Trigger warning.

The two ended up making their plans to go the resort to take place on a Saturday a few weeks away.
The way it had been arranged, Maura would pick Jane up from work in the morning (as she had the night shift) and they would continue on driving from there. Jane figured she could grab a quick coffee along the way and that should be enough to sustain her. These weren't ideal circumstances but, between both of their work schedules, it was the best that they could come to.

•••

On the way to the precinct, Maura stopped by Boston Joe's to get Jane a coffee. She had them pour an extra shot into an espresso cup in case she needed an extra kick. She also picked up one of their pear and raspberry breads that Jane was always raving about. Had anyone asked, Maura would have pegged her as more of a banana bread girl, but even Jane could be surprising. She also got herself a freshly squeezed juice. She'd already eaten breakfast, but a fresh juice never went amiss in Maura's day.

As she waited in her car parked out the front of the BPD building, she took a deep breath of fresh hair as the sun shone on her face. She couldn't have asked for a better day. It was a couple of minutes before Jane finished, so she figured she had some time to spare. She wriggled into a comfortable position, closed her eyes and took deep, regular breaths.

In the locker room after her shift, Jane was desperately cramming her belongings into an already full bag. Once she finally managed to get everything in and close the zip, she rummaged for the deodorant in her locker. She figured it'd make for a better start to the day if she didn't smell like stale sweat. She then gave herself a quick once over in the mirror, grabbed her bag, thrashed the locker closed and headed up to the lobby. She had changed into a t-shirt and running shorts because that was the most comfortable thing she could think of wearing for a road trip. Maura said this place was about an hour and a half away, and there was no way she was going to do an hour and half sitting with minimal space to manoeuvre in her police uniform.

Walking up toward the car, she noticed that Maura was paying attention and raised a fisted hand to the glass of the window.

'tap tap tap'

Maura practically jumped out of her meditative state as Jane tapped harshly on the window pane.

Even though she knew it was unlocked, she thought it would be more entertaining to scare the leaving daylight out of Maura.

Maura gave Jane a displeased look before gesturing to get into the car.

As she opened the car door, Maura was quick with a feigned threat; "I guess I could just drink your coffee…" She warned playfully.

"No!" she begged. "I'll be good," she pled jokingly.

Maura's insincere annoyance quickly turned to a smile as it returned to her excitement about the trip.

"I don't think you realise how much I love you right now. God I need this coffee," she practically whined. Her tone rapidly changing to genuine gratitude, she added kindly, "Thank you, Maur'."

Maura smiled, "You're welcome." She glanced into the back seat for a moment and reached her arm out to get something off the chair. Turning back around she said, "Here you go," holding out a brown paper bag. "I thought you could use some sustenance."

Jane smiled excitedly at the mysterious bag of food; at least, she hoped it was food. As soon as she opened it she actually squealed before exclaiming, "Apple raspberry bread!?" She looked at Maura, and her eyes were glistening with happiness. "You shouldn't have! I mean, thank you, but … aw, you shouldn't have."

Maura simply smiled before starting the car. "Enjoy it. The trip can be a little tedious, and I figured that, after an all-nighter, anything would be beneficial."

With that, they were off.

About half an hour into the drive, conversation began to peter as Jane's remaining energy from her shift started to diminish.

"So, how was school this week?" She asked, quite lazily.

"It was good, thank you. The students were mostly tamed, which was rather a relief, and I had this to look forward to all week." An honest smile grew on her face as she added that final part.

Jane too smiled. She was excited… if a little tired.

Maura could see this out of the corner of her eye and said, "Feeling a little worn-out from your shift?"

"Nah," she blatantly lied. "I'm excited too!" She meant the words, but her eyes deceived her.

Maura smiled small. "Why don't you have a sleep? I'll wake you when we get there."

"Nah, it's fine," she said, with eyes already closed. "I want to talk to you."

Maura just smiled without saying anything. She hoped the quiet may help Jane stop fighting and get some much needed rest.

•••

"Jane," she said softly as she gave the palm of her hand a light squeeze. "We're here."

Jane very slowly came to, and figured out what had happened. "I fell asleep, didn't I?" She said hazily.

