Apov
Somehow Christian was able to get me a doctor appointment the next morning, before the Coping Together charity, so he could come with me. I was nervous filling out the paperwork, but Christian assured me everything would be okay so I filled everything out as Anastasia Steele. After my exam, and an ultrasound, Dr. Greene confirmed that the test results were correct and I am pregnant. We'll have a baby come January. We left the office with our first ultrasound photos of our baby, both agreeing to wait until tomorrow, after the charity event, before we tell his family. However, I did tell Christian that Kate was with me when I took the test and it was obvious what those results were.
After my appointment, we picked up Teddy from Kate and Elliot then we came back to Escala. Before we left, Kate privately confirmed that her parents would watch the children so I could attend the event. Kate went on to ask if I was still getting a dress, but since I've been nauseous I'm not going to go. So it'll just be Teddy and I at home tonight since Ava will stay with her grandparents.
Christian and I still need to talk, discuss everything about what having this baby means for our future. However, it's not a conversation to be had with Teddy around.
Laying down seems to help my nausea so we're in the family room, watching a movie. Teddy and I are already in our pajamas, ready for bed when the time comes. Christian still needs to get ready for Coping Together, but he is holding off for as long as he possibly can. I know he's torn between going and staying with us, but I think he should go if he goes every year. I can go the following years, as long as it's still masquerade themed.
It's nearing 8 o'clock, almost time for Christian to leave and Teddy to be sleeping. I'm a little tired myself, this pregnancy, though still in the early stages, is taking it's toll on me and my body. I'm sure going to the event with Christian would've made him happy, but I'm kind of glad I'll be staying home. I'm tired and nauseous, not a good combination.
"Baby," Christian calls my attention so I look up since I'm snuggled next to him. "I think we should tell him." He nods towards Teddy.
"Now?"
"I'd like for him to know before we tell everyone tomorrow and he overhears us or them."
I'm not really sure how to tell anyone about this unexpected, unplanned pregnancy, but I don't think Teddy should overhear it.
"Makes sense." I nod in agreement and sit up.
Christian moves so he's sitting on the other side of Teddy so that way Teddy is in between us. I let Christian take the lead because I don't really know what to say.
"Hey, buddy," Christian begins. "Ana and I want to talk to you about something. Something important."
"What?"
"Well, you like Ana right?"
"Yes, I wike her a wot." He holds his arms wide, showing us how much. "Dis much!"
I have to hold back my giggles at how cute he is, but it doesn't stop my wide smile.
"I like Ana, too." Christian grins at his son and winks at me. "I like her so much that I want her to be my girlfriend."
"I thought she awready was?"
"Well," Christian looks up at me before turning his attention back towards his son.
We've never really made it official, everyone refers to us as a couple and yesterday Elliot called us Teddy's 'parents'. Parents, as in plural. At the time I was so tired, exhausted, that I didn't even realize it until I woke up from my nap. It just sounded so natural and nobody said anything, correcting him or otherwise. I almost expected Teddy to be the next one to slip and call me mommy or something.
"Yes," Christian brings me from my thoughts, answering Teddy, "but I want to be with Ana forever."
I'm literally swooning from the words he's saying to his four year old son. Our four year old son. We really need to talk privately.
"Does dat mean Ana-" Teddy stops to think of his words. "Is she-"
"What is it, buddy?" Christian encourages him to continue.
"Will Ana be my mommy?" His tone is soft, almost sad, like he's expecting us to tell him no.
"Yes." My eyes widen as I realize I'm the one who blurted it out, but Christian nods his head when he sees my reaction, letting me know it's okay.
"I may not have given birth to you, Teddy," I tell him honestly, even though I know he probably doesn't understand what that means, "but I would love to be your mom."
Teddy's smile could light up the city.
He launches himself at me so I hug the little guy and melt even more when he says, "I love you, mommy!"
"I love you, too." I can't manage more than a whisper.
He is the first to pull away from our hug, but we're all still smiling.
"Now I can tell Ava dat I have a mommy and a daddy, just like her!"
