A/N: SO the wedding was good, it just took me a while to recoup after all the stress and physical activity, my body kind of rebelled. I was also viding, (because it's easier than writing when in pain.) So that takes up a lot of time too. I'm really sorry that it took so long to update though. I hope this long ass update will appease you. :D (it's 10 pages in Microsoft word!) I own grape hookah, 7 televisions, and braces/casts for nearly every joint in my body. I do NOT own any of the characters or lyrics in this story! Enjoy guys. : )
Three weeks after Jay's deployment Erin wakes up with a start, heart racing. Trying to orient herself she sits up slowly. She dreamt of Jay, again. She dreamt of him in a way that made her ache. She could still feel the heat of his hands on her body, even though they had never physically been where she was dreaming of them being. She would give anything to touch him right now, even if it was just a hug.
Thankfully she had heard from him about a week from the day he flew out, it was short but he wanted to let her know that he was going into his first mission, it eased her nerves a bit at the time, but now that it had been two weeks since she's heard from him, her nerves were starting to grate.
Erin looks at the clock and sighs. She has almost two hours before she has to be at work, so she decides to take her time getting ready. She slowly gets out of bed and stands, putting her hands over her head and stretching out the vertebrae in her spine. She shuffles out to her kitchen and pours herself a hot cup of coffee, hoping it will perk her up a bit. She walks back to her bedroom and sits down on her desk chair, cradling her cup of coffee in her hands as she boots up her computer to check her email. Since Jay had left she had an obsessive habit of checking her email a little too frequently. She opens up her email and her heart sinks when she see's that she doesn't have any new emails. She logs on to Skype and see's once again that he isn't online. She leaves her skype signed on anyways, just in case. She's worried and that makes her cranky, she hates letting people in this much, she hates caring this much because it breaks her heart.
Deciding that she should start getting ready for work she goes to the bathroom to start up the shower and she puts her phone on her docking station, queuing up a playlist to listen to while she gets ready. She hopes that some sort of music will lift her mood, let her escape her thoughts and worries for a while. It's Friday after all, she just has to make it through the day.
'Do I wanna know?' by the Arctic Monkey's pours through her speakers. The beat automatically makes Erin want to move, so as she strips off her pajamas she dances around to the song, swinging her hips to the beat.
'Have you got colour in your cheeks?
Do you ever get that fear that you can't shift
The type that sticks around like something in your teeth?
Are there some aces up your sleeve?
Have you no idea that you're in deep?
I dreamt about you nearly every night this week
How many secrets can you keep?
'Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow and I play it on repeat
Until I fall asleep'
She steps under the hot spray and lets the water and the music wash over her;
'Ever thought of calling when you've had a few?
'Cause I always do
Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new
Now I've thought it through'
Zoning out and enjoying the hot water and several songs that follow, she realizes that she lost track of time. She quickly washes her body and decides rather than washing her hair; she'll just pull it up into a ponytail.
Erin finishes up quickly and jumps out of the shower. She pulls on a pair of her favorite jeans and a light purple quarter sleeve shirt. She grabs her bag, her phone, and quickly pours another cup of coffee into a travel mug, planning on savoring it throughout her Friday. She grabs her bag and heads out the door.
Erin is walking up the stairs to the intelligence unit when she runs into Adam.
"Hey Lindsay, how's it going?" Ruzek asks.
"Ah" Erin starts, "let's just say I'm glad it's Friday. " She says with a small smile.
"Well perk up, " Ruzek says as he claps her on the back. "We're working together today, partner."
'You aren't my partner' flashes through her mind, but she plasters on a smile and gives him a nod, "Sounds good."
Adam heads over to his desk to boot up his computer and instead of doing the same she goes and leans against Jay's desk. She has been sitting there occasionally just because she wants to. At first everyone kept asking her why but after her snapping at them a few times, no one bothers to ask anymore.
They all listen as Voight discusses the leads they have on Harry Vizor, who has been smuggling underage girls for the purpose of child prostitution and pornography. 'Piece of shit' Erin thinks to herself and grinds her teeth.
Once Voight is done briefing everyone Erin asks him if she can speak to him for a second.
