Hi so here is another chapter. I am going to probably publish another one after this so let me know what you think.

Disclaimer-Nothing is mine just this story.

Also like i said in the last chapter the historical time and therefore some of Alice's views are based on the Victorian times. Also i know this scene didn't happen and might be a bit heated for some readers but i thought there was no way that that kiss scene in 1x02 had to be the only time.

And let me know what you think.

If You Really Love Someone

Chapter 6-Alice-Push the Pain Away

Events-As Alice and Cyrus make camp for the night Alice makes a decision that might have long-lasting consequences for the relationship slowly forming between her and Cyrus.

Looking back it was easily defined as a laughable moment. Something they could discuss between the two of them and laugh about when they were young and both so clueless about how the other one worked. When they could read each other like an open book it seemed so much easier to laugh at all of the stupid mistakes that had been made especially in light of what they had gone through both as a couple and as individuals during their stay in Wonderland. But right there and then it had hurt and all of those insecurities that she had been fighting against had come to the surface without warning and had viciously made Alice re-evaluate herself.

But the events that had taken place post this incident were not of concern. Right now the only thing that was of any real concern was that Alice for some unknown reason (but not really unknown) had decided to make a pass at the first man she found herself feeling anything towards…

But more on that later.

Alice and Cyrus had gone to the Mellow March and pitched up camp there for two days. They used the fireflies to cross into the middle of the Mellow March so Alice could try the softer sticker sugar that swirled in the middle. She didn't wait for the spoon that Cyrus offered her instead she decided to stick her fingers in, she had twirled her two fingers around the sticky goodness and then plunged them in her mouth with virtually no concept of ladylike behaviour she had been raised with. Instead she had moaned-a little bit like some sort of greedy child-around her fingers and had only realised that perhaps her behaviour might have been somewhat un-lady like when she had opened her eyes pulled her fingers from her mouth and noticed that Cyrus had crouched down next to her and was looking decidedly away.

"Sorry" Alice apologised grinning. "I err…I supposed I got carried away and I…I've never had something this nice before"

Cyrus smiled at her but there was something different about his eyes. It was almost like he didn't have any eyes, they had gone almost black with some unknown emotion. He swallowed harshly his throat bobbing and Alice watched wondering for a second what would happen if she reached out and touched the skin underneath his chin. That thought however was quickly turned around when he turned his head to see her effectively cutting off her view.

There was a pause where they stared at each other. They seemed to keep doing that Alice thought to herself. They seemed to keep staring at each other, catching each other in little moments and holding the gaze so that they could almost see into each other's soul. Or perhaps Alice was finally going mad. There was a reason why the Hatter was called…well the Mad Hatter. Wonderland had a funny way of destroying any sense of reality when you were inside for too long case in point how nothing had change for her and everything around her had changed when she had gone back to 1850.

"Don't apologise" Cyrus said standing up and wincing slightly. He held out his hand and Alice took it. It was getting pathetic at how desperate she was to touch him. Every time she touched him she found that she was almost sparking some kind of magic off him. As if their bodies knew that they should be touching more. It was foolish and it was dangerous and it should have been an inclination for Alice to stop, to not take things further than it seemed they already were but she did not. Which in hindsight was a very foolish thing to do.

She let go of his hand and then internally winced because there was no way that the action had not come across as a little strange.

Cyrus however did not seem to notice. Alice decided to not ponder on weather or not that was a good thing or a bad thing. Instead she decided to focus on getting back to the dry land covered in grass rather than getting knee deep in the sticky mess. It was all fun when you were eating melting marshmallow but the truth of the matter was it made a right mess. She hoped Cyrus had something that she could clean her hands with.

Once she had walked and on more than one occasion had to hop and skip over things she manged to gain securer footing and she sat down on a rock.

"I apologise Cyrus my behaviour with a handful of marshmallow was rather…unladylike."

There an apology that her mother would have been proud to hear her make.

Cyrus bent down so he was crouching next to her.

"You don't have to apologise to me Alice. One of the greatest things about Wonderland is that you never have to apologise for being anything other than yourself. Well…unless you run afoul of the Caterpillar and then you do have to be something your not"

Alice laughed. On more than one occasion she had ran into the feared dealer of Wonderland's darker secrets and she had seen what happened to people both when they worked for him and when they betrayed him. Either way she was glad she had managed to remain far abreast from the purple opium smoker.

"Well that was very good fun" she said trying to forget her apology. Cyrus grinned at her and there was something about his smile that made her feel infectious. And here she had believed that all the rumours about love sickness was just that…rumours made by silly little girls who read too many penny romance novels. Wow she had been wrong when it came to that hadn't she? She had been wrong about so much.

"Where do you think we should go next?" She asked pulling herself out of her thoughts standing up and then pulling her hand out of Cyrus's before she did something stupid.

