Episode 5: How Kitten Became An Evil Mastermind!
And now, my fun and dazzling readers, a flashback to sometime last week:
Kitten Van Cleer sighed, her shoulders slumping as she walked. "Being poor sucks!" She whined to herself as she trudged through the woods out behind the group home the state had put her in. She thought wistfully of the mansion with all the servants and the pool and everything that she'd grown up having.
There had been a forest out back, and she'd gone out there to play sometimes when she was younger. So this, at least, felt more familiar.
She found a clearing and sat down on a log to pout and try again to think of a way out of this mess.
Her dad, Killer Moth, had been caught out last month and exposed as the loser he was. She hadn't had a clue he'd been a secret moth guy... and, by the way? Could she just say to that: as far as criminal themes went? Seriously embarrassing. The cops and the feds had come and seized everything, saying they had to investigate where all his money had come from, and how much of it was tied up with his criminal moth empire or whatever. Like he really even had an empire, just a stupid mad scientist lab or something, she was sure. That, and a bunch of moth babies somewhere that he probably loved more than he ever loved her.
Her mom had run off years ago and left Kitten with just her dad... Maybe she was scared of him? Maybe she'd just been ashamed to have a daughter with such a nut job? Maybe her mom had been right even—maybe she was a loser too, for being his daughter? ...Then again, maybe her dad had turned her mom into a moth woman or something? She'd never heard from her mom after she'd left after all. And wasn't that just a freaky, cheerful thought? "My life sucks so much..." She muttered.
"Why?" A girl's voice asked.
Kitten looked up and saw a cute girl her own age standing there dressed like a fairy, her hands behind her back, and looking all pretty and sparkly. "Um, because... Wait, who are you supposed to be exactly?" She asked once she'd gotten over the momentary stupidness brought on by looking at her, because this girl was for sure not one of the girls she lived in the group home with. They were all irritating, dirty, poor people that she didn't want to touch, let alone kiss. This girl? Oh, she could totally get behind the idea of making out with this girl.
"My name's Gaea." The girl giggled a little in a flirty way. "What's your name?" She asked.
"Um, Kitten... My name's Kitten." Kitten said, blushing a little because she knew she didn't exactly look her best right now, and this Gaea girl looked... way too perfect.
"Well then, Kitten... why are you so sad?" Gaea (aka: Mother Nature) asked, coming over to sit down next to her on the log. "You can tell me. People say I'm a good listener?" She offered, swallowing back some of her nervousness. She'd been watching this girl for the last few days. She'd stayed and been wandering around the forests around Jump City ever since that whole thing with the Teen Titans she'd gone through a while ago. She'd let that Beast Boy boy convince her to use her powers to remake a whole forest for a while. She'd even been thinking about making similar changes on the rest of the planet, but then she'd realized how annoying the whole idea was, so she'd stopped and kicked the boy out of the forest and banned him and his friends from ever camping again. It had been unsettling. She'd been spying on their island on and off though, she hadn't been sure why. A few days ago, the girls had kicked the boys out and moved in two other girl couples. Now that, she'd thought to herself, was an idea she wanted to try. So, she'd changed herself into a teenage girl (because why not?) and decided to go by Gaea (one of her other names) and go try to find another girl to date. So, here she was.
Kitten sighed. "Short story? My dad was a secret supervillain, but he hid it from me and got caught. The new all-girl Teen Titans are, apparently, more competent than the old version." She smirked. And she did hold a grudge for that, against the boys too—Robin especially—for scaring her with that stupid robot of theirs and wrecking her car. She hated her dad way more though—for getting caught and for other grievances. Not like she'd ever be able to do anything about any of it though, she knew. She did not want to end up in jail with her dad, that was for sure. "So, the cops came and kicked me out of my mansion and sent me to the poor house to live with a bunch of unattractive dirty people. My roommate's fat, and she hates me. I so wish I could be rich again."
