My shoes splashed hard through puddles as I ran through the heavy rain, the raindrops hitting my bare arms like needles. I wasn't expecting a storm that day, so I didn't bother to take a jacket out with me. By the time I got back to the apartment I was soaked through, and so were my clothes. But that was all okay – because happy times were waiting for me on the other side. Her smile was waiting for me. I smiled to myself as I put my key in the door… But when I pushed that door open, everything changed. My heart shattered in an instant. My stomach churned with waves of betrayal. She and him… Together… Why?

There is no remorse on those faces. He tries to explain himself with a blatant lie, and she glares at me, wasting no time in making this my fault. But… I can't hear her… Anymore. My heart had been torn from my chest and crushed, but I couldn't feel it. My freezing cold skin and soaked shoes were no longer a part of me. I couldn't feel anything… Anymore.

No… I definitely wasn't expecting a storm that day.

…

I couldn't concentrate at work in the slightest. I was too distracted by thoughts of… That day. But why? I hadn't thought about back then for a long time, like my mind just vetoed it every time I even started to think about it. But all of a sudden, after seeing Aunt Marnie's gift, I couldn't shake it. Even now, though, it was a dull memory. Like every time I started to feel, my mind would shut off. I couldn't see their faces. Couldn't hear their voices. Just a grey blur of the scene lit up by a crack of lightning, thunder roaring behind me.

Usually it'd be a rare blessing for something to distract my mind so much that the work day flies by. But not this. My mind was still trying to fight off the memories – I could barely follow a train of thought. How frustrating. Did I even sleep last night? I don't know… Ever since I caught sight of that stupid box, everything's just been a sea of dull painful memories. A sea of her. What was her name again? What colour were her eyes? Maybe three years of heavy drinking messed with my memory more than I realised, but I could hardly see that as a bad thing if it helped erase those events. Ugh, just the thought of it was making me thirsty. I was sweating beads – it almost felt like the white-washed walls of Joja Mart were closing in. I have to get out of here. I need a drink.

5pm. Finally. I kicked open those bright blue doors and got the hell out. The cool evening air hit me as I walked along the river on my way to the Saloon. I swallowed hard at my reflection in the crystal clear water; my throat was so dry I doubt there'd be much difference if I was in the middle of the desert. Finally, I got to the entrance of the Saloon. I propped up the door with my foot, ready to kick it open, but something stopped me. Something, deep down, felt very wrong. The thought of walking in with everyone looking at me… I just couldn't bring myself to open the door. What the hell is wrong with me? Well, there was nothing for it. I turned and headed for Aunt Marnie's ranch, kicking the pavement as I went.

The cows raised their heads as I returned to the ranch. It was pretty weird seeing them awake – I usually left too early and got back too late. Pushing the door open, I noticed all the lights were off – everyone must have been out. Marnie would've been out at the Saloon flirting with the mayor, and I guess that Jas kid was probably being tutored or something. Either way, it was nice to finally be alone. Shuffling into my room, I sat down on my bed and buried my head in my hands. Foggy memories and a swirling headache haunted me. Through the darkness, I squinted down at the floor – the beer that Aunt Marnie bought me was still there. I reached for the box, and hoisted it up onto my lap. Ever since I looked at this stupid box, fragmented memories have tormented me. But what if I drank it? Would it all come back? This stuff started this mess… Maybe it could end it, too. I ripped off the top of the box messily, taking a can from inside. I pulled the tab with a hiss… Just the smell of the beer vapour in the air made my stomach turn nostalgically. I raised the can to my lips. Time to conquer this.

As the beer washed over my tongue with a tingling sensation, it took my breath away. Like I was walking a fine line between enlightenment, and losing myself completely. The taste took me all the way back. Three years of buried memories rushed past the twisting, drunken kaleidoscope of my mind as if a veil had been lifted. Her name. What she said to me. How many times, with whom. It was all flooding back… And it was giving me one hell of a headache.

