Author's note: For those of you who don't understand Jaune is suffering from depression and anxiety. He's lashing out in blind rage, frustrated with himself. Out of experience, my own depression and anxiety has led to picking fights with bigger people.
Jaune awoke in a hospital bed. The moonlight shone through window, illuminating the small vase of wilting flowers. He noticed his belongings in his backpack in the corner of the room and Ash resting next to the bed. Examining the table near the window, he found various pictures and "get well" cards. One picture of Neptune and Weiss caused a sharp pain in his chest. Retrieving the bag, he pulled out some dried meat and set it down a generous pile for the when leopard cub wakes up. Stroking the soft fur while he slept, Jaune whispered, "Good boy."
Picking up Crocea Mors and his pants, he headed to the roof. Taking in the cold air of the night, he removed the hospital gown and slipped on clean underwear and his pants. Unsheathing the blade and setting down the scabbard, he began to put his restless muscles to work, jumping and slashing the empty air. Ducking and rolling, as if dodging an enemy's strike, he shot up behind his imaginary enemy in a twirl, quickly slicing the figment of his imagination in half. In frustration, he threw his blade, embedding it into door that separated the stairs from the roof.
"It's not good enough," he scolded himself as he retrieved his sword. He grew in his frustration as he practiced his swordplay more. Daybreak was a long time from when he started, but it didn't stop him.
"Jaune?" Pyrrha had to quickly raise her shield to block the flying blade.
"Oh, it's you," her shirtless leader said coldly at her appearance. Retrieving his blade, he caught her off guard by crashing his shield into her side, "Your stance is weak."
"Jaune, I do not wish to do this," she pleaded as she defended herself from his blade, "you just woke up and I don't want to hurt you." She was met with silence and another strike from his blade which she parried with her spear, "Jaune, please."
Still Jaune gave no answer besides his carefully placed strikes from his sword. Pyrrha was forced to fight back as she stepped forward, only to find thin air. Looking around she saw that her leader was nowhere to be found. Instinctively, she lunged forward, barely dodging the blow as he came crashing down, sword first. Rolling towards her, he swiped at her legs, forcing her to jump. Using the momentum of his missed attack, he twirled around allowing for a shield bash with his other arm while she was still in mid-air. "You have to fight back if you're going to stop me," he sadistically uttered, "and make it hurt."
Lifting herself up, she raised Milo in its shotgun form. "Jaune, what's wrong?" she hesitantly brought it to her face to aim it at her beloved friend, "Please, I don't want to hurt you."
"Go ahead, I'm done living," he murmured as he slowly walked towards her. With his sword raised, he discarded his shield, ready to strike once more. He brought down his sword, forcing her to move out of the way.
Ducking, rolling and getting behind her opponent, she shot the dust round point blank. With a tear in her eyes, she whispered, "I'm sorry," as Jaune lost consciousness once again.
Jaune woke with a start to see his partner at the side of his hospital bed. Looking down in shame, unable to meet her eyes he finally spoke, "I'm sorry. I attacked you out of frustration and nearly..."
"You know I'll forgive you anyway," she took his hand for comfort; "I just want to know why?"
"You told me that I wouldn't get it wrong if it was the truth," he started, "what if my feelings are wrong? What if I'm just meant to be alone? I didn't mean to lash out like that. I just… I don't know what I would have done if that fight went on."
"Jaune, it's okay, you couldn't kill me if you tried. And if Weiss can't see just how wonderful you are," she rested a palm on his face, "I believe the saying is she's just as blind as a bat."
"Thanks Pyrrha," he smiled. "You should get to class, it's getting pretty late. Please bring Ash with you, he needs exercise back at the school."
"I'll bring your homework by later," the redhead reluctantly stood up and left the hospital room, leading the snow leopard cub out of the room.
As soon as she left, he finally let the sadness flow from his eyes. "I don't deserve your words, Pyrrha," he silently sobbed to himself, "your kindness, your friendship, all of it, I don't deserve any of it. I shouldn't have woken up."
We go to the same school, and she lives across the hall, but we're still worlds apart. Sure, I have people who call me "friend" but they can never understand what it's like. I'm surrounded by amazing fighters, people who've had years of training under their belts. I've never been in such a place with so many people yet felt so alone…
"Hey, what are you reading, Ruby?" Yang asked her younger sister.
"Hmm, I don't know," she said looking up from the small black book, "I found it in the library, seems like someone wrote their thoughts in it. It's pretty depressing though."
"Let me see," she picked up the book and quickly skimmed through the pages. Her eyes widened after a few seconds, letting out a small gasp. "I don't think we should be reading this, Rubes. You'd be surprised about who wrote it," Yang put the book down.
"That's weird, coming from you, Yang. I mean you telling me not to violate someone's privacy," the young leader smiled as she read further.
Tomorrow we're about to embark on our first mission. We've chosen as a group to take this search and destroy mission with team RWBY. This mission is to take on hordes of the creatures of grimm, their mission in mind is to somehow investigate the White Fang. In light of the events of the past few weeks, and what had just transpired earlier, I'm hoping to for this mission to end my lowly existence.
In the last few months, I've grown fond of the one her friends call "the ice queen". Oh who am I kidding, I've fallen and I've fallen hard. Sadly my feelings aren't returned. Despite my many attempts in asking for a date, through different means like singing, and elaborate schemes, I decided to take Pyrrha's advice. I went to her before preparing for this mission, heart in hand, asking as sincerely as possible. I didn't want dinner, I didn't want some stupid, fancy thing, I just wanted a chance to get to know her better, I wanted to know who Weiss Schnee is.
I've come to realize something out of my rejection. My life is just as disposable as the dust she uses. I'm only a tool for others, to be used and then thrown away when worn out. There's always going to be someone to replace me as leader. There's always going to be someone else who holds her heart. There's nothing special about me, I'm not good at fighting and I never will be, and I'm never going to be good enough for her. If I can at least die fighting, no one has to take the blame for my death.
"That explains a lot," Ruby said quietly as she put the small journal down. "How could I not realize his depression?!" she questioned herself, tears now forming, "I even talked to him the night before the train incident, how could I have been so stupid to let him fight like that? He even told us he was fighting to die, and I just ignored it!"
"The doctors said that he'll be fine," Yang pulled her younger sister into a hug. "It's been a week, so he should be waking up soon. We should go see if he's up tomorrow."
"I'm a terrible friend, Yang," Ruby cried into her sister's chest.
"We all are," Yang said in a comforting voice.