Maura giggled a little. "Yes, but don't worry; we have a quiet morning," she smiled.

As they got out of the car Jane was amazed by the immensity of the block of land. Smack bang in the centre of it was this great big brown brick building with neatly kept garden surrounds and balconies on, what seemed like must have been, every room. "Wow," was the only thing she got out.

Maura just smiled. "It is a lovely property, isn't it?" She looked over to Jane who was still a little taken back. "Come on," she nudged as they headed for the entrance.

As they entered the lobby, the place seemed brightly lit with slightly minimalistic décor.

"I love coming here," Maura said quite honestly and contentedly. "It's so peaceful, and rejuvenating." A quiet smile crept across her face.

Jane didn't know what to be more in awe of, the establishment or the woman who brought her here. She simply smiled in acknowledgement before asking, "So, what is the plan for the morning anyway?"

"Well," she said happily. "We'll check-in, go to our room and get settled, then we can have a lunch and then we can just go from there." Maura had actually planned out most of their afternoon to the minute, but figured it wasn't exactly rocket science and there was need to overwhelm Jane immediately after she arrived.

"Okay, cool," she said agreeably. Suddenly though, she realised what Maura actually said… room. As in, one. As in, one bed, one bathroom and one everything else. It's not that she was against the idea of getting intimate with Maura, it was just sudden. They hadn't really done more than kiss the other's cheek (even if they were dangerously close to the lips), or sort of brush against each other with arms and/or hands.

Maura watched Jane's face become somewhat paler than before and grew quite concerned. "Are you alright, Jane?" She said caringly.

Jane shook off the feeling as best she could and said, "Yeah, sorry. Just tired." She forced a smile as she looked Maura in the eye.

Maura didn't quite believe her, but she figured it wasn't really a conversation to have in the middle of the lobby, so she left it alone for the time being. She smiled unconvincingly, and said, "Just let me check us in, and then we'll head up."

Jane was thankful that Maura looked away to the neatly groomed woman behind the counter because the idea of going up to their room wasn't as comforting as Maura might have thought.

•••

"Here we are," Maura said pleasantly. "208."

By the time they had made it to the door, Jane had managed to keep a straight and, hopefully, unsuspicious face.

As they walked into the room, they were greeted by a large neutral colours-themed lounge room. Cream carpet, off-white leather lounge, and light beige curtains affront tall French windows.

"Wow," Jane uttered involuntarily.

Maura simply smiled, pleased that Jane liked the room.
"So this is the living room, the kitchen is to the right, and our rooms are on opposite sides of the apartment," she stated. "Will a queen-size bed be sufficient?"

Jane choked back a laugh when she heard the question. "Yes, I think it'll be fine." Jane was also far more at ease now that she knew that had separate bedrooms. She certainly wasn't against getting close with Maura, as mentioned before, but she just wanted to be comfortable with it when it happened. She dumped her duffle on the ground by the wall and allowed herself to relax into the idea of this trip.

She hadn't noticed, but Maura had intently watched her as she had done so, waiting for the appropriate opportunity to ask Jane a question and soothe both her concern and curiosity. "Are you alright, Jane?" She asked, pacing her words as to not 'spook' her.

Jane practically flinched out of her almost-dazed state. "Wha- Yeah!" She insisted. Although she was more alright now than before, she was still finding it difficult to cover up the fact that a few moments ago she had been royally freaking out.

Maura pressed on. "Really?" she asked as kindly as she could though, obviously, not believing a word of it. "Because a moment ago I could have sworn you had just seen a ghost…"

Jane simply denied it though whilst thanking Maura for her concern, and went on to deflect to a lighter and far more pleasant topic; food. "What's for lunch?"

Something was clearly going on with Jane, but decided to leave it alone once again. If Jane wanted to share anything, she convinced herself that she would. "There is an extensive menu available downstairs in the dining area. For now, though, go to bed. It's been a long night for you," Maura put forward friendlily.

"No…" Jane practically whined. "We came here to do things, not so I could sleep," she insisted. "Come on, what's up first?"

