The aches and pains were all over, but nowhere more so than the legs. Koga tried to move. His body ignored his every command. He couldn't even open his eyes. Yet despite the pain there was a certain numbness and coldness. It felt like he was in water. No, not just in water, that he was deep underwater, like the bottom of the ocean. The pressure was unbearable. His limbs felt like lead. His throat was like sand paper, but he could feel himself breathing. So, he couldn't be underwater.
A sudden soothing sensation exploded throughout his body. It was like someone had suddenly lit the most beautiful firework in the darkness which was oppressing the wolf-nin. The sensation emanated in his ear. Someone was… Someone was stroking his ear. It felt so good. So much better than the stifling darkness. He tried to say it felt good, but his tongue felt like lead and his throat was a barren desert of dryness. He couldn't even swallow. Couldn't move still.
Then the light that was the firework turned off as his ear stopped being stroked. He was plunged back into darkness with nothing but pain. Pain and fear. He was so alone in this ocean. His body wouldn't listen to him. He didn't want to be alone. There was a constant droning. No, it was more like a buzzing. His ears seemed to have been freed from the curse that afflicted the rest of his body.
Koga focused on the quiet sensation feeling his ears. The harder he focused the louder it became. The buzzing turned to a murmur. The murmur into a melody. The melody into a thunderous waterfall. Too much, he dialed it back. Then he could make it out.
"-ant to be recognized sometimes," The soft feminine voice said. It was quiet. Filled with a deep sorrow. The voice let out a soft sob. Koga felt an aching in his arms. An ache that would have urged him to wrap his arms around the voice if his arms would listen to him. "Everyone just praises Sakura. They don't even see me. She wasn't in the forest holding your guts in. She didn't see that fear in your eyes." Another sob, then he felt a pressure in his hand. It was being squeezed.
Koga focused all his will onto that pressure then suddenly he felt everything. The numbness vanished all at once. It was unlike anything he had felt. The air caressed his body. It was filled with the subtle scent of flowers, earth, salt and… That hospital smell. Is that where he was? He couldn't remember anything. But that taste. His mouth was incredibly dry and it tasted like when you didn't brush your teeth all day. Even as he thought of it his mouth began salivating. He left it to its work.
Then there was the pain. Oh, the pain. It had been there even before he could feel anything else, but now it was so terrible. The worst of it was concentrated in his legs. Then what happened to cause his predicament came in quick flashes. The fight, the chase, the explosion… He remembered dying. Almost dying, he had applied that jutsu. Then the pain. It had been worse then. Was he dead? No, that angel had come. Whereas everything was a blur he remembered her face like it was etched into stone. The fair skinned beauty with the black eyes and short raven hair.
Then it felt like someone had dumped a bucket of water onto him. He focused on the sensation and it grew more muted. Not a bucket of water. Just a drop. Then another and another. Like the softest rain. But also, the saddest. They were tears.
"I just feel so alone sometimes. It doesn't help that she doesn't deny what people say too. They are taking this away from me," the voice cried softly. He recognized the voice now. It belonged to that angel. The one who had saved him. He willed his eyes open, and this time they listened. It seemed so bright, but as his eyes adjusted it turned out to be the exact opposite. It was late at night and the room was dark. His eyes were well suited to the darkness and they began to reflect the little light they collected back through his retina again and again. It was something nocturnal animals were capable of and his eyes, like his ears, were that of a wolf's.
They glowed in the darkness and his angel came into view. She sat next to his bedside in some sort of chair. Her head was downcast and the hair obscured her face. But they didn't stop the tears. She was holding his hand. For her comfort or his own? He wanted to speak to her, to tell her he was listening. That he knew who had saved him, but it was so hard to gulp the saliva down that had finally gathered in his mouth.
She squeezed his hand. Yes, he could do that. He squeezed back. Her head shot up and her eyes stared into the darkness coming to rest on his own shimmering orbs. She shot up from her chair and he knew she could see his yellow shimmering eyes studying her. Even in the darkness her face was so red. She shouldn't be so embarrassed.
"You are awake," Shizune gasped aloud, her tears forgotten. She tried to let his hand go and turn away, but he tightened his grip. She looked back at him and then down at his hand. She colored a little, but didn't seem to try to stray away. Koga finally managed to clear his throat a little, then swallowed hard. The saliva slowly lubricated the important organ and he felt his mouth respond better to his commands.
"I don't know who those people are, but I will never forget who it was that saved me," Koga spoke to the woman. The words were nice, but sounded so scratchy.
