Chapter 20

Monday 8thSeptember 2014

When my fingers finally lost their grip and I began to fall back as gravity took hold, I fully expected to freefall until finally coming crashing to the ground. It's what should have happened, and what would have if it weren't for the large hand that came from above to grab hold of my arm.

I shriek as it happens, my whole body in panic mode as I look up into the intense green eyes of my savior.

Luca.

The muscles in his arms strain as he carefully pulls me up onto the metal platform he's positioned himself on. I collapse on the cold surface, hearing cheers from down below us. Peeking over the edge through the safety railing, I see everyone standing there staring up at us, their faces a mixture of astonishment and horror at what might have happened.

I don't see Cloud or Mai in the few seconds I look for them, but it's probably just as well; their reactions would be too much for my fragile state right now.

"Were you trying to get yourself killed?" Luca snaps, effectively bringing my attention back to him. His eyes are snapping in fury, no doubt planning on throwing me off the platform himself. "I swear, if you were a wolf already and part of the pack…" he trails off, seeming to get a grip on himself.

Now my own anger is back, and it feels good for the fire spreading through my veins to cancel out the cold chill of fear. "What does it matter to you?" I demand, fed up with his arrogance and self-importance. "You've barely spoken two words to me in as many weeks. Why should I give you any kind of explanation?"

His expression softens a little, anger turning to irritation. Less like a lion about to maul me, and more like a kitten who's feathered toy just got taken away.

Whatever I was expecting him to do, it was not for him to lean forward and kiss me softly. His mouth is warm on mine, enticing me with the possibility of so much more.

I freeze, my brain refusing to function properly. Stop this right now! I yell at myself, willing my arms to lift from my sides to push him away.

But they don't.

Luca is the first to pull back, his eyes wide as we stare at each other. "Why you?" he murmurs, eyes searching my face. I don't know what he's looking for there, but all I feel is disgust at myself for the way I reacted.

I stand abruptly, clinging to the rail in case my legs decided to give out and send me plummeting back to Earth. No reason to give Luca another chance to save me.

Refusing to say another word to him, I begin making my way to the other end of the platform, where a flying fox leads to the next section and a step closer to getting the hell away from Luca and all the feelings he stirs in me.

Grabbing hold of the hard-plastic handle thing, I push off from the platform, feeling an exhilarating rush as I fly through the air, only for it to end moments later as I reach the other end.

Mrs. Northman is fuming by the time my feet are on solid ground again. She has that calm look to her that makes it seem like you'll get away with being an idiot, but as soon as she opens her mouth I know I'm in trouble.

"What the hell do you think you were doing, pulling a stunt like that?" she demands, sounding very much like Luca had, minus the veiled threat. She cuts me off before I can say anything. "I don't care, actually. Luca, take her into the lobby and wait there until class is finished," she adds, directing her words toward Luca, who had just reappeared.

I'm mildly embarrassed by the whole class staring at me, some of them – the ones gossiping about me earlier – were laughing not-so-subtly behind their hands. Cloud and Mai are staring at me, matching looks of concern on their faces. The sight of my boyfriend makes guilt flood through me.

I'd kissed his brother – again – and didn't even know how to feel about it. Apart from guilty, of course.

Not having a chance to talk to them in front of everyone, I submit myself to following Luca out of the room.

Slouching onto the closest bench, I make myself comfortable for the next half hour of self-pity. Completely ignoring Luca, who's sat himself down on a bench opposite from me across the room, I stare at the floor between my shoes.

How do I manage to mess things up so royally? Aside from my impending transition into a furry monster, life has been pretty much perfect for the last few weeks. I had no idea that moving to Serenity Falls would result in actual friends, let alone a boyfriend and someplace I might finally belong.

And I just put both of those things on the line, thanks to letting my anger get out of control. Back in Cali I was different. Cool-headed under pressure, not prone to arguments or confrontation, more of a 'lover not a fighter' type of person than someone who has to prove herself to a bunch of gossips.

I don't even want to go down that particular path right now: I'll only get myself worked up again. My thoughts drift to Cloud again, instead.

Do I tell him what happened with Luca? I didn't ask for it to happen, and sure I didn't exactly stop him… but I was clearly in shock from my near-death experience (resulting from my emotions getting the best of me), and he shouldn't have taken advantage of that by catching me further off guard by kissing me!

No. I won't say anything to Cloud, because it's never going to happen again. Luca is at fault here, not me, and I won't make the situation into more than it actually was. Telling Cloud would be a mistake, especially with our relationship so new.

(Add words after this to NaNoWriMo word count)

"Why'd you do it?"

I look up from the hole I was burning in the floor with my glare to see Luca watching me. He looks unnaturally serious, no sign of the flirtatious smirk or easy-going grin I'd become accustomed to. He still sent butterflies through my stomach, though, and that's enough for me to be pissed at him.

"I should be asking you that," I hiss at him, not believing my own ears. Is he serious right now? He kisses me like that, after weeks of ignoring me, and now chooses to reprimand me for being a little reckless?

He blinks a couple of times, ridiculously long lashes brushing his cheeks each time, distracting me slightly. Why do guys always have such long eyelashes when girls are forced to spend a heap of money to achieve the same look? It's just not fair.

"I wasn't thinking," he finally mutters, and it's his turn to stare daggers at the floor.

I snort. "Neither was I," I say, and we go back to ignoring each other.