"Jane," she said in a very calm and logical voice. "Our plans for the day have been made to allow some sleeping time in the morning," she smiled caringly. "I'm a teacher," she stated. "And while that may not involve too many all-nighters, there are certainly many late nights. So relax, go rest," she smiled. "I brought some work to do anyway," Maura reasoned.

Jane, utterly taken back by the consideration Maura had put into this, decided that rather than getting all mushy about it, she would take her usual, slightly more sarcastic approach. "Oh no! I'm not sleeping just so you can do work. That's not why we're here either," she maintained. "We'll watch T.V or something and talk. Come on," she said dragging Maura by the arm to the lounge.

Maura giggled. "Fine," she feigned dismay. "I doubt this was a fight I was going to win anyway," she pursed her lips knowingly.

"Nope," Jane replied childishly.

"After all, your ability to process information rationally is significantly lower when sleep deprived," she added factually.

Jane was impressed that Maura knew all that and was able to convey it so eloquently and efficiently, yet she still couldn't stop herself from saying playfully, "does your brain ever shut down?"

"The brain is alwa-" Realising the error of her ways, she smiled and simply shook her head.

Sitting down on the lounge, Jane picked up the small wicker basket of remote controls that sat on the coffee tables. "Five remotes?!" She exclaimed. "What could anyone need this many remotes for?"

"May I?" Maura said politely holding out her arms.

"Be my guest."

Without having to do some lengthy trial and error tests, Maura immediately picked up two remote controls and pressed the power button on each, pointing them towards the television.

Jane was gobsmacked. "H… How did you?" She was at a loss for words.

Maura simply smiled and said, "This one is to turn the screen of the television on, and this one controls the channels from the box just below."

•••

Maura held out a pristinely-folded white bath robe. "Once you're changed, you can place your clothes in either of these lockers and we'll head off to our first activity," she said excitedly.

"Can do," Jane said agreeably. Nearly before she had finished speaking the words, Maura had begun getting undressed right where they stood. She did it tastefully, as not to cause anyone an unwanted eyeful, but still. "Oh," she said softly.

"Is everything alright?" Maura asked, noticing Jane's immediate discomfort.

"Oh, yeah, I just…" Jane looked around in search of a cubicle.

Maura simply smiled kindly. "Just down past this row of lockers, and to the right. Please don't feel as if you have to change here." She meant it, too.

"Thank you," she practically sang before disappearing around the corner.

Maura was someone who had many experiences of spas just like this one. She remembers when she went to her first one at 16 with her mother, she thought it so bizarre and embarrassing that people actually got changed in the middle for all to see. They wouldn't even try to hide it. She insisted on using the cubicle or getting changed in her room. It wasn't until she was in her early twenties that she even entertained the idea of it. Now though, it was just normal for her. She in no way wanted Jane to feel uncomfortable though.

•••

"Who knew that something called 'Sea Captains' would actually be not awful?" Jane laughed as they wandered through the garden after having a back massage and a facial.

Maura giggled a little before adding with a smirk, "I'm a little surprised there wasn't a sailor joke in there.'

Jane smiled knowing exactly what Maura was implying and simply said, "Yeah, I thought about it but it just seemed too easy."

"Mhm…" she said, still not entirely convinced that Jane had it out of her system. But, it was only just dusk and figured there was still plenty of time for it to rear its head.

"I mean, the whole getting poked by a stranger wasn't exactly an appealing idea but it wasn't bad," she said honestly. Her voice deepened to a posher and slightly more sensual tone when she said, "And I don't know what they did but my skin feels fabulous!" There was a notable amount of sardonicism as she commented on the facial they'd had.

Maura giggled once again, before easing into a comfortable smile. "Well, despite your mocking, I am glad you enjoyed it. Or, at least, didn't find it awful," she nudged.

"I'm just holding out because I'm sure there's something in our future that we'll do even though you hate it," Jane verbally jabbed.

Maura knew she was kidding though, and simply said (with a little smugness), "I mean it." She smiled honestly as she looked into Jane's eyes to try to gauge her response.

Her first instinct was to flee after the first sign of intimacy, but Jane managed to fight against it and stick her heels in. She still tried to play it off though; "Yeah, yeah…" Before adding remarkably honestly, "me too." She smiled before looking forward along the path again.

