but not caring anymore.
When I got to the door of my living room I saw him. the mess from last night had been cleaned, and Jace sat in the middle of my couch, his face buried in his hands.
It was moments like this that I saw something inside him that made me wonder if it was supposed to be me fixing him, but when I tried he always came out as a sort of savior to me. He was changing me, when all i could do was try to ease his pain.
This whole event had probably screwed everything up, he would probably be to disgusted my me to even want to be near me and him helping me this morning was noting more than pity.
"Jace?" I casually called into the silent room. He looked up from his hands, becoming stiff as his eyes met mine. "I'm so sorry, i didn't mean to lay all that on you lap like that. I had no intention what's so ever for it to go so far, I didn't want you to see that". his golden eyes just stared back at me, his hands fallen between his spread legs, dangling without a purpose. "I don't know why you didn't just turn around and walk out that door, I don't understand why you stayed, why you would help someone so, messed up." as soon as the words left my mouth i wished i could just grab for them.
I watched as Jace's face grew frustrated. glaring at me, he spoke "Clary, you just don't get it do you? Do you not understand what it is I'm trying to do? I want to do these things for you Clary, because that's what friends do. and you are in no way messed up, your just having a difficult time, i get that and I want to help, so just fucking let me" his voice was tired at the end, breaking his voice from its clear tone to a more raspy noise. I moved to sit with him, just beside him on the couch but staring distantly to the point where i could just see him from the corner of my eye. He stayed silent for a moment, taking a few deep breaths as his hands combed through his yellow locks. "I told you yesterday i wouldn't ask you, i said i would wait, but i have to know, was it your dad"
How could he possibly know? i hadn't told him anything, even if i owed it to him. I turned my head to him and met saddened orbs that only moments ago seemed irritated with me. He deserved better than the secrets i had kept, while he was opening himself up to me. "No, i never knew my dad."I fought against the lump that formed in my now dry throat "It was my stepfather, Luke".
A pained look flashed across his face, mixed with slight shock. "I'm sorry"
"There's nothing you can do to change the past Jace, so don't bear on it." I brushed off his pity filled words,
"Clary, I look at you and I see a mask of beauty and fear, but when I look through you, I see strength, independence and a fiery soul that would fight to the end."
"I'm not much of a fighter-" I interrupted him, trailing off as his glance silenced me.
"I wouldn't change anything about you, no matter how much I would want to take away your pain, its apart of you, its your past, your story. I'm just a child under the covers reading with an almost dead flashlight, but i wont put down the book till every page is red, or till I'm taken from it forcefully, till i can no longer fight against sleep."
"I didn't peg you as a reader"
"And i didn't peg you for much of a drinker, but i guess were both full of surprises." A smile crept across my face. I wondered when the last time i had smiled without Jace was, but i couldn't think of any other time i had smiled between Simon and Jace. Maybe Jace was already my friend, but thinking of him as a friend seemed almost, wrong, he was something else entirely to me, maybe something more. "I-" Jace was cut off by the ringing of his phone. He reached for it, answering it on the third ring.
"Hello?" , I watched as Jace's face grew shocked. "Dude, what's going on?" he listened intensively, nodding to himself in a way his hair flopped slightly. "Dinner? with you, your sister and your Husband? Your sister hates me!" his eyes flickered to me, watching for a reaction. "Are you sure shes willing to give me a chance, her fiance isn't some great big guy who is just trying to trap me and kill me for her?" he let out a sigh of breath, in relief. "Can i bring someone?". Jace looked at me and laughed, "Shes here if you wanna ask her?" My mouth fell, what the hell was i being dragged into now? he held the phone out to me.
"Hello?" i asked into the phone.
"Hey Clary, its Alec." He voice was calm and somewhat amused, but you could here his gentle personality behind his low tone.
"Hey Alec, how can i help you?" I knew pretty well what he wanted, and i wasn't thrilled, but i did like Alec and i would consider what he would ask.
"Well my sister has arranged to meet with Jace, to give him a chance and she also, would like to meet you."
"What's her interest in me? What does Jace need a chance for" Jace looked away staring off into the distance.
"Did Jace tell you what he did to me in high school, what are relationship was like then?"
"Ye,s he told me."
"Well Jace called me yesterday, while i was with my sister. She was rather angry that i was talking to him and i had to explain to her that he had apologized for his behavior as a child, i mentioned when he came by the bar yesterday, and of course i mentioned you. She wanted to meet you, and check Jace out"
"Well, she seems kinda protective", Jace snickered, and Alec burst out laughing.
"You have no idea. So what do you say Clary? Are you willing to save Jace, because i guaranty he will need some support, and i think your just the person to help." I nibbled on my bottom lip, drawing Jace's attention once again. he swallowed hard, with his eyes fixed on my lips.
"I guess i owe him that much"
Jace leaned into my opposite ear from the one i had the phone at and whispered, "I hope you not talking about me, because you don't me a thing", then reaching for the phone and taking it from my grasp. He moved away from me, but he seemed to be sitting closer then he had a moment ago.
"What time and where, Alec?" he asked somewhat determined. "alright, I'll see if we can grab a cab and meet you there, but make sure Izzy doesn't bring any weapons" he laughed a true smile on his face. "Alright man, I cant wait to meet this man you married." he hung up after a second and looked back at me, "We have an hour, Do you want me to leave while you get changed and stuff?"
"It's fine if you wanna stay, I wont be that long"
there was a question that was filling his image, it was a long moment before he asked, "Are you sure you want to go? You don't have to go if you don't". I watched him, remembering how Alec had told me Jace would need me. For some reason, the thought of him needing me, filled me with an unexplainable joy.
"Yes, I'm sure."

