Sorry for not uploading sooner but after I posted the first chapter shit pretty much hit the fan over on my side of the screen so... yeah. Now I'm back. I'm going to post a quick chapter right now, to let you know this story is alive, for you all (which is actually a surprising amount) and then I will disappear for a short while to get you all much longer chapters with juicier content. I have a small outline of what is going to happen, which will get me through the first third of the story so updates shouldn't take too long.

"Kurosaki. Hey!"

Ichigo continued walking down the street, ducking his head slightly even though he knew there was no point in even attempting to hide, not with his hair color and height.

"Kurosaki!"

He should've known that Uryu would follow him after that little outburst. He should be touched, or even smug, that the Quincy was obviously concerned enough with his welfare to hunt him down after school hours. Yet, all he really felt at that moment was an extreme annoyance. Walking faster, a scowl crept its way across his face.

"Dammit, Ichigo! I know you can hear me! Stop walking already."

Nostrils flaring, Ichigo spun on his heel to stare at his unwanted, and rather irate, companion. Uryu stood only a few yards away. His typical ramrod straight posture was as straight-backed as usual with the only indication of his shout being his scrunched eyes. Ichigo noticed for the first time with a sick sense of amusement that the Quincy looked as if someone had shoved a large stick up his ass.

Covering his amusement with a low scoff, he ground out a quiet "What."

Ishida looked at him like he was the most ridiculous thing on the planet Earth, which only seemed to fuel his anger even more. He threw his arms out into the air, cocked his head back and groaned audibly. "Why are you looking at me like that, what do you want Ishida?"

Uryu's face fell into his typical blank expression, his eyes, however, turned cold. Ichigo wondered idly what he could have done to offended the obviously reproachful Quincy. Since the end of the war, their friendship hadn't wavered, even if their conversations led into the subject of Uryu's nightly activities of Hollow hunting. Sometimes Ichigo honestly did not want to bring up his loss of usefulness, or specifically, he didn't want to bring up his friend's usefulness. Selfish and childish, he knew, but he just couldn't help it.

When he didn't get a response, he shook his head and turned away, beginning the trek back home once again. This time he wasn't stopped.

No matter how hard he stared at the ceiling, the swirls never changed. He'd been like this since coming home from school, staring as if the ceiling would come alive and tell him what to do. Which, with everything that had happened in his life he wouldn't be surprised at this point. In fact, at the moment he'd probably welcome it.

He didn't know what to do.

To be fair, he could've imagined the whole situation, or maybe he drifted off during class again, or maybe-

Maybe he was back.

Which shouldn't be possible anymore, he had given up 'everything' that day. Absolutely everything. He didn't even want any of it anymore, he'd adapted to being normal for once in his life. He was enjoying it.

Yet a poisonous voice whispered in his ear, spinning tangled webs of truth and lies- he'd give anything to have it all back, anything to be useful again, to have a purpose instead of...he wasn't even sure. He was existing but it all felt hollow. Ichigo snorted slightly at the accidental pun.

So there he lay, spiraling in his thoughts, everything just repeating in an endless cycle of confusion and self-loathing. He wasn't even sure what time it was, he guessed maybe one in the morning. He felt a stab of guilt, knowing Karin and Yuzu were probably concerned at his behavior. Well, maybe not Karin, she was too used to his moods, but Yuzu would worry.

His sisters had been almost careful with how they handled him after that day, as if they expected him to fall apart or snap. (Which, to be honest wasn't that far off of how he felt most days). But still.

He groaned and ground the palms of his hands into his eyes. He really was a terrible brother.

Ichigo knew he wasn't getting any sleep tonight, and decided that he might as well study for his next class. He might as well try to learn something since he was pretty sure his teacher was going to write him off after today's class.

Naturally he fell asleep three questions in.

He wasn't sure where he was when he opened his eyes, it was dark, and the surrounding area was covered in a thick fog. His breath was coming out in a mist yet he didn't feel anything, the sensation of the sand between his fingers registered in his brain in a detached sort of way. He felt separated from his body and...wait.

Sand?

It was then he realized he was half buried in white sand, his legs completely submerged, the only thing being completely free was his head. Oddly enough he remembered going to the beach with his sisters and allowing them to give him a 'fish' tail while he reclined in the sun. He laughed a little to himself, still feeling strange but couldn't bring himself to care.

He figured he out to try to stand up, however, and attempted to do just that. Yet when he kicked out his legs to pull them from the sand- he couldn't. He tried to same with his arms and felt the sand 'grip' at the skin and, and-

Sensation came back in a rush, and he realized that the sand was dragging him further down, submerging him further. Adrenaline flooded his system as he kicked and flailed and cursed.

Ichigo didn't know why he was so terrified in that instant, but he was sure it was because he knew how frightening human he was at that moment. What would even happen to him if he died? No one ever told him what he should expect and honestly how would they know? He was a freak-

He cried out as the sand finally sucked him completely into the darkness, and he felt it run down his throat choking him as he clawed up and up and up, but it was no use because he felt the sand ripping him apart in all directions, absorbing his worthless, infuriatingly human body, but he kept screaming because he was still drowning, still dying and why wasn't he dead yet?

Suddenly he felt something grip him, whatever was left of him, through the sand, felt himself being pulled up and up and up until his head broke the sand and he gasped for air and-

He woke up.

For a moment he lay there, breaths shuddering out of his lungs as he tried to understand that he was okay, he wasn't falling apart and drowning and dying.

Then he retched on the floor beside his bed and swore he felt the phantom sensation of a hand on his, and a whisper of reassurance in his ear.

Thank you all for sticking around for so long, and welcome to any new readers. I'd appreciate any feedback ya'll feel like dropping. Have a wonderful day!