Awakening
(George's point of view)
One of the most frustrating things is ending up in a place and not knowing how you ended up there. Your mind is completely out of wack and it's hard to recall your last memory. How did I get here? Where the bloody hell am I? I stand up from the muddy ground and start to circle around the area. I was in an endless, dark, forbidden looking forest. Maybe this is the Dark Forest? Great, I now know where I am but why am I here? I look down at myself and see a dark black robe and pull on it. How did I get this on? I ingest a random, powerful, unknown force of air and a chill spread through my body. I didn't think much of it so, I pull my hood over my head and started to walk. Why do I feel so empty inside? I looked inside my robe pocket and felt my wand. Thankfully I would be able to protect myself if I run into anything dangerous. Monsters were all over in this forest so who knows what I will run into. The air seemed extremely thick and I couldn't hear anything, it is dead silent. How curious? The weird thing is I don't feel scared at all. I feel absolutely nothing inside. I was starting to think the chill wasn't the weather it was something else approaching, that was far worse than any monster.
Death.
I start walking in a direction that I felt as if I was being pulled to. I brush pass endless amounts of trees before ending up at a huge lake. The moon was shining so bright and was making the lake have a dim glow to it. I started to hear familiar voices and look across the lake. Hermione? It can't be her, why is she here? She could get hurt and then I felt an instant, agonizing pain shoot through my entire body. I drop to the ground for a second, grabbing my chest. What is happening to me? I stand back up and look again and hear Fred laughing. Why are they here? I start to walk onto the lake without realizing I might fall through it. But, what's interesting is I didn't fall through at all. As I walked across, the black water turned to ice. I walked closer to the center and stopped abruptly. I see Fred and Hermione kissing and the sharp pain hit me again and I grabbed my chest. Why is she with him? The pain started to become unbearable and I was getting angry. I started laughing silently to myself because how much agony I was in. My mind started to change, it became maliciously wicked. Suddenly the pain ended and I went back to feeling absolutely nothing inside. I smiled at the thought and then pulled out my wand. Without hesitation I pointed it at Fred and sent a green light his way making him go limp on top of Hermione. I hear her scream and talk to his lifeless body. It made me laugh again then I see her look at me. She screamed something and tried to make her way to me but I lifted my wand smiling.
"Avada Kedavra!"
I shoot up sweating uncontrollably throughout my whole body. Thank the heavens it was only a nightmare. What the hell is wrong with me? I would never, I could never, it was just a nightmare. They are even meant to be together in my dreams. I think I'm holding on to someone that is not meant to be mine.
"Thank Merlin!" Screamed Hermione grabbing me and squeezing me tight. "You have been asleep all day I was worried sick!"
I look out the window and see that it was night and I started remembering what happened. I had put a sleep charm on myself and everything came flooding back about Fred and Hermione. The memories forced their way back in my head instantly when I was trying so hard to forget it all. I couldn't even escape it in my dreams. I snapped out of my thoughts and look at Hermione. She had my face in her hands and she felt so warm. I look into her dark brown eyes and grabbed her face. She makes the women I've dreamed about look like trolly, short, slimed covered bimbos. That smile could light up and destroy any kind of darkness. I kissed her and let go, standing up from the bed.
"Don't get up George, you need to take it easy" she said standing up and walking over to me. She tried to grab my hand and I pulled away from her. "What's wrong?" She said with concern, trying to make eye contact with me.
"I think you need to go" I said looking down trying not to show the water in my eyes.
"What? Why?" She said sounding hurt and reached for my hand again.
"I said you need to go Hermione!" I pulled my hands away while screaming. I look up and get trapped into her eyes.
"What is wrong with you?" She said while her eyes filled with tears. I instantly felt like the most horrible git in the world. I immediately regretted snapping at her.
"Don't cry, please. Nothing as beautiful as you should ever cry." I said pulling her towards me and putting my forehead onto hers. I feel hot tears hitting and soaking through my shirt. I start rocking her side to side to calm her down.
"Why?" She whispered keeping her eyes closed.
"You know why love" I said running my hands through her hair.
"I love you" she said whimpering.
"Not the way I want you too. I think it is time for you to go tell Fred how you truly feel" I said feeling my heart sink and shatter into pieces. "I have been blocking the truth from my mind for too long, I can't do it anymore. I was ignoring everything because I wanted it to be the way I wanted. It's killing me inside to know that, you're not mine Hermione." My shirt started to soak up with her endless, silent tears and I put my arms around her waist.
"But" she started to say.
"Shhh" I whispered putting my finger on her lips. Our foreheads were still against each other and I put my hand back down and grabbed hers.
"I will always love you Hermione Granger" I said kissing her one last time. I could taste the ocean on her lips and it was sad to know this would be the last our mouths would ever touch. We sat there in silence swaying side to side for a moment. I wanted to tell her we could sneak out while everyone is sleeping and fly off into the night. We will start over the rest of our lives but, it will never be what she truly wanted. I could never live with that feeling, she deserves everything, even if I'm not the one to give it to her. I pull away from her and grab her hand. I lean down and kiss it. "Go to your knight my fair lady." She smiles while wiping the tears from her eyes and kisses me on the cheek. She pulls away from my hand and walks to the door. I see her look back at me and we just smile at each other.