Without so much as mistaken step or fumble, Jane's pinky had begun to wrap itself around Maura's as they walked and talked. When it happened, Maura glanced down at their hands and looked up to Jane's face with a very contently peaceful smile.

Jane tried to play it cool though, simply giving a little knowing smile of acknowledgement before allowing the conversation to continue on as their fingers remained entwined.

•••

"Are you hungry?" Maura asked pleasantly.

"Mm… Yeah, I could eat. You?"

"I was thinking we could get room service instead of going down to the dining room," she suggested. "I figure, we're both already in our pyjamas…" She added, gesturing to her satin button-up pyjama set that she was currently sporting and to Jane's cute little checked shorts and singlet ensemble.

"No!" Jane said a little guiltily. "We can get changed and go be social!"

Maura simply laughed. "Jane, it's quite alright. Besides, unless you particularly want to, I'm quite comfortable to just relax up here. Wouldn't want to ruin my manicure," she joked nervously, playing off any connotations that may have come to Jane's mind.

Jane thought for a moment, trying to decide how honest Maura was being about not going out for dinner, even if out was just downstairs. "Mm… Only if you're sure." She watched carefully, awaiting a response.

"I am sure," she said with a smile as she held out a leather bound room-service menu.

Jane grabbed the menu a little too excitedly, she found in hindsight, as she managed to chip the clear nail polish that Maura had strong-armed her into getting less than 2 hours ago. "See!" she joked lightly. "This is why I don't wear nail polish." Her face crinkled as she became openly a little annoyed that it happened. She wasn't entirely fond of getting her nails done in the first place, but now that it had chipped it just made it seem so much sillier.

Maura simply smiled a small and unjudging smile, and said, "I think I have some nail polish remover in my bag. We can get it off once we order some food." Sure, she was a little disappointed, but she knew that manicures were more her thing than Jane's and was still glad to have done it with her.

Her words were so remarkably sincere. It actually surprised Jane a little that she was so understanding even though she'd essentially just snubbed something that Maura enjoyed and did regularly (to an extent). She smiled as if to say thanks in a very honest way. Always quick to cover up her feelings though, she said, "So, what d'ya wanna eat?"

"Hm…" She said, once again perusing the menu idly. "I was thinking the grilled halibut with the peach and pepper salsa."

"You know," she remarked in a slightly astonished tone. "That actually sounds really good." Jane was a little surprised to herself say that, just as much as Maura was.

"Would you like one? I'd be happy to order two of those," she said courteously.

"Nah, thanks though," she smiled politely. "I was actually thinking of having a steak Diane," she smiled reminiscently. "I haven't had that in ages. And then I thought I'd get some of their rosemary fries, but only if you wanted some?"

"I usually eat healthy when on a spa retreat, but their fries are delicious," she said indulgently. "I've only ever had them once before, but I will more than happily share a serve with you tonight," she smiled.

"Cool, I guess that's done then. Do you want me to order and you can pick something to watch?"

"Sure," she said politely.

Jane headed for the phone and waited patiently after dialling reception's number. As she waited, listening to a piece of music she decided had only ironically been referred to as 'soothing', Maura disappeared out of sight. Jane wasn't sure where or why she'd gone to her room, but she hoped everything was okay as she tried to decipher her friend's curious actions.

After placing their order and hanging up the phone, Maura appeared within seconds with cotton pads and nail-polish remover. Jane just smiled gratefully at the sight. How did I get so lucky?

Later that night, after dinner the two sat comfortably on the lounge watching what was already the second episode of CSI for the night. Jane had her legs tucked up on the lounge beside her with her head resting on her hand. Maura had made herself comfortable on her back with her knees up and her head resting happily on Jane's legs. At some point in the evening, in attempts to sit more comfortably, one of Maura's hands had found its way to Jane's upper leg, occasionally rubbing lightly to make sure her companion was still awake.

When Jane initially noticed the presence of Maura's hand she felt a tightness in her stomach. Shock, she supposes. What seemed to surprise her more though was that she was very quickly very okay with it. She actually even liked it a little. To reciprocate some sort of approval, and even a little encouragement, she at one stage leant down to kiss Maura's forehead, following it swiftly with a kind smile. Maura seemed to like that.

