Chapter 18:

DPOV

We made it just in time back to our apartments before the rush of people and reporters and crazy stuff happened. Lissa had wisely announced her pregnancy in writing and now everyone was going crazy with wanting to know the details, asking about the baby, how she was doing etc. The guardians at the door were being overrun with gifts for the little one as everyone wanted to let our queen know how happy they were for her and Christian.

The thing was I knew some of them just came and brought gifts to get in Lissa's good graces. Most of the royals who had come and wanted to speak to her or leave their signed gifts were in that category. Some others were genuinely happy with a new prince or princess not just because it was always a good thing when people could swoon over babies but also because for a long time Lissa had been the last of the Dragomirs. It had gotten a little better with the addition of Jill, but some didn't consider Jill a true Dragomir because she was born out of wedlock and because she wasn't in the picture much. The arrival of a new Dragomir was evidence that our society was rebuilding. The near-extinctions of the Dragomir's had been a grim reminder for all of us that life was fragile and that even Royal families weren't immune to the dangers of this world. In many ways the near-extinction of a Royal line had fueled a lot of the fear at court. It didn't matter that the last few were killed in a car accident. Most of them had been targeted by Strigoi over the centuries to the point that only one family remained.

So good cheers all around.

I wondered what would happen if we announced our pregnancy. I mean we wouldn't be releasing a written statement but word will get around fast that Rose is pregnant. Beside some rumors that will be circulating I also wondered how many gifts we would be getting. Not just from royals trying to request our children but also guardians who would be eager to take our place on team Alpha.

The next morning things had settled down a little. The joined living room was loaded with gift and sorted in two piles. A pile to keep which was relatively small and a pile to donate. Lissa had written down the names of the people who had brought them gifts and was now making thank you cards.

I was sitting next to Christian who was reading a book. A pregnancy book. He had a weird look on his face.

"What's wrong?"

He actually looked a little pale now.

"They say labor can last up to 48 hours and that a third of the women will have a rupture which needs stiches. There is even something called a complete rupture. It describes what it is and I can't even… here they have pictures."

He handed me the book and I visibly shuddered. But I knew that one or two stiches is not uncommon but this was. Also labor usually lasted an hour or ten. Usually at 48 hours the baby would be born via a c-section. But still the visual was frightening. Certainly because I knew twins could cause complications and I knew I was a big baby. If two babies that size would have to come out of Rose's small frame I wondered how much of her was left afterwards.

"I am sure Lissa will be alright, we have the best doctors here. Plus this is a human book, Moroi children are usually smaller and leaner so Lissa shouldn't have much trouble."

He nodded.

"Why don't we start with some earlier chapters huh. We have another six months to figure that out."

Christian nodded and flipped to the pages at the front of the book that talked about the pregnancy at this stage.

"Second trimester, okay… oh well that isn't bad. Less nauseous and less tired and the baby bumb is relatively small and oh, increased sex drive due to hormones and increased blood supply… nice."

"Keep reading."

"Oh, it could also have the opposite effect. Well I will just hope for the first one."

He smirked at me. Yeah me too, me too.

He put the pregnancy book down and picked up a baby book.

"You really are taking this seriously aren't you?"

"yeah, Lissa broke down the other day saying she didn't have time to do all this because she is so busy with being queen and that she will be a horrible mother because she doesn't know any of the stuff. Eventually I had to promise to do all the legwork and make notes and everything, so at least one of us knows what we are doing."

I had to laugh about that. Lissa trying to micro-manage everything.

"Well I know a little about the birth from my sisters. It is good to be prepared and know what to expect, but as a parent you mostly just wing it. Of course you have to know it isn't okay to give a baby dr. pepper and that you have to support the head the first few weeks. But most of it is common sense and just seeing what works."

"Hey I am all for it, but I can't tell Lissa that, she will worry even more if there is nothing she can prepare for, so I am reading pregnancy and baby books."

I smiled. I think it should be in there somewhere to bend to the will of the pregnant woman, makes your life a lot easier.

I started reading alongside of him. I was more interested in the development of the babies after they were born. I needed to know what was natural and what was… not.

We read a passage of how babies first have to be able to lift their heads and have enough muscle control to be able to lie on their stomach and keep their heads up. That after a few weeks they start laughing and expressing emotions other than hungry. Than that they roll over and start crawling.

