The third visit happened on the same day as the second. Natsu had been to the shop in the morning and, after a fair amount of what he considered humiliation, he was completely prepared to just hole himself up in his room and binge watch a new anime. He was. You should have. Instead you're here to embarrass yourself again.

Instead he was right outside the shop, clenching his fists, steeling himself to move his feet and just go inside already and make it clear that the vibrator was a present and that he would not be… having a nice time with any product whatsoever. He didn't know why getting that point across clearly was so important. Maybe he just didn't want Gray to think he was a pervert. Except he works in a sex shop and you're being ridiculous and just turn around and go home. Why are you here?

But he wasn't turning around. He was biting his lip and making his way inside. He walked straight down the wide center aisle toward Gray with shut eyes and just hope you don't knock over another shelf, god you look stupid for sure.

He opened his eyes when he reached the center of the aisle to make sure Gray was actually there because if he started shouting that he wasn't going to use a sex toy while he was in the middle of a sex shop the disbelieving snort he would get from Jellal would burn his face off.

Gray was there. He looked decidedly pissed off and there was a guy in front of the counter, all spiked reddish brown hair and slanted light brown eyes that Natsu could see in the mirror behind Gray that made him look naturally dangerous like poison, who was asking Gray out very loudly. Jellal didn't seem to be around and neither was anyone else. Apparently Natsu had stalled for far too long, debating with himself whether or not this was a good idea and whether or not he would do it anyway when he decided that it definitely wasn't. It was most likely near closing time. You waited too long and now it's going to look creepy that you're here.

Natsu watched the interaction unfold and saw Gray's expression tightening in frustration with every second that the guy wouldn't leave.

In retrospect, there were many normal things Natsu could have done. He could have gone up to the guy and told him 'no means no,' or any other heroic cliche. He could have pretended to be a new hire and kicked the guy out making himself look a little better in Gray's eyes. What Natsu did was not normal because you can never do anything right, can you?

Natsu grabbed the closest thing on the shelf beside him, which looked like a bowling pin and he didn't stop to wonder what the hell a bowling pin would be doing in a sex shop, and threw it at the back of the guy's head.

All three of them froze. The man's shoulders were tense and slowly he was turning around and you are so fucked. You're going to die because you never think before you act.

The man's fists clenched and he took one step forward before Gray seemed to snap out of an onslaught of shock and said loudly, "No violence or I will ban you."

The guy's head snapped back around to level Gray with an angry glare and Natsu supposed he must have been a regular customer because he stormed out and shoved against Natsu's shoulder on his way out. Natsu breathed a small sigh of relief. You're alive, you poked the dragon and you are alive, you are amazing-

"You break it you buy it." What?

"Huh?" Natsu asked. My god, you are just trying to look like the world's biggest idiot, aren't you?

Gray was pointing down at something on the floor and Natsu's gaze fell onto the supposed bowling pin on the floor when he realized there was a lid on the bottom that had snapped off and the bowling pin was a… a…. His face flamed brightly at the sight of the artificial vagina that was just laying there and he pointedly shut his eyes because that was not attractive and people who put their thing in there are insane.

He grimaced, walked over to it, picked it up by the end that was solid and not mushy and gross-looking, and placed it on the counter. He sighed irritably and Gray's small chuckle breathed life back into his chest and fuck, you're being so weird and cheesy, just stop it.

Gray was biting his lip as he tried not to laugh. This man was pink and adorable and obviously didn't come here to buy artificial genitals and he figured he should make conversation with the guy who threw a sex toy at the back of someone's head for him.

"So what brought you back? Twice in a day. Are you going to be a regular?" Gray asked, smirk in place. Locked and loaded and fucking sexy. Then the words registered in Natsu's head.

"What? No!" He shouted, face on fire. Nothing he'd bought was even for himself!

Gray pouted. Honest to god pouted and you need to leave before you get in any deeper. Leave now. Just do it.

Then the pout became a small lecherous grin and he said, "No? Did our vibrator selection not satisfy your needs?"

Natsu choked on air and Gray leaned forward saying, "Because here, we're all about customer satisfaction."

Natsu opened his mouth to form some kind of reply and what came out was a strangled high-pitched sound that started at the back of his throat. He cleared his throat frustratedly and ignored the insinuation because Gray was teasing him and Natsu wasn't experienced in that game and he would lose. Epically. He chose to address that first question saying, "Nothing brought me back, it was… stupid."

Before Gray could reply Natsu muttered out, "I'm never going to use this thing anyway," under his breath, thinking Gray wouldn't here him. He vastly underestimated the level of silence there was in an empty store near closing time. Gray heard it and he smirked deviously.

"But you are going to use the vibrator?" he asked, tone innocent with the slightest hint of amusement that he tried to mask.

The pink in Natsu's face deepened and he hurried to shout, "No! That was a present! A present!"

Gray leaned back, crossing his arms, making a small 'hmm' noise before saying, "Right. Sure."

Natsu persisted. "It was!"

"I believe you," Gray said, in a tone that implied he most certainly did not believe him.

Natsu shot his hand out to pick up the nondescript black plastic bag that concealed the purchase he would never use and rushed to the exit before the blush on his face spread anywhere else, trying not to think about how he felt more flustered than when he'd come in.