It had gotten late. I… Wasn't feeling so good. Everything was swirling and pulsing and, now that I focused in on the real world again, I'd apparently taken a walk into the forest, and I was standing on the pier at the lake. I took the beer with me, of course, but I'd drank so much that only a few cans remained now. I had no will to do anything but stare out into the lake as my mind spiralled into dull sensations of hopelessness. I remember everything.

Who knows how much time had passed, or what time it even was. My mind didn't even bother to register the footsteps approaching behind me, but I snapped back to reality when I heard a familiar voice.

"…Shane?"

Mira's P.O.V.

It'd been a pretty long day for me that I decided to wrap up with a trip to the Saloon. Once inside, though, I noticed it was a little emptier than usual. Lewis and Marnie were sitting next to the door, Clint watched Emily fondly as she worked next to Gus behind the bar, Leah was carving funky shapes into a piece of wood with her pen knife at the edge of the room… But that wasn't everyone. It was 8:30pm already, and Shane was missing. It's not like he had anywhere else to be, right? "Hey, Emily!" I waved, approaching the bar. "Did Shane head home early?"

"He never came in tonight. Maybe he's sick," Emily chuckled in response. Yeah… I guess Shane would have to be sick not to be in the Saloon. It was pretty out of character. I started to feel a little uneasy about the whole situation. Faking a stretch, I stood back up from the bar stool. "Ahh… Well, I've had a pretty long day, so on second thought I might just hit the hay. See you later, Emily!"

After leaving the Saloon, I ran as fast as I could to Marnie's ranch. Something didn't feel right, and if I could just confirm that Shane was home, then I could put my mind at rest. No problem. At the entrance of the farm, I tiptoed past the sleeping cows and skulked along the walls of the house until I reached a window. I was pretty sure that what I was doing was highly socially deplorable if not illegal, so to avoid embarrassment and a restraining order I didn't want to be seen. Luckily, Marnie lived right on the edge of the forest and I already knew she wasn't home, so I didn't really have much to worry about. Peeking through the window, I noticed that most of the lights were out – except for one, where I always saw little Jas playing whenever I visited Marnie. Other than that, the house was pitch black… Maybe Shane was asleep? I guess with his schedule he probably didn't get much sleep… I nodded to myself, deciding that must be the case, and started to head home.

I'd been staking out Marnie's house for longer than I thought – it was 11pm by the time I got close to the entrance of my farm. I heard a tinny sound behind me from out of the darkness, like a can being kicked over. It sounded like it was coming from the lake. I stared through the eerie night-time forest; Mayor Lewis warned me never to venture into the forest at night, but I was curious… And it's not like the lake was very far in. It was practically on the edge of town. Convincing myself of this, I edged toward the mysterious luminance of the lake. My eyes widened as a familiar figure came into view, hunched over at the end of the pier. "…Shane?" I approached him through the darkness as he turned to face me slightly, his lifeless eyes still fixated on the water. "Up late, huh?" he mumbled, as I crouched down next to him.

"Yeah, but… What about you? Why are you out here at this time?"

"No particular reason…" He slurred his words heavily, and looked a complete mess. Shane was in a pretty bad way… It's a good job I came along. He could've fallen in the lake and no one would have known. "Here, have a cold one." He grabbed a can of beer out of a box that was next to him, on the opposite side of him than me. He had his own half-empty can in his other hand. Taking the still cold can from him, I sat all the way down. I had a feeling we'd be there a while. "So… What were you thinking about all the way out here?"

"Life."

"How long have you been sat here?"

"Dunno." He took another chug of beer. He stunk of it. I had to wonder how many he'd already had… I was about to ask, but I caught sight of his expression. Almost like emptiness, but more than that… As if he'd had everything that mattered to him stripped from him. A pain that only the truly lost could ever hope to understand shone in his bloodshot, half-open eyes. My heart sank. Shane has been suffering, and no one could see past his rugged exterior enough to reach out to him. Never before have I seen such raw pain yet such emptiness on someone's face at the same time… As if he's largely given up, yet a spark of hope wants him to keep trying. Keep hurting. Hope for a brighter tomorrow. I felt a twinge of empathy as these familiar thoughts churned through me. I don't know his story, but… I certainly know how it feels to keep wading through a world that has already set you up to fall.