"So I was thinking back to when Antonio was on desk duty when he was recovering, right?" she starts
"He had tons of messages and said that we needed someone screening calls and taking messages. So I was thinking maybe we can bring Nadia in. She's been clean for a while and she could use a chance, minimum wage is fine, she just needs help getting back on her feet. She needs this, like I needed you." She says sincerely.
Voight gives a little smile, "I have to talk to Perry about it, but I'm sure it wouldn't be a problem. I agree, she helped us big on that hooker case and I think you're right about getting someone in here to field calls. I can probably make it happen by next week, how does that sound?" he asks.
"That would be great." She pulls him into a hug, "Thank you so much Hank." She whispers to him, thanking him not only for this, but for everything.
"No problem, kid. " he says, pinching her cheek.
She chuckles and walks to her desk to clip her badge to her belt and settle her gun in its holster. She calls out, "Ruzek, lets go!" and starts walking down the stairs of the unit.
"Yes, Ma'am." He says running to catch up with her.
"I'm driving." She says matter-of-factly when he catches up with her.
Adam chuckles, "Of course you are."
Later in the afternoon, Adam and Erin pull up outside of a local run down restaurant where Vizor usually hangs. Sure enough there is a group of people standing around out front.
Pulling out the picture, she leans closer to Adam showing him, "What do you think?" she asks, looking at the group of guys.
"I don't see him." Adam says.
They sit for a minute scanning faces, and then Erin smirks, "I see him." She says pointing to the door that he just walked out of.
"Lets go." Adam says opening his door, "Double team him?" he asks Erin.
She nods and Adam heads in the direct of the group of people while she hangs behind.
"Hey buddy," Adam says casually to Vizor. "Are you Harry?"
"Uh yeah…" Harry replies, clearly confused because he doesn't recognize Adam.
"My buddy told me about your…business." Adams voice drops to a whisper.
"Oh, oh okay. You interested?" Vizor asks him.
"Yeah definitely, nothing too old though." Adam points to the alley close to the store, "Wanna come over here and we can sort things out in private?"
Vizor nods and follows Adam toward the ally. Once they round the wall, Adam positions his body close to Vizor, essentially giving him little space to move.
"So how do you wanna do this?" Vizor asks.
"Well," Erin says at the mouth of the alley, "For starters, why don't we take this business downtown? You're under arrest. And don't even think of running, I'm not in the mood."
"Sonofa-" Vizor says before Erin pushes her elbow into his back and turns his body against the wall. She grabs his right arm, trying to handcuff him. Instead, he lifts his left arm and elbows erin in the eye, catching her off guard making her grab her head and bend down. Adam reaches for him but Vizor maneuvers around him, grabs erin by the hair and throws her against the wall. Then he runs.
Adam bends to check on Erin.
"What are you doing?" she yells at him, "Go!"
Adam takes off running and Erin takes her time getting up off the ground, clutching her head.
"Damn it!" She says aloud and kicks a trashcan near her.
Just then Adam comes walking down the alley with Vizor in handcuffs. When they reach Erin, she grabs Vizor's arm forcefully and pushes him toward the car, throwing Adam a glare.
Once she throws Vizor in the back of her car, she slams the door and turns on Adam.
"What the hell was that?" She spits out. "You don't stop to check, you run after the suspect, there's two of us for a reason, Ruzek!" She says.
"He got you pretty bad, I just thought-"Erin cuts him off mid-sentence.
"Don't. Don't think. Just apprehend the suspect. You should have had my back to begin with; he shouldn't have been able to get a jump on me. This wouldn't have happened if my partner was here." She says harshly.
Adam sets his jaw and takes a deep breath. "Let's just get this scum back to the station."
Realizing she hurt Adam, Erin looks away and huffs out a breath before nodding and rounding the car to the driver's side.
Once she starts the car, she switches on the radio and lets some music flow through the car, trying to relax. After driving for a few minutes, Ruzek turns his head to stare at her.
Feeling his eyes on her she turns toward him, "What?" she asks sharply.
"You know Erin," Adam says a bit harshly, "We miss him too."