"Oh my," Shizune said coloring at the words, "Oh no, how long have you been awake?"
"Would it make you more embarrassed if I said, since you were stroking my ear?" Koga asked softly. It did. Her face went from being just a little red to the same color as a tomato, except all over. Her hand suddenly felt so incredibly hot, but he didn't want to let it go.
"I am so sorry! Someone should check you over, but I can't. I am so unprofessional. I am so sorry. I will get someone for you," Shizune stammered out turning again, but he wouldn't let that hand go. Instead he tugged on it a little. He was losing focus, but he didn't want to be alone. He was so tired and scared that the darkness would swallow him up again.
"No," Koga managed after a short silence, "I don't want to be fussed over tonight. I want you to stay, please sit back down." His voice was pitiful. Like he was going to cry. The wolf-nin who usually had so much control felt so vulnerable before that woman. It felt good.
"Please, tell me your name," Koga rasped, then let out a little cough. A hand immediately shot up to his forehead, but something obstructed it. A bandage. He remembered getting slashed across his forehead during the fight.
"It is Shizune," The woman finally replied and the name wrung throughout his head seeming to reverberate throughout his being. He would never forget it. He could feel the hand move from his forehead to his cheek, cupping it. It felt so affectionate. His own face heated up and he began to sweat. He had never been touched like that. By caring hands. It was embarrassing and felt so good.
"Oh, no. When did this fever come about," The woman wondered feeling more of his cheek. "I can get you something for this, you might have an infection. Koga squeezed her hand. It felt like it was a million degrees in the room suddenly, but he knew it wasn't from fever. His voice didn't want to come out, but he forced it. Better to admit embarrassment than be alone again.
"It isn't a fever," His voice managed. It caused Shizune to furrow her brow in confusion. "I have never been fussed over like this by such an angel." His wanted to smack himself. What the hell voice? First you don't want to work, then you say too much. The room got just a little bit hotter, but not just for him. Shizune was that tomato color again. It was so cute.
"Th-thank you," Shizune murmured quietly. "For the compliment, and the kind reassurance. I didn't mean to heap my troubles on you. I will let you rest okay? I won't send anyone to bug you tonight, but tomorrow we need to talk about your condition." He squeezed her hand tightly in case she tried to pull away again.
"Don't. Don't go," His voice was choked with fear and emotion. The woman studied his face. He wondered what she could see. It must be so dark for her in that room, but she nodded. "Please talk to me more."
"Okay," Shizune nodded a redness had seemed to permanently settle in her cheeks, but the worry started to fade from her face. It was replaced by happiness, maybe even bliss. A smile covered her face and she spoke again, "You can see me so well right now can't you, even through this darkness."
"Yes," Koga replied, "My eyes and nose go with my ears." She seemed to understand, but just the mention of his ears made her color again. He suddenly felt a rumbling in his chest as light laughter came out. It hurt so bad, but he couldn't help it. He couldn't stop laughing for just a few moments. Eventually the pain did force him too and he closed his eyes in pain laying back on the bed.
"No don't do that," Shizune urged stroking his face again out of reflex, "You need to be still."
"Sorry, I shouldn't have laughed," Koga admitted opening his eyes again, "but anyway. They are fluffy, I understand the desire to touch them." He wiggled the wolf ears poking through his hair a little in response. This time Shizune found herself laughing, but a few tears welled up in her eyes, whether from the laughter or her earlier sorrow, Koga wasn't sure.
"You need rest," Shizune spoke into the darkness with the beaming smile of hers.
"Okay, I will try," Koga replied closing his eyes again, but he was so afraid. The fear filled his voice again, "But please don't leave. Sit down and tell me more about your day." She did. She sat right back down and began to talk about her day. It was small stuff at first, but having already spilled her deepest worries into his lap, she talked about those too. Told him every little thing. How she felt so tired of being alone. How she felt she was past her prime. How she felt so undervalued by her peers. The way she felt trapped in the shadows of her master Tsunade and her peer Sakura.
He listened intently, but he felt weak. He was tired and he felt himself begin to drift back to sleep. But almost as if anchoring him, her hands remained wrapped around his own as she shared those fears with him. She kept on talking until well after he had fallen asleep.
He didn't know how long he had been asleep for, but he felt warm and comfortable. It didn't last forever, and his eyes slowly cracked open. He hissed a little as they adjusted to the brightness again. Except this time, it really was bright. The morning sun penetrated through a window nearby. The room was unlike most hospital rooms in that regard. Instead of the larger, multi-patient rooms, he was in a small private room. He imagined that was because of his status as a shinobi of another village.