"Well, you are going to have something else too," Christian chimes in. "Because your new mommy is going to have a baby."
"Rweally?!" Teddy seems thrilled with the idea. "Ava doesn't have a baby."
"No, she doesn't." Christian laughs as he agrees.
"I hope I get a broder, I always wanted a broder like daddy and uncle Lelliot. Oh man, dis is gonna be so cool!"
Teddy starts going on and on about how he and his brother -that he assumes will be ready to play once he is born- are going to do all kinds of activities together like Christian and Elliot.
I'm so happy that he's okay with this. I am somewhat of a new person to him, only knowing the Greys for a couple months. Though Teddy and I have always had this special little bond and I'm not entirely sure why. He's the one that sort of helped me get out of my shell, and if being a mother to him is a way to repay him, I'll gladly accept.
"It may be a girl, Teddy," Christian kills the joy of Teddy's possible new brother. "We'll be happy with a brother or a sister, right?"
"Rwight. Ava will be happier, doh. But, and I can potect dem."
"There ya go." Christian ruffles his hair. "I'm glad you're happy about having a new sibling, buddy."
Christian glances at his watch and frowns.
"I have to get ready," Christian tells us, standing from the sofa.
He gives me a soft kiss on my lips and kisses Teddy's head before he heads towards the bedroom to get dressed for the charity event his parents are hosting.
I'm a little sad that I wont be joining him, but maybe one year I'll be comfortable enough to join him without the masks needed to conceal my identity.
Teddy and I snuggle together again with smiles on our faces as we start another movie. Bolt, this time. I'm sure he'll be sleeping before it's halfway over but I'm enjoying his company and I don't want him to leave my side just yet. I'm still high off of gaining a son, possible two sons, in less than 24 hours. Christian and I will talk more about everything tonight when he gets home.
...
Cpov
I've just arrived at my parents' Bellevue property for the Coping Together charity event. As I walk the line of photographers here to capture photos of the guests attending, instead of my usual impassive face I'm scowling at them. It's mainly their fault Ana couldn't join me here tonight.
It has me wondering if she will always avoid these types of events because of the fear that the paps will blast our photo in the magazines, internet and other news media sources. I'm not nearly as popular as I was before, but I am still very well known and I still get plenty of invites to charity events with a lot of photographers.
It's definitely something we need to discuss; our future together.
Once I make my way towards the back, I grab a flute of champagne and walk towards the tent, since it's nearly time to be seated for dinner. I waited until the last possible second to leave my little family. Wow. I still can't believe Ana is pregnant. I can't believe how thrilled I am. And I can't wait for everyone to know.
"Christian." I hear a familiar voice call my name.
When I turn around I see my grandparents headed my way. If only Ana was here to see them.
"Hello, gramps, grandma." I shake my grandfather's hand and kiss my grandmother's cheek, all with new meaning.
"How is little Teddy doing?" My grandmother always asks when we talk.
"He's great. Excited about going to kindergarten this fall," Among other things, like having a mom and a sibling on the way.
"He's getting so big, too fast. They always do."
"It's hard to believe he's going to be 5 in October." I agree.
"And what about this young girl your mother mentioned? You finally have a girlfriend?"
"Yes," I chuckle at how she brings up Ana. "We've been together for a little over a month and I already know she's it for me. I want to be with her forever."
"It happened that fast for your grandfather and I too." She smiles. "I'm just so happy to hear this. Where is she? I'd love to meet her."
Grandma looks around but she wont find Ana here.
"Actually, she is at home, at Escala with Teddy. But she will be attending breakfast tomorrow morning so you can meet her then, I'm sure she will be thrilled to see you two."
"Well, why isn't she here?" My grandmother asks in her no nonsense tone. "Doesn't Gail usually watch Teddy while you attend events?"
Before I can answer, not that I would know what to say, my mother approaches us.
But what am I supposed to say, my girlfriend is on the run from her legally-married abusive husband and she doesn't want her picture taken as a way for him to find her?
"They're about to serve dinner," Grace says after she greets us.
A second later the MC announces for everyone to be seated.
"Is she pretty?" My grandfather asks of Ana as we head to our table together.