Erin's mouth hangs open for a minute, before she turns away from him. Tears prick the back of her eyes and she doesn't want Adam to see. Her hand instinctively reaches for her locket before she clears her throat.
"Yeah, I know." She says softly.
Back at the station they hand Vizor over to Olinksi, Voight, and Dawson for interrogation. She and Adam silently sit at their desks, typing up their reports on the case. Atwater and Burgess head up the stairs to the unit and both head to their desks, "What's going on guys?" Atwater asks the two.
Neither of them answer, and Kim and Atwater look at each other and then at them. Atwater lifts his eyebrows and asks, "Trouble in partner paradise?"
"No," Erin answers quickly. "I just owe Ruzek an apology."
Kim looks at Adam and he smiles and nods at her. Kim taps Kevin on the shoulder, "Let's go grab our stuff from our lockers." She says, throwing a wink at Erin.
Erin takes a deep breath and heads over to Adam's desk.
" I really am sorry I lost it on you, as you obviously know, it wasn't really about you."
"It's okay Lindsay, I get it." Adam says empathetically. "Apparently he's my pen pal, I heard from him when he got over there. How long has it been since you've heard from him?"
Erin's hand clenches, along with her heart, "It's been about two weeks. I'm worried, Adam."
"I know, it's understandable. He's your partner." He says, stressing the word partner.
"Yeah, yeah he is." She says solemnly.
"Tell you what," he says, "Why don't we grab Kim and Kevin and we can all go for coffee, de-stress you know? You can buy mine." Adam says with a smirk.
Erin lets out a laugh. "That sounds like a deal."
After grabbing some coffees, the group sits down at a table facing the window.
They settle into a conversation about their days, and the subject lands on Vizor.
While Adam is talking about what happened during the takedown, Erin winces in pain and Kim notices.
"Yeah that looks pretty nasty," Kim says to Erin before taking a sip of her vanilla chia latte.
"It doesn't feel very great either," Erin says cradling her pounding head in her hands.
Kim gives her an empathetic look and Erin looks back to Kevin, who is talking about the case that he and Kim worked today, something about a kid that was involved in dealing coke.
Erin feels a wave of nausea, and grips her cup of coffee a bit tighter, still trying to listen to Kevin. She takes a long drink, hoping that her stomach is just iffy because she hasn't eaten today.
Her head continues to pound more, and she decides that maybe she needs go splash some cold water on her face.
"You okay?" Kim asks, noticing Erin's pale complexion.
"Yeah, I'm fine I just need to go powder my face." She says somewhat sarcastically.
She stands up slowly, hoping her head will stop throbbing once she gets up and moves around.
"You want me to come?" Kim asks her, voice somewhat distorted. Erin's vision tunnels.
She shakes her head, willing it to go away.
"I'm coming anyway," Kim says, starting to stand up. It sounds like she's so far away.
Erin grips her head, and as she goes to follow Kim, the ground rushes up toward her and everything goes black.
Kim is sitting next to Erin's bed in the Emergency Room with Adam right behind her when Voight violently pulls the curtain back.
"What the hell happened?" He says directing the question at both Adam and Kim.
Adam fills him in on earlier events and what they know so far from the doctors.
"The doctor should be back soon." Adam finishes.
Voight walks over to Erin's bed, and gently runs his hand over her cheek. "You better be okay kid."
Erin groans, trying to orient herself. She remembers bits and pieces of collapsing, of waking up in the ambulance, of the doctors giving her meds and being in and out of sleep. She remembers being pissed because Adam and Kim kept waking her up every 10 minutes, little did she know they had been instructed to.
"I'll be okay, I promise." She says softly, eyes still closed.
Just then the doctor pulls the curtain back and then pulls it closed behind her. Erin opens her eyes and squints before opening them fully.
"Wow, busy room. " She says. "Are you all family?" she asks them all.
"Yes." They all answer in unison, making Erin smile softly.
"So detective, your CT scan came back, it didn't show any kind of brain bleed, but you definitely have a moderate concussion."
"Okay so what does that mean?" she asks, knowing probably a few days off work.
"It means a pretty bad headache for about a week, and those bruises will be very sore for a few days. I'd also like to keep you overnight, just for observation."