"See you soon?" She said wiping the remaining tears from her eyes.
"You could never get rid of me Granger. Tell Fred if he ever hurts you it's not my wand he should be scared of" I said jokingly raising my fist in the air.
"Thank you George" she said shooting me one last smile before walking out. I hoped she would turn around and stay with me. I needed her to stay but, I heard her leave and I felt broken. I walk over to my bed and lay down staring out the window. Next thing I hear is a knock on the door.
"Hey buddy" whispered Charlie walking in with some glasses and whiskey.
"Charlie" I said sitting up off the bed.
"So, I didn't mean to over hear but.." He started to say sounding remorseful.
"No worries" I said standing up off the bed.
"Drink our sorrows away?" Charlie said handing me a glass.
"Definitely" I said taking the glass and then walking into the kitchen. He follows close behind me and we both sit down at his kitchen table. He pours us some shots and we both take them. This happens 4 or 5 times in silence and he stops. I ask for another and he hands me the bottle.
"You probably should take it easy George. I know you're hurting but" Charlie started to say.
"Charlie just shut it. You're an alcoholic so, what right do you have? Leave me be" I said coldly, cutting him off.
"Hey! I'm not an alcoholic, I just like drinking. Plus, I didn't mean for it to come out like that" he said apologetically.
"I'm sorry brother" I said solemnly pouring him a shot of whiskey. I take another shot of whiskey and then put my head into my hands. "I messed up everything. Why did I let her go?" I sighed running my hands through my red shaggy hair.
"Because in the end you knew she wasn't yours Georgie. It's really brave what you did. A lot of wizards are selfish for anything or anyone they desire, especially when it is someone they love. Willing to kill over it even. You gave her up for her sake and your brothers, ignoring your own? I admire that" he said waving his wand turning the stove on.
"My thoughts are destroying me. Why did it go this way? What makes life so difficult" I said laying my head down on the table twirling my wand.
"Life isn't the way we want it to be sometimes. Life can have other plans and that's what we're dealt. You'll be fine George, it just will take time. What makes life so difficult is the people brother, you can't hold on to this pain. You just have to be okay with not being okay and move forward. There are plenty of mermaids in the sea" he said casually, handing me a plate.
"Says a single, Dragon Master. What makes you an expert on love?" I said seriously, sitting up from the table.
"I'm not saying I'm an expert. Some females are vicious creatures, worse than dragons. I prefer taking care of dragons to be honest. I actually find it easier and less frightening" he chuckled putting a steak on my plate. "I had a true love once, she was everything to me but, life happened. She ripped my heart out and threw it to the werewolves."
"Charlie, I'm sorry" I said feeling awful not having any idea of him being with someone.
"Come off it mate. Like I said before, life happens and you just need to move forward. Dwelling on the past will lead to nothing but complete agony. It will eat at you faster than Grindylow on a fresh piece of meat. You will forget to live again if you dwell for too long" filling a glass and handing it to me.
"So, just move forward?" I said taking a drink from my glass.
"This never happened. It will shock you how much this thing between you and Hermione never happened" he said grimly.
"I don't want to forget this feeling or what happened. It's the happiest I had ever been. Yet, right now is the worst I've ever felt. But, I know you're right, I need to let her go. It's just going to take time" I sighed accepting the truth.
"Blimey! I drink to be merry but you're being a mopey git, it's bumming me out. Im definitely in the wrong company" he said jokingly.
"Shut it, Fred was always the leader and the sure of himself one. I kind of always thought I was the sensitive one. I guess I'm not hiding it very well right now. I always try to hide it but of course leave it to a girl to break me" I said admittedly. Charlie put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed it.
"Listen mate, you will find someone that makes you feel ten times the way Hermione did. Your love is out there somewhere just be patient. The Weasley brothers are extremely charming and our smiles work like magic."
"Thanks Charlie. You will find yours too" I said reassuringly.
"I think for now my heart belongs to the creatures of this world. One day though maybe my princess will come, only time will tell" he said laughing, letting go of my shoulder.
"You can show her your dragon" I said laughing hysterically.
"That's my end of the night pick-up line for the laddies. It works every time" he said laughing.
"Who could say no to a dragon?" I said and we both started laughing uncontrollably.
"Now enough with this girl-talk, let's drink our whiskies and get some food in these ruggedly handsome bodies!" He said as we both reached for our drinking glasses.
"Cheers!" We screamed in unison.
We drank until the sun started to rise and then headed to bed. I don't know what I would have done without Charlie being here to pick me up. I still feel sick to my stomach and my heart was aching but, he gave me hope. At least Fred has found his true love and Hermione found hers. I walk over to the bed while taking off my shirt. I crash on to the bed and look out the window. Even if I don't meet a girl who makes me feel the same way Hermione did, I'll be okay. I believe it is better to have experienced love then to never have experienced it at all. I'll hold on to the idea of a fairytale. Right now it's moving forward just, not quite there. I smiled at the thought and then slowly drifted off to sleep.
Nox