DV: Here's the next chapter. It's mostly pointless filler shonen fighting, but hey, that's Bleach, ne?

US- I can at least say that this gives a good chance to show off how our Self Inserts fight and differ. The main leads are one of the main driving points of this fic, so naturally we'll be showing off their powers, history and personalities over the course of this thing- so even if you haven't read the originals, it doesn't matter. So enjoy, and feel free to leave a Review afterwards on what you like, and what sort of things you'd like to see the duo get up to in due time.

Disclaimer: We still own nothing, save our OC's. Bleach is owned by Tite Kubo, and unlike anything we've ever worked on, is actually about to end. Scary, huh?

Kenpachi I

Kenpachi was having the most fun he'd had in ages. Fighting not just one, but two strong opponents. Neither of whom showed any signs of breaking under his immense reiryoku. So few could survive him -yet alone fight him- these days.

Landing on his feet, because the title of captain wasn't given out like a party favor, Kenpachi flexed out his shoulders to once again look at his opponents.

Minato drew out a tanto, holding it upside down in his left hand, "Do you want to draw this out, Marcus? Or just go Shikai now?"

"It's Kenpachi." Kenpachi could hear the emphasis as the younger male reappeared next to the stronger one. "You hit him hard and fast, then keep hitting him. Really, really hard. Your choice really, but I'll be using it."

"Really hard huh? That last punch actually hurt, so I'm looking forwards to this! But it's no fun if I just stand back and let you hit me! No, I think it's time for me to attack."

And so in a blast of energy, Kenpachi was upon them, chipped nodachi swung wildly, defense barely an afterthought. A flurry of blows erupted between the three combatants, Kenpachi solely attacking, Minato solely defending against the seemingly random attacks, and Marcus trying to dodge what he could.

The Captain could tell that the weaker one, Marcus, was the physically weakest in the group, so had to rely on not getting hit altogether. He tended to use his companion as a buffer for the majority of attacks, only chipping in now and again to deflect or parry attacks.

Kenpachi smirked, and increased his own speed and strength. There was a noticeable shift in the battle as the duo were pushed onto the defensive. They were ill suited to working as a team, and were second judging their own actions to prevent friendly fire.

If there was one thing he hated, it was people holding back in a fight, for any reason. So he'd just have to keep hitting them until they gave it their all.

"Stop saying you'll hit me, and hit me already!" Kenpachi snarled, unleashing his strongest blow yet. The overhead strike slammed into Minato's waiting blade, and he buckled under the weight of it as the floor around him began to crack.

As expected, while Minato was blocking the blade, Marcus was capitalising on the opportunity, and had Shunpoed behind the Captain.

He easily saw that level of motion, and could tell that it would be effortless on his part to predict where he would be going, and strike him unexpectedly.

But where would the fun in that be?

Marcus appeared behind him, then prepared to unleash a horizontal strike at his back. To his perceptive eye, the blade had already changed "A silent Shikai release, huh?"

"Hoshikuzu Surrashu, (Stardust Slash)" then bright azure energy was flooding along the edge of the weapon, coating it in energy, before the weapon was swung at his neck.

Rather than striking neck, the warm steel met his willing hand, which caught the blade. He could feel the attack pierce flesh and draw blood, and had he not coated his body in his massive reiryoku it would have likely cleaved straight through.

Then, using his massive strength, he leveraged the blade, pulling it from the Shinigami's grasp and swinging the hilt of it towards Minato. He was more than ready, and disengaged before the Zanpakutō got anywhere near him.

It wasn't necessary though, as the blade had begun to fade away from the moment it left Marc's hands.

"Don't wanna let anyone else wield your sword? I can appreciate that!" with Minato disengaged, he was now free to direct his attention towards the younger. He realised it too, as he only just had time to resummon his blade and block the horizontal cut meant to sever head from body.

To say it was blocked was inaccurate- it was resisted. Marc lacked physical abilities to match Kenpachi, and while he might have prevented the sword decapitating him, he was fighting a losing battle. Inch by inch Kenpachi was gaining ground, coming closer and closer to bringing sharp metal to flesh.

Which was when the older one had to be a freakin' buzz kill and start throwing Kido spells out everywhere.

While Kenpachi was able to shrug off the spells and parry those he couldn't, it had been enough of a distraction to let Marc retreat. He now stood behind Minato, and was glowering silently at the Captain.

"Minato, can you take point?" Asked Marc. "I'm squishy, and blocking that hit almost broke all the bones in both my hands. I'm in excruciating pain right now, and I'm already exhausted to begin with from my showdown with Omega and all the rest of the crap I was up to before I confronted him."

"If I must." Minato shrugged, taking a confident step forwards. "While I prefer to take a less direct role in combat, it is within my capabilities. I can compensate for your weakness and inability."

"... that sounds kinda offensive." Marc noted dryly. "Offensive, but true. But give me a break! It's been a reeeaaallly long day."