"And you can't?" Gaea asked, curious. "Be rich again, I mean?"
"Well... I did try robbing a bank once. It worked and all, but there was this giant robot that almost stepped on me... It was scary. I'm kind of scared to try it again." She admitted, feeling a little ashamed of herself for being a coward about it.
"Well... Maybe I could help, then?" Gaea offered. "I'm pretty sure I could beat up a giant robot if I needed to." She considered.
"...Yeah? Like, really? You um, you've got super powers?" Kitten asked, hopeful.
Gaea shrugged. "Mega super powers." She admitted.
Kitten began to think, her mind going all sorts of places. If this girl was telling her the truth, then all she'd need to do would be seduce her, get her definitely on her side... It shouldn't be hard. It wasn't hard to tell Gaea was into her, and no way would it be a bad thing to have a girlfriend as hot as her to play with whenever she wanted... One thing though. "Okay, so, what kind of super powers, exactly?" Kitten asked, looking at Gaea with speculative interest. She had to make sure she wasn't just being lied to or something, after all.
"Oh, a lot of them, I guess." Gaea pointed at a rock a little ways across the field and a bolt of lightning struck it from out of the clear blue sky. She then twirled her finger around in a circle and the fire turned into a small tornado of flames before bursting in a show of sparking fireworks. Next, she snapped her fingers and a tree grew up on the spot, grew as tall as any of the others in the woods. Gaea looked over to Kitten then, and saw the other girl looking at the tree with open wonder. Gaea smirked, feeling confident now that she'd won herself a girlfriend for sure. She looked at Kitten's lips and thought lusty things about how nice it would be to kiss them soon. "So, what do you think?" She asked.
Kitten swallowed. "Wow..." She said, looking over at Gaea with new respect. "I think I say hell yeah. Let's go get rich."
Gaea smiled. "We... could also do other things?" She offered. "Like... we could kiss, maybe?" She asked, hopeful.
Kitten smirked. So easy. She got a confident, seductive look in her eyes. If there was one thing she was definitely good at, it was getting a girl to fall for her. "Yeah... I think we could definitely to that..." She said, moving in and touching Gaea's hand, sliding her fingers up her arm, even as she moved in more and touched her bangs with her other hand. Gaea just looked at her, swallowing and seeming fluttery and nervous. Kitten smirked again, totally turned on. She moved in and kissed this girl, sweetly at first, and, sure enough, Gaea melted for her. She pressed in, deepening the kiss, kissing her thoroughly for long, long minutes...
When Kitten finally stopped and backed away a few breaths, Gaea felt flush all over and meeped. "...I love you..." She told her impetuously, stroking her hair and looking at her lips, entranced with wondering how those lips had possibly made her feel so good. She'd... never kissed anyone before, not in all the billions of years she'd been alive. Why not, she wondered? Oh, sure, part of it was that it was only recently that she'd thought to try looking like a human, but, really, that was no good excuse. I'm so stupid sometimes... she thought to herself, moving in so she could kiss Kitten's lips again.
"Ah-ah." Kitten said, knowing that playing a little hard to get right now would be just the thing to make sure this girl was hooked. "Time enough for that later. For now... wouldn't you like it if I took you out on a date first?" She asked.
Gaea swallowed and nodded enthusiastically. "Definitely..." She said, heart beating fast with eager anticipation.
Kitten smiled, putting just a hint of shyness in it for effect. Inside though, she was already daydreaming about making out with this girl on a queen-sized bed, back in her mansion where she belonged. If she worked it right, she considered, she could even get revenge on the Titans without them ever being any the wiser. No way was she going to be as stupid as her dad was, dressing up as a moth man and flitting around saying I am Killer Moth—fear me! Tremble before my army of moth monsters! Sheesh! He'd been practically begging for a jail cell, hadn't he? So embarrassing.
No, she was going to be smart about this.