The girls walked in and were staring at us. I looked over at Christian and I imagined we did look really funny. We were both hanging over the book our heads almost touching pointing things out. With the intensity we were looking at it, you would think it was the playboy.

Lissa awed and Rose had a smile on her face. Well they weren't the only ones who were preparing to be parents.

The next few days passed quietly. The stream of presents seemed to have slowed down and court was beginning to get back to normal. There had been banners everywhere congratulating Lissa and Christian. Many businesses took the opportunity to market this and came up with crazy ideas to sell their stuff. Rose particularly liked the baby cupcakes the bakery made.

Maybe it was the craziness around court. Maybe it was because for the first time in a few months Rose and I had limited duties which mostly consisted of guarding council meetings and making rosters. I was getting restless.

Now the feeling wasn't anything new. I was a physical person and I needed the training to stay sane. If I was off duty long enough I would get antsy. But this was different. Or maybe just a stronger feeling. I felt like a caged animal. I could practically see the trenches I had walked in the ground passing. I felt like I had to restrain myself to do anything. Yesterday I didn't just break a jar trying to open it. I broke the entire counter. I knew Rose was feeling similar. She has always had a wild streak reminding me much of a cat that you just couldn't keep indoors. There was a need for the freedom in her eyes and I started to notice it got stronger every day. I felt the same need reflected in me.

For the past few years we had been in a constant form of alertness. We were either guarding our charges which spend a lot of time those days outside of the wards or we went on slayer missions. I didn't know if this feeling had to do with our recent alterations of if this has always been the case but now we feel it more because it has been forever since we had any time off or taken it slow. I knew one thing though, we needed to either get this under control or needed an outlet. Or we would go crazy and destroy more than a jar.

Rose walked in in her training gear and threw me mine.

"We are going to the gym. I booked a private room."

I smiled. She had been thinking the same thing. An outlet it is. I knew I had to be a bit more careful now that she is pregnant but Rose would still be Rose and as long as I didn't kick her point blank in the stomach she and the twins would be fine. I wondered if the twins would heal as fast as we do now? Not that I was taking any chances.

We greeted several guardians on our way to the private room. We had learned a while back it was easier for us to just take a private room instead of sparring in the main hall. It meant a lot of staring and challenging. People wanted to fight us a lot. We had a small tournament here once and of course it was us in the final. To many people had challenged us that day and since then the steady stream of challengers had died down a bit.

I plunked the gym bag in the corner and Rose installed the ipod. She loved working with music and I didn't mind. Today she had picked instrumental only. It sounded a bit like African music. Somehow it was perfect for our mood. The deep base from the drums resonating with my heartbeat. Something primal was being called forth by the music and by our activities. When Rose turned around she had red rimmed eyes and I knew if I looked in a mirror I would too. It had taken me a while to accept the way we looked now. I had cringed every time I saw her more Strigoi-like, but now I think it suited her. I think there was a difference between the soulless eyes of a Strigoi and Rose's eyes which burned with fire and were only being enhanced by the red. And the fangs were hot.

We normally would start out slow and circle each other but now we just dove into it. Normally we would have to stretch and warm-up but any damage to our muscles was immediately repaired so there was no need. It seemed are bodies were in a perpetual state of action all the time and it was good to release some of it. Blow after blow I felt the tension leave me and being replaced with an almost serene feeling. The music in the background, the sound and rhythm of our fist colliding, the steady increase of our breathing. We were in our own little world.

I hit her in the face and broke her lip but it healed instantly. She retaliated with a swipe at my side and I felt the bones break, but a moment later they were snapped back together. I knew we had to conserve our energy or we would have to feed again. But Rose had compared it to spirit magic. You can't use too much or you will go insane, but not using it at all isn't an option either, because it would bottle up and drive you crazy none-the less. And she had been right. Even if the broken ribs hurt like hell I could feel myself calming down when some of that energy was being expended.

We were in the home stretch now. We were going for the kill shots (well fake stake shots anyway) moving faster, punching harder. I didn't even feel the pain anymore, all I could feel was a sense of euphoria. The smile on Rose's face told me she was in a similar state of mind. She kicked, I blocked. I lunched, she evaded. She turned around on me with a speed even I couldn't follow and I felt myself lose balance and hit the ground. She was straddling me and placing her hands on my chest.