"Beautiful," I correct him. Beyond beautiful doesn't even begin cover it. Breathtaking is more accurate.
I still remember the first time I laid eyes on her at Mia's restaurant. I was pissed off and when I walked in, more like stormed into the restaurant, I felt this breeze rush by me. The smell was amazing and somehow it instantly calmed me. Across the room, in the direction the breeze came from, Ana was busy waiting on a table, doing everything she could to blend in and go unnoticed, but she was a terrible waitress and looked stressed out at trying to learn how. When she glanced up and our eyes met, it felt like I was hit hard in my chest.
"Well," My grandfather brings me from my thoughts, "don't hold back, son, show me her photo."
I laugh because I would rather they see her in person but dig in my pocket for my phone anyway, not planning on actually showing him any of the photos I've captured of Ana, but when I put my hand in my pocket it's empty, save for my wallet. I check my other pocket, even though I don't normally keep my phone there, but that one is empty too. I'm standing near the entrance of the tent, patting myself down worse than a police officer would.
"Fuck." I hiss.
"What's wrong?" Gramps asks.
"I don't have my phone." Teddy was playing with it before I left, but I thought I got it back from him. I guess I was too distracted with visions of Ana and the stages of her pregnancy.
"No worries, we'll see her tomorrow."
"What if she needs me?"
"You can call from the house phone to check on her," Gramps insists, "Besides, it's late and she's probably sleeping by now."
I agree with him and continue towards the table.
I'm sure Kate has her phone with her, and Ana knows her number if she needs anything. I'm sure she'll call Kate if she can't get ahold of me. And gramps is right, Ana is probably sleeping by now. I could call her after the dinner, but I'd probably wake her up. She's safe, I convince myself. Not to mention, I left Sawyer there with them- he is in the staff quarters only a few feet away- and nobody can get into the apartment without the access code.
At the table, as dinner is served, the usually conversations begin: My mother trying to convince her parents into moving to Washington since Michigan is too far away and their visits to each other are few and far between. Mia's restaurant, Elliot's construction company, and the paper that Kate runs. And the great-grandchildren; Teddy and Ava.
"When will you all give me another great-grandbaby?" My grandmother asks the three of her grandchildren sitting at the table.
Soon, I want to say. I want to tell them now that Ana is pregnant and we're expecting a baby. But Ana isn't here and I want to tell my family with her, it's what we agreed upon.
Kate glances at me but keeps quiet.
Ana said Kate was with her when she took the test and even though Ana did not tell Kate the results of the test it was suggested that the results were positive.
I tune everyone out, giving a small acknowledgement that I'm following along with them, but all I can think about is Ana and the new baby, how much my life has changed since Teddy came into it unexpectedly. Ana came in just the same. I never expected to fall in love, ever. But I couldn't see myself falling for anyone but her.
"So what have you two been up to since we last spoke?" My mom asks her parents.
My grandmother's answer pulls me from my thoughts and has my full attention now.
"Well, we've just started to organize a non-profitable organization that helps women, or men, get away from their abusive spouses. It's still early stages, but we want to build it up soon. There are many shelters available for those who don't have any loved ones to help them or if they can't afford alternative housing, but who wants to live in an open room with several cots and other people they don't know when they are coming from a home. It gives them a reason to go back and forgive their partner only for the abuse to continue. We want to have housing set-up for these people who need to get away from abusive situations. Help them gets jobs or go back to school. Help with restraining orders, divorcing and such. We're still working out the kinks, and we need more donations."
"Why don't you move to Washington," My mother tries again with their moving situation. "I could help you organize it. We started Coping Together roughly 25 years ago, so I know how to start a charity. We could call it Safe Haven, and by this time next year we could have a few mini apartments lined up around Seattle. I'm sure this will take off like wild fire once we get it going."
"We don't have anyone in Detroit to stay for anymore," My grandmother tells my grandfather sadly. But we left when I was 4, they haven't had anyone in Detroit in over 27 years. They stayed because they've lived their all their lives and loved the city. Why else have they been avoiding the move?