And, now that the flashback's over, lets check in on Nightwing and his boyfriend... and his sidekicks... and, what, his minions now apparently?
The six Teen Titans Young Justice boys dragged themselves into Kid Flash's swanky, spacious uptown loft apartment. The killer view did little to lift their spirits though. "We got beat like a bunch of chumps, yo." Beast Boy complained, throwing his self down on a couch. "It's humiliatin!"
"You say that like we really had a chance of winning." Speedy said.
"Hey!" Beast Boy said. "We got skills. You don't know. Coulda easily gone the other way."
Aqualad scoffed. "Right."
"From a tactical standpoint, we were rather overmatched, I have to admit." Cyborg said in that faux high-class way of talking he affected sometimes. It was true though. Starfire and Blackfire had super strength, flight, and solar powered energy blasts. Terra could control the ground beneath their feet. Jinx could make them unlucky and cause general unpredictable chaos. Ravager had been trained by Slade to be a killer, she used swords and didn't have much restraint about it. And Raven, she had enough magic powers to probably conquer the world if she ever went full out demon—maybe even the whole dimension, if you believed all the hype about her dad. By comparison, they were hot stuff against a guy like Cinderblock, sure, but it didn't take a genius to figure that, against the Titans girls, they'd lose like chumps. Which, duh, is just what had happened. He didn't think that made them losers though, not really. It just hadn't been a fair fight, that was all... Riiiight.
Nightwing groaned. "Whatever. It's over, can we just move on already?" He pleaded, not really wanting to overthink this too much.
"Sure poser, whatever you want." Speedy mocked.
Nightwing turned on him with a growl. "Do you want a go at me, minion? Is that what you're saying here?"
"Minion?" Aqualad said, looking at Nightwing like he had a screw loose... which, yeah, that was a possibility, he had to admit.
"Yeah, don't you get it, Garth?" Speedy said (using Aqualad's real name). "Poser boy here has a Napoleon complex. Oh, he tries to hide it, sure, but he's really just a tin-pot dictator with height issues in disguise."
Nightwing gritted his teeth. "That's it! Training room! Now!" He challenged.
"Oh, I am going to enjoy this." Speedy smirked. Sure, he was ragged, but, he figured, so was poser boy, and, on an equal playing field, he had faith in his ability to kick butt. Was past time, really, in his estimation.
The two boys marched off, Aqualad following along for obvious boyfriend support reasons.
Kid Flash though, wasn't so much into that sort of thing and wanted to drown his embarrassment and humiliation in high-calorie ice cream and cookies. He had a fast metabolism, after all, which did give him certain junk food consumption advantages over the rest of the slow populace. He looked over to the kitchen and saw Beat Boy and Cyborg were already there though, making sandwiches and chocolate shakes. He stopped and considered. He should be annoyed, but, oddly enough, he smiled to himself, it was actually kind of nice to have other people around. Even if they were clowns. He looked around the place, thinking how much more of a home this felt like now. His eyes stopped though, looking where a gold statue of an Egyptian god whose name escaped him at the moment used to be.
Quickly, he looked around the place and noticed paintings and other valuables gone. His eyes widened and he, affecting a causal air, walked out of the room to go check on his secret room. He opened the door and stared. Empty... "I've been robbed." He said in a small, incredulous voice, sinking to his knees.
"Dude, I didn't know this room was here." Cyborg said conversationally, walking up next to him while eating a monster-sized sandwich as Beast Boy walked past them and entered the room to look around.
"Yeah, but why's it empty? We could, I don't know, put in a sauna or something. Get some of that good relaxation therapy going on, am I right?" Beast Boy asked, looking back to the other two boys. "Dude, why you on the floor looking all angsty like that?" He questioned Kid Flash.
Kid Flash quickly got to his feet and cleared his throat. "Um, nothing. Just... exhausted from the fight, that's all." He said.
