Stand By Me - Ben E. King

The trip home from D.C. was insightful, to say the least. I learned that Peggy and my grandmother were very close while overseas and that Bucky had a huge crush on her. Steve swore he hadn't put the pieces together but upon Peggy's flashback, he remembered her. He said I looked a lot like her which is probably what caused Peggy to fall back to that time. Steve was very forthcoming with stories from the war and some humorous tales of his best friend trying his best to hit on my grandmother. When we reached the city it felt like time had flown right by and I really wasn't ready for us to head back to reality. But here I was sitting behind the bar, back at work, warding off the unwanted attention of the douchebag who had single-handedly brought Steve into my life.

"So spill it, how was your trip?" Caroline grilled me.

"It was wonderful," I said with a wide smile spreading across my face. I let my mind wander back to the candlelit take-out dinner and Steve's laughter, wishing I was back there once again.

"You're glowing, Joe," Car said, interrupting my daydream.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said as I tried to avoid her and began washing some of the dirty glasses.

"You totally did it!" she nearly shrieked.

"Hush, keep your voice down," I barked out at her before taking a glance around the bar and letting out a sigh of relief as Don, our last patron of the night, walked out the door.

"Oh, I'm coming over tonight after work. I want all the dirty details," she deviously smiled.

"There are no dirty details to discuss," I replied, making sure to stress the word 'dirty'. I dried my hands before throwing the towel at Caroline and sticking my tongue out at her in a childlike way. I let my mind wander back to that moment when things shifted for Steve and me, the moment we gave each other everything we had left to give. I couldn't picture anything more perfect than that time where we became one. It wasn't something I could even put into words and I didn't know how I could convey that to Caroline even if I tried. The only way to describe it was perfect.

~.~

"So how was he?" Caroline asked as she plopped down on my couch.

"Caroline!" I blushed, "I don't see how sharing his sex skills is any of your business."

"Oh come on! I already told you, Gib is it for me so I've got to vicariously live through you now. Please," she begged. I rolled my eyes as I walked back into my bedroom, changing into some comfy shorts and a tank before walking back out to join her on the couch. "Was he like super dominant? Oooooh did he use some of that brute strength to manhandle you?" she asked wiggling her eyebrows.

"Car! Oh my God, you are nuts," I chuckled as she handed me my glass of wine she had poured.

"I bet it was super romantic then," she thought aloud. "Were there candles?"

"Well..." I smiled.

"Of course there were candles. Does this man fail at anything?" she sighed. "So there were candles, what else?"

"It wasn't some elaborate thing. It was simple but romantic and it just felt completely natural," I replied. "It was just perfect, Car."

"Was it perfect or was he perfect? How perfect is he? I mean I've seen the man's feet!" Caroline asked trying to dig a little bit deeper.

"I'll just say he was very impressive," I coyly answered.

"And what does very impressive detail?" she continued.

"Oh my God Car, I'm not going to tell you his dick size! I don't want you thinking of his junk every time you see him," I chuckled.

"Why the hell not? It's not like I wasn't already lookin'! I mean the man is hard not to check out." she said wiggling her eyebrows for effect.

"You aren't going to leave this alone are you?" I asked which received a shake of her head. "Let's put it this way...He's well above average."

"So the serum helped enlarge more than just his muscle mass and height huh?" she grinned. "How in the hell are you even walking then? I'd assume he used some of that strength to pound you into the next town. Add in the fact that man is fucking packing, you should be walking funny for the rest of the god damn year!" I shook my head in disbelief as she sat and pondered some more before adding, "Well remind me to call your Gyno tomorrow. I'm sure something needs to be replaced because he's bound to have pounded something loose."

"Jesus fucking Christ, Caroline!" I shouted.

"What?" she said giving me a devious smile.

"He wasn't rough with me at all so drop the crazy shit," I shook my head.

"Not even a little?" she asked in disbelief, "Unbelievable! This man has the strength of a God and he's not even being resourceful with it in the bedroom. Tell him it's time to drop the gentleman charade and manhandle your ass a little. I'm done with this nice guy bullshit, we need the real deal."

"Soooooo...How are things with you and Gib? How is the wedding planning going?" I asked trying to change the subject.

"Gib has been working a lot to help build up our budget for the wedding but," she began but then paused, "Wait a hot minute. I see what you are trying to do here. We aren't done talking about Captain Huge Cock yet."

"Yes, we are," I replied.

"Um, no we're not. You haven't even told me how many mindblowing orgasm he induced. Did he go down on you? I bet he's an A+ in the oral department. All business and smooth talking with that mouth but it's best work is doing dirty things to you. It's aways the quiet and reserved ones that have the most talent behind closed doors," she rambled on.

"More than enough and he didn't. Can we stop with this yet?" I sighed. I didn't have a problem sharing this kind of information with my best friend. She was more of a sister to me than anything but I knew there were some things that were better left not shared, at least for Steve's privacy. Yes, girls are bound to share things with their besties but the fact that Steve was a virgin was something that didn't need to be shared with anyone else but Steve and I and I intended to keep it that way.

"Okay, I get it. You don't wanna share. But since you brought up the wedding, I hope you like the color eggplant," she said sitting her glass of wine down on the coffee table and crossing her arms as she sat back and gave me a challenging look.

"You're the bride," I replied before taking a sip of my wine and shrugging my shoulders. A hideous bridesmaid's dress I could handle, betraying Steve's privacy and trust was something I couldn't.

"So the wedding invitation...Is that a plus one now?" she smiled.

"Most definitely," I replied, unable to fight the smile on my face.