Me and Clary walked into a place called Taki's, it was a small simple place with a very small amount of people in it. My eyes fixed on a table that held a black haired woman whom had there back to me and two other men, one of them being Alec who faced us. Alec smiled when he caught my eyes, nodding to me. I mirrored his actions just as the dark haired woman turned in her seat.
Isabelle Lightwood had always been beautiful, you know the long legged dark haired type of girl who could get almost any guy who liked a girl with attitude. When i looked at her now, i saw a more matured, gorgeous woman whom didn't catch my attention sexually. For a second i had to wonder if I was still looking at the girl I had went to High School with, but sure enough it was her. Only Isabelle Lightwood could wear such deadly look on her face.
"Hello", I said as we walked over to the table, staying close to one another.
"Hey Jace, Clary, this is my husband Magnus and Isabelle my sister, as you know Jace."
The man Alec had motioned to had dark hair that was wild with strands that spiked out. He wore a pair of skinny black pants that were torn and splattered with white paint. His shirt was a white button up that he had pushed the cuffs up to his elbows in a messy fashion. He was smiling up at me with cat like greenish yellow eyes. he reached out a hand to me, I took it and shook it as he spoke "Jace Wayland, I've heard quite a bit about you" then he moved his eyes to Clary, taking his hand back and moving it towards her, "The same for you Miss. Fray, I'm a huge fan of you work by the way"
"Thank you, its nice to meet you" she responded as Magnus took his hand back.
"likewise! Now why don't the both of you take a seat before my neck starts to hurt from staring up at you!" it wasn't a question. Me and Clary met eyes for the first time since we had walked in, she nodded to me and sat down in an empty seat beside Isabelle, I hopped in the empty seat beside her that was also next to Alec.
"so Jace" Isabelle's voice broke into the silent air for the first time. "What have you been up to these last few years". I had hoped she would start with Clary because she at least didn't have any reason to hate Clary.
"Well i did a few years of ultimate fighting, but quit last year, now I'm just rolling with the punches."
"Why did you quit?" She narrowed her eyes at me like i did something immensely stupid.
"My uncle died" i spoke emotionless, trying to hide the surge of regret icing my eyes. I felt what i guessed Clary's hand grip my wrist out of view from the others, my eyes flickered to Clary who was looking at Isabelle. It almost looked like Clary was challenging her.
"I'm sorry i had no idea" Isabelle just kept staring at me, not even noticing Clary.
"So Isabelle, How long have you been engaged?"
"A month now, and please Jace try not to be jealous."
"Why would i be jealous?" Its not like i ever had a thing for her, sure i hit on her in high school, but she never interested me that way. However no matter how much pull I had back then, it was never enough for her, she always thought of her brother before anyone else. No, I never had had a thing for her, but I did admire how caring she was, even if she tried to hide it.
"Because you always did like what you couldn't have." Clary tensed a bit and i moved my wrist away from her hand, grabbing it in my own. Trying to comfort her through whatever thought she may have had.
"People change after High School, Izzy."
