Another Chapter! Once again I don't own the characters, the only thing I own are my own ideas. I hope you enjoy this chapter! As always Review! Reviews make me want to write longer chapters faster! Reviews are also the reason that I update every day! Tell me if there is anything that you want to see happen in the story, as long as it doesn't mess with the plot I will try my best to add it! I think Clary and Jace are finally going to meet next chapter! Please be looking for a new chapter for this story every day!

My Hidden Self

Chapter Four: Conversations

Jace POV

Maryse comes in and gets me to tell me that it is time to go down to breakfast, and to say hi to Alec and Izzy before they go to school. I have been lying in my bed for about an hour when this happens, not sleeping just thinking, thinking about the same question for the entire time that I was thinking. Is there anyone else out there that is so messed up they can't even go to school? As I was thinking about that I was thinking about what I would do if there was. I was thinking about what their story would be like.

Why public school decided to have the first day of school be on a Friday, I'll never understand. I mean what is the point, really! I know it has been a while since I've gone to public school, okay more than while, but don't they start to tell you all of the rules and stuff on the first day? Then they continue on the second day? Why would they want have days in between that? It just doesn't make sense to me. With a sigh I heave myself off my bed, pull on a shirt and walk downstairs to see my siblings off to school.

When I finally get into the kitchen, where they all are eating breakfast, I pour myself a cup of coffee knowing that I won't be going back to sleep. After I set my coffee down on the table I go to get my breakfast. Today my breakfast is simply some Fruity Pebble cereal, I really don't feel like doing anything more elaborate or that actually involves cooking. Also, I'm pretty hunger and don't want to have to wait on food to cook.

As I sit down I look over at Izzy, and no not in that way you perverts, she is my sister! As I'm looking at her I'm trying to decide if she is dressed appropriately for school, she is dressed like school is a fashion show, as usual. She is one of the most popular girls in school apparently. She is dressed in short denim shorts, like really short, there is no way I'm going to let her go to school in those. She is also wearing a strapless white crop top? -Is that what it's called?- with a Sweetheart neckline?- again is that what it's called?-she has a rose colored cardigan on over it. She also has on a bronze colored choker with bronze bracelets. She also has on tall white heeled shoes. The toes on them are open- What is that all about? There is one thing that I know for sure, she is not going to school in that. "Hey Iz, I hate to burst your bubble, but you can't go to school wearing that?"

"Why not! I have a boyfriend Jace, I'm fine. I have to get to school early because I have to meet some of my friends and get my schedule." She says. "Oh and Alec, you might want to come too, Magnus will be disappointed if you don't get there early." With that, she walked out of the house to go to her car.

Magnus… Okay, I guess I need to explain this. My brother, Alec, is gay. Magnus is his boyfriend. I know why Magnus wants Alec there early. Magnus is… let's say very flashy with his clothing and hair. He wears glitter and rather extragant clothing. I think him and Izzy think on the same terms about clothing, even if it might be the only thing other than people that they want to see as couples. Magnus likes to try to give Alec some pizazz in his clothes, which are mostly plain jeans and old sweaters. I have to admit, I would never have thought that the two of them would've made a good couple.

Alec gets up from the table and waves goodbye at everyone. We all smile, wave back and say goodbye to him. I don't really know why we say goodbye, he'll be back sometime tonight, they both will. They typically both go over to their friends' houses after school. I guess that this would be a good time to say that Izzy is on the cheerleading team and Alec is on the football team. They have tried to get me to go make friends and hang out with them and their teams before, but I always decline. I sigh and tell Robert and Maryse, I still don't like calling them mom and dad, and they understand that, that I'm going upstairs to the music room for a while. They tell me that they will come looking for me at lunch. I tell them that if I'm not in the music room then I'm either in the movie room or my bedroom. They say okay and I head off.