"Well, get some rest guy." Cyborg patted him on the back. "We can talk sauna possibilities some other time." He said, leading Kid Flash away from the secret room.
A few minutes later Kid Flash was on the couch, next to Beast Boy and Cyborg, watching the news while he drowned his sorrows in double chocolate mocha chip ice cream and Orios. Apparently, five other places besides here had been robbed, including a bank and a jewelry exchange, all while they'd been involved in their ill-fated grudge match. It was one hell of a coincidence that his place was one of them though, right?
Nightwing walked in then, staff balanced over his shoulder blades, looking smug. "Hey everybody, congratulate me on my victory!" He said.
Aqualad clenched his fists and resisted the compulsion to tackle Nightwing and pummel him. Oh, he really wanted to. So smug!
Cyborg and Beast Boy gave half-hearted, clearly only obligatory congratulations (only because they basically didn't want Nightwing to throw a Robin tantrum). Kid Flash barely noticed though, lost in thought. "Hey boyfriend, weren't you paying attention? I just totally humiliated Speedy over there. Don't you think that earns me some love?" He asked.
Kid Flash blinked out of his thoughts. "Oh, yeah, love you and all that. Listen... can we talk somewhere... you know, private?" He asked.
"Yeah, go with him. I so don't want to know what you two get up to behind closed doors, am I right?" Cyborg asked.
"So right." Aqualad agreed.
"Um, right, okay?" Nightwing agreed, letting his boyfriend lead him out of the room, and towards the secret room. As Nightwing went, he looked around. "Say, I didn't notice before, but weren't there more paintings in this room when we left?" He asked as he was hurried off into the room, Kid Flash closing the door behind him as soon as they were in.
"Yeah... That's um, kind of what I wanted to talk to you about." He said, looking around and feeling awkward about all of this. But, Nightwing was his boyfriend now, right? You talked about this kind of stuff with your boyfriend, and he'd have your back, right?
Nightwing looked around the place. "A secret room?" He asked. "An empty secret room?" He looked at his boyfriend, going serious. "Wally, hey... level with me. Were you robbed?" He asked, using Kid Flash's real name. Wally West.
"Yeah, I kind of really was." Kid Flash confessed.
Nightwing looked around, pacing a few paces. "What kind of stuff did you have in here, anyway?" He asked.
"Yeah... about that. You've got my back, right? I mean, you're my boyfriend now... and I can tell you stuff, and you'll have my back, no matter what, right?" He asked.
"Yeah, of course. You know that." Nightwing said, going over to hold his hands and gaze into his eyes. Because, really, it's not like he had all that much else going for him in life, right? And, yeah... he was pretty sure he was, you know, in love too. Not that he'd quite said it yet. "What's going on?" He asked in a deep, meaningful, sexy voice that he'd somehow gotten the knack of ever since he'd become Nightwing.
Kid Flash actually blushed a little. Damn my boyfriend's hot, he thought to himself with a little of a smug smile. He quickly sobered though. "Well, the thing is, all this? The fancy apartment, my summer place in Keystone City...? A certain villa I own in Cancun...? Well, you know, being a handsome, dashing superhero who's adored by the masses doesn't generally pay all that well."
"Tell me about it." Nightwing agreed.
"I mean, sure, I make some money from licensing and doing some advertising spots, but that all goes to charity. For the image, you know?" He questioned.
"Makes sense." Nightwing nodded, seeing the point.
"Well, so I sort of hit on this idea at one point, to, um, supplement my income. So I'd have the time to devote myself to being a hero full time. The greater good, right?" He prevaricated.
"Wally, just tell me what you're going to tell me, okay?" Nightwing asked, getting a bad feeling about this.
"Yeah, that's... Okay, so, you know how all these villain types always have great cash flow and everything? I guess I just figured, why let them keep it?" He ventured.