"Not everyone can Jace" she snickered to herself and turned to Clary. "So your Clary Fray?" Isabelle seemed to have a odd interest that told me Alec had told her about Clary. I was caught wondering if Alec had told her about what he know about Clary, and that he thought she had been abused as a child.
"Yes" I could hear how casual she was acting, I hadn't heard her talk like this since the night i met her. This is how she acts when shes learning about people, it hadn't really accrued to me that she was a judgmental person, but I could see that maybe it was a way of protecting herself. A way of hiding from danger. Wow that sounds cheesy, I really need to learn how to filter my thoughts!
"Its nice to meet you, sorry if I'm being a bitch Jace has always brought out that side of me." a light smile playing on Izzy's lips.
"I know the feeling" She laughed as i looked at her, I felt slightly shocked at her acceptance. How often was it that
"Ouch, since when do you have the power to be unkind Fray?" I chuckled at her, amused with her response.
"Must have happened when I met you. Don't like it, deal with it, its not like i can get rid of you anyway" She was now looking down at her menu, reading as she talked.
"You will get your chance, but we both know you wont want too?" I responded with a smirk.
"Jace if people could get rid of you, I'm sure you would be one lonely guy." Alec added into the conversation, enjoying the treatment i was getting.
"That's not fair Alexander, I'm sure Jace could find someone to accompany him" Magnus said, and i notice he was looking just beside me, at Clary with this knowing glint in his eyes. When i looked over at her she had her eyes level with him. "Don't you think Clary?"
"I'm sure we could find someone he hasn't pissed off, most likely someone who is both blind and death."
"I don't think that would work, Jace would probably end up hurting them physically, or he would forget them on a bus or something" Izzy said
"Lets attack someone else for a change, how does that sound?" Everyone was silent, waiting for a chance to pounce but i was ready. "So Izzy, wheres you loving fiance tonight? What could possibly be more important than meeting me?"
"Simon has some family stuff in town, we came to New York so he can see his mother. But I don't really like her, so I thought i could kill some time with my Big brother, his Husband and his old tormenter who now seems to be his friend now, not to mention this interesting red head" she indicated to Clary with a smile.
"Its not very nice to leave Simon with that woman, I heard she is one scary beast." Magnus chuckled as the waitress came and went, bringing us each a glass of water
"Shes really into her religion, apparently I'm wrong for her son because I'm not Jewish?"
" You sure its not your attitude?" Alec joked, "Your voice isn't really all that pleasant to listen to sometimes" she glared at Alec and i heard Clary stiffen a laugh beside me. I squeezed her hand in mine and smirked.
"I will remember that one later" she said as she sipped her water, continuing to glare over her glass. when she set the glass down she looked back at Clary, "So your an artist?",
"Yeah"
a fucking brilliant one at that! I reached down and picked up my water sipping it. I looked up and found everyone staring at me.
Did I say that out loud?

Well that was probably a mistake!

Who pity's Jace right now?

So i want all the feed back, good or bad. Questions, what ever you guys have to say, anything, i can take it i swear!

-The Black Tattoo

XD