Note: chapter title from "come home" by one republic + sara bareilles.

5. there's someone I've been missing

… … …

Saturday mornings after a game might be his least favorite, Damon thinks. He usually wakes up feeling every bit of whatever hits he took the night before. There's always a few bruises scattered across his torso, and thanks to his injury from last season, he'll probably wake up with a swollen wrist every Saturday, too. It's nothing he can't handle - he's had worse. But the stiffness and soreness in his muscles reminds him that he should probably get up and move his body, which is the last thing he wants to do.

He got lucky this morning - Dad had some business to attend to at the car dealership he runs in town, so Damon didn't have to worry about being awoken at the crack of dawn to go for a run. He's gonna go for a run anyway, but at least this way he can do it on his own time, at his own pace. He doesn't mind running, to be honest. It's always been a good way for him to keep himself in shape, which keeps his father happy, while simultaneously giving him time to think, to clear his head. He does his best healing this way.

This whole new dynamic with Stefan is opening up old wounds that he really doesn't care to relive. When Damon joined the football team in middle school, Giuseppe's favoritism toward him became all the more pronounced, and though it made him uncomfortable at times, what son doesn't want his father's approval? Stefan, however, took Damon's acquiescence as a betrayal, and pushed him away in retaliation. So while Damon gained a father, he lost a brother, and things have never been the same between them.

Which leads him to Elena. He needs to make things right with her. Not only because he needs her to help him keep his grades up - though that is certainly a motivating factor - but because he really does feel guilty. Yes, about the way he treated her last week, but also about the way he's treated her in the last few years. When Stefan pushed him away, he took Elena with him, and Damon was hurt, so he took it out on both of them. It took him a long time to accept that she didn't know what he was going through - neither of them did. He was angry with Stefan, because Stefan should have known, but he didn't necessarily have to take it out on her. She was a really good friend to him - maybe the best friend he's ever had, aside from Stefan - and she didn't deserve the way he treated her. And he really fucking hates feeling guilty.

He doesn't know where to start, though. How do you apologize for four years' worth of anger-induced torment?

He jogs past her house - not on purpose, he swears - and contemplates knocking on the door. He thinks maybe if he sees her face, if he can gauge how she's feeling, maybe he would be able to decide the best way to approach her. But Stefan's dorky little red car is in the driveway, and he knows part of their deal was that Stefan wouldn't know about this. He's pretty sure Stefan doesn't even know he and Elena have been talking; showing up at her door unannounced might be a bit of a giveaway.

So he jogs home, decides maybe a simple text is a good place to start.

Sorry I was an ass. It's what I do. Are we cool?

He doesn't expect a response right away. She is with Stefan, after all. But his phone pings just a few moments later, and her retort makes him grin.

You were an ass, I was a bitch. We're even.

He doesn't know that he'd go that far - he probably deserved at least 85% of what she dished out - but if she's gonna let him off the hook, he'd be stupid not to take it.

… … …

She can't decide which is more ironic: the fact that Stefan tells her that Damon offered to help him with football when that's the last thing Stefan really wants, or the fact that Damon's name appears on her phone screen just as Stefan is telling the story.

"Why would he want to help you?" Elena asks, trying to keep him distracted while she responds to Damon's text. His blunt apology makes her want to smile, but she doesn't want to give Stefan anything to ask questions about, so she quickly types out her response and locks her phone.

Stefan snorts. "He said he needs help holding up the 'great Salvatore name.' As if Dad hasn't made it clear to me at every turn that I'm not even worthy of the name."

Elena shrugs, takes a bite of her eggs. "Maybe he really is just trying to help you."

"Yeah, maybe," Stefan mutters. "I don't know why he would, though. Things have been so tense between us lately."

"I hear too much talking," Alaric interjects from the stove. "What's wrong with your breakfast? Did I make your eggs too spongy again, Stefan? You always were a whiny little bitch about your eggs."

Elena laughs at the scowl on Stefan's face as he aggressively collects a spoonful of his scrambled eggs to eat. Saturday morning breakfast at the Gilbert house is quite an affair, thanks to Ric. He showcased his breakfast cooking skills not long after he moved in three years ago, and once Stefan got wind of the feast, he almost immediately became a fixture at the Saturday breakfast table. It's been tradition ever since.

"Do you ever wonder if your dad treats Damon the same way he treats you?" Elena questions, tossing a grape into her mouth.

Stefan blinks at her. "Why would you even ask me that? Of course not," he insists. "Damon is the golden child. He can do no wrong in Dad's eyes. I'm the disappointment."

"I'm just saying," she shrugs. "That kind of behavior isn't usually an isolated incident. Maybe the way he torments Damon is just different from the way he torments you."

"I'll believe it when I see it," Stefan says finally, sawing off a piece of pancake and shoving it in his mouth. "But I won't hold my breath."

Elena's phone rings, and Stefan furrows his brow. "Why is Caroline calling you?"

"Probably some stupid cheerleading stuff," Elena sighs, rolling her eyes. "Hello?"

"Are you busy today?" Caroline asks, skipping the pleasantries as if her phone call isn't completely out of the ordinary.