"Oh, so you've been robbing super-villains?" Nightwing said, relieved. "A morally gray area, to be sure, but I don't have a problem with it." He had to admit. After all, he understood that not every boy was lucky enough to be adopted by some weird rich dude who liked to dress up as a bat and beat up clowns and all. Clowns, he shivered a little, remembering some of the bad times.
"Yeah... It kind of started out that way." Kid Flash admitted.
"...What are you saying, exactly?" Nightwing asked.
"Well, you know, rich people, what are they really doing with all that money they have anyway?" The same thing he was doing, really—living it up. But, to his way of thinking, it was either them or him, and, if that was the choice, he was going to pick him.
Nightwing let out a breath. "Wally, you know that's wrong, right?"
"Yeah, but why, really?" He asked. "I mean, what have they done to earn it more than I have? I save, like, hundreds of lives in a day sometimes. You know that tsunami that hit Taiwan last month? No one died when it hit because of me, not even a house pet. What's that worth compared to, I don't know, selling cigarettes or something?"
"Not much, admittedly..." Nightwing said, pondering it seriously. "And this is a seriously kickass apartment." He allowed, nodding to himself. "Alright." He finally said, positively. "Consider me on board."
"Yeah? Seriously?" Kid Flash asked.
Nightwing shrugged. "Sure, why not? You made good arguments, and, like you said, you're my boyfriend. I kind of have to take your side anyway, right?" He asked.
"Yeah... yeah, I guess so." Kid Flash said, feeling a little teary actually as he stepped into him and they kissed deeply and long.
"So, um..." Nightwing said, blushing a few long minutes later. "Who, um, who do you think was behind all this? Who knew all this stuff was here?" He asked his boyfriend.
Terra looked on as H.I.V.E. Island got steadily closer. She was a little nervous, even though she was trying not to let that show through to the girl who was sitting on the rock next to her. Terra had her arm around Jinx's shoulder as she flew them low across the water on a slab of rock, Jinx snuggled up to her as they both watched the view.
Sometimes, Terra reflected, having the powers she had was just... really amazing. Normal girls could sit on the edge of a cliff with their girlfriend and watch the water, but how many of them could fly the cliff over the water like Harry Potter with Buckbeak the hippogriff while they did it? It took her breath away a little just at the moment—not only the view, but the girl next to her... She'd never had a steady girlfriend before. She'd never really had that kind of life... until now at least, she guessed.
Part of her was still worried she'd do something wrong, or something would happen to mess it all up... She thought that Jinx would probably stick with her if that happened. Still, she didn't want to put that to the test, and she didn't want her new life to change either. She liked living at Titans Tower and being a Teen Titan—loved it, really... Even she and Raven seemed like they were starting to be actual friends by this point, and no way had she thought that would ever happen...
Now here she was, going to meet Jinx's brother for the first time. Well, the first time in person anyway. She and Jinx had talked to him and the other H.I.V.E. guys by video chat in their room a few times so far, and she'd decided she liked them... well, maybe except for Gizmo. His voice was really kind of annoying, you know? And he used his voice kind of a lot... Not that she'd told Jinx that—those guys were kind of like her family. Mammoth definitely was at any rate, and Gizmo was his boyfriend, so it would be really awkward if she said wow, you're brother has a really annoying boyfriend who's... really tiny, and how's that work by the way? Not that... she really wanted to have it explained to her, because, yeah? No, she did not.
"Almost there..." Terra said.
"Mm-hmm." Jinx said, kind of sounding dreamy. "Terra?" She asked, sitting up straight enough that she could look into Terra's eyes.
"Yeah?" Terra asked, curious, looking back into Jinx's eyes. It seemed like such an intimate moment for some reason, and her nervousness fled in the face of that somehow, which she was happy and relieved about.
Jinx quirked a smile. "I just wanted to tell you, you know, in case I haven't said it to you before?" She told her, moving forward and giving her a brief kiss, sweet and heartfelt, before meeting her gaze again. "You're probably, like, the best girl to date in the history of the world. At least, I think so." She told her. Because it was true. Terra was super romantic, and so genuine. Jinx thought Terra had melted her heart from the first time they'd kissed, and she was pretty sure it had stayed in a happy puddle state ever since.