"No." Erin answers immediately.
"Erin…" Voight says concerned.
The doctor interjects, "She doesn't have to. But if she doesn't stay, she definitely has to have someone with her, waking her up every hour and checking on her."
"I will" Kim says willingly, looking towards Erin. "It'll be fun, we'll have a sleepover."
"Sounds great." Erin says, just wanting to get out of this hospital.
The doctor gives her scripts for pain medication, gives her instructions to be off work for 3 days, and tells her to come back if there are any changes. "You just need to sign these discharge papers and you're free to go." She says handing Erin the papers. Erin signs them quickly and looks around making sure there isn't anything left behind.
"You gonna take her home?" Voight asks Kim.
"You bet," she says, "We'll stop at the pharmacy and fill her prescriptions and grab an ice pack and then head home." She smiles at Erin.
"Okay, please call me in the morning." He commands Erin.
"I will, I promise." She says as he pulls her in for a hug. "Don't worry I'm fine." She says as they walk out of the doors of the ER.
"I can't promise anything, kid." He says giving her a wave before heading toward his car.
Kim laces her arm through Erin's, with Adam right behind her. "Come on, let's go have a slumber party."
Erin is sitting on her couch; head pillowed on Kim's lap, watching the food network with an Icepack over half of her face when she hears a knock at the door.
"I'll get it," Kim says lifting Erin's head off her lap and Erin sits up before slowly getting to her feet, if anything just to stretch her legs.
Kim walks over to the door and looks through the peep hole before she smiles and opens the door. Inviting the guest in.
"Hey, look what I found." Kim says as they walk down the hallway into the living room.
"Nadia!" Erin exclaims as Nadia drops the bags she has in her hands to go and give Erin a hug.
"Holy shit, look at you." Nadia says, examining Erin's face.
"I know, it looks really bad." Erin says, "But these pain pills are the bomb." She giggles.
"Hey, how did you know?" Kim asks Nadia curiously.
"Oh apparently Antonio and Voight were interrogating some scumbag when Voight got the call about you. " She motions to Erin. "Voight apparently called Tony as he was leaving and he texted me, told me to dress in my PJ's and head over to Erins, so I did."
"Tony huh?" Kim teases.
"Oh shut up. There's nothing going on." Nadia whines as Erin and Kim give each other a look and giggle.
"Anyways," Nadia says, trying to change the subject. "Other than myself, I brought chips, and ice cream and soda, I figured maybe we could make ice cream floats and be fat. I also brought this." She holds up a copy of Die Hard.
"YES!" Erin exclaims, a little excited from the drugs, "Die Hard is literally my favorite."
"Let's get into our 'jammies" Kim says to Erin.
"Let's" Erin says, feeling the effect of her pain killers.
She walks back to her room with Kim on her heels. Nadia follows them after putting the ice cream in the freezer.
Nadia climbs onto Erin's bed and gets comfortable. Erin strips off her work clothes, wrinkling her nose because they smell like hospital. "These smell like hospital." She says aloud making Kim and Nadia giggle. She walks over to her pajama drawer and pulls out a pair of loose pajama pants and a tank for Kim and throws them at her. She grabs a pair of boxer type shorts and Jay's T-shirt and pulls them on. Kim strips off her clothes as well and pulls on the pants Erin had handed her, watching them pool at her feet because of the height difference between her and Erin.
"I'm gonna pee and then we can make floats and watch the movie." She says lightheartedly.
She makes her way to the bathroom and closes the door behind her. She looks at the damage to her face when she sees her reflection. She swears she hears ringing, but she chalks it up to the pain killers and sits to use the bathroom. Halfway through peeing she hears a pounding on the door. "Uh yeah? I'm peeing." Erin say's sassily.
"Erin," Kim says through the door. "Your Skype was ringing, I answered it." Erin feels her heart skip. She didn't have to ask who it was that was calling her. She instinctively reaches for her locket and smiles.
"Okay, I'll be right out." She says, giddy. She looks in the mirror and swears to herself, sobering up a bit. Thinking remarkably quickly, she throws on the hoodie hanging on the back of the bathroom door. She pulls her hair out of the ponytail and lets it cascade around her face, trying to hide some of the bruises. She pulls the hood over her hair, hoping it will conceal at least some of the bruises.