"Where were you in the plot?"

"Just finished Fake Karakura, though I did a lot of fighting before in Hueco Mundo. Let's just say that the Quatro Espada is fucking bullshit and leave it at that."

Minato almost winced at that, "Yes. If you were fighting someone like him earlier today, I think it is excusable."

Impatient, Kenpachi allowed his reiatsu to explode, "Are ya gonna stop talking like a bunch of pansies, or am I going to have to make you!?"

"Very well." Minato stated, "Renzokutai."

Kenpachi had seen many zanpakutō in his career, but this had to one of the strangest. Because nothing happened besides a reiatsu release. Now, there were some zanpakuto similar to that, but they had at least some visible change, even if it wasn't obvious to someone not as skilled as him.

As Minato returned the nodachi to wherever it was, he turned to Kenpachi, "I forgot how good this feels. To cut loose a bit. Marc, stand back, don't want you getting caught up in my attacks."

"Maybe he'll finally starting fighting seriously now?" With a bloodthirsty yell, Kenpachi rushed forward, blade raised for an overhead slash, only to find himself entangled in a mass of black ribbons that used to be Minato's arms.

In the corner of his eye, Kenpachi saw Marc's confused look and his exclamation, "What is-? You know what, I don't even want to know."

The ribbons slowly slithered their way around Kenpachi's body, progressively tightening and strangling him as they surged upwards.

"The hell is this shit? Fight me properly damn it!"

Struggling against the ribbons, and ultimately winning in freeing an arm, he reached up and ripped off his eye-patch. A veritable tsunami of golden reiatsu buffeted the area, flattening some of the nearby buildings and freeing him from his current predicament

"You just had to make him mad," Marc deadpanned.

"I'm sorry, who tagged out who?" Minato replied, un-amused, while using the ribbons as whips to keep range between combatants.

Did these two ever stop? Kenpachi just wanted to fight, all this banter was really getting on his nerves.

Slashing away the surprisingly fragile ribbons, now that he had some space, Kenpachi had enough smarts to recognize another frontal charge would probably end the same way. This just wasn't too fun anymore. But that Marc guy had enough of a break. Avoiding Minato entirely, who didn't seem terribly keen on attacking, he rocketed towards Marc.

Marc raised his blade in time to avoid a bifurcation, giving Kenpachi a fist of flames to the mouth and a Bakudō or two for his trouble. Meanwhile, the ribbons Minato was giving off increased in both thickness and number, until eventually there were too many to cut. Kenpachi was just about to kick things up a notch when a dozen tendrils clamped down tight onto his leg, then began climbing up him, wrapping him up even as he fought back. Furthermore, Marc refused to let up and sent Bakudō spell after Bakudō spell at him, only reinforcing his bindings further.

Kenpachi reared back without the use of his arms, and snarled. The Kido spells weren't particularly strong, while the ribbons could be broken with time, but they kept adding to one another and were replaced almost as soon as he broke them. He was hard pressed to split his attention between both combatants.

Then Minato reappeared behind Kenpachi, eye slit like a cat's. And that's when Kenpachi realised it. With Marc in front of him, Minato behind him, two walls to his sides, without his arms and his power slowly being sealed, he was trapped. Whether it was planned or not, he'd been had.

"Minato, we can't hold him for long. Either we end this now, or he'll escape and escalate, which'll be a pain in the ass," Marc commented.

"End it how?"

"You know how." Marc said darkly. "I don't much want this outcome, but damnit, this isn't my home. I have no stakes in this. There's only one thing I want…a certain knights severed head, and that opportunity has been and gone."

"There will be repercussions." Minato warned.

"The only repercussions 'll be what I'll do to you when I get outta this!" Kenpachi warned, physically straining to destroy the bindings.

"I know. But do I really look like I care right now?" to Kenpachi, he didn't.

Minato only nodded, coming to a similar conclusion. From what Kenpachi could only assume was his back, a large tentacle emerged, thicker than its owner. It was tipped with an almost copy of Minato's head, only proportionally sized to the tendril, with red cat slit eyes and multiple rows of razor teeth.

Marc looked on in a mixture of horror and confusion, while Minato's new form surged forwards. Kenpachi looked the grotesque thing in the eyes, grinned, and then laughed. There was a final futile struggle from his part, and he even managed to tear apart the majority of his bindings, but he was too late. Hypocritically, Kenpachi- who hated others holding back on him- had gotten too used to restraining himself to fight enemies. He'd put himself in a position of weakness that he could have avoided had he gone all out earlier, and now that he was taking it seriously it was too late.

By the time Kenpachi was almost free, the jaws had already snapped shut with an almighty CRASH. The last thing Kenpachi heard was a sigh, followed by, "I'm sure you'll taste like shit."

Then Kenpachi Zaraki, the Captain of Squad Eleven, the only man in history to reach so high up the Shinigami ranks through his immense combat skills alone, knew nothing more.