"Uh," Elena hedges. "I'm just finishing up breakfast-"

"Not now." Elena can practically hear Caroline rolling her eyes. "Later. Bonnie and I are going to the Grill to hang out and we wanted to see if you want to come."

Elena widens her eyes at Stefan, and he furrows his brow at her. "Um… yeah, I'm not busy. That sounds good."

"Great!" Caroline chirps. "I'll text you with the details."

Elena hangs up and looks over at Stefan, who's watching her expectantly. "What the hell was that?"

"Apparently I'm hanging out with Caroline and Bonnie this afternoon."

"Random," he comments. "Any particular reason why?"

Elena shrugs, biting into a strawberry. "She just said they're going to the Grill later and they wanted to see if I would come. Sounds pretty harmless."

"Anything involving Caroline Forbes can't be harmless," Stefan laughs. "What do you think she's up to?"

"Who knows. But whatever it is, I won't let them drag me into it," she insists.

"Yeah, well, good luck." Stefan stands from the table and disposes of his dishes in the sink. "I've gotta go figure out how this thing with Damon is gonna work."

"You know," Alaric begins once Stefan's left the room. "It's probably about time you start hanging out with some new friends. I'm getting a little sick of that one."

"I heard that!"

… … …

The Mystic Grill is pretty much the center of social life in Mystic Falls. Business meetings, family outings, the occasional drunken night out - not to mention the high school students who frequently hang out at numerous tables ordering nothing but fries and soft drinks. If it's happening in Mystic Falls, the odds are it's happening here. Elena has so many memories of growing up here - birthday parties, late night meals when Jenna burned whatever she was trying to make for dinner, her first day of school tradition with Stefan. She can safely say she's never been interrogated here, though. Until now.

"I don't know what you want me to tell you," Elena laughs, picking another fry from the double order the three of them are splitting.

"Oh, please. You look so innocent, but I know the truth," Caroline narrows her eyes playfully. "You're the reason he's resisting me."

Elena visibly winces. "Please don't ever imply anything like that ever again. We grew up together. He's literally like my brother." She remembers when she and Stefan were younger and their mothers used to joke about them growing up and getting married someday. She shudders at the thought.

"You're telling me you made it through puberty without ever looking twice at Stefan?"

Elena rolls her eyes. "Not all of us are completely controlled by our hormones, Caroline," she reminds her.

"Well," she scoffs. "You're missing out on all the fun." She smirks and sips her diet soda. "At least tell me you've noticed Damon."

What? Elena practically spits out her drink. "Damon? What about Damon?"

"I knew it!" Caroline laughs. "You so had a crush on him."

"Leave her alone, Care," Bonnie chuckles. "We didn't invite her here so you could interrogate her about the Salvatore brothers."

"What are you talking about? That's exactly why I invited her."

Elena sighs. "Look, yes, Damon and I have history. That's not a secret. But we haven't even been friends in a really long time."

"Not the point," Caroline sing-songs. "You totally had eyes for him back in middle school, didn't you?"

She can feel her cheeks turning red and wills them to stop. "Stefan would've killed me."

"Ha!" Caroline sits back, crosses her arms over her chest, smirks smugly. "So you're not immune to the Salvatore charm and good looks. Noted."

Elena wants to bang her head against the table. If there's one thing she doesn't ever want to relive, it's the embarrassing crush she had on Damon in the seventh grade. She never told Stefan, because he would have thrown a fit. She remembers confiding in Jenna and feeling so silly and stupid about it. When things started to go south between the three of them, she tried to stay neutral; the war between the brothers was brewing and she didn't want any part of it. The more Stefan told her about the way Damon was acting, the way his father was treating him… she didn't want to believe it. Until that day freshman year when he mocked her in the hallway in front of everyone. She's just a pathetic little orphan girl. There was no teasing lilt to his voice, no playfulness in his eyes… just malice and anger. She skipped third period that day to cry in the bathroom and nurse her broken heart.

So, no thanks, she would rather not relive that time in her life.

"Good to know you've never had a thing for Stefan, though," Caroline continues.

"You're insufferable," Elena comments, chewing on another fry.

Caroline hums as she sips her drink. "I just know what I want."

"And what you want is Matt. Your boyfriend. Right?" Bonnie interjects.

"Of course," Caroline comments with an eye roll. "God, lighten up, you two."

She throws a fry at Elena, who gasps and throws one back. As the three of them sit there laughing and joking, she wonders if maybe Alaric is right. Maybe it's time for her to branch out a little bit, to make some new friends. She never would have pictured herself here, with Bonnie and Caroline, but she thinks maybe this is a good place to start.

… … …

"I don't even know why we're bothering with this," Stefan says as he and Damon make their way out to the football field. He can think of a thousand and one other things he'd rather be doing on a Sunday afternoon, including scrubbing his bathroom with a toothbrush. "We both know it's not going to make any difference."

"Relax," Damon smirks. "We just need you to be good enough to get on the field during a game so Dad will chill out. You don't need to suddenly turn into Jerry Rice."