I decide to go to my bedroom first so I can shower and change. Yes, I know, all that time that I spent just sitting there in bed thinking, I could've done that already, but that's just the thing. I was thinking, in peace and quiet, which doesn't come around often. I don't really get much uninterrupted time when I'm awake, Robert and Maryse are always checking to make sure that I'm okay. After I pull underwear, a plain black t-shirt, and some jeans out of my closet, I get in the shower. I wash my body with my usual Lemon scented body wash, don't ask me why I use lemon, I just do. After about 10 minutes in the shower I get out, dry off, and put my clothes on.

Once I'm dressed I decide that I need to head to the gym. I put a note on my bedroom door saying where I am so that they won't freak out. I know that it sounds like I'm really rich, but I'm not, I'm just an orphan that got adopted by a wealthy family. I turn on my music and exercise for a bit, not really caring that I'm wearing jeans. After I'm done exercising I head to the movie room. I get a pop from the fountain pop machine and put in The Hunger Games: Catching Fire it's one of my favorite movies. After I'm done watching that I just sit there in the cinema seats, thinking again. Why I'm thinking so much today, I don't really know. I think about what I would do if I ever met someone that would truly accept me for who I am. Someone that accepts all of my scars doesn't push me to talk about my past if I don't want to, and most of all, understands what it is like to fear going in public. I doubt that I will ever find someone like that, and even if I did, who is to say that they would even talk to me? If they are so scared of going in public and socializing, then why would they? Why would they just drop that to talk to me? Me? Of all people.

I don't know how long I sit there pondering about this but it is apparently a while because Robert comes in to tell me that it is time for lunch, I ask what they made, more for curiosity then hoping that it will be my favorite, because I don't have a favorite, I like everything they cook. I follow him down to the kitchen quietly. When we arrive, I see that they have cooked macaroni and cheese, with hot dogs cut up in it. Strange, this was the first meal that we ate after they adopted me.

We start off eating the meal in silence. After about 2 minutes, Maryse speaks up. "So, Jace, there is something that we want to talk to you about. We don't want you to freak out and we want you to keep an open mind about it." I just look at them knowing that one of them would continue, they don't beat around the bush about things.

"Alright, Jace," Robert starts. "We're starting to get worried about you. You hardly leave the house, at first we thought it was just because you were dealing with what happened to your parents and everything, but now we are really starting to get worried about Jace."

"What are you saying?" I ask, confusion clear on my face.

"Jace, we think you should go to the school meet and greet on Monday, It'll be a great chance to meet homeschooled kids that are your age and live in the area, some of them might be closer than you think, and there might even be one that understands you and accepts you more than you think." Maryse says.

"Also, we want you to find someone there that you would be willing to spend more time with, because we want you to hang out with them more after the meet and greet, this kind of behavior for a boy your age just isn't normal." Robert says.

I'm not a fan of this, but I'm not going to argue with them after everything that they have done for me, and this is really the only thing that they have asked me to do for them. "Alright, I'll go. I'll try to make a friend."

After we finish eating and finish our conversation, I go up to the music room. I want to play music, it'll help me think. Before I make my way out of the kitchen Maryse calls "Who knows Jace, maybe you'll even meet a girl."

Yeah right, at least Izzy would be happy with that though, she has been badgering me to get out there and meet someone for ages now. When I get upstairs and in the music room, I sit down at the piano and start to play. Suddenly I'm at a complete blank as to what song to play, or what I'm going to write, this is strange, this has never happened before. I guess my mind is just to active right now for the music. I go back into my room and think. If I did want a girlfriend, what would I want her to look like? I think about many possible combinations, but none of them seem quite right to me. I've never really thought about this kind of thing before. Suddenly I'm drifting into a nap, my last conscious thoughts are a silent prayer that this nap will be peaceful, unlike the last time I slept.

Sorry I'm not updating this at my usual time of the day! I'm also sorry for the short chapter. Anyway , what did you think? Did you like it? Love it? Hate it? Tell me in a review! Also I'm posting Izzy's first day of school outfit on my profile!