CHAPTER SEVEN
5 years later… I was tired. Tired of worrying, tired of jumping through hoops and when I thought I was done, looking ahead and seeing yet more hoops to jump through. It's been 5 long years since the last time I saw Ikotu now he would be about 15 and Utau 14 I hope they are O.K. Lidia got ill about 2 years ago and it won't go away. She's so weak that she doesn't go out much anymore. Andre and I rotate taking her out to shop or if she's feeling up to it, just to get out of the house and do something. Beatrix and Santino had a little boy, Giovanni. Abriana is on maternity leave with a little girl, Lilianna I think is what they named her. Giovanni is 3 now, while Liliana is only a week old. Antonio and Santino both love their little bundles of joy and have new found passion to help me get back to Japan and my own family. Beatrix brings Giovanni by at least 3 times a week maybe even more so that Giovanni can see his Nana. Even though Lidia isn't related to Beatrix and Andre by blood they still call her Nana. I never would have guessed that it would take so long to get back to them. I keep telling myself that I can fix this and that I am already fixing it with the help of the friends I have made while in Italy. I still don't have enough money to get back to Japan. I have taken up a full time job at a local retail store since Lidia got sick since the extra revenue from her restaurant now goes towards her doctor's bills. That started about 3 years ago and without that extra revenue from 'A Little Taste of Italy' to help pay the bills and buy food I take those expenses out of my own pay check and after all of that it leaves very little for me to put away in my savings to get back to Japan. Along with the doctors saying that Lidia doesn't have much longer makes me think that even if I had enough money to get back to Japan, I wouldn't feel right leaving the people who have helped me here in Italy. I'm conflicted about what I want to do, should I leave as soon as I have enough money to make it back to Japan or do I stay and help Lidia out in her ailing health. I want to do both and I comfort myself in the fact that I don't have all of the money yet, but it's only going to be true for so long. Then there are the dreams I have of Ikuto and Utau each time they are a little bit older and every time they ask me "Why did you leave and not come back?" then there's with them being old and they say instead "It's too late now Aruto our lives are over you waited too long and now it's too late." The next night would show me their grave stones right next to each other their mothers grave behind theirs and every time I would fall on my knees in front of them and cry that's when I would wake up and realize I had tears running down my face. Then the next night it would start all over again with them as babies first Ikotu would appear and then Utau a little after that. They would be squirming bundles that I would pick up and hold to my chest saying "it's alright I'm coming back just wait a little longer just a little longer. I'll come back and never leave you again I promise." Sometimes even my wife, Souko, would appear and would always have this pained expression on her face.
"Hey Aruto it's time to get back to work our breaks over you need to come back down to earth," Enrico was saying bringing out of my thoughts.
"Yeah ok let's go help some customers," I replied getting up from my seat to leave the break room with him. Enrico and I work at the changing rooms in a local clothing store. Enrico is a tall thin man at 6'3 and about 225 pounds. He has dirty blonde hair and light blue eyes. He says that there isn't anyone in his family that is tall so they don't know where the gene came from. He can be a little weird at times but he's a good enough guy. I'll have to admit that other than playing music I really don't have any skills that I'm very good at. I know how to do things like cook and clean and stuff like that but I'm not good enough to be a chief or have a house cleaning business not that I would want to anyway. After work I'll have to head right home so I can relieve Andre from taking care of Lidia. It's not that she needs a lot of help to do things we just don't want her to be home alone for long periods of time. With her failing health she could fall and not be able to get up again until someone comes and if I'm at work it could be hours before I find her. The stress of balancing this is great and I have grown closer to everyone that leaving them will be difficult to do and feel like I'm leaving a second family behind. Plus I want to repay my debt to Lidia for letting me stay in her home while I've been here.
"Hey Aruto here comes a customer get ready she's probably going to complain about something," Enrico whispered to me getting my mind back on work instead of worrying about everything.
There was a middle aged woman who was approaching us with an armload of clothes. Enrico is probably right since we have seen scenes like this before with many other ladies that come to the store. After they try on the clothes they picked out they come to us and proceed to tell us why each piece of clothing didn't fit then hand it to us to put back on the racks. The most irritating thing to me is that we cannot say anything to the customer that may upset them. We just force a smile and agree with the ladies it gets very predictable after a while. She came up to our counter and we gave her a card and she went back into the dressing rooms to start trying on the clothes.