It stays like that for the rest of the wait, but right then I couldn't care less. I should have been ashamed at my actions, berating myself for my loss of control, but something in my brain isn't getting the memo.

More than anything, I'm angry.

Angry at Luca for kissing me like it's nothing. Angry at Mom for sending me to this backwards school, after moving us to the strangest town in America, of course. Angry at Dad for dying and making Mom move us away in the first place.

"Miss Oaken."

Mrs. Northman's voice snaps me from my inner turmoil, and I look up slowly. She's got the classic disapproving adult stance: arms crossed, straight back, raised eyebrows, pursed lips.

Behind her is the rest of the class, all pretending to be making their way to the outside doors, while surreptitiously listening in on the verbal beat down I'm about to get. I see no sign of Cloud or Mai, but I try not to look too closely. It's already bad enough that I've embarrassed myself like this.

I stand up from my slumped position, trying to seem somewhat respectful and hopefully get myself out of having to polish silver or some other medieval chore.

Thankfully, Mrs. Northman appears very aware of the lingering audience, and turns to them with her disapproving glare. "Don't you all have somewhere else to be?" she demands, her commanding tone leaving no room for argument.

They scurry out quickly enough after that, leaving me alone with Mrs. Northman, Luca and Elle. The sudden silence is deafening, and completely awkward.

"Luca and Elle, I'll see you in an hour for the next class," Mrs. Northman says to the two older students, her eyes never leaving mine.

They hesitate for a moment, and I wonder if they want to stay to keep me from bodily harm at the hands of our teacher, or to witness my further chastising. Finally, the automatic doors close behind them, and I see Luca turn to glance at me for a moment before disappearing out of sight. Ignoring the flash of emotion I saw in his eyes, I focus on the task at hand; begging for my freedom.

I look back at Mrs. Northman, mouth opening to begin my apologies, but stop short as I take in her sudden change in attitude.

Her arms are no longer crossed, and while her posture is still straight and professional, her shoulders are relaxed as she watches me with an understanding expression. "Why don't we talk in my office?" she suggests, motioning to one of the closed door behind me.

I'm stunned by the total three-sixty, and follow her into the office in silence.

"Take a seat." I'm pointed to a chair in front of her desk, and an image flashes through my mind of all the terrified students who have no doubt been seated there in the past. And here I was thinking that my seventh grade English teacher had been a nightmare; Mrs. Northman, in the little time I've spent in her fabulous company, makes him look like a little boy who stepped on a Lego piece.

"Look," I start, before she even gets a chance to circle the desk and sit in her own chair. "I know what I did was stupid, I really do. I wasn't thinking at all, and I cannot believe I acted so recklessly." I suck in a deep breath to stop the word vomit, willing my nerves to settle the hell down.

She stares at me wordlessly, leaning back in her chair, arms laid along the rests. It's silent for long enough for me to squirm underneath her heavy gaze.

"You know, I've been teaching her for about seven years now," she says finally, shifting her gaze to somewhere over my shoulder. "I've seen plenty of girls and boys come through these doors, some of them for each of the five years, others… for a much shorter period."

What on Earth is she getting at? This is lightyears from the lecture I was expecting, and her choice of an opening topic has completely thrown me.

"What do you mean?" I ask, slightly impatient. If I'm going to be punished, I'd rather she just got it over with as quickly and painlessly as possible.

Her eyes fix on me once again, but something in their depths has shifted, and I don't like what I see. "You probably don't know this – not many students do – but I wasn't born with the abilities or capabilities of most of your classmates. I come from the same origins and all, but I'm included in the gene pool of those lucky enough to escape the full responsibilities of someone such as yourself.

"Sure, I'm stronger and faster than most humans, which can be as much a curse as it is a blessing. It ties me to this world, and as much as I try not to let it bother me, I can never be just a normal woman."

I don't know what to say to any of it. It seems like she's confessing her deepest regrets, but with no indication of what it has to do with me. "So, there are kids born into this… life, who don't end up turning all hairy and bloodthirsty?" I ask, jumping on the one part of her speech that I understood.

A hint of a smile edges her lips, but her expression turns pitiful. My heart, elated with a sliver of hope a moment ago, swiftly deflates.

"Unfortunately, you're one of the few who it is almost guaranteed that the Change will happen to."

Her words hurt, but not as much as the pity lingering in her eyes. "What does this have to do with what happened today?" Irritation is building inside me, and that place behind my breastbone aches, thirsting for the fuel to ignite the fire there.

Mrs. Northman leans forward in her seat to rest her elbows on the desk. "As I said, I've seen cases of every kind come through this gym. Some have been accepting of the life that has been chosen for them, and strive to learn as much as they can in order to control the more primal sides of themselves."

I raise an eyebrow at her. "And the rest?"

She sits back in her chair again. "Anger motivates them, guiding their thoughts and actions. It dictates the kinds of friends they make and the decisions they make. For a little while it keeps them afloat, but eventually the rage consumes them. It burns them up on the inside, until nothing of their former self is left. Sometimes they realize their behavior and seek a better road. But most of the time it only ends in death."

I just wanted to say, thankyou so much to those of you who actually read through this whole thing! There are about 10 chapters left of this story, and while my main priority is updating on Wattpad, I will make sure I update here too :)

Also, if you've just read the newer chapters I've posted, there are a lot of changes to the earlier chapters that might be worth a read!