"Who?"

Damon rolls his eyes. "Nevermind. The point is that you're not as far away from where you need to be as you think. You just need a few pointers." He throws his bag on the ground, tosses the football up and catches it again. He points the football down the field and nods at Stefan. "Go stand on the fifteen yard line."

Stefan does as he's told and turns to his brother expectantly. He's blindsided when Damon throws a perfect spiral his way and instead of catching it, he puts his hands up and ends up knocking it to the ground. "What the hell, man? I wasn't ready."

"That's the point," Damon says. "In a game, you have to catch the ball on the run. You don't get to just stand still and wait for the QB to throw it to you, unless you want to get flattened by a linebacker."

Stefan scowls and throws the ball back to Damon. "Just let me get warmed up, okay?"

Damon throws another perfect spiral, but with less velocity, and Stefan puts his hands up the way he was taught to catch it. "Oh, good. At least you know proper technique." He smirks. "So, what's Elena up to today? What does she do when you two aren't attached at the hip?"

"Jeremy's son was born yesterday," Stefan tells him. "They're all at the hospital today."

"Damn, Jeremy," Damon comments. "Didn't he just graduate high school, like, yesterday?"

Stefan ignores him, throws the ball back. "Why did you offer to help me?"

Damon furrows his brow, taken aback by the abrupt subject change. "I told you. I'm bound to screw up eventually, and if you're performing better, maybe Dad won't be so pissed off about it."

"That's bullshit." Stefan points the football at his brother before he tosses it back again. "Like Dad would ever be upset with anything you did."

Damon rolls his eyes, cradles the ball so it doesn't hit him in the stomach. "I know you don't believe me, smartass, but I have some experience with Dad's nagging. Maybe even more than you do."

Stefan scoffs. "Yeah, right. You've always been Dad's favorite. What could you possibly know about the way he treats me?"

Damon holds the ball, catches his brother's eyes. "More than you think."

Stefan just looks at him for a second, then puts his hands up to catch the ball again. "Whatever you've gone through with him doesn't hold a candle to what I've gone through, so don't even try. The last five years have been a living hell."

Damon rolls his eyes, and Stefan fights the urge to throw the football at his face. The fact that his brother is even trying to argue with him about this is absurd. It's no secret to anyone who knows anything about their family that Damon is the better Salvatore, and their father makes sure it stays that way. He's annoyed that Damon's trying to tell him he doesn't know what he's talking about.

"Get over yourself, man," Damon says finally. "It's not always all about you."

"It's never about me," Stefan corrects him, throwing the football as hard as he can and forcing Damon to back up to catch it. "That's the problem."

… … …

On Monday after practice, Damon heads for the tutoring center. He hasn't spoken to Elena since their brief text exchange on Saturday morning, but he's hoping she'll be here for their scheduled session. He's already feeling like he's behind in a few of his classes, and he could really use her help to get him up to speed.

He's relieved when he pushes open the door and finds her sitting at a table, her earbuds in as she concentrates on whatever assignment she's working on. She must have showered after cheerleading today, because her hair is tied up in a bun and she's wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt instead. He watches her for a moment, notices the way she bites her lip when she's trying to copy something, the adorable way her brow furrows when she's thinking. She's beautiful. He's always known it; it hit him like a freight train when he was twelve, how beautiful she really was. He didn't think those feelings were still there, but here they are, bubbling to the surface.

He clears his throat to shove them back down and gets her attention. She pulls her earbuds out, gives him a little smile. "Hey."

"Hey back." He approaches her slowly. "I wasn't sure if you'd be here."

She furrows her brow, reaches for her planner. "We have a session scheduled, don't we?"

"Yeah, we do," he confirms. "I just… wasn't sure where we stood. After last week."

She lets her lips quirk up at the corner a little bit. "I told you we were cool."

"I know, but…" he sighs. "Listen. I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry."

"You already said-"

"I said sorry for being an ass. What I really meant was that I'm sorry for everything." He runs his hand through his hair, lets his backpack drop to the ground as he takes the seat across from her. "I was mad at Stefan for a long time, after things went bad, and I took it out on you. You didn't deserve that."

She tilts her head to the side. "No, you're right. I didn't."

"You were a really good friend to me, and I know that bridge is burned, but I'm hoping maybe we can call a truce," he says with a smirk. "For the sake of my grades and my football career."

Elena sighs, smiles a little. "I guess that sounds good." Damon extends his hand for her to shake, his blue eyes sparkling with amusement, and she giggles. "And bridges can be rebuilt, Damon. It doesn't have to be burned forever."

Her eyes bore into his, and he feels like he's twelve again, trying to fight back the strange urge to kiss her. He's always had a little bit of trouble resisting impulse when it comes to her, but even he knows where to draw the line. They just got back on somewhat stable footing; he doesn't want to rock the boat just yet. He has a feeling, though, that the longer he's around her, the more time he spends with her, it's gonna get more and more difficult to remember where that line is. He wonders if she'd let him cross it, when the time comes. Either way, he's gonna have a lot of fun finding out.

… … …