As the night progressed, as did Maura's hand. Not necessarily in a sexual way, more so proximity-wise. It had slowly drifted further up Jane's leg and under the edge of her pyjama shorts which had already risen a little when they sat down.

As they sat watching mindless television and having light, intermittent conversation, Maura's thumb comfortably grazed over the skin of Jane's upper thigh. She noticed little ripples in Jane's skin which stopped her thumb rubbing instantly. Jane hadn't really seemed to notice though. She seemed quite content to simply sit and watch T.V.

"Jane," she said softly as she sat up beside her.

"Hm," she hummed glancing down from the television, awaiting Maura's next thought.

Maura sat up was now staring at Jane's leg in somewhat dim light. "Are they... scars?" She asked with a caring tone. She moved her hand back to Jane's leg and rested it just next to what she had felt a moment ago.

Jane stiffened, and Maura knew it. Trying horribly to brush it off though, she forced herself to relax before saying almost convincingly, "Oh yeah, they're nothing." And she meant it… sort of.

Maura wasn't going to push Jane further than she wanted to go, but she felt had to ask. "What are they from?" Her voice was almost shaky. Suspecting she already knew what they might have been caused by, a part of her already felt crushed by the thought.

Jane took a breath and said reasonably, "Ah, it was just teenage stuff." She ended it with a smile, in the hopes of putting Maura at ease. The scars were old and, honestly, she hadn't really thought about them all that much except for some times when she saw them as she changed or something.

Maura was surprised, and a little relieved, that Jane seemed to have come to terms with whatever had happened, but she still hated that she had to go through it. She found her mouth moving before her brain could stop her. "That day, you had a large bandage… Is that what it was from?"

Jane tilted her head slightly, unsure of what exactly Maura was referring to.

"One day," she said in a measured way. "When we were working in my classroom, you had gone to the bin to sharpen a pencil and I saw what looked to be a large bandage that was on the side of your hip and appeared to continue downwards." Maura waited, giving Jane a moment to catch up.

"You saw?" She asked, genuinely surprised. She always thought she covered herself well enough for people not to notice. Maura wasn't people though.

"Yes," she said abashedly. "I wanted to talk to you about it but I didn't want to scare you off if I pushed you too far." She was a little ashamed for not bringing it up then, but she felt like Jane didn't really have a lot of people she felt comfortable talking to and didn't want to lower that number further.

"Yeah," she said steadily, "I probably wouldn't have known what to say then anyway." She showed a skin deep smile before slowly trying to explain. "I guess it was a coping thing… I never wanted to die or anything, just get through the days," she tried to assure Maura.

"I'm sorry," she said solemnly, unable to glance away from the raised little white streaks on Jane's leg for more than a moment.

Jane scoffed a little. "What are you sorry for? You were nothing but nice to me the whole time. If it weren't for you, I probably wouldn't have coped as well as I did."

Maura raised her eye brows a little, not quite sure of what she just heard. "Self-harm was coping well?"

Jane sort of shrugged quite vacantly. "When you put it like that, it doesn't exactly sound good, but yeah. I could have done a lot of stupid things to cope so, in comparison, it maybe wasn't so bad."

Maura just watched, perplexed at this new layer of Jane.

"Maur'," Jane said with a light smile, making sure to get Maura's eye contact. "It's okay. It happened. It wasn't great, but it's over… and I'm not looking back." Jane was a little more adamant about that last part than probably would have been reassuring, but it seemed to do the trick.

"Jane?" Maura said as confidently as she could, despite her prevailing shyness in this situation.

"Yeah?"

"Can I sleep with you tonight?"

Jane's whole body tensed once again.

Maura quickly picked up on what may have been misunderstood and said resolutely, "Not sleep with you," she assured. "Just near you," she said hopefully. "With you."

"Yeah," she said peacefully. "Sure," she smiled.

Hey lovelies,

Sorry about the long chapter but I do hope you enjoyed it.

Would love to hear any thoughts you might have.

Hope you're all happy and well.

CC