"Dead."

Her voice was barely a whisper from the exertion. Somehow the fact we could still get breathless from training felt strangely human. Rose's cheeks were flushed and I couldn't help but lower my eyes to her ampule bosom, rising and falling in rapid succession due to her labored breathing.

I was concentrating on a gash on her head which was healing in front of me. It was somehow fascinating and the little droplet of blood which escaped the gash once it was healed now held my attention. Every fiber in my being wanted to lick it off of her. However, that thought was interrupted by a large scream coming from the door.

I could only imagine what the guardian had seen. I was also surprised at the girly scream from the burly guardian. But maybe we were hearing it different because we were still in super sense mode. It also meant I now had a constant ringing in my ear from the loud scream. I saw Rose flinch and cover her ears.

After the guardian had fled we got up and surveilled the room. I hadn't noticed we had trashed the place but we had. Now it wasn't uncommon for us to break something, but this was different. Everything that had come into our path had been destroyed.

It took the guardians about a minute to organize themselves after the initial scream. Rose and I had returned back to normal and there was no sign of Strigoi attributes left. But I know we wouldn't be able to convince the guardian he didn't see it. Maybe we could compel him?

When about a dozen or so guardians were in the doorway stakes at the ready, I knew we were in trouble.

"Guardian Belikov, Hathaway? What happened? What is going on?"

They seemed confused. Yes they saw the destroyed room. It was definitely more than usual but I saw some of them shrug.

"I saw their red eyes, I did. I saw the cut on her forehead heal up. See there is still a bit of blood left where the wound used to be."

Rose wiped the drop of blood that had held my fascination off of her forehead. I suppose I would have to lick her fingers to get to it now.

Both Rose and I sighed deeply. I didn't know how to handle this.

"Rose, Dimitri, come to the large gym, everyone else stand down and follow."

I saw Hans in the back and I saw he wasn't amused.

When we were all sitting down he looked at us like we were two naughty school children. Ohh there is a thought for role playing. Rose in a sexy catholic schoolgirl costume. I cleared my throat hoping to clear my mind of the images, but now that our battle urges have been satiated I was now feeling other urges bubbling to the surface.

Hans set across from us and took a deep breath.

"I expected a bit more discretion from the two of you on this. I knew it couldn't stay hidden forever but a week? I have been trying to work out how to do this, but I suppose starting here is as good a place as any."

He turned to the other guardians. It hadn't escaped my notice that the guardian who saw us was sitting furthest away from us. Coward.

Hans explained to them what had happened to us. Well the short version without too much detail. They all just starred at us.

"Like they needed to get stronger."

There was a bitterness in the guardians voice I didn't like. Yeah I knew we were the best and I knew although most people respected us that there were some who were jealous.

So I stood up to my full height, towering over the guardian who looked visibly scared. I didn't need any Strigoi power to make him squirm.

"We didn't ask for this. We were forced. Held captive, strapped down and forced. It is a miracle we survived."

He looked away from me, a clear sign of submission. Also a sign of resentment. I knew most people would judge us with fear from now on. No longer seeing us as guardians like themselves fighting the good fight, but I never thought I would see people being envious of the power we held. Yeah it had advantages, but some powers aren't worth the sacrifice. It may not have taken our souls, but it definitely took a piece of our humanity.

"I know the circumstances were less than ideal. But obviously it did work. I am not taking it lightly but this could mean we could be fighting Strigoi on their own turf, this could change the outcome of the war."

I knew he meant no disrespect. And he was right, having Strigoi speed and strength combined with the rigorous training regime of a guardian meant we would have the advantage. Most Strigoi were ex-Moroi or ex-human, since both are more susceptible to the lure of eternal life. Most guardians that were turned were turned by force. But it wouldn't work, not only because any subjects other than us would die, but I suspect many would succumb to the power. It is hard staying grounded when you have the power of a God. And combine that with the intensifying need to fulfill instincts on a large scale you have a disaster. Having a soul doesn't mean you will use it. Rose and I both have experiences with darkness and I feel we can create a good middle ground. Not everyone here will be able to do the same, if they survived in the first place.