"We'd need to sell the house first." My grandfather says, "I wouldn't want to move without selling first."
"I don't know, Theo, we've lived there nearly all our lives. We started our family there, dear." It's clear grandma doesn't want to move. I'm not sure she ever will.
The dinner continues and every now and then I see my grandmother asking Mia questions. I wonder if she's asking about Ana. As I think of Ana and my grandparents' new charity, I know I want to help.
"I'd like to be a sponsor once you get your charity going, just let me know what you need." I tell my grandparents.
Maybe if Ana had some place to go, someone to help her get away from him, she wouldn't be afraid to turn around. She wouldn't run at every chance she got when something spooked her because it would've been taken care of properly. There are so many things that could've happened to her while she was on the run, so many ways her life could've turned out. She could've ended up like my birthmother... No. Don't think about that, Grey.
"That's lovely, Christian," My mother turns to smile at me but then frowns. "Where is Ana?"
Is she just now noticing that my girl isn't with me? And did she forget that Ana is staying with Teddy?
"She's watching Teddy, remember."
"Why didn't she want to come, sweetheart?"
I run my fingers nervously through my hair, not wanting to say the real reason as to why my girlfriend didn't want to come to the charity event. And I can't say she wasn't feeling well because Ana said weeks before the event that she didn't want to attend.
"I convinced her to come," Kate chimes in, answering for me. I frown wondering what she's up to but let her take over. "She was going to attend tonight but when we were looking for dresses at the mall yesterday, Ana wasn't feeling well and decided to stay home."
"Ana's not feeling well?" My mother turns her attention away from Kate to ask me. "Maybe I should check on her in the morning?"
"Actually, we already went to a doctor this morning." Great, now I'm saying my mother isn't good enough to check over my love.
"Is everything okay?" My mother isn't bothered that we saw another doctor, but is still concerned for Ana's wellbeing.
"Everything is perfect." I smile thinking about how perfect our baby is and remembering the scan, seeing that little blip on the screen and hearing the heartbeat.
Dr. Greene assured us that everything was fine and looked healthy as she looked over everything twice on my insistence. I wasn't there for Hannah's pregnancy with Teddy because I didn't know about him. I doubt we would've been together romantically, even for the sake of our child, but I would've been there for him had I known... once I came around, I'm sure.
Seeing my baby on that screen today was an amazing experience that I will never forget. The ultrasound is safe in my wallet and it feels as if it is burning a whole through the leather. I'm wanting to show everyone the little blip that Dr. Greene said was our baby. It looks nothing like a baby at this stage, but I remember seeing Elliot's when Kate was pregnant with Ava.
"Why are you smiling like that and way is everything perfect?" My mother asks, a hint of joy in her tone. "What doctor did she see, darling?"
Shit!
It clicks in my mother's head what doctor Ana saw and why I'm smiling.
I'm sure it's obvious to her, and Kate, but everyone else has not picked up on it. Thank fuck, because Ana and I wanted to tell them together.
It doesn't take long before my mother is grinning like the cat who got the canary.
"Ana and I want to talk to everyone tomorrow." Yeah, that's not subtle, Grey. It's like a big sign saying what my mother is thinking is correct.
"Oh, Christian, just tell us," Mother is nearly bouncing out of her seat. "Is she pregnant?"
"Ana is pregnant?!" Mia cheers, screeching and bringing all the attention to me now.
"Tomorrow." I continue to eat to avoid anymore questions, but it's pointless. The woman are about to attack me at any moment if I don't confirm or deny the allegation.
After they all take turns fawning over the ultrasound that I'm all too happy and proud to show off, and assuring them that Teddy is thrilled to be a big brother, my mother insists I go home to my family. I'm not needed here and I should've stayed with Ana to begin with.
I agree and stand once dinner is finished and they start the auction.
I can just imagine Ana sleeping in my bed, or raiding the kitchen in her silk nightgown and matching robe. I wonder if I should stop for ice cream, I remember that being something Kate craved. I also remember Elliot complaining that he had to go get watermelon in the middle of the night once or twice. I wonder if Ana has had any cravings yet.