Terra felt her cheeks heat a little. "I am, huh?" She asked, feeling a little shy, but... in a good way.
"Yeah, you are." Jinx affirmed, snuggling back up to her as they came in closer to the island.
"I don't know, I kind of get the feeling she doesn't really like me that much." Gizmo said, sulking a little, sitting around the coffee table in the H.I.V.E. Island livingroom. Billy-Numerous and See-More were sitting around it with him. His boyfriend, Mammoth, was in the kitchen and had firmly banned all three of them from entering or interrupting his genius in any way. One thing Gizmo had learned that you did not mess with was his boyfriend's chef time.
"I don't think she does, really." Billy-Numerous said, feeling like it kind of did have to be said.
See-More nodded when Gizmo looked to him. "Yeah, sorry man, but it is kind of obvious." He had to admit, even though he wished he didn't have to say so. His eye caught on one of Billy's doubles as he dusted and he was momentarily distracted by his buns swaying to and fro.
Billy leaned over and whispered. "You're totally checking out my butt right now, aren't you?"
See-More felt his face redden a little. "So what if I am? I'm allowed." He protested.
"Oh, I know." Billy said, feeling a little smug that he'd gotten See-More to blush that way. He had twelve of his other selves spread around the compound tidying up the place. They had company coming, after all. They had to make a good impression, for Jinx's sake. It hadn't been as much fun around here since she'd left to hook up with that Terra girl. Gizmo had had the idea that they could convince Terra to join up with them, and they'd get Jinx back that way. It's what they'd been talking about just now, as a matter of fact. Except, Gizmo was worried that Terra didn't like him.
"Why though? I mean, I've never met the girl. You know, except when we've talked to her those times. I don't get it." Gizmo complained.
"She probably thinks you're annoying." Billy said, having that gotta say it feeling again. He got those sometimes.
"Annoying?" Gizmo protested. "Who? Me?"
"...It's probably just that she could tell you were trying to sales pitch her. Some people don't like that kind of thing. Its why door-to-door salesmen get punched sometimes." See-More explained.
"I had Mammoth do that one time." Gizmo said, but he knew he'd never live it down now. He could kind of see their point though, now that they put it that way. "Yeah... okay, I guess I can see that." He admitted. "So... What do I do? How do I get her to like me?" He asked.
"Well, it's a big cliche, but you could try just being yourself?" See-More offered.
"Myself, huh?" Gizmo thought about it. "Yeah... You're right." He said.
At that moment, the doorbell rang and there was a commotion from the kitchen. A few moments later, a pleading Mammoth poked his head out. "Stall." He begged.
Obviously, he needed more time to finish his cheffing. "Don't worry, big guy. We got this." Gizmo reassured him. "Come on guys. Let's go make a good impression." He instructed, rubbing his hands together in anticipation and going to answer the door.
See-More looked to Billy. "He totally doesn't get it, does he?"
"Um, well... I kind of think this is Gizmo being himself." Billy shrugged.
"Oh, yeah. I guess I hadn't thought of that." See-More admitted as they followed along to go greet Jinx and Terra.
Next Episode: New Teen Titans Go vs The Date Night Invasion!
In our next show... Sisterly secrets revealed! Drama turned on its head, for the purposes of providing a quick laugh! Young Justice, just out of the gate, suffers a startling setback! Is Mammoth really such a great cook? Yes, dear hungry readers—as it turns out, he is! It's the H.I.V.E.'s insidious wood burning pizza oven, vs (underdogs in the fight) Salad Boy and the Meatball Marauder! Do they even stand a chance? Stick around and find out!
Oh... and there might also be spaceships showing up at some point or something. It'll be fun!