"I bet you she comes out with at least half of that pile destined to go back to the shelf," Enrico said to me quietly when we heard a changing room door shut. She will be the last customer let into the changing rooms for today. I nodded to Enrico in acknowledgement of his bet.
"Yeah maybe," I replied not really paying attention. I just wanted to get home and make that Lidia is alright. To both of our surprise the woman came out of the dressing room about 10 minutes later. Not a single complaint came out of her mouth she thanked us then left with all of the clothes she brought in.
"Well Aruto looks like you won this time," Enrico said as we started closing up the dressing rooms. The rest of my shift passed without any incident. I hurried to Lidia's house in the fading twilight. I walked up the path to the front door. I could hear Andre and Lidia's voices coming from inside. 'That's good nothing big seemed to have happened today.' I thought to myself as I opened the door to find Lidia and Andre sitting in the living room drinking tea. I shut the door against the cold and felt the heat of the house hit my face. They had the fireplace going making the house pleasantly warm. They both turned to look at me as I took my coat off.
"Aruto glad you made it home safely would you like to have some tea?" Lidia asked gesturing to an extra empty tea cup sitting on the coffee table.
"Thank you Lidia I'm going to go change my clothes and then I'll join you and Andre." I headed back to my room and quickly changed clothes. I headed back to the living room to join Andre and Lidia for tea.
"So how was work today Aruto?" Lidia asked as she sipped her tea. This is the normal routine we go through every evening when I come home from work. I took a sip of tea before replying.
"It went well today nothing happened it was the same old same old. Enrico told me to tell you hi from him. What about you? Did you and Andre doing anything fun today?" This question always seems to cheer Lidia up when I ask how she is and what she did that day even if the answer is nothing.
"Well after you left Andre and I went out and took a walk down the street to the bakery and bought some bread then we came home and stayed here for the rest of the day," Lidia told me enthusiastically. The whole time throughout her story I sipped my tea but never took my eyes off of Lidia. This allowed Lidia to go into details about what they did today. Finally I set my tea cup down and just sat with my eyes closed listening to Lidia's story until I heard or rather stopped hearing Lidia's voice. I opened my eyes and saw that her eyes were drooping as sleep crept up on her. I looked over to Andre and saw that he already had a blanket and gently laid it over Lidia slipping her tea cup out of her hand before she dropped it. I stood and grabbed the tea pot and our cups off of the coffee table and followed Andre into the kitchen. I offered to wash the dishes and Andre agreed leaning against the counter seemingly in thought.
"You know she's not going to live forever, one day she will…" he left it hanging but I knew what he meant. I just wish that he wouldn't bring it up. I didn't want to leave Lidia when she needed help and it was my way of saying thank you to her. I finished washing the dishes and Andre and I helped Lidia get into bed. When I woke up in the morning I went to check on her and get her up for the day. When I opened the door I realized that it was oddly silent in the room, I couldn't her Lidia's breathing.
"Lidia?" I called out tentatively pushing the door open wider. Light from the hallway illuminated Lidia's form on the bed. I couldn't see the usual rise and fall indicating that someone is still alive. Fearing the worst I approached her bedside and turned on the lamp illuminating her face, it was blue, not a good sign. "Lidia?" I asked again hoping there would be some response there was not. She had a broad grin on her face I guess to signal that she is alright but it looked eerie frozen on her face like that. I had to check to make sure she was really gone for myself so, with a shaking hand I reached out and checked her neck for a pulse, there wasn't one, no surprise there. I left the room shutting the door behind me, tears making everything blurry and headed to the phone. I dialed Andre's number as I placed the phone up to my ear, I took a deep breath to steady myself. I counted the rings; one, two, three. Right before the fourth ring he picked up.
"Hello?" Andre's sleepy voice came over the receiver. I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. "Uh… Hello? Anyone there?" This time I was able make my mouth work with me again.