Koga glanced down as his ears filled with a soft snoring. A smile creased his lips at the sight he found. Shizune was still there, sitting in that chair. At some point, she had pulled it closer, and was even now leaning forward and using his arm like a pillow. Her own arms were wrapped around his. Koga was surprised at the flurry of emotions. He felt happy, comforted, liked, but there at the back of his head was that nagging voice telling him he didn't deserve it. Not even for a second.
The woman stirred a little and a yawn escaped her lips as she nuzzled into his arm for a second. He watched as her brow furrowed and her hands began feeling up his arm. Then her eyes shot open as realization hit. Those dark eyes stared straight into his own piercing animal-like eyes. Her cheeks colored having been caught in such an embarrassing act and she removed her face from his arm. He immediately missed the warmth.
Before she could go anywhere he latched onto her hand again. A small smile creased her lips as that blush settled back in, but there was worry creasing her brow as she studied him. She pulled away from the hand and he felt a small panic. She tugged from the hand harder and giggled at him.
"Hey, you said I couldn't fuss over you last night, but I'll be damned if I shirk my duties today too. I need to check you over and we need to discuss your condition. I am not going anywhere so don't worry," Shizune tugged at the hand again and this time Koga let it go. She rummaged through a bag he couldn't see next to his wayside and came away with a stethoscope. She ran the cold metal over his chest causing him to look down since it felt like he was naked. He was pleased to see that he wasn't. It was just the paper thinness of the hospital gown. His cheeks colored again as he wondered who had changed him and where his clothes were.
"Take a deep breath for me please," Shizune requested. That smile had never left her face and it was contagious causing Koga to smile widely. He did as she asked. Then questions came.
"How long have I been asleep?" He asked her as his free hand traveled up to his face to scratch at his chin.
"About four days now," Shizune said and Koga felt relieved. Briefly, he had been in fear that he had been sleeping for years in some sort of coma. But as his hands explored the light stubble on his face there was more confusion. He grew hair abnormally fast, especially facial hair. He should have half a beard by now, but it was only a light stubble. Like he had been shaved just last night.
"Did you?" Koga began to ask causing the woman's cheeks to color a little more.
"Uhm," Shizune sucked her bottom lip into her mouth, chewing on it as she listened to his heart. She removed the stethoscope and offered a nervous smile, "Chōjūrō said you liked to be clean shaven and your hair grows fast and I didn't want you to be uncomfortable and I just-"
"Thank you," Koga said cutting off her nervous stammering and reassuring her, "He is right, I hate that beard. Makes me look older like some ancient sage."
Shizune smiled and went over some of the various monitors he realized were hooked into him. He glanced down his own body and noticed his casted legs.
"How much do you remember about what happened?" Shizune asked looking into his eyes with worry.
"Bits and pieces," Koga admitted sitting up a little even though it pained him. Shizune assisted him, placing a pillow behind his back. "I remember the blast, the pain, and some of the injuries and I remember you healing me. Then I felt like I was being poisoned, but…" His cheeks colored again, "You told me the poison was okay and then I don't remember anything."
Shizune looked away in a little embarrassment, but she steeled her nerves well looking back at him. "It wasn't poison, it was anesthetic!" She said this loudly almost in disbelief, but she did giggle a little. Koga shrugged his shoulders a little.
"It is a defense mechanism for poison. I didn't know what our enemy was equipped with and they had already cut me once, so I was using a jutsu to filter any poisons. I guess it thought that anesthetic was poison," Koga smirked.
"That is an interesting jutsu," Shizune smirked, a user of poison herself, "but I could teach you a better one." Koga felt his lips curl up in amusement. She was skilled in medical jutsu, so he didn't doubt her.
"Maybe you should," Koga replied with a small smile.
"But if I teach you that, you need to teach me that jutsu you used to strengthen your body," Shizune demanded half-heartedly. As she fussed over him some more.
"I suppose that is the least I could do, for you saving my life," Koga replied with another shrug. He could tell she wanted to say something to him. "You already told me all your darkest fears, so just spit it out," Koga challenged. Shizune studied his face for a moment and he saw some pain enter her expression briefly.
"It is about your legs," Shizune began and Koga found his eyes drawn to the casted legs. "Your jutsu was able to save them from being turned into pulp by that tree, but much of your bones were horribly cracked and splintered. We can't repair the damage because we don't understand all of your wolf-like anatomy. Also, even if we did, I don't think we can fuse the bone together the correct way with how bad it splintered."