I wasn't aware I had fallen asleep on the couch. The last I had known, I was watching The Notebook with Car as we sipped on wine. She was gone now, the living room only lit with the small glow from the TV and a knock on the door the only noise filling the apartment. "Coming," I shouted as I stood up from the couch and stretched. I glanced at the clock on the stove as I walked towards the door. It was close to six in the morning, the sun would be rising soon. I opened the door to find Steve standing there. He was in his superhero gear, head hung low until I had opened the door completely. When he looked up I could see the condition he was in. His blemish-free skin covered in soot and dirt, his hair a mess from his helmet and his lip split open, the blood dried but not cleaned up. "Steve?"

"I just wanted to see you," his voice was low, his eyes holding a look of defeat.

"Come in," I said as I stood back and held the door open for him. He paused a moment in front of me, looking at me as if he was contemplating something before leaning forward and pressing his lips on mine. "Did you just get back?"

"Yeah," he replied as he rested his shield against the back of my couch.

"You must be starved. Let me fix something for you," I said. Steve looked like he was going to say something but he closed his mouth, unable to argue with me. "Why don't you go get a shower. I'm sure you'll feel better once you've washed away the mission," I smiled at him. Steve didn't reply just nodded his head before heading down the hall to my bedroom.

Seeing that it was early morning, I decided to go with an old favorite, biscuits and homemade gravy. I put the biscuits in the oven and threw a small portion of sausage in a pot to cook as I walked back to my bedroom and got some clothes from the drawer that was designated with my father's stuff. I sat the items on the edge of my bed and headed back to the kitchen to finish Steve's meal.

I plated Steve's food and sat it on the table. It had been a while since he had gotten in the shower and he still hadn't emerged which worried me. I put his plate in the microwave to stay warm before heading to my bedroom. As I entered the room I could hear the shower still running in my bathroom so I went in to check on him. The steam of the hot water had fogged over everything in the room but I could just barely see his silhouette through the shower door. He wasn't moving, just standing under the stream of water with his head hung. I contemplated calling out his name and making my presence known but decided against it before stripping myself. When I opened the door of the shower his head lifted slightly, just enough to see who was entering. Although I couldn't see all of his face I could see enough to tell he was upset. He was still covered in the soot from the mission and his eyes were now rimmed in red. "Steve, what's going on?" I asked as I stepped into the shower and stood in front of him. "What is it, babe?" It was seldom when anything got to the God-like man in front of me, which was why it scared me when it did. I waited as patiently as I could as he stood there not saying a word. "Steve, please talk to me," I begged, cupping his jaw in my hands and forcing him to look up at me.

"The mission," he paused, "It was Rumlow. He left a trail for us to find him. Led us straight to him," he sighed. "It was too easy. I should've known he was going to do something." Steve shook his head at himself. "He led us to this apartment building, we got the place evacuated, or so we thought. When I walked into the apartment there was a father and son sitting at the kitchen table. Rumlow had taken them hostage. He was talking, walking around them sitting there. He went on about how the apartment used to be a Hydra safe spot, years ago. Then he started talking about Bucky." I felt his jaw clench under my fingers and watched as the rest of him tensed as well. "It was like the whole world fell away. Like the only thing that mattered at that moment wasn't getting the hostages to safety, but hearing anything about Bucky, searching for clues in his words. He did it to sidetrack me and succeeded. The next thing I knew he had put a blade through the father's chest."

"Oh my God," I gasped.

"The kid started screaming, crying harder than he was before and Rumlow smacked him. When he pulled the knife from the father, he tipped him out of the chair and to the floor where the son joined his father, crying over his lifeless body." Steve's strong facade finally broke as his shoulders shuttered with a hidden sob. "That's when I pounced on Rumlow. I don't know what exactly happened, it all happened so fast. I kept shouting at the kid to run but he wouldn't leave his Dad's side. Then there was a huge explosion. It blew me out of the window, Rumlow too. But that little boy, he was still in there. He didn't make it."

"Oh, Steve," I quietly sobbed. I pressed my forehead against his and wrapped my arms around his neck, trying to convey my sympathy to him. I couldn't begin to imagine what he was feeling but I could only imagine the guilt he was feeling. Steve was beating himself up over it and I could most definitely tell.

"I couldn't save him or his Dad. Too wrapped up in Rumlow and my selfishness to find clues to where Bucky might be. Maybe I shouldn't be doing this anymore, Jolene." he said as he lifted his top lids to connect our eyes.

"Steve, with your job, you try to save as many people as you can and sometimes that doesn't mean everybody," I said as I tried to calm his demons. "If you can't find a way to live with that, next time, maybe nobody gets saved."

"I know," he sighed as he took a step back away from me and began to turn to face the stream of water again.

I cupped his face, making him turn his head back toward me before saying, "Steve, you are such a strong person. Not only physically but also emotionally. I know you stay strong emotionally not only for yourself but for everyone around you and the world. But here, with me, you don't have to be. You are the rock for everyone you know, but for once, let someone else be a rock for you, let me be that rock. You have the weight of the world on your shoulders and that's a heavy load to carry. Let me bear some of that weight for you. I'm not going anywhere. I'll be here for you always."

"Thank you," he said before turning his body to face me once again.

"I love you," I replied before placing a soft kiss on his lips. "Now let's get you cleaned up and fed so we can curl up in bed. You need some rest."

That day Steve let me take care of him. I bathed him not only in soap but in love. He didn't lift a finger while he showered, I cleaned him completely. And while this kind of scenario would usually be considered in a sexual manner, this time was not. I knew he was exhausted both physically and emotionally, he deserved this. I catered to him, bringing him his meal in bed after I had reheated it. I sang him to sleep as his head rested on my chest and his arm held me close. Steve was always so busy looking after the world that it was about time someone started looking after him and I was more than happy to be the one to do it.