"Andre its Aruto, its Lidia we've… we've lost her man. S-she's gone. L-Lidia died," I final got out to silence on the other end. I waited a minute or two for Andre to say something, anything but there was nothing. "A-Andre? You still there?" All I could hear was faint chocked crying.
"I'll be right over," Andre finally chocked out after a moment.
"Could you call Abriana and Beatrix for me? I don't think I have the heart to tell them," I told him suddenly.
"Yeah I-I'll tell them and I'll be right over," Andre said taking a shaky breath to calm himself down. There was a click signaling that Andre had hung up the phone. I stood there with the phone in my hand before hanging up the phone. I didn't want to be alone and especially not with a dead body. After a few minutes I couldn't take it anymore so, I threw on my coat and stood outside to wait for Andre and the others. After a few minutes of standing out in the cold an ambulance pulled onto the street. It stopped in front of the house and the paramedics climbed out. After watching them get their stuff ready for a minute I noticed that Andre had pulled up behind the ambulance. I went to go over to Andre's car when the paramedics came over to ask me questions.
"Sir are you the one that called in for the ambulance?" one of the paramedics asked me.
"No I didn't but I can take you to where she is," I replied the paramedics nodded and followed me into the house. This time it wasn't as bad seeing her since I knew what to expect this time. I didn't go into the room I just stopped in the doorway and gestured inside with a quick "In here". The paramedics nodded to me and headed in to do an initial check of the body. I didn't stay to watch and instead went out into the living room. By now the others had come inside, Andre was talking to Santino with Davide standing nearby looking at something on a shelf. Their wives Beatrix and Abriana were locked in a tight hug and crying on each other's shoulders, clearly beyond any comforting that any of us guys could do. By now the others had come inside, Andre was talking to Santino with Davide standing nearby looking at something on a shelf. Their wives Beatrix and Abriana were locked in a hug and crying on each other's shoulders clearly beyond any comforting that us guys could do. I walked over to Santino and Andre. They both looked over as I approached them.
"Hey Aruto are you alright? You look a little pale" Santino asked with a concerned look on his face.
"Yeah I'm fine at least as fine as you guys are considering the situation," I replied at the point where I felt nothing. It's almost like someone turned off my ability to feel any emotions for the moment. I guess this must be what shock is. After what seemed like forever the coroner arrived to authenticate Lidia's passing. We were all gathered in the living room with a solemn air around us. A few of the neighbors came over to find out what happened. So many people came and went that I lost track. Everything seemed like it was on the other side of a wall or I wasn't witnessing it at all. I came out of it a little when they finally took her away to go to the funeral home to be prepared for the wake. We all stayed in the living room silent now that the initial shock is gone. We sat in silence until a knock at the door startled us. I got up before anyone else and went to the door. I paused for a second at the door to pull myself together. I opened the door and saw another neighbor on the door step. I have seen her a few times and chatted a bit with her before. She introduced herself as Rosalie.
"I saw the ambulance leave and I came over to see if everything is alright," She asked looking worried when she got a good look at my face. It must look terrible with my eyes red and puffy from wiping away tears and crying. For a second I didn't want to tell her the bad news and save her from it bit that is not an option that would yield good results. She would find out eventually anyway.
"No, everything is not ok, Lidia has…" I took a deep breath and I felt my throat close up "passed away," I told her slowly making sure that she heard every word. I saw the realization dawn in her eyes as she took in what I had said. I felt like a large heavy rock had been dropped into my stomach I must have just ruined this woman's day.
"Y-you mean she's gone? But I spoke with her only yesterday and she seemed to be getting better!" Rosalie exclaimed tears starting to form in her eyes.
"I know but it's true she's gone, would you like to come in for a cup of tea?" I offered opening the door wider and stepping to the side to let her in.
"Thank you I'll only stay for a few minutes," Rosalie said stepping into the house and sitting carefully down in between Beatrix and Abriana. "How are you two holding up?"
"Oh we are holding in here, we are going to have to leave soon we left our children with the sitter," Beatrix answered quietly turning to face Rosalie. I went and got us all more tea. About 10 minutes later Santino and Beatrix left and 5 minutes after that Davide, Abriana, and Rosalie left leaving me alone for the first time that day. Now alone with my thoughts the first thing that came to my mind was 'what's going to happen next.'