"Nathan tried it out on dozens of guardians before us and they died or were turned. We only survived because I am a restored Strigoi and because Rose was shadow-kissed."

Okay a little fib at the end but I wasn't going to tell them she was pregnant and I certainly wasn't going to tell them I was the father.

"But they have been working on a vaccine right, which makes us all resistant to turning. If we could combine that with that tattoo…"

"It wouldn't work. One because the vaccine is years if not decades away from being completed and because the knowledge of how to do these tattoos is not in our possession. And I doubt the alchemist will want to corporate with us."

"So you don't want to share your power, big shock."

The guy from earlier responded. I was about to respond when Rose stood up and walked over to him, a sweet smile on her face. To sweet.

"Of course we want to share our power. Like we always have. We will go out slaying on our own as to not endanger any more lives than we have to. We will still protect our monarch, we will sacrifice every part of our life for the greater cause, like we have always done, so you can sit back on your ass and be safe and sound on ward patrol duty. There is a reason we are as good as we are. Because we train, we fight, we die for the cause. In case you have forgotten I have died twice and Dimitri once. And what Nathan did to us should have killed us too. So don't come in here and tell us we don't want to share. We have given everything we are to the cause. What have you given?"

With that she got up and walked away. I followed her signaling to Hans he had to care of it from now on. I am sure there would be rumors going around court tomorrow.

"We had better get home to Lissa and Christian and tell them the extend of what Nathan did to us, before they hear it from someone else. Like guardian asswipe over there."

I nodded. Yeah we had put it off long enough. I think we both just wanted to feel normal and holding off on telling Lissa and Christian meant we could still pretend we were still the same. Even if we weren't evil and running around draining people, today made it very clear we changed. It also made it very clear we were alone. I had never been more grateful that we were having twins. They would have each other if for some reason we wouldn't be around anymore.

That afternoon there was a lot of questions back and forth from Lissa and Christina. Lissa actually cried when Rose showed her her eyes. Rose was trying to convince Lissa she was still the same. Trying to convince herself too. And of course we still were Rose and Dimitri, just slightly altered. It is strange feeling like yourself but not yourself. It was different from the Strigoi version of myself, even if there I also retained some of my personality traits. As a Strigoi I also gained some. The need for violence and cruelty was one of them. Now I didn't feel like I wasn't myself, I just felt less in control, more animal. Like the layer of humanity that has evolved over the past few eons was peeled away leaving only raw instinct. Those instincts were my own, just usually better hidden. I was glad Rose was feeling the same thing. Although truth be told, she was always more in tuned to her instincts. Not only acting rash but also following her gut feeling instead of overanalyzing everything. I had been stuffing all those things down for years under layers of control. For the first time since seeing my father here I was happy about his appearance. It did mean I could let go of the fear I would turn into him. It meant I could let lose the controls just a little bit to be not driven insane by my new found predator side.

Rose laid down next to me that evening. Usually she would snuggle up to me but now she just moved parallel to me and joined me at staring at the ceiling.

"We will need to feed soon."

I knew she was right. She was making small circles over her still very flat stomach.

"I know. How are you holing up, the twins take extra energy."

She shrugged.

"I am fine. They are still small so most of the energy I spend in today's session, but it is like an ever steady hum and I do feel it building. I just hope it won't get much worse when the pregnancy progresses."

I squeezed her hands.

"I'll ask Hans in the morning for possible Strigoi nests in the area. There usually are a few around court. Strigoi arrogance and all."

She nodded before she scooted over to me and snuggled up to me like she usually did. We fell asleep and even though we could both feel the hunger building, we also got rid of much pent up energy which made for a very good sleep.

So we were an hour away from court a day later. There had been reports in a small town of some mysterious deaths which the alchemist had dubbed Strigoi attacks. So we were hunting. I could feel the adrenaline hone our senses and the anticipation of a kill get the juices flowing. Somehow we could sense our prey now. Not in the shadow-kiss sense where Rose would get nauseous, but more in a compass way. A draw towards the carnage and cruelty they seemed to ooze.

Two of them were hauled up in an abandoned house in the bad part of town. It is strange that no matter how small a town is, there always seems to be a bad part of town and a good part of town.