"Hey, don't worry," Koga urged closing his eyes for a moment feeling his legs with his mind. They were in a lot of pain, but he could feel all the little fragments. "I think I can pull all the bone together and work all the fragments back in. I won't be able to do it all at once though and it is going to hurt like fuck. I don't want to do that right now."
"What?!" Shizune asked in disbelief, "What do you mean pull your bone together?"
"That jutsu you mentioned," Koga explained, "I can use it to move the bones back into place."
"I thought it worked because you used your chakra like a glue or gel to help reinforce everything," Shizune theorized aloud, "But that isn't consistent with what you are saying. What kind of kekkai genkai is that." Koga glanced around the room and noted it was empty. Then the closed door. Normally, he wouldn't reveal his secrets to anyone. He didn't feel like Shizune was just anyone though. She had bared her heart the night before and saved his life. He felt like he could trust her with his secrets.
"I will tell you, because I need help and I trust you to keep a secret," Koga began and seeing her nod he continued, "The jutsu isn't a kekkai genkai or anything special like that. It is just an advanced form of chakra control. I lack the necessary chakra for a person of my rank. While I can perform several high level jutsu, I quickly become exhausted. As an example, I only used two very high level jutsu and am still suffering the effects of chakra exhaustion. So instead of working on more high level jutsu, I focused at a young age on nothing but chakra control."
Shizune fussed over him a little, situating tubes as she listened in small understanding. "That is like myself," Shizune admitted, "But I worked on medical jutsu, I don't understand what you do."
"It was a small jutsu I developed to overcome my lack in ranged ability. I am very skilled with a blade and can combine it with chakra and use it for far longer because it requires a lot less chakra than flashy ninjutsu. But I needed a way to close with the enemy to effectively use my blade and that meant avoiding and possibly sustaining impacts from powerful jutsu. So, I developed a technique that complimented my lack of chakra reserves," Koga explained to the best of his ability.
"Since I don't have a lot of chakra, controlling it is much easier for me. So I used this advanced chakra control and applied it to my body to see if I could subtly alter the composition of my cellular structure. It took a lot of trial and error, but the jutsu was explained to me by my father and I slowly figured it out over many years. I am now able to loosen the bone structure to make it more pliable. If I was going to suffer from a light impact I could make the bone softer so it would give under the strike. That way it would bend instead of breaking. Or like when the log crushed my legs I could condense the bone so it was thick like metal and resistant to the constant pressure and weight of the log."
"So, you can manipulate things inside your body," Shizune raised her eyebrows in disbelief. "You were doing it with your blood too, condensing it around your vital organs to keep from hemorrhaging out. That doesn't sound much different from medical jutsu."
"Yes, to the blood, but no to the medical jutsu. I don't know about that. While this technique allows an absurd control of my bodily functions the one thing it doesn't do is heal," Koga stated with a small sigh, "I never learned those sorts of techniques and they would require too much chakra exertion anyway preventing it from being effective in combat. All I can do is control the structure of my body itself, I can't accelerate its functions. Think of it like a rope with a knot. I am able to loosen the knot and make the rope more flexible, or I can tighten the knot and strengthen the rope."
"That is incredible," Shizune announced her mind running away with the possibilities. "So, you could actually use this chakra control to piece together the bone inside of your body. If you could do that I could fuse the bone together with my medical jutsu." Koga offered a little smile.
"It isn't exactly going to be that easy," Koga chided, "I have to be off this morphine and it is going to hurt extremely bad. Worse, this kind of finer manipulation will be very tiring. It would probably require numerous treatments a week over the period of a month."
"Sounds like a plan to me," Shizune beamed. "I was afraid you would never be able to walk again. How is your stomach feeling?"
"Tight," Koga said in confusion, then he remembered his gut wound and turned green, "You fixed that?"
"Sakura and I did," Shizune nodded, "Tightness is to be expected. A lot of the flesh there is fresh, but it didn't become infected and should all be working. Do you think you could try to eat and drink something?" Koga offered a small nod feeling that overwhelming hunger, but not the thirst, he imagined because of the IV.
"Okay, I will be right back. I am going to get us some breakfast, then you can explain some of this technique to me while we eat okay?" Shizune offered her eyes glowing with happiness.
"Yeah, that sounds good," Koga nodded. At that moment, it did feel good to be alive, but there was that voice in the back of his mind telling him he didn't deserve a woman like Shizune's attention.