(Not that that would stop her in the end)

She brushed some of the mess of the corner of her shirt and missed completely the look of dejection mingled with resignation on Cyrus's face when she had pulled his hand out of her own. She didn't know about the thoughts swirling in his head and the way his hand seemed to reach out to grab a lock of her hair that was coming loose before it was snatched back of it's own volition.

She really had to do something about that. Wasn't there a rumour coming over from Paris that a few of the actresses from the theatre were cutting it short?

"I need to find another hair tie when we get a chance" she said smiling. "I fear my hair is becoming a nightmare again. I should just cut the whole thing off into a bob-the kind you see in the newspapers from Europe, would make things a whole lot easier" she gestured with her hand to her chin but before she could let her hand rest by her side again she found it was grabbed by Cyrus his heavy ringed fingers pressing into her own as he crowded closer to her so that it felt like their whole bodies were pressed against each other. Alice blinked and then swallowed. She tried not to press back against him-she might be wilder than some girls but she was not a complete lovesick fool, despite the way she seemed to be acting around him. Instead she forced an expression on her face that she hoped was one of polite confusion.

"Don't do that" was all he said. "Don't cut your hair, Alice I don't think I could bare it."

There was something about the tone in his voice that stirred her heart and she found herself holding her breath when he reached out and touched one of the offending locks with the pad of his finger. The very air around them seemed to still, the birds, the crickets, everything seemed to come to a stand still as the atmosphere became thick with something unnameable. Alice was filled with something that was slowly rising up inside of her steadily pulsing through her veins, her blood, her very core. It took her a second to realise that it was desire and it was strong.

There was a second where she and Cyrus stared at each other and she realised that his hands were still wrapped around hers, they were close, so close in fact that she could count nearly every eyelash that framed his eyes the pupils of which she noticed were blown black as if the desire that was slowly stoking her was filling him with the same feeling. For a split second they stared at each other and then it happened.

Alice wasn't sure weather or not she was the one who had started it. But someone started it and soon enough their mouths were crashing down on top of each other. Cyrus mouth was on hers and they were kissing. Alice opened her mouth without even realising what she had done and she felt Cyrus's tongue probe her mouth. Her right hand came to his hair and her left wrapped around his shoulders to pull him closer and his own framed her hair and the small of her lower back as if he was as desperate for her touch as she was for his.

For a long time (or so it seemed) they were pressed up against each other kissing like it was their last moment in Wonderland. Alice had never felt like this of that she was sure, a desperation that was bubbling up inside of her and she thought to herself in that brief moment (where she found she was capable of thoughts, before Cyrus's mouth pulled away from hers only to attach itself to just under her chin pressing little butterfly kisses down her neck until he found a point that made her gasp and her arms tighten in his hair) that if Cyrus wanted to take her here and now on the floor…in the grass like some woman with no thought of a good marriage on her mind…then she would let him. She would go on her back happily as long as he kept kissing and touching her because every second that he was made her feel like she was burning up in the most pleasant way possible.

Alice tightened her hand in his hair and pulled and Cyrus gave a short gasp into her neck, she dragged his head back up so he could kiss her again but it was then that he stopped suddenly as if he had been doused in cold water.

"No" He said and his voice was rough and dangerous like sandpaper. He pushed himself back away from her and suddenly it was like Alice had been doused in cold water. Whatever moment they had, had between the two of them had been roughly ended and Alice found her body was cooling as well as her heart.

"Alice, I'm sorry that…that…shouldn't have…I shouldn't have…this…this…shouldn't have…stupid, gods this was stupid…Alice I'm sorry this shouldn't…cannot happen I...err…" And he looked around as if he wished he could be anywhere else. Alice started at him and she found suddenly that she was near to tears.

"I need a moment" she managed to croak out. Cyrus nodded looking utterly miserable-not that that was much help at this very minute but he turned and walked away. She waited until she could no longer hear his footsteps and then she dropped to the floor, shoved her sleeve into her mouth and burst into tears.

Alice wasn't a crier. She didn't cry easily hadn't cried when her father had disbelieved her, when he had wanted to send her away, not even when her mother had died-well…not really. But now she was sobbing like a child.

She had to pull herself together least Cyrus know what was going on. He didn't want anything with her that extended beyond the typical mistress-genie relationship and she had to respect that. She wiped her eyes and took a deep breath. She still had a realm to explore, she still had a home she didn't want to go back to and she still had three wishes that now she found that she wasn't completely against using. She just had to push the pain away.

Well Alice thought bitterly taking another deep breath and allowing herself a thought to her mother, to her home and how it had turned on her instantly, pushing the pain away had always worked before.

Please Read and Review, as i say next chapter will be Cyrus's point of view.

Enjoy.