Kim and Nadia are sitting at her computer, and Erin takes a shaky breath as she see's Jay's face on her computer.
She walks over slowly and stands behind them, hiding the bad part of her face behind Kim's hair.
Jay see's her and he smiles, making Erin's eyes water as she smiles back.
"Hey Partner." Jay says, smirking.
"Hi Partner." Erin repeats, letting a few tears fall.
"We'll leave you alone." Kim says, jumping up and grabbing Nadia. "Bye Halstead!" Kim says enthusiastically.
Erin sits, adjusting the angle of her webcam and the angle of her face, while Jay is distracted.
"Bye Kim, Bye Nadia" he says with a chuckle.
"So I hear you guys are having a slumber party." Jay says, "I was disappointed to see you were not all in your underwear."
Erin chuckles, "Sorry to disappoint, maybe next time." She says with a wink.
Jay laughs, and smiles, fidgeting once again. This time he notices.
"Erin what are you doing?" he asks curiously, slightly amused.
"Oh, nothing." She says, re-positioning her camera again.
"Are you hiding something?" he asks. "Erin…"
"It's nothing," She says awkwardly.
"Erin look at me." He says with a bit of force. "Come on, it's me."
Sighing, she lets the hood fall off her head, and she turns the camera to show her whole face.
"Son of a bitch, what happened? Are you okay? Why didn't anyone have your back?" He asks, frustrated, jaw set, teeth clenched.
"Jay, I promise, I'm okay. Scumbag got the drop on me, thought it was just some bruises and a headache until it got worse and I passed out." She says, deciding to just tell him everything.
"You passed out?" he says, shocked. "Who the hell was supposed to be having your back? I'll kill him."
Erin chuckles, "My hero." She says, trying to get him to calm down. "It doesn't matter, I'm fine now and I have my girls spending the night to keep an eye on me. I also have these really good pain pills, so they are definitely helping."
"Alright," he says, defeated. "I just worry about you, I'm supposed to be there having your back, making sure that you're okay. "He admits.
" I know. You don't know how much I wish you were here right now. You make a good pillow." She says, making him laugh again.
"So if you aren't having semi-nude pillow fights, what are you guys going to do tonight?"
"We're going to make ice cream floats and watch Die Hard." Erin says with a smile.
"That's you're favorite." Jay says with a smirk. It makes Erin's heart skip, knowing that he knows her so well.
"Yeah it is. You're my favorite too though. "She says, fiddling with her locket and smiling when he gives her a wide grin. They just look at each other for a minute before his grin falls a bit.
"God, I really miss you." He says, voice breaking.
She swallows hard, willing the lump in her throat to go away before she nods, "I miss you too. So much." She says biting her quivering bottom lip as her eyes well up again.
"Is it bad?" she asks delicately.
He looks away and sighs before he answers. "Yeah it's bad. We lost two guys on this last mission." He says before he takes a deep breath. "The nightmares are killing me though."
Erin sighs and looks at him sympathetically, "I wish I could help. At least be able to be there for you when you wake up screaming." She says, remember the times that he had slept on her couch and she had woken up to screams.
"I'll be okay. Don't worry." He says reassuringly.
Erin brushes away the tears on her cheeks. "Yeah you better be. I want you coming home in one piece."
"I will come home in one piece" he says confidently. "Are you going to drive when I get home?" he looks at her with a surprising amount of sass on his face which makes her smile wide.
"Yeah" She says, very aware of the double entendre. "Yeah I'm going to let you drive."
A/N: AHHHHH yayayayay they got to look at eachothers faces! I hope that went okay, it's really hard to write about a video chat?! So I did my best. There will more than likely be a significant time jump in the next chapter so be aware. Also *hint hint* remember that this is not a story filled with puppy dogs and rainbows. Also may have to change the rating to M for later chapters *wink wink*. Please favorite/ and review review review. The more reviews I get, the more inspired I get. Will update way sooner because I have a LOOOOT of ideas. :3