We were stealthily moving towards the house when we heard a scream. No doubt an unwilling meal fighting against their fate. We didn't waste time and entered the building with a bang. The two Strigoi looked up and I could see some relief on the humans face. She thought she had been rescued. But when she took in our red eyes, her face fell and she fainted. Great.

"Get lost this is our meal."

Rose smiled next to me.

"We aren't here for her, we are here for you. Now let go of the human."

The Strigoi looked confused but he seemed to obey her. He was looking down at his hand as it was releasing the human. The look of fear and confusion on his face told me the action wasn't taken freely.

"Rose did you just…"

She looked at me a bit confused as well and back at the Strigoi.

"I don't know, maybe."

She turned back to the Strigoi and issued another command.

"Dance like a chicken."

I had to chuckle at that one, although if he did, we would know for certain he was indeed compelled. I heard the Strigoi growl and hiss but he did dance like a chicken. Rose started laughing and the other Strigoi was utterly confused and seemed nailed to the spot.

It seemed compulsion on a Strigoi was different. Their minds couldn't be compelled. When Rose compelled Viktoria she didn't even seem to know what she had done. Here they knew what they were doing and weren't very keen on doing it, they just had to. We could compel Strigoi's bodies.

"That… is kind of cool." Rose said as she pointed towards the Strigoi.

Well that was one way of putting it.

It took the Strigoi a few moments to snap out of it. Okay so the compulsion doesn't last long, but still good to know.

Rose engaged the Strigoi she just compelled while I went after the other. I decided to try out this new found power a bit.

"Stay."

The Strigoi gritted his teeth but stopped dead in his tracks. I walked around him and I could have drank from him then but I wanted more of a thrill. The predator in me wasn't satiated yet. I needed a chase. I haven't felt that inhuman in a while but the need was there and better to let it loose on a Strigoi than anybody else. I saw Rose have a similar reaction. She was toying with him, like a cat would toy with a mouse, the terrified pleas from him, egging her on.

I waited until the compulsion wore off, the entire time staring him in the eyes. All he could do was stand there and wait and imagine what I would do to him. The moment he could move again he sprinted towards the door, but I was there faster and slammed his head into the door. The scent of his blood filling the air and driving me further. I grabbed him by the neck and threw him through the wall. He was on the floor trying to flee from me. He was crawling on his hands and knees desperate to get away from me. I saw I had broken an arm and saw it now popping back into place. I leisurely walked towards him and picked him up and held him against a wall I hadn't destroyed yet. My fangs elongated and the fear was evident in his eyes.

"What are you?"

I didn't miss the trembling in his voice. Although I got a certain satisfaction from the irony of the situation where he was now as afraid as his own prey had been a few moments ago, I knew there was still a large difference between me and him. I didn't enjoy this, I would put him out of his misery instead of maintaining this cruelty. The feeling was different from my Strigoi days. I felt more like a cat chasing after a toy because it called to a certain instinct of chase inherited in all predators, there was no cruelty in our actions, only need. As a Strigoi I relished not only in the kill but the moments before where my prey was absolutely terrified. It filled a need for cruelty and came with its own high, but I didn't feel that here. A sign we may have turned into predators but we didn't become monsters.

It was a comforting thought as I sank my teeth in his neck and drained him. When I turn back around I saw Rose was done with hers as well. A small trickle of blood had escaped her mouth and was on the corner of her lips. I closed the distance between us and very carefully licked it off. She shuttered.

"Comrade, if you are going to continue it means we would destroy this place in our actions and we have a human to take care off."

I knew she was right so I pulled back and adjusted my pants to accommodate my erection. I had smelled Rose's arousal a moment ago and I knew that after we had dropped of the human with some alchemist we would have to find some release somewhere. Even if it did mean destroying a room or two and feeding from each other again.

Rose walked over to the unconscious woman and gently nudged her to wake her up. She was startled and immediately retreated against the wall when she saw us.

"It's okay, you're safe now, we aren't going to hurt you. We are getting you some help."

She seemed weary but Rose's words seemed to calm her down even if just a little. I took my phone and called the local alchemist. They would take care of her.

We stayed with her until the alchemists arrived. She was still as far away from us as she could get but she seemed to relax a bit after a few minutes since we hadn't killed or hurt her yet.