Before I leave, I pull my dad aside so I can discuss a few things with him privately. I know Ana can't get a restraining order because then it will say on the order of protection where she is so he knows to avoid that area, but I want to ask my dad about the process of legally changing your name, without getting married, so she can legally become Anastasia Steele. I'd like to ask more about divorces, but I'll leave that for another day.
...
Apov
For some reason, I can't sleep. I think it's because Christian is not here. Since we've been together, and that night he overheard my nightmare on the phone, I have been sleeping with him. My reality is now better than my dreams could ever be. As comfortable as his bed is here, I can't get comfortable enough to sleep. I've thought about crawling in bed with Teddy, but I don't want to disturb him and Christian will be home later tonight. I found his library and read some, but now I'm just laying here.
A thumping noise startles me. I get out of bed while wrapping the robe Christian gave me around my body, and investigate.
My first stop is Teddy's room, checking that it wasn't him and that he is okay. He's still fast asleep, blissfully unaware of the noise I heard.
It obviously wasn't him, although I'm still unsure of what the noise was.
Christian shouldn't be home til later but he said Sawyer was staying in the staff apartment, maybe it was him.
Walking out to the main room, it's dark, the moon lighting the room but nobody is here.
The view is something I don't think I could ever get use to, it's beautiful up here.
As I make my way towards the windows, I decide to walk out on the balcony.
We're on the top floor, not even Spider-Man himself could reach us. Okay, maybe Spider-Man could, but certainly nothing bad could happen up here. It's like we are in the clouds. It's so comforting.
Instead of going back to bed, because I wont get any sleep until Christian is home, I lean against the railing, enjoying the city lights and fresh air.
A noise behind me startles me so I quickly spin around.
"What are you doing here?" I ask him.
"You look beautiful." He ignores my question.
"What are you doing home so soon?" I ask again. I know the event couldn't possibly be over yet, he's only been gone maybe an hour or two.
"I missed you too much to stay all night." He pushes off the door frame where he was leaning and watching me.
"I missed you, too." I tell him, wrapping my arms around his neck when he reaches me. He holds me around my waist and pulls me close.
He looks so handsome, so sophisticated in his tux. Christian could look handsome in anything, nothing he wore could hide his beauty but naked suits him best.
"My family... they sort of found out about the baby." He gives me a guilty smile.
"Uh-huh," I giggle. "They just stumbled upon it, huh? I knew you wouldn't be able to keep it quiet." I shake my head at him but I'm not upset. I'm just worried what his family will think.
"Are they okay with it?" I ask him.
"They're all thrilled." He assures me. "My grandparents were there, they want to meet you. You'll see them tomorrow at breakfast." He smiles at me like he has some secret he's keeping.
"Even though we haven't been together for very long?" I ask him because don't want anyone thinking badly of me with how soon this happened.
"Trust me, baby, they are all happy. But we do need to talk and have a conversation about what's to come."
"I know," I agree. "I'm sure you want me to officially move in with you and Teddy permanently."
"Of course," He confirms. "As well as quitting your waitressing job at Mia's restaurant. I don't want you to be stressed and working too hard when you don't need to work at all."
"Christian, I need my job, or at least a job. I can't just let you take care of everything, and it's not about the money, I know you have more than enough to take care of us. I just- I don't know, I just need it. For me, ya know?"
"We'll compromise." He counters, knowing I need this. "How about, you focus on that book you've been writing instead of working at the restaurant, and once it's ready to be published, that will be your job, your money? You'll be a published author."
"Deal." I like that.
"Dance with me." He whispers, changing the subject.
I smile and let him lead me around the balcony since he's still holding me.
It's just us, him in his tux looking incredibly sexy, and me in my nightgown and matching robe looking a hot mess.
We dance around the balcony of his Seattle penthouse apartment with the moonlight shinning down on us and the beautiful city lights surrounding us, twinkling in the night. And even though I didn't attend the charity event with him and his family, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else in the world. This is my reality.
"I love you, Christian." I tell him sincerely.
"I love you, baby." He kisses me softly.