We sat in silence for a long time. I kept trying to find the right words to say, but in the end, there really was nothing 'right' to say. I knew he'd probably push me away, but I wanted to show him I cared. As my hand approached his shoulder to comfort him, he suddenly spoke. "Do you ever feel like…" I drew my hand back quickly. He rubbed his temples as he tried to formulate a sentence. "…No matter what you do, you're gonna fail? Like you're stuck in some… Miserable abyss and you're so deep you can't even see the light of day?" He was very drunk, but he sounded so… Sincere. I was speechless. I knew exactly how he was feeling, and yet… Words escaped me. Shane took another sip of his drink, and swallowed audibly. "I just feel like… No matter how hard I try, I'm not strong enough to climb out of that hole." I could hear the bitter pain in his voice. Yes… The abyss. The dark hole that seems impossible to scale out of. My chest ached as I processed his words. I finally summed up the courage to place a reassuring hand on his shoulder. He didn't shrug me off like I thought he would – he just sat there, like a sad statue, until it was time for him to take another sip of beer. I looked down at my own drink, and knocked it back in one chug. Probably not the best idea since I hadn't eaten much that day, but old habits die hard. Shane turned to me, a small smirk forming on his face. "Heh... Fast drinker, huh?" His voice softened, the shimmering moonlit lake reflecting off of his deep brown eyes. "Woman after my own heart."

My face flushed red after hearing his words, and my stomach tied itself in a knot. I suddenly found myself staring down at the surface of the lake, my breathing thin. Was it the alcohol? Or was it…?

"Don't make it a habit, though…" his tired voice became serious. "You've still got a future ahead of you… Unlike some people." Shane sighed, and my heart ached. Suddenly, he staggered to his feet. "Welp, my liver's begging me to stop, so guess it's time to call it a night…" He stumbled around, holding his stomach, and almost fell straight into the lake.

"Be careful!" I sprung to my feet and grabbed his arm as he tottered on the edge of the pier. A blush spread across my face again, but I needed to get him home safely. "Let me walk you home, at least... It's dark."

I dragged the drunken Shane by the arm until we reached Marnie's ranch, steering him clear of every rock and tree along the way. By the time we got there, I was sweating – he towered over me in height, and he wasn't exactly light either. Puffing for air, I said, "Okay, we're here. Will you be okay getting into bed by yourself or should I come with you?" I immediately clammed up after saying that – I lost the ability to stop myself from saying suggestive things when I'd been drinking. "Er… N-nevermind. You're probably fine."

"…See you around, Rain." Shane mumbled as he stumbled into Marnie's house, apparently walking into every wall on the way to his room from the bumps I could hear from outside.

I walked back to my farm through the south entrance, a little saddened. All this time I thought Shane was just kind of a grumpy jerk… Little did I know he was suffering. Little did anyone know, or even seem to care. At first I wanted to make friends with him so that he'd swallow his pride, to prove a point, I guess. But from then onwards, I knew that he was building walls around himself. That he was afraid. I clenched my fists in determination. "Shane… You're not alone."

Author's Note: So! I'm finally back to writing after wrestling with the flu for two weeks. Glad that's over, and sorry for the lack of updates in the meantime. My deadlines are also only a couple weeks away so updates won't be super frequent, but I'll do my best. I wanted to centre this chapter around Shane's iconic cutscene in the game, since I think that's super important for the character. I was a little scared I wouldn't do it justice, but I guess you guys will just have to let me know how I did. :P

So, the news has been dropped that Shane will be a marriage candidate in an upcoming update! Such excite! We can finally warm his cold heart :D

Thanks so much to everyone who has been supporting this story. Your reviews mean so much to me, and made me super pumped to write more of this. Ever since this site accepted my request for the Stardew Valley category, I've been so excited to write this fic, so I'm over the moon to see that it's been so well received. Thank you guys so much!

Okay, sorry, I'll stop gushing now